Intellectual Whore

[true blue]

1 hour ago, Chicog said:

What's on the menu? Soup?

 

The coven convenes

[Calach]

 

3 minutes ago, cmsally said:

 

Says the guy who wanted to "practice his English"

Progress seems to be happening at an astounding rate!

 

 

 

Thanks for the encouragement. I'm flattered. 

[cmsally]

8 minutes ago, true blue said:

The coven convenes

 

The coven convenes maybe covertly and is probably covetous over what is to be found under the pot cover..

[LivinLOS]

1 hour ago, MaeJoMTB said:

 

I think you mean heated arguments from the men pretending to be women posters.

(there's always a lot of men claiming to be women in Thailand, some are quite convincing)

In the early internet days we used to say, all those claiming to be men in chat rooms are middle aged balding men, all those claiming to be women in chat rooms are middle aged balding man and all those claiming to be children in chat rooms are FBI agents.

 

I can't see forums being much different.

 

 

[SoiBiker]

Remarkable, the mental gymnastics some will go through to convince themselves the Thai expat world is a boy's only club.

[DSJPC]

u will never understand this behavior, so don't even try!...u need to change your circle of friends...not all us farang men are jerks!!!...best of luck!

[smotherb]

On 1/13/2017 at 10:03 PM, mesquite said:

Most western men I know here want nothing to do with same-age western women and realize much younger western women want nothing to do with them.  The men I know pretty much ignore western women.  Some have issues and anger toward western women, but I have never seen or heard of any of my friends being openly hostile.

 

The intellectual whore thing really surprises me. 

 

Truth be told, I'm as baffled as you are about the situation you describe.  Maybe someone can shed some light on it.

I may be able to respond to both the 'intellectual whore' and ‘open hostility’ positions. However, I too expect some disagreement and ill-feelings expressed in reply.

Many Thai partners, whether long- or short-term, do not speak the language of their farangs well-enough to carry on a simple conversation, let alone an intellectual one. Those farangs who may not be openly hostile to white women may seek female conversation from a woman who can speak English. I would hesitate call it using her as a whore, but that was your term.

Often, farang friends here enjoy talking to my wife. However, she is not white, she is a Filipina, but she went to high school and college in the states. She speaks English fluently, is intelligent and outgoing; so, she is easy to talk with and can carry on a conversation on almost any topic.

I also know several older English-speaking unattached white women here who get along well with the farangs. However, those women too are friendly, approachable and not uptight about being ‘intellectual whores.’

Those farangs who are openly hostile to you may not be the same ones who seek conversation. Those farangs may have previously been hurt in some way by white women—many farangs here claim their white wives did them wrong and took them to the cleaners.  I can see that, but cannot quite understand the open hostility to all white women because of it.  Or, maybe they sense in you an aloofness or some adverse opinion to their relationships with Thai women.

Additionally, your assessment of your own looks may not be apparent to the offending farangs. They may not share your opinion of yourself, especially those enamored by Asian women.

If you intend to stay here, I suggest you be more open, approachable, and understanding. Try to get to know their Thai women and stop thinking of their want to talk with you as treating you as an ‘intellectual whore.’   I’ll wager the ‘open hostility’ will wane, if you do.  

[Autonuaq]

Think you are looking for the wrong things.

Most western man and not intrested in western woman at all.

And also think you misinterpret the way things go and are.

 

Often seen western woman intepret good intentions wrong. Can be culture, can be nationality, can be believe related.

 

Enjoy life and do not worry too much.

Have a great day

 

 

[smotherb]

On 1/14/2017 at 9:39 AM, what2do said:

I guess off-topic question is why aren't Western women attracted to Thai men (as much as Western men toward Thai women)?

Fair question, off-topic or not. I think it is because of the Western perception that white women should not go with yellow men is much more prevalent than the other way around.

[samuibeachcomber]

Fair of face, nice of figure, soft of voice, moderately dressed, a "model", in a younger demographic, respectful, kind, giving to the community, able to keep good relations with others, work tirelessly for the community whilst expecting nothing in return?
 
You sound like a massive pain in the arse.  Perhaps that is why men don't like you.

Why do you care?

Great reply

[Deepinthailand]

22 minutes ago, smotherb said:

Fair question, off-topic or not. I think it is because of the Western perception that white women should not go with yellow men is much more prevalent than the other way around.

News to me Thais are yellow are they and all this time I thought they were dark! Must be color blind

[samuibeachcomber]

Thailand's a rough place to be for a single aged woman ....Try Gambia.

Sent from my iris 750 using Thaivisa Connect mobile app

[smotherb]

Just now, Deepinthailand said:

News to me Thais are yellow are they and all this time I thought they were dark! Must be color blind

white, yellow, black--from the same old Western perception.  

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

It's kind of amazing to me -- and telling about the thinking of some posters here -- that quite a few folks, 24 pages into this thread, seem to feel the need to continue to toss personal barbs and criticism of the OP here, instead of thoughtfully responding to her comments and the personal experiences she recounted.

 

For those who never bothered to read it or have some mangled impression of what the OP wrote, she made two main observations of "how Western men respond to me":

 

Quote

 

1). Open hostility for me as a farang woman

First, let me speak of open hostility.  I have had Western men tell me I should not be entitled to a retirement visa, as Thailand is "for them."  I have also been called a "fat cow," which is laughable.  I may not be a tiny Thai, but I look lovely, folks--unless one just hates the look of a Western woman.   This has wounded and surprised me.

 

 

Unless someone just enjoys being a farang woman hater, I'm challenged to find anything there to go after the OP about. She's simply recounting her personal experience. And based on some of the posts in this thread, I'd have every reason to believe that she's experienced exactly the kinds of things she said.

 

And then:

Quote

 

2) Western men seeking me out as (for lack of better terms) as their "intellectual whore."

Often this happens in queues: the airport, at Tops/Rimping, the Post Office, Immigration, waiting for transport, etc.  Western men will chat me up about Brexit, US elections, and world affairs in general.  They seem undernourished in speaking to a bright farang woman.  Sometimes there is a request for my phone number to "have coffee," or something similar .  Most always,, they have an Thai wife at home..

 

To me, asking for my time in this way seems to a form of marital cheating.  I feel I'm being asked to be their "intellectual whore."  It doesn''t seem right to me for these Western men (often showing open disdain for their female counterparts), to seek out someone like me for their unmet needs.

 

 

I really don't see anything in the above observation that's deserving of the kind of personal scorn being thrown out here. You may not agree with her thinking, you may object to her use of the term "intellectual whore," or maybe you want to claim you don't believe her experiences.  But even in any of those instances, personal attacks seem very unwarranted.

 

Unless there's some deeper scorn and anti-farang women issues going on in some posters' heads, as some of the prior posts in this thread pretty clearly suggest.

 

If I was going to take issue with the OP's second observation, instead of engaging in name calling, I might argue that the men who've been personally offensive to her are probably not the same ones who've been looking to chat her up about Brexit and such, despite having Thai wives at home.

 

I know in my case, with my Thai wife at home, it's pretty much a non-starter to have any kind of discussion "about Brexit, the U.S. elections or world affairs in general." My wife has a lot on her mind, and we talk a lot, but those aren't the topics we talk about together at home. Fortunately, I don't feel the compelling need to find anyone else to talk about those subjects with.

 

 

 

Edited January 17, 2017 by TallGuyJohninBKK

[watgate]

Don't flatter yourself. Just to be on the safe side maybe you should just wear a sign around your neck which says" I am not your intellectual whore so don't bother me".

[WinnieTheKhwai]

1 hour ago, SoiBiker said:

Remarkable, the mental gymnastics some will go through to convince themselves the Thai expat world is a boy's only club.

 

Clearly it isn't.  I bet a whole 5-10% or so of expats are female.

 

Although there isn't one 'expat world', of course.   I bet there are loads more women among missionary families and digital nomads.  Teachers even.  

 

For some reason most don't stick around for a really long time though, especially if single.

Edited January 17, 2017 by WinnieTheKhwai

[amykat]

10 minutes ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

It's kind of amazing to me -- and telling about the thinking of some posters here -- that quite a few folks, 24 pages into this thread, seem to feel the need to continue to toss personal barbs and criticism of the OP here, instead of thoughtfully responding to her comments and the personal experiences she recounted.

 

For those who never bothered to read it or have some mangled impression of what the OP wrote, she made two main observations of "how Western men respond to me":

 

 

Unless someone just enjoys being a farang woman hater, I'm challenged to find anything there to go after the OP about. She's simply recounting her personal experience.

 

And then:

 

I really don't see anything in the above observation that's deserving of the kind of personal scorn being thrown out here. You may not agree with her thinking, you may object to her use of the term "intellectual whore," or maybe you want to claim you don't believe her experiences.  But even in any of those instances, personal attacks seem very unwarranted.

 

Unless there's some deeper scorn and anti-farang women issues going on in some posters' heads, as some of the prior posts in this thread pretty clearly suggest.

 

 

 

I know you wrote this about the OP,  but I also wrote some things, and everybody did this to me. I think what I wrote I was even less upsetting and confusing to people and gave much less ammunition for posters to work with yet the only responses that I got were personal attacks for the most part, or useless attacks not really on point.

 

I simply tried to say that many men here dislike Western women and to tried to give them a different viewpoint.  This news seems to shock them and then they must attack you, blame you, deny it,  ...especially if a Western women delivers it.

 

I bet they won't call you the same things they called me simply because a man delivered the same message.

 

[WinnieTheKhwai]

15 minutes ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

It's kind of amazing to me -- and telling about the thinking of some posters here -- that quite a few folks, 24 pages into this thread, seem to feel the need to continue to toss personal barbs and criticism of the OP here, instead of thoughtfully responding to her comments and the personal experiences she recounted.

 

For those who never bothered to read it or have some mangled impression of what the OP wrote, she made two main observations of "how Western men respond to me":

 

Yeah, you know what: nobody in all these pages could relate to those experiences.  Some haven't doubted them and just stated something like 'well there are good men too like me', others found it so unlikely and so unlike anything they see among expat men they know that they even doubt the validity or accuracy of the experience.   This by the way applies to the women forum members too: nobody had the experience the OP speaks of.  

 

Or maybe those women posters just aren't the pretty intellectual powerhouses the OP claims to be. (Maybe that's why that paragraph was there, to create some distance from other women. Who knows. )

 

 

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

1 minute ago, amykat said:

I bet they won't call you the same things they called me simply because a man delivered the same message.

 

Give it time...

[garryjohns]

12 minutes ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

It's kind of amazing to me -- and telling about the thinking of some posters here -- that quite a few folks, 24 pages into this thread, seem to feel the need to continue to toss personal barbs and criticism of the OP here, instead of thoughtfully responding to her comments and the personal experiences she recounted.

 

For those who never bothered to read it or have some mangled impression of what the OP wrote, she made two main observations of "how Western men respond to me":

 

 

Unless someone just enjoys being a farang woman hater, I'm challenged to find anything there to go after the OP about. She's simply recounting her personal experience.

 

And then:

 

I really don't see anything in the above observation that's deserving of the kind of personal scorn being thrown out here. You may not agree with her thinking, you may object to her use of the term "intellectual whore," or maybe you want to claim you don't believe her experiences.  But even in any of those instances, personal attacks seem very unwarranted.

 

Unless there's some deeper scorn and anti-farang women issues going on in some posters' heads, as some of the prior posts in this thread pretty clearly suggest.

 

 

 IMO this nonsensical thread which has been posted by whomever and for whatever real purpose  has surely bought out the worst of the worst from so many posters .

A sad and pathetic reaction from so many.

Quite a display even for this forum, and as any posters have left  because of the deplorable content of late, my feeling is summed up  hence..'"clickbait".

This crap and the frequent news releases with sensationalistic headlines appear to be the new "norm"..also to gain "clicks"  take a look at the" Lion attack "thread..total BS!

Of course it could also be as has been suggested just another TROLL.

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

1 minute ago, garryjohns said:

 IMO this nonsensical thread which has been posted by whomever and for whatever real purpose  has surely bought out the worst of the worst from so many posters .

A sad and pathetic reaction from so many.

Quite a display even for this forum, and as any posters have left  because of the deplorable content of late

, my feeling is summed up  hence..'"clickbait".

This crap and the frequent news releases with sensationalistic headlines appear to be the new "norm"..also to gain "clicks"  take a look at the" Lion attack "thread..total BS!

Of course it could also be as has been suggested just another TROLL.

 

I agree this thread has surfaced a lot of really unpleasant, offensive thinking and comments by a number of male posters here.

 

But on your second point, I find nothing in the OP here to make me think it's anything other than one person's personal account of her own experiences. It wasn't ginned up by someone at TV to generate clicks. Nor do I believe that was the OP's intention, but rather, to spur a conversation on her issues -- which certainly has resulted.

 

[Khon Kaen Dave]

garryjohns

Then you should read  post,i was nothing if not sympathetic to her plight.I do not like being sorted and placed among the morons,and misogynists that posted negatively. 

[WinnieTheKhwai]

6 minutes ago, garryjohns said:

Quite a display even for this forum, and as any posters have left  because of the deplorable content of late, my feeling is summed up  hence..'"clickbait".

This crap and the frequent news releases with sensationalistic headlines appear to be the new "norm"..also to gain "clicks"  take a look at the" Lion attack "thread..total BS!

Of course it could also be as has been suggested just another TROLL.

 

 

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

22 minutes ago, WinnieTheKhwai said:

 others found it so unlikely and so unlike anything they see among expat men they know that they even doubt the validity or accuracy of the experience.

 

Well, considering that some posters in this thread have publicly referred to farang expat women as "white meat" and various other derogatory references, you might want to rethink that presumption.

 

Also, to argue the OP's is a troll post seems to me just an attempt to dismiss/ignore the issues she's raising, without having to actually confront/address the conduct she's describing.

 

 

Edited January 17, 2017 by TallGuyJohninBKK

[MaeJoMTB]

1 hour ago, smotherb said:

Often, farang friends here enjoy talking to my wife. However, she is not white, she is a Filipina, but she went to high school and college in the states. She speaks English fluently, is intelligent and outgoing; so, she is easy to talk with and can carry on a conversation on almost any topic.

 

 

 

I have not been posting in this forum for a while as I have been spending a lot of time in the Philippines. The women speak excellent English and totally get our humour and culture and seem to have an understanding of the world outside the Philippines. The ones I have met are also generally younger, much better educated and expect a lot less in the way of financial rewards than their Thai equivalents. Not to mention once you marry a Filipino the VISA is easy and you can work from day 1 (if you have the need to earn money).

 

Good choice SB!

 

 

[garryjohns]

10 minutes ago, Khon Kaen Dave said:

garryjohns

Then you should read  post,i was nothing if not sympathetic to her plight.I do not like being sorted and placed among the morons,and misogynists that posted negatively. 

 

There have been quite a few sympathetic replies KKD,..sorry i didn't commend you and the others but you will notice i did say " worst of the worst from so many posters  " not all..

 

[worgeordie]

I thought this post was closed,now it's open again,maybe because

it seems to be the only one that is receiving any responses .

regards worgeordie

[WinnieTheKhwai]

1 hour ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

 

Well, considering that some posters in this thread have publicly referred to farang expat women as "white meat" and various other derogatory references, you might want to rethink that presumption.

 

Also, to argue the OP's is a troll post seems to me just an attempt to dismiss/ignore the issues she's raising, without having to actually confront/address the conduct she's describing.

 

That there is hostility among some men I'm willing to accept, just like hostility from some Western women towards any man living in Thailand. (Although this is also not something I have encountered, but people claim it happens.)

 

The thing though that has everyone baffled, including the women here, is the actual topic of this discussion, and notion that people striking up a friendly conversation somehow demeans her as an intellectual whore, and that this represents a challenge her life.

 

We then got completely preposterous grouping of men in a Venn diagram with two intersecting circles of those hostile to her, and those attempting a friendly conversation.   And all of it was a problem.   

 

You can rant a little in the general direction of men making uncouth comments here, but let's not forget that the original post was quite preposterous.

 

Not sure you read the entire topic, but check out some of the direct replies to the OP from NancyL and the one following it by Bhuddalady. http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/963547-intellectual-whore/?page=2#comment-11520233   

 

Edited January 17, 2017 by WinnieTheKhwai

[amykat]

1 hour ago, worgeordie said:

I thought this post was closed,now it's open again,maybe because

it seems to be the only one that is receiving any responses .

regards worgeordie

 

It is because we farang women are really quite popular in own special way!!

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

21 minutes ago, WinnieTheKhwai said:

The thing though that has everyone baffled, including the women here, is the actual topic of this discussion, and notion that people striking up a friendly conversation somehow demeans her as an intellectual whore, and that this represents a challenge her life.

 

 

That chatting up issue wasn't THE topic of this thread. That aspect was one of two related issues the OP raised in her post, as I've quoted her above.

 

But still, you can't understand the disconnect/discomfort you might feel if one group of people were repeatedly being personally offensive/dismissive to you, and then at the same time, members of that same group at times wanted to chat you up socially??? [Since I'm putting the shoes on your feet, I'm leaving out of the comparative equation the OP's added issues about married farangs with Thai wives].

Edited January 17, 2017 by TallGuyJohninBKK