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You Know you have crossed the border into Laos-----

---when you see innovations in their Work

The wife's back on the warpath again. Last night she said she wanted to make a sex movie, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.

 

My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.

 

I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.

 

After both suffering from depression for a while, the wife and I were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, screw it, I'll soldier on!

 

The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her,"Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"

 

My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you <deleted>!" "Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"

 

I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like she's moving during sex.

I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick-pocketed..

How could anyone stoop so low?

1 hour ago, WorriedNoodle said:

There is a lot of it going on there all the time.   

21 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

Tou would need to be really tanked up to get it on with that tank!