Getting into a relationship with a bar girl

[thaibeachlovers]

31 minutes ago, brewsterbudgen said:

Anyone in a "relationship" with a working bargirl is a fool if they get upset about her doing her job! 

Don't forget that many bargirls only do it to meet the one that will take her away from all that and give her loadsacash. It's not a "job" as such- just a way to meet rich farangs.

[how241]

10 hours ago, SenorJorge said:

"Relationship" isnt the term you want to use.  Not for prostitutes and even former prostitutes in Thailand.

 

I would go as far to say that any Thai woman who speaks even a moderate amount of English in a farang-dominated area may fall into this category.

 

Your "relationship" isn't a relationship at all, it is a BUSINESS TRANSACTION.  Remember that.  Even if you marry, its a business transaction.  Forever.

Excellent post.  I was thinking of writing something similar but you did it first.  Well done !!!  

[chilli42]

9 hours ago, yogi100 said:

You're not really puzzled you're just trying to have a wind up.. There are thousands of blokes all over the world sending money to these sponging little trollops.

 

I've recently been asked by a good pal of mine to go and make sure for that 'his girl' that he's sending 20,000 B a month to is no longer working in her bar. And he's not a newbie. She's told him she's being a good girl back up in the boondocks working on the family farm.

 

So far I've passed the bar three times and not seen her there. But that does not mean that she's not changed bars, there are hundreds or possibly thousands of bars in Pattaya.

 

He's made the same mistake before but he's not that daft that he would dream of blaming her punters for his own naivety. 

 

If you like the girl carry on seeing her when she can fit you in. Let the idiot know in some way and tell him go and **** himself when he rings you again. What can he do if you and he never meet face to face.

 

She must have somehow let him find your number on her phone so it shows you she could not give a fig about either one of you. You're both just marks, johns or punters along with several others she's probably got on the firm.

 

It'll teach him a lesson not to go to a foreign country, patronise a prostitute then go home and start sending her money in the hope that she'll stop being what she is.

 

Let us know how it transpires. These yarns about lonely lovestruck punters make good reading.

 

 

It's called schadenfreude.

[Scouse123]

9 hours ago, yogi100 said:

You're not really puzzled you're just trying to have a wind up.. There are thousands of blokes all over the world sending money to these sponging little trollops.

 

I've recently been asked by a good pal of mine to go and make sure for that 'his girl' that he's sending 20,000 B a month to is no longer working in her bar. And he's not a newbie. She's told him she's being a good girl back up in the boondocks working on the family farm.

 

So far I've passed the bar three times and not seen her there. But that does not mean that she's not changed bars, there are hundreds or possibly thousands of bars in Pattaya.

 

He's made the same mistake before but he's not that daft that he would dream of blaming her punters for his own naivety. 

 

If you like the girl carry on seeing her when she can fit you in. Let the idiot know in some way and tell him go and **** himself when he rings you again. What can he do if you and he never meet face to face.

 

She must have somehow let him find your number on her phone so it shows you she could not give a fig about either one of you. You're both just marks, johns or punters along with several others she's probably got on the firm.

 

It'll teach him a lesson not to go to a foreign country, patronise a prostitute then go home and start sending her money in the hope that she'll stop being what she is.

 

Let us know how it transpires. These yarns about lonely lovestruck punters make good reading.

 

 

4

 

 

Loved that first line of your post!    ????????????????????

 

It was a great post, but the first line was class!

Edited June 17, 2019 by Scouse123

[ianezy0]

6 hours ago, watcharacters said:

 

Why are these nieve posts so often made by "recently joined members"?

 

Because they like to learn from the older ones who have f'd up in the past ????

[PerkinsCuthbert]

I had a friend thirty years ago, messing around with a cutie, some Brit thought he had exclusive rights and started threatening to come round to my friend's with a baseball bat. The pal came to stay with us a night or two, it blew over. 

[khunPer]

12 hours ago, CharlieH said:

Simple, it's what can happen when the little head takes control, coupled with "pretty woman" syndrome !

 

Ever seen the movie "pretty woman" ? The rich guy "saves" the street girl ! Or White Knight syndrome is another version. You get the idea.

However, in the original script, called "Three Thousand", the rich guy didn't save the street girl at all, but let her out of the car with still three miles to walk home, and her three thousand money he threw in the gutter – the "rich guy" was a bad guy in that story, and with a girlfriend at home, and the street girl was a drug addict – but when Disney took over the movie rights, they wanted the script changed to a family-movie with happy Hollywood end, and renamed it "Pretty Woman".

 

I believe both "Pretty Woman"-versions are available in Thailand, many a bar-girl has become a "good girl" as wife, or long-term girlfriend, in a happy Hollywood-style ending; whilst others are "three thousand" baht – one cannot generalize just because the girl had been working in a bar – and many a good Thai girl can, for that matter, become a nasty gold digger in a relationship; the worst horror stories I know, are all with nice ladies, that never had visited a beer-bar or like...????

[AAArdvark]

I have a hard and fast rule, "never more than twice".  I recently met a girl who claimed that she wanted a serious relationship.  I did some quick calculations and figured that these girls could have had more than a thousand men.  I mentioned that to the girl and she said, with a straight face, that it could be a million.  She told me that I had only been around during low season but during the busy season the girls could do maybe 4 men a night.

I feel sorry for them and the circumstances that brought them to their situation but not sorry enough to overlook a million men.  Than's a million times of some form of deception.

[from the home of CC]

13 hours ago, madmen said:

What happened to newbies first few posts being simple questions like how much is a rub n tug or where is the cheapest beer in pattaya. So much drama coming from newbs 

cause it's all made up bs and many here have too much time on their hands so they make $ for others by responding to all this crap..

[AAArdvark]

8 minutes ago, PerkinsCuthbert said:

I had a friend thirty years ago, messing around with a cutie, some Brit thought he had exclusive rights and started threatening to come round to my friend's with a baseball bat. The pal came to stay with us a night or two, it blew over. 

When I see a girl, that I know, with a customer or someone that looks like a boyfriend, I won't even say hello.

[from the home of CC]

5 pages of responses to someone who probably was paid 1 baht a word to write this crap...

[Skallywag]

No problem having a relationship with a bar girl as long as it ends when you leave town

[Skallywag]

19 minutes ago, AAArdvark said:

I mentioned that to the girl and she said, with a straight face, that it could be a million.

That would be 273 men every day for 10 years....think she may have been exaggerating ????  ????

 

[Dogmatix]

It's extremely selfish and naive of that English bloke to try to limit the girl's income from other customers. That will definitely pee her off.  He will come a cropper very soon.  

[VBF]

33 minutes ago, AAArdvark said:

I have a hard and fast rule, "never more than twice".  I recently met a girl who claimed that she wanted a serious relationship.  I did some quick calculations and figured that these girls could have had more than a thousand men.  I mentioned that to the girl and she said, with a straight face, that it could be a million.  She told me that I had only been around during low season but during the busy season the girls could do maybe 4 men a night.

I feel sorry for them and the circumstances that brought them to their situation but not sorry enough to overlook a million men.  Than's a million times of some form of deception.

Mate of mine calls it Baseball sex........3 bonks and she's out!

[VBF]

12 hours ago, SenorJorge said:

The Doors had a great song about Pattaya and Pattaya girls.. 

 

Maggie M'Gill

 

 

Actually, i'd suggest Hank Thompson - The Wild Side of Life (link) is more apt.....

I didn't know God made honky tonk angels 
I might have known you'd never make a wife 
You gave up the only one that ever loved you 
And went back to the wild side of life

 

Seriously to the OP - unless you're VERY lucky, there's an old saying - "You can take the girl out of the bar, but you cannot take the bar out of the girl"

I think perhaps "English bloke" will discover that in due course.

 

I've got several bargirl friends - as opposed to girlfriends, they're more "friends with benefits" and we all know the score.

Edited June 17, 2019 by VBF

[rumak]

ahhhh,   this is certainly an easier way to kill a half hour before dinner.   who has time to read Private Dancer every day

[Mukdahanman]

8 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

I know two guys who fell in love with these gals. One was a very, very long term freelancer, and one was a bargirl. Basically the same thing. One is happily married, after over a decade. When people ask him what his wife did before they got married, he says she was a bar girl. That takes guts. The other is not happily married. It just depends. But, his wife was way past the 3,000 mark, no doubt. I also know a guy who got together with a massage gal. But, she was young, and had only been working for a few months. It worked out well for them. Personally, I have no issue being with a woman who has been with a few hundred guys. I think many women in the US have been with at least that many. 

 

I am of the opinion that it depends on the amount of time the woman has been doing the work. Of course you cannot ask her. They all have a story. But, for a relatively small amount of money, an intelligent and earnest man can hire a private detective, who can fairly easily look into her background, and see how long she has been in the trade. 

 

I think up to 100-400 customers, and there is a chance she is still fairly together in her head, and capable of a healthy relationship. Over 400 is where you start getting into dicey territory. I have a friend who worked as a bargirl for a few years, then went to Singapore and worked in a brothel. I would estimate her total to be around north of 4,000. She is totally incapable to conducting a healthy relationship. I think beyond a point, the heart becomes callous, and the woman becomes bitter towards all men. It is just natural that this would happen. 

 

It is a risky endeavor. If you can catch them very early, and can verify that, it can work. Otherwise, it is a fraught with risk, and potential disaster. 

Wise words Mike

[SenorJorge]

I was married to one that turned out to be a disaster and the second one completely ruined my life.  Left thailand and my only other best friend in life died within two weeks of getting back.  My life is an aimless pursuit now.  Health a wreck can't do much anyway.  Only one thing is for sure.. No more marriage.  I'll die alone.

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, SenorJorge said:

Left thailand and my only other best friend in life died within two weeks of getting back.

Yeah, my best pal died last week as well.

We've got to that time of life where everyone around us is dying.

 

Doubt I'll die alone, I've surrounded myself with women and children.

Edited June 17, 2019 by BritManToo

[BritManToo]

"I think beyond a point, the heart becomes callous, and the woman becomes bitter towards all men. It is just natural that this would happen. "

 

I always thought that point was age 24, doesn't matter if they were a virgin or a whore, after that age they are incapable of loving any man.

Edited June 17, 2019 by BritManToo

[Mukdahanman]

1 minute ago, BritManToo said:

I always thought that point was age 24, doesn't matter if they were a virgin or a whore, after that age they are incapable of loving any man.

You are replying to someone else’s quote wrongly attributed to me, <deleted> is going on ????

[khunPer]

4 hours ago, VBF said:

Mate of mine calls it Baseball sex........3 bonks and she's out!

Thanks, I heard it as never more than three days, but the expression "Baseball sex" is more fun, and thereby more easy to remember...????

[madmen]

2 minutes ago, Benroon said:

So every thai woman that can speak some English is a prostitute ? All the professors/teachers/engineers/designers - all prostitutes ? Have you any idea how ridiculous that is ?

 

I remember reading somewhere that slurs are not permitted - can't recall a better example than this

'I would go as far to say that any Thai woman who speaks even a moderate amount of English in a farang-dominated area"

Dont be a drama queen. You know exactly what he is saying here

[SenorJorge]

2 minutes ago, Benroon said:

So every thai woman that can speak some English is a prostitute ? All the professors/teachers/engineers/designers - all prostitutes ? Have you any idea how ridiculous that is ?

 

I remember reading somewhere that slurs are not permitted - can't recall a better example than this

 

There aren't many professors, engineers, designers looking for farang husbands on places like Thai Cupid or farang hangouts.  Maybe there's some outliers, but not many.  You read to much into my post.

 

I am saying that if you meet a girl in Pattaya or Sukhumvit between Nana and SCB who speaks great english there's a pretty darn good chance she's not a good girl.  Just on average.  More than average.  Most of the time.  Everyone in their right mind knows that.

 

Anyways, I am done with Thailand.  Moving on to the Phils and India.  I'm not using this forum anymore.. There's no reason for me to.  I won't go back to Thailand so, Luego amigos...

[Traubert]

I have absolutely no hesitation in getting into relationships with bar girls. They can last anywhere from 40 minutes (including shower) to eight hours, maybe nine.

 

She goes home with a fistful of cash, I go for a swim and a coffee.

 

In my opinion, that is the the only sensible relationship anyone can ever have with a bar girl. I love them all, even the fat ones, but I don't want them in my life for more than one night.

 

Isn't that why they are there?

[Scouse123]

3 minutes ago, Traubert said:

I have absolutely no hesitation in getting into relationships with bar girls. They can last anywhere from 40 minutes (including shower) to eight hours, maybe nine.

 

She goes home with a fistful of cash, I go for a swim and a coffee.

 

In my opinion, that is the the only sensible relationship anyone can ever have with a bar girl. I love them all, even the fat ones, but I don't want them in my life for more than one night.

 

Isn't that why they are there?

 

At last, common sense regards bar girls!

[inThailand]

fyi...in LOS she doesn't have to work in a bar to be a bar girl.

[Awinkl]

19 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

It is a risky endeavor. If you can catch them very early, and can verify that, it can work. Otherwise, it is a fraught with risk, and potential disaster. 

It is interesting to watch the Transformation when a Farm-fresh Girl arrives on the scene - and if one watches her progression......through months of working in a Bar.

Not only does her natural beauty & naivety change - with time, but also her demeanor and overall Body-language ... as the "hardening process" set's in!! ...... as they get used to easy money, alcohol and (some) Friends - who lead them down further on the road to destruction. A (local) Thai Boyfriend might fit in there as well.....

And yet, there are the ones that get-out of the drudgery IN TIME, either by finding out that this is not really a life they can cope with - or with the assistance of some (Farang) Saviour - and are able to return to a meaningful Life .... after the BG experience

[madmen]

40 minutes ago, Awinkl said:

IN TIME, either by finding out that this is not really a life they can cope with - or with the assistance of some (Farang) Saviour - and are able to return to a meaningful Life .... after the BG experience

Its usually because they eventually find out they are not pretty enough to make it or they start to loose the looks after 10 years in the game and that would explain why most farang wives/partners are freakin UGLY.