Elderly Mom with Alzheimer's Forced to Leave Thailand

[impulse]

23 minutes ago, BadSpottedDog said:

The care in her home country is horrid and unaffordable. It costs $10,000 USD and UP for a 24/7 Alzheimer's patient. And no .. the US government doesn't pay, and no insurance will cover her.

 

For 1.5 months at that rate, you can get her an Elite Visa for 500,000 baht.

 

Or you can go the visa agent route, pay a little graft and corruption and she's set.

 

The problem you're presenting is a shame.  It is.  But there are solutions, other than getting hacked off and heading for the USA.   

 

Just a hint, every day that you postpone getting on with a solution makes it that much more difficult.  And it's been many months since the changes were announced.  

 

Edited May 26, 2019 by impulse

[the guest]

It's sad the USA do not look after its own citizens, must be a terrible place to live.

[Damrongsak]

1 hour ago, BadSpottedDog said:

... It costs $10,000 USD and UP for a 24/7 Alzheimer's patient....

In my neck of the woods, full-time "sitters" cost about $25 USD per hour.  Not sure if Alzheimer's patients are more.  But add that to maybe $4,000 USD per month or more for a room/meals/showers & dressing assistance  PLUS maybe $1,600 for a higher care level.  There may be Medicaid assistance for those who are disabled and have no money.  Or they will take all you have and go from there. 

 

I should have had my Mom rob a 7-11 back when she was still driving her car at age 86 or so.

[madmen]

9 hours ago, JulieM said:

What are you talking about? Gofundme is not limited to emergencies. Gofundme is primarily used to raise money from friends and family in any situation requiring financial help. Strangers can give as well, and often do if the campaign gets media coverage. Since the OP is willing to share her mother's image, that goes a long way to establishing credibility.

 

Also, I agree with the comments that with the right visa agent, all of these problems will go away. 

I know exactly what Im talking about.

"It is estimated that there are approximately 44 million people worldwide living withAlzheimer's disease "

 

Really everyone of them can try go fund me? 

 

Thats not how it works.  the truth is she is well cared for with a wonderful family= zero chance of GFM

 

GFM works with young tourists with staggering medical bills and not old folk in their 80's with age related illness

 

[dcnx]

4 hours ago, the guest said:

It's sad the USA do not look after its own citizens, must be a terrible place to live.

Great place to live. Terrible place to get sick of you don’t have money or your insurance doesn’t cover the illness.

[DingDongLing]

Thailand is too unpredictable and changes by the day to invest any sizeable amount in any business here

[baansgr]

No need for the funds if use an agent....must be one in Chiang Mai that someone can recommend

[Crossy]

A sad situation indeed.

 

It's probably too late now and I've not read every post, but would it be possible for mom to piggy-back on your visa as a dependant (which she obviously is)?

 

[BritManToo]

Your mom can get an extension as your dependent.

Assuming you have a valid VISA or extension.

For some reason immigration never suggest this, you have to tell them.

[ubonjoe]

2 hours ago, Crossy said:

It's probably too late now and I've not read every post, but would it be possible for mom to piggy-back on your visa as a dependant (which she obviously is)?

Correct but we need to know what type of visa or extension of stay the OP is on.

Most categories of extensions allow for a parent who is 50 or over to get an extension for being a member of their family without financial proof being required.

[Vacuum]

11 hours ago, BadSpottedDog said:

Thank you! We would do that, but now immigration is saying that 400k has to stay in the bank account for the whole year! Moving my Mom in a year will be even more difficult with her condition, so all the plans are in motion to move her Tuesday. No one really knows how much more severe the changes will be. Better safe than sorry. ????

Use an agent.

[JulieM]

10 hours ago, madmen said:

Go fund me wont work. This is not an emergency.

Gofundme has many examples of people who have raised money to help people for medical bills:  

 

https://www.gofundme.com/discover/medical-fundraiser

[LongTang]

7 hours ago, madmen said:

I know exactly what Im talking about.

"It is estimated that there are approximately 44 million people worldwide living withAlzheimer's disease "

 

Really everyone of them can try go fund me? 

 

Thats not how it works.  the truth is she is well cared for with a wonderful family= zero chance of GFM

 

GFM works with young tourists with staggering medical bills and not old folk in their 80's with age related illness

 

I don't understand why to insist on this point? The OP has already exposed his story to the world, so he has nothing to lose at this point.

The fact there are so many people whose families been affected by it may actually increase the amount of potential sympathizers.

[essox essox]

12 hours ago, BadSpottedDog said:

Thank you! We would do that, but now immigration is saying that 400k has to stay in the bank account for the whole year! Moving my Mom in a year will be even more difficult with her condition, so all the plans are in motion to move her Tuesday. No one really knows how much more severe the changes will be. Better safe than sorry. ????

my friend had the disease.....he was in his early 70's and went back to the Uk to seek the best medical care he could. That was about 9 months ago

[essox essox]

24 minutes ago, LongTang said:

I don't understand why to insist on this point? The OP has already exposed his story to the world, so he has nothing to lose at this point.

The fact there are so many people whose families been affected by it may actually increase the amount of potential sympathizers.

my mother died from the disease, she was 77, ok this was in England.

My Father and I could not cope with the situation and she was put into care home...lasted about 9 months in there before she passed away....

[graemeaylward]

Dear Bad Spotted Dog, thank you so much for sharing this sad situation with us at such a difficult time for you and your family. Which one of us, faced with a parent with Alzheimer's, or any terminal illness, would not want the best for them. I love Thailand, but sadly, I do find that their is very little human compassion when it comes to situations like this. Immigration, it would appear, are happy to bend the rules when it comes to filling their back pockets, especially through dubious agents, but when it comes to advising and helping those in genuine need, they are strangely silent. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mother as you embark on yet another stressful journey.


Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

[Aussieroaming]

Cheers to you for looking after your mother. Alzheimers is a nihhtmare for the family support team and a bloody horrible illness that steals peoples mental identity. 

[Old Croc]

What happens to the thousands of similar patients in the US who don't have financial support from relatives, and can't travel to a foreign country to get the reasonably priced care their own government should provide?

Are they put out on the street?

 

Thailand can provide this care for these patients at reasonable cost, all that is required is they must meet Immigration's financial requirements to stay long term. No health checks required, just a relatively small "ticket" price for over 50s.  Very generous in my opinion.  

I think your anger would be better directed at your home country that fails to look after it's citizens when they are most in need. 

 

Someone mentioned Australia's health and care system. Try to bring a non-citizen with chronic medical issues into there for long term treatment. They make it very clear the taxpayer doesn't pay for other country's problems.

You have indicated you can get the care needed at a price you can afford in the Philippines. Good luck, I'm sure it will make little difference to her, and you can resume your time in LOS at a later time if desired.

My migration to Thailand was delayed for more than 5 years because of the need to provide assistance/care for my elderly mother.

 

[Proboscis]

23 hours ago, darrendsd said:

Unfortunately everyone has to satisfy the Immigration requirements no matter what their situation is

 

Put the 800K in the bank for her- if you can't afford that then use a agent who will charge you around 20K - if you don't know any agents i'm sure there are people on here who will be happy to supply you one

 

Hope it all works out and good luck

The trouble with using agents in this way means breaking the law. And there is a risk that this will catch up with you. Different if you are a person with no dependents and in full possession of all your faculties. But I can understand the poster who would not want to have her mother with fast disimproving Alzheimers being arrested by Immigration and spending months alone in prison awaiting deportation because she "broke" some rule or other.

[Katipo]

For nearly all of us, no matter how long we are here, we get no more rights than if we were here on holiday. If we want PR, and get it, then things change.... but really, the public services offered by the Gov are not something I would want looking after my loved one.

 

My heart breaks for your Mother, but leaving Thailand is really the best thing for her. I wish her, and you, all the best.

[Baerboxer]

16 hours ago, BadSpottedDog said:

What!? I think you missed some of this. We are paying EIGHTY SIX THOUSAND baht per MONTH for her care, plus meeting our own financial requirements for immigration. 86k per month is way way over the 65k requirement for her, but immigration does not recognize this because it is coming from us and not a foreign source. 

 

Maybe a solution would be to transfer the money to a bank account in Mum's name and then pay for the care from her account. I know it's all the same money at the end of the day but make the paperwork as easy as possible for the IO to understand and tick the box.

[Guest]

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Wish you all the best.

[seancbk]

I completely sympathise with the OP.

My Mum is still in her own home as my Sister and I swore to her we wouldn't put her into a care home.   She's had round the clock live in care now for 4 years at a cost of in excess of 165,000 baht a month.  

Getting old if you end up with Alzheimer's is hugely expensive.  

[Pedrogaz]

Borrow the 800000....or $25000 and leave the money permanently in a savings account here....while you pay off the loan.

[Emdog]

I took care of my demented mom with no help from bro or sis in US til it got to be more than I could handle and hold a job. Found a great adult foster care place, run by Romanian nurse and her family. They were wonderful, had that Eastern European attitude towards family inclusiveness.

That dementia is starting to manifest itself with me. I have a plan. One way ticket to Switzerland... my view is that when I lose my mind, I've lost me.

[phantomfiddler]

It is really sad to see the deterioration in the way that Farangs are now treated by Thai immigration personnel. Do they not realize that we spend much more daily than the average Asian tourist ? and the "You come here too many times already" attitude completely baffles me. Tourists spend money, and should be allowed in (as long as they do not have criminal records) as many times as they wish to come in and spend money ! What is the problem ???

[NotJoeMama]

I brought my mother here 5 years ago with Alzheimer’s and Dementia.  She is 87 now.  It was a wonderful move for her.  Took a while for her to get used to but then she loved just sitting out on the patio in the tropical garden and climate.  It really was perfect.  About 2 years ago,  she fell and broke the ball off the top of her femur.  It’s been very difficult since then.  She is now fully bed-ridden,  24/7.

 

We have a full time live-in caregiver.  Her and my wife take care of my mother.  It’s a lot of work.  We tried and tried to find a good caregiver but all we found was people who didn’t want to work.  And they wanted a ton of money for doing very little because they were a “caregiver”.  Really,  they were just a baby sitter that has to change diapers and cook meals for her but that cut into their “phone time”.  Finally we got my wife’s sister to do the job and it’s been great.

 

It’s certainly put a damper on our lives but I chose that as I didn’t want her in a “facility” in the States that would ignore her.

 

As for the immigration part,  I had an issue.  I put 800K in an account for her just for that reason.  The mistake I made was to put it in both our names as I don’t think she’ll be with us for too much longer.  Immigration said that with 2 names,  I needed 1.6M in that account,  even though I have another account in my name with over 1.6 in it.  Round and round with them, and with some great advice from UbonJoe,  I got her as a dependant on my visa/extension.  No money needed in the bank for her,  no proof of incoming funds.  I will say the immigration office here at first told me there was no such thing and were telling me to take her out of the country (visa run) and start over to get the 3 months of seasoning on the funds.  I showed them pictures of her in the hospital bed in our house (per their request) and they still kept saying that (visa run) was the only way.  Then after arguing to the point they finally realized that I wasn’t able to take her across the border,  they gave in on the dependant visa.  They did make me go to the US consulate to get “proof” she was my mother.  While I did have my birth certificate,  it was not needed as the proof is simply an affidavit they notarize.  Armed with that,  they agreed to the visa.  At the very end,  they said she MUST come in for her picture.  So out of bed,  in a wheel chair with catheter hanging,  we brought her to immigration.  The only good part of all this was I forced them to stay about 20 minutes late since it took so long to get her prepped for the trip.  Topping it off,  there is no wheelchair access at this office.   I made 3 of the workers there come out and help carry her up the stairs.  They did everything they could to make it hard on us and it ended up biting them in the A##.

 

But,  it’s all done and she’s a dependant of me now.  Until they change that rule at least.  I’d bet you could do the same.

 

Best of luck to you with your Mother.  I do completely understand.

[malibukid]

14 hours ago, BadSpottedDog said:

The care in her home country is horrid and unaffordable. It costs $10,000 USD and UP for a 24/7 Alzheimer's patient. And no .. the US government doesn't pay, and no insurance will cover her.
Since she has been in Thailand, she has been SO SO happy. Happier than she has been in many years, and she has not gone "downhill" at all.
So bringing her to Asia has been the best decision I have ever made. My point was that these changes are not well thought through and very short sighted. 

why will Medicare not pay for this?

[malibukid]

14 hours ago, the guest said:

It's sad the USA do not look after its own citizens, must be a terrible place to live.

heartless American people continue to elect dispassionate politicians who are bought and sold by the insurance companies.  sadly America is not a great place to live or get old.  greatest county in the world, BS

Edited May 27, 2019 by malibukid

[cnx101]

18 hours ago, BritTim said:

This is a horrible situation, and it is really sad that you could not find a sympathetic senior immigration official who would work with you to find a solution. Frankly, this is one of those situations where skirting the law using agents seems to me a moral action. For around 20,000 baht a year, you can make all the immigration issues go away. There is a risk, but a small one if you choose the right agent.

Yes and there’s ways around the 400 k in the bank