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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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59 minutes ago, chickenslegs said:

She's a keeper

Note for Europeans: A dozen is 12.

 

Not always, he got a bakers dozen.

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A guy goes into a shop and orders some Irish sausage.

 

Shopkeeper says: "Oh, you must be Irish."

 

Guy said, "Come on, man. You think because I order Irish sausage I'm Irish. What if somebody came in here and ordered French toast? Would you think he was French? What if somebody came in here and ordered a Belgian waffle? Would you consider that guy a Belgian? If a guy came in and ordered a German bratwurst, would you consider that fellow to be a German. I think it is absolutely ridiculous that just because I come in and order Irish sausage you assume that I'm Irish. Why would you do that?''

 

And the shopkeeper says: "Well, first of all it's a hardware store."

 

(adapted from an old Norm Macdonald joke - RIP Norm)

14 minutes ago, fasteddie said:

Not always, he got a bakers dozen.

Now you're just confusing the Europeans.

4 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

Now you're just confusing the Europeans.

I'm English, I am European.

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cover.

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On his 90th birthday, Bernie's remaining friends chipped in and got him a call girl as a surprise present.

Bernie hears the doorbell and slowly makes his way to the door. He opens the door and sees a scantily clad young lady standing in the doorway. She says to him: " I'm here to offer you super sex"

Bernie ponders for a few seconds and says.: " I'll take the soup"

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