5 years here,but this has left me stunned

[ed strong]

16 hours ago, Elkski said:

We do need an update on this romance.   But I and others have hyjacked this thread.   To the poster before me.  Can you qualify your last generalization?  Do you date girls with predominantly a certain education level?  Primary, secondary, HS, BS, masters.  And what career path did your women have?   I have found college educated Thai women to be as thought provoking as western women.  Without all the baggage.  

Being honest my first 'gf' in Thailand was working in a salon and met her when i popped in for a pedicure. Looking back she might well have been on the game but im happy to presume she worked in that salon, saying that she never worked their again!? Anyway she was a party girl and i was staying in the UK and it all got too hectic (many cases of her being a nutter and enjoys partying too much)

 

After that i 'upgraded' and dated two girls over the next 8 years both professional ladies with university background, nice house nice car etc. These were both a nightmare in the long run and lost money because of their trust and the fact that i thought i had found a decent one.

 

They definitely both had baggage and yes they were certainly thought provoking!

 

I've dabbled with the odd bar girl in between nothing serious as you know they are going to be a waste of time but tbh have become friends with a couple of them that have bf's in UK and once you hear their story you kinda feel sorry for them but not as sorry as their bfs whom send them money and apply for visas etc!

 

Ive asked a couple of ladies and whom visit the UK and Germany on visas. Neither of them want to go but if they don't show interest they know the money will dry up.

 

The other thing i have learnt is that we are so lucky being brought up in a 1st world country. Its gives us such opportunity that we take for granted. Yes we are still corrupt but compared to places like Thailand....everything's above board :)

 

 

 

 

[bbi1]

Sounds like your gf is dumb as can be and you don't seem much brighter either for giving her a monthly allowance & paying for everything for her and her kids. Why doesn't she pay for her own holiday & why the hell are you giving her an allowance? Does she not have a job?

[The Deerhunter]

Puts me in mind of the two old Dagwood & Blondie jokes.  (I did say old) In one, Blondie is saying "How can we be out of money?    There are sitll 10 cheques left in the book.  In the other one she is saying that  "With the amount of money she saved last time she went clothes shopping, there should be plenty left for her to go clothes shopping again."  Dagwood, along with the rest of us would sympathize.

 

I have to say that with that level of dim-wittedness, she is likely beyond education and saving.  Time to have a real good think if she is really the one for you.  If you start to get old and frail and think you may be relying on her in the future to care for you , (as is the situation with many of us)  then you better start thinking about your safety and financial security now rather than then.   Just a thought.  

Mine is not like that at all and could have smelt a scam from a Taxi driver like that a mile away.   And so should yours and that is probably the biggest worry.  Maybe she has only told you half the story.  And no, I have no idea what the other half could be.

 

[free123]

On 4.5.2017 at 5:49 AM, thaifoodruns said:

Mistake 1. Never date women with kids from other men


Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

simple never give money to a (thai) women

[JohnJay]

Reminds me of a time getting a tuk tuk in Bangkok. The driver was telling us to go and look around some crappy clothing store in exchange for 50 baht less on the fare so he could get a commission. I refused, and she seemed to agree with me. Then 10 minutes later we're rolling up at this Indian clothing store "Sorry I not want he sad ok darling?". Another 10 minutes of Indians getting me to try on PVC leather jackets, trying to measure me up for a suit, we left. And then I ended up paying the full fare for tuk tuk anyway. Maybe it's something about losing face if they refuse it, no idea.

[Rc2702]

6 minutes ago, JohnJay said:

Reminds me of a time getting a tuk tuk in Bangkok. The driver was telling us to go and look around some crappy clothing store in exchange for 50 baht less on the fare so he could get a commission. I refused, and she seemed to agree with me. Then 10 minutes later we're rolling up at this Indian clothing store "Sorry I not want he sad ok darling?". Another 10 minutes of Indians getting me to try on PVC leather jackets, trying to measure me up for a suit, we left. And then I ended up paying the full fare for tuk tuk anyway. Maybe it's something about losing face if they refuse it, no idea.

That is the oldest trick in the book. When was this 20 years ago?

[JohnJay]

Just now, Rc2702 said:

That is the oldest trick in the book. When was this 20 years ago?

2013... I would have paid the extra 50 baht not to be accosted by sweaty Indians...

[Rc2702]

5 minutes ago, JohnJay said:

2013... I would have paid the extra 50 baht not to be accosted by sweaty Indians...

I never use tuk tuks in bkk unless I know where it's heading.(shirt hop) Those guys are just scum out for as much as possible and never listen. I did actually not pay 1 twice bit one story is too long so the other just tried what you mentioned and when I saw he was determined not to listen we jumped out and he put his hand out and I waied him and he said flluck youuuuu I said good luck to you too.

Edited June 14, 2017 by Rc2702

[JohnJay]

1 minute ago, Rc2702 said:

I never use tuk tuks in bkk unless I know where it's heading.(shirt hop) Those guys are just scum out for as much as possible and never listen. I did actually not pay 1 twice bit one story is too long so the other just tried what you mentioned and when I saw he was determined not to listen we jumped out and he out his hand out and I waied him and he said flluck youuuuu I said good luck to you too.

Yeah they are all rip off merchants. Can't go wrong with the baht buses in Pattaya though. I'm not a big fan of BKK myself

[Dumbastheycome]

On 6/14/2017 at 6:14 PM, free123 said:

simple never give money to a (thai) women

You suggest  destroying  the economy  of  places  such as  Pattaya??? lol

[kunfish]

On 5/30/2017 at 6:45 PM, JAFO said:

Good point on dating sites. Who knows. I certainly wouldnt ask.

 

My comment on dating sites is that I have met quite a few foreigners that have used Thai dating sites.  The feedback is that a great portion are scammers, prostitutes, gold diggers etc. As I was shown by friends at work, Thais are not looking for Thais on the sites foreigners use.  Thais have there own sites for connecting.  Now I am no way saying that all the women who post up profiles on foreigner sites are scamming but I personally would be extremely cautious.  I know 2 foreigners that met what they called a great woman only to both be scammed. 1 was quick and he caught it. The other she was really good and had 3 foreigners on the hook. I was actually quite impressed the shell game she had going.  

 

Now in fairness I am aware my sample size is small but its enough. One thing to point out. In all my years working here I have never had a Thai gal at work ask me to find her a foreigner or do I have any friends. I feel that professional working women have no interest in foreigner men in general. They are financially secure and have professional careers and I suspect that bringing an old foreigner man into the mix actually complicates their life for a host of reasons. So I tell guys that ask about dating sites. If the relationship moves along quick and too easy remain guarded.  

 

 

 

 

There are plenty of good women on the dating sites. There are also tons of foreigners who are scammers looking to get money from Thai women looking for a foreign husband.

 

There are many middle-class Thai women, true working professionals who are divorced and want to marry a foreigner. 

 

It's not hard to find a non-scammer. You just have to know yourself well. The old saying, "Know thyself." If you are clear of mind and heart and are not in a hurry, you can find the right Thai woman online. Not a good Thai woman, but a woman who is the right one for you.

 

I met my wife online. I was in the States (and still am). I simply found someone I could hit it off with. Someone I could converse with and just have an everyday, natural conversation. Since I'm college educated, middle class, office working stiff, I was interested in the same in a woman. My wife put herself through college, was career accountant with the government, and was just herself, plain and simple, when we chatted using Skpe.

 

We "dated" online through Skype and a some visits for 3 years until we decided to get married. I was in no hurry and the moment had to be right. The moment came on the 3rd trip, after seeing each other for maybe hundreds of hours. We literally had 3 hour chat sessions almost everyday.

 

Her friend had a similar background. She met a fellow from England. They are happily married in Thailand. This after her friend had run into a scammer from another country. She's lucky she persisted, because the English fellow is quite nice.

 

Yes, there are scammers in Thailand, maybe too many. But there are also many professional, educated, middle-class women, divorced, looking for a foreign husband. Farang just need to seek them out. Each person, man or woman, needs to take a lot of caution, like you would take caution in any relationship regardless of location or background.

 

[ed strong]

On 23/06/2017 at 3:16 AM, kunfish said:

There are also tons of foreigners who are scammers looking to get money from Thai women looking for a foreign husband.

Good luck trying to scam a Thai women and getting away with it lol

 

Thai women seem to have an uncanny way of knowing what it is you want and then fulfilling that need.

 

Any Thai women dating or marring a farang would lose respect from other Thais, especially the middle class ones.

[kunfish]

On 6/24/2017 at 2:50 AM, ed strong said:

Good luck trying to scam a Thai women and getting away with it lol

 

Thai women seem to have an uncanny way of knowing what it is you want and then fulfilling that need.

 

Any Thai women dating or marring a farang would lose respect from other Thais, especially the middle class ones.

Some women get scammed because they are simply people and I wasn't aware of Thai women being more clairvoyant than other people. Maybe some are and some are not. Some want to escape poverty and do get tricked. Professional scammers are just that and often good at what they do.

 

People of all races often look down on people marrying outside their race. Maybe less in the USA, but its the world over. People judge others by their looks. What's important is to not care about what others think.

[ed strong]

On 28/06/2017 at 2:12 AM, kunfish said:

Some want to escape poverty and do get tricked. Professional scammers are just that and often good at what they do.

If I was attempting to scam someone id probably aim for a bracket slightly higher than 'living in poverty'

[Bastos60]

On 6/10/2017 at 2:19 AM, bbi1 said:

Sounds like your gf is dumb as can be and you don't seem much brighter either for giving her a monthly allowance & paying for everything for her and her kids. Why doesn't she pay for her own holiday & why the hell are you giving her an allowance? Does she not have a job?

I agree with you. She wants a holiday, she needs to manage to do it with her allowance.

[Bastos60]

On 5/30/2017 at 1:10 PM, ed strong said:

How many of you guys frequent Thai bars? or Thai only areas? None because you would probably end up in trouble and certainly no one would be interested to talk to you. Kind of different to the tourist areas, eh.

I don't go to thai (only) bars alone because of my limited thai. But with both of the women I have dated we went to Thai only bars/restaurants/disco's.
But I rather stick to the farang oriented bars tbh.

On 5/30/2017 at 1:10 PM, ed strong said:

Your relationship with your MIL (Should you have one) will also tell you more about the Thai attitude to farangs.

The amount of money you or you wife give her will be directly proportional to the amount of affection and Interest that MIL shows in you.

Well I am not really looking for affection from my MIL but she does want her daughter to be taken care of. She doesn't want her daughter involved with slackers.

Anything the MIL receives is from the girlfriend, even if I am the one paying. I do buy the father a bottle of whiskey when I visit and present it to him.

 

On 5/30/2017 at 1:10 PM, ed strong said:

My best trip to Thailand was my first one as I was so naive to the goings on and just went along with it without thinking too much. Having seen and experienced many aspects of thai life (Ive been pattaya twice and hated both trips) so don't go down that route as is the normal retort to a post like this.

Same here, my first trip was my best experience of Thailand. Never really bothered with Pattaya, just stayed there as it is a holiday resort, but also went to other cities with the girl
I was with at the time. She showed me how Thai live, her city has very very few farang living there so I was a novelty for many children there too.

Did I hate Pattaya, lets say it like this, I didn't care much for beer bars and couldn't care at all for agogo's.

 

On 5/30/2017 at 1:10 PM, ed strong said:

 

In some ways i wish i was just an ostrich like that first couple of trips. However i still enjoy Thailand and the people there.

Everytime I go to Thailand I always hope to experience it again with some kind of naivety.

 

 

[kunfish]

13 hours ago, ed strong said:

If I was attempting to scam someone id probably aim for a bracket slightly higher than 'living in poverty'

The angle is to work on desparate women who will borrow money to give to scammer.