Those Wacky Farangs!

[NCC1701A]

I just had an idea for a new Thai comedy television show called "Those Wacky Farangs!"

 

It follows the mis-adventures of a Farang living in Thailand and his Thai family and his Farang friends.

 

I have some ideas for a few scripts but as you know I need a new script for every week.

 

So I need some more ideas. Anybody got any ideas for a story.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Crossy]

Just make sure you include:-

• A ladyboy
• A midget (find a midget ladyboy and you're made)
• An evil older woman
• A pretty but dumb babe
• A ghost or two (blood from the eyes is good value)
• Maybe thow in a mafia type and some cops for good measure

Just use one storyline and swap the parts around each episode. Get a "boing" machine if it's a comedy.

 

[Golden Triangle]

22 minutes ago, Crossy said:

Just make sure you include:-

• A ladyboy
• A midget (find a midget ladyboy and you're made)
• An evil older woman
• A pretty but dumb babe
• A ghost or two (blood from the eyes is good value)
• Maybe thow in a mafia type and some cops for good measure

Just use one storyline and swap the parts around each episode. Get a "boing" machine if it's a comedy.

 

A boing machine is a must, they'd never know to laugh otherwise, oh, don't forget the sick or dying buffalo, the friendly brother, the list goes on........

[Kwasaki]

I got my hobbies thanks and Netflix. ????

[GinBoy2]

Oh, and don't forget guns. Lots of guns!

 

Those Thai guns that seem to shoot lots of bullets but never hit anything.

 

That way the wacky farang can try to shoot the midget ladyboy, nobody dies.

 

Of course this would all be in revenge for the midget ladyboy and the older evil woman robbing the gullible wacky farang of his life savings, causing him to have a heart attack and ending up in hospital. Cue, cute nurse and incredibly hansum man Doctor. 

 

Our wacky farang can then lie there with the requisite bandage around his head, plotting his dastardly revenge with the seemly non lethal bullets.

 

.....I think I need a lie down now!

[Nyezhov]

2 hours ago, NCC1701A said:

I just had an idea for a new Thai comedy television show called "Those Wacky Farangs!"

 

It follows the mis-adventures of a Farang living in Thailand and his Thai family and his Farang friends.

 

I have some ideas for a few scripts but as you know I need a new script for every week.

 

So I need some more ideas. Anybody got any ideas for a story.  

I have about 10 stories already written. Ive done Reality TV so I know how its done. All I need is some financial backing and some  talented folks.

[roo860]

I have about 10 stories already written. Ive done Reality TV so I know how its done. All I need is some financial backing and some  talented folks.

Were you in The Osbournes?

Sent from my SM-G920F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[NCC1701A]

Episode One starts with Bill the American Farang who is 60 and is being visited by his 58 year old brother and his wife who is 55. They are both stunned to meet Boom, Bill's smokin' hot 28 year old girlfriend he met in a bar. There is a funny conversation as they realize Boom does not speak a word of English.               

[scorecard]

2 hours ago, Crossy said:

Just make sure you include:-

• A ladyboy
• A midget (find a midget ladyboy and you're made)
• An evil older woman
• A pretty but dumb babe
• A ghost or two (blood from the eyes is good value)
• Maybe thow in a mafia type and some cops for good measure

Just use one storyline and swap the parts around each episode. Get a "boing" machine if it's a comedy.

 

I have all of these folks in my extended family except the midget and the cop.

 

And they are all dysfunctional. But many of my old family at home were also dysfunctional, is that a good script basis, does that help? 

 

Edited February 3, 2019 by scorecard

[Nyezhov]

3 minutes ago, NCC1701A said:

Episode One starts with Bill the American Farang who is 60 and is being visited by his 58 year old brother and his wife who is 55. They are both stunned to meet Boom, Bill's smokin' hot 28 year old girlfriend he met in a bar. There is a funny conversation as they realize Boom does not speak a word of English.               

Boom is a Ladyboy too. Totally hot. She needs to be able to talk fractured bar girl english. Of course when she meets the bro and sis, she says stuff like "where you come from?". Boom is from Buriram. 

 

Almost like le Cage aux Folles. I even look like Ugo Tognazzi

[Crossy]

2 minutes ago, Nyezhov said:

Boom is a Ladyboy too.

Shall we make her a very short ladyboy and a cop too, just to complete the image?

[GinBoy2]

A corrupt midget ladyboy cop.....I like it

[Crossy]

3 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

A corrupt midget ladyboy cop.....I like it

If we make her evil, older and dead we will only need one character ????

 

[GinBoy2]

3 minutes ago, Crossy said:

If we make her evil, older and dead we will only need one character ????

 

Nah we need more. Remember our wacky farang will speak no Thai or Lao, so we need a cast of characters who can talk, and of course scream to the total bewilderment of wacky farang 

Edited February 3, 2019 by GinBoy2

[cyril sneer]

'go to bed' is the only advice i can give

[NCC1701A]

OK another Farang who's name is George who became a hypochondriac after coming to Thailand. He has become obsessed with everything he eats and comes in contact with. He is very much like Christopher Lloyd's character in Taxi. He is completely over whelmed. He wears a mask everywhere he goes. He had sex one time two years ago and is still getting HIV tests.          

[Lacessit]

We need a villain wacked on Lao Khao, or spaced out on yaa baa. And a village idiot. I can supply all of the above from my GF's village, and they aren't acting. Plus the neighbour who fires off a shotgun during thunderstorms to frighten the evil spirits. What am I doing there? Don't ask.

[GinBoy2]

3 minutes ago, NCC1701A said:

OK another Farang who's name is George who became a hypochondriac after coming to Thailand. He has become obsessed with everything he eats and comes in contact with. He is very much like Christopher Lloyd's character in Taxi. He is completely over whelmed. He wears a mask everywhere he goes. He had sex one time two years ago and is still getting HIV tests.          

I definitely think 'George' needs to have had a sexual liaison with our corrupt midget ladyboy cop.

 

The shame, confusion and guilt, that will take up a couple of episodes, and then we can work in a hospital scene or two

[Nyezhov]

20 minutes ago, NCC1701A said:

OK another Farang who's name is George who became a hypochondriac after coming to Thailand. He has become obsessed with everything he eats and comes in contact with. He is very much like Christopher Lloyd's character in Taxi. He is completely over whelmed. He wears a mask everywhere he goes. He had sex one time two years ago and is still getting HIV tests.          

Nice one. I filed that one away.

[GinBoy2]

So, now George is wracked with guilt and anxiety over his pseudo gay encounter with our midget ladyboy. Wacky farang is still seething with anger over the loss of his life saving to ladyboy and, incredibly attractive, but evil older lady...where do we go from here?

How do we weave in our village idiot and Yaa Baa guy (he needs to be a bus driver btw)

Edited February 3, 2019 by GinBoy2

[Nyezhov]

17 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

We need a villain wacked on Lao Khao, or spaced out on yaa baa. And a village idiot. I can supply all of the above from my GF's village, and they aren't acting. Plus the neighbour who fires off a shotgun during thunderstorms to frighten the evil spirits. What am I doing there? Don't ask.

Another one filed away. Wakes you up does it? Look outside and there is this wild eyed freak shooting into the sky and screaming incantations? So what do you do? Confront him? Naw, head into the house, make a cheese sarnie, grab a Leo and head back outside. Cut to stroke of lightning, you munching, then to the screaming dude......

 

I could do the whole thing right, 7-10 half hour plus episodes for probably $1000 bucks an episode (30K baht) If anyone seriously wants to mess with something amusing, y'all just let me know. Need two more cameras, some sound stuff and permits.

 

[HLover]

Would Go Fund Me support this guy's fantasy?

30k baht would buy a lot better entertainment in the real world.

[Spidey]

1 hour ago, Nyezhov said:

I even look like Ugo Tognazzi

                

 

Sorry, but you're just not my type.

 

I presume you're auditioning for the ladyboy part.

Edited February 3, 2019 by Spidey

[Lacessit]

I can supply the slapstick with our dog, whose principal delight in life is getting under the feet of people. Although I understand it's a bad idea to act with children and animals.

Wait, there's more. The firecrackers going of at all times when someone dies, to frighten off the spirits. Local colour with roosters crowing at 2 am next door. Or the piece de resistance, large geckos in the outdoor kitchen whose sound is uncannily like f*** you.

If you want a ladyboy, there's an elderly one at the local servo that would be perfect. He's taken a liking to me, and engages me in conversation. I'm too polite to tell him I'm straight.

[lemonjelly]

Which episode does Boom have a kid that has an uncanny resemblance to her “brother” who frequents the house the whackey farang bought for this fine lady?

[GinBoy2]

11 minutes ago, lemonjelly said:

Which episode does Boom have a kid that has an uncanny resemblance to her “brother” who frequents the house the whackey farang bought for this fine lady?

For sure that's the cliffhanger at the end of episode 1

[scorecard]

19 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

I can supply the slapstick with our dog, whose principal delight in life is getting under the feet of people. Although I understand it's a bad idea to act with children and animals.

Wait, there's more. The firecrackers going of at all times when someone dies, to frighten off the spirits. Local colour with roosters crowing at 2 am next door. Or the piece de resistance, large geckos in the outdoor kitchen whose sound is uncannily like f*** you.

If you want a ladyboy, there's an elderly one at the local servo that would be perfect. He's taken a liking to me, and engages me in conversation. I'm too polite to tell him I'm straight.

Regarding the ladyboy, a standard line could be 'farang have to pay every person in the family they marry into 50,000Baht a month salary, It's the Thai law'. 

 

I'm sure the ladyboy in my outer family won't mind his line being stolen and hearing it on TV, it would make him feel so important and he could buy a few more pairs of high heels.

 

[scorecard]

2 hours ago, scorecard said:

I have all of these folks in my extended family except the midget and the cop.

 

And they are all dysfunctional. But many of my old family at home were also dysfunctional, is that a good script basis, does that help? 

 

Just a thought, maybe it could be a midget cop.

 

[Lacessit]

2 minutes ago, scorecard said:

Just a thought, maybe it could be a midget cop.

 

How about an albino Thai? Saw a woman with two normal-looking kids in a village near Mae Hong Son. Bright red skin.

[tutsiwarrior]

I'm confused...who is yer intended audience? do we want evil or benevolent midgets, cops, lady boys, etc?

 

$50000 up front, 50% of the movie rights and 3% of the box office and video gross and I might think about it...

 

ye gots t'talk turkey, pal...