The Thai 'Second' or 'Junior Wife' Phenomena

[luckyluke]

15 minutes ago, Moti24 said:

Where do you live?  Pluto!

I know there are many names for Pattaya. 

I didn't know this one. 

[Thingamabob]

A rather odd post.

 

Men who can afford to take mistresses have done so in all societies all over the world since the beginning of recorded time. Nothing particularly unusual about Thailand in this context.

 

And what I do or don't get up to in my private life remains private.

[Why Me]

3 hours ago, DannyCarlton said:

"And if you are mia noi, most people think it same sopenee." Very untrue, if it were Thai men wouldn't parade their mia noi around in public, like their prized possession. When Thai men visit a "sopenee" they are extremely secretive about it.

 

Quite a disgusting post all round really. Very dissappointing.

Actually Yinn's correct. In fact, mia nois mostly "graduate" from regular sopenee, i.e., aap-op-nuats, gentleman's clubs, pretty. Some rich regular takes a fancy to her and she's sponsored out.

 

And "sopenee" has a social connotation as well. Doesn't matter how rich her bf is, Thais will instantly recognize a woman's street past. LVs and Pradas will help but won't hide it all.

[Davo369]

17 minutes ago, zyphodb said:

Now here's a thought that I haven't seen mentioned, Most Thai wives sleep with their children in the same bed up until a quite late age by western standards yes?...

 So I should imagine that this makes a lot of Thai men pretty fustrated as they can't have sex with their wives

 at night because of children in the bed... Now one solution to this, if you can afford one is to have a Mia noi...

 

  Discuss...

Agree with you, but why not put the kids on the floor. 

THEN blow her doors off

[Muzarella]

It is so common that Thai wives will not believe that its husbands, Thai or Farang, do not cheat them, and it will be jealous even without reasons, and even if you are 30 years older, fat and ugly.

[Stevemercer]

It works in reverse too. Plenty of married Thai women have a boyfriend who they openly socialise with while their husband stays at home.

 

It can be socially embarrassing. I sometimes get confused whether my wife's friends are with their boyfriend or husband and use the wrong name. 

 

Most Thai woman would resent a Mai Noi not least because of possible loss of face and the loss of money from her family.

 

Sometimes married Thai women say they want a falang boyfriend, but I think it is often for altruistic reasons (e.g. to show off to her friends or to gain income to offset losses she doesn't want her husband to know about). 

 

 

Edited December 20, 2019 by Stevemercer

[4MyEgo]

Very happy with just the wife thank you very much, no interest in Mia Nois, or Giks as the wife's policy suits me just fine:

 

1 Enjoy as you only have one life

 

2 Don't tell me unless I ask you

 

3 Don't bring me any diseases

 

4 Never twice with the same girl

 

5 No kissing or going south

 

6 Always come back to me

 

7 Don't leave me for a Katoye

 

8 Always wear protection 

 

On that note, as the famous Lou Costello said, "I'm a bad boy".

 

 

 

[Alex2554]

1 hour ago, Yinn said:

 

 

i surprised people think it ok. 

 

 

[4MyEgo]

2 hours ago, TooBigToFit said:

Thai women and Thai people are often subservient. They are willing to worship evil people so a husband who has sex on the side or even has known girlfriend isn't a big deal. Do what you want and can. Enjoy life. If you can't keep the first one because its a lemon or acts up, dump it.

I find that Thai woman are more open than western woman, and if that means me having fun on the side and my wife knows it, it doesn't mean that she is subservient or worships evil or is after wealth, but respects me having the balls enough to tell her up front before we went further with our relationship, e.g. I love sex, but cannot only have sex with one female, if I feel I need it with other women, then I should have them as I have food to fill my hunger, fortunately for her, I don't get that hungry.....lol

[DannyCarlton]

1 hour ago, Yinn said:

Wrong

Sopanee is same “sex worker”

 

Guree is like say “dirty filthy whore”

 

Have many word. 

 

Ask somebody thai Danny.

There are many words for prostitute in English. Whore is vulgar, prostitute isn't vulgar, but I wouldn't dream of calling someone's mistress a prostitute in the West. More "correct" maybe, but just as insulting.

[DannyCarlton]

1 hour ago, Why Me said:

Actually Yinn's correct. In fact, mia nois mostly "graduate" from regular sopenee, i.e., aap-op-nuats, gentleman's clubs, pretty. Some rich regular takes a fancy to her and she's sponsored out.

Only a very small percentage come through this route. In the Thai gentlemens clubs, the girls may call themselves "prettys" but they primarily sleep with men for money, albeit larger sums. Most mia nois go through the same route as a mistress may do in the West. My wife's husband's mia noi was one of his employees.

[NCC1701A]

I got a house full of Sopenees. They all seem happy to me.

 

They really want the POTY election to be over with, so don't forget to vote for NCC1701A for POTY.     

[yankyoakum]

OK I have only been here 3 months now as retiree but have been married to the Thai lady 43 years and would like to live to see 44 years of marital bliss... Mine told me years ago she would not cut my jewels off, she would remove my head at the neck...She was smiling when she said it but the look in her eyes said don't try it.....think I'll just hang with this one.

[wwest5829]

My Thai girl keeps me happy. And expenses already equal retirement income.

[Yinn]

6 hours ago, Yinn said:

90% are not ok with it.

And if you are mia noi, most people think it same sopenee.

 

54 minutes ago, DannyCarlton said:

There are many words for prostitute in English. Whore is vulgar, prostitute isn't vulgar, but I wouldn't dream of calling someone's mistress a prostitute in the West. More "correct" maybe, but just as insulting.

Maybe my english wrong.

 

i say “most people think it same sopenee.”

Maybe better way

”most women think it similar sopenee”

 

i not mean that a mia noi IS a sopenee.

 

But think it same/similar because they want money, (like a sopenee), they not care the man has a wife (like a sopenee), give sex (like a sopenee).

They want money. No money, they leave.

 

”Good girls” will never be a mia noi. Good girls marry for emotion/love. Normal people.

 

we can disagree, we disagree many time before.

 

[DannyCarlton]

8 minutes ago, Yinn said:

 

Maybe my english wrong.

 

i say “most people think it same sopenee.”

Maybe better way

”most women think it similar sopenee”

 

i not mean that a mia noi IS a sopenee.

 

But think it same/similar because they want money, (like a sopenee), they not care the man has a wife (like a sopenee), give sex (like a sopenee).

They want money. No money, they leave.

 

”Good girls” will never be a mia noi. Good girls marry for emotion/love. Normal people.

 

we can disagree, we disagree many time before.

 

 Maybe it's not as bad as calling someone a "poo ying haa gin" but it's still not a word my wife and her friends would use, even they do know a couple of mia nois.

 

Probably because my wife is baan noak, not pseudo HiSo. She doesn't look down on anyone, not even a mia noi.

Edited December 20, 2019 by DannyCarlton

[DaRoadrunner]

This confirms to me that Thai men are weird. One wife is enough trouble (and expense), who in his right mind would want another?

 

Though I suspect the Thai man sees it as an opportunity to show off that he can get and afford two?

[Dap]

Geezuz! One's enough, eh?

Edited December 20, 2019 by Dap

[Yinn]

22 minutes ago, DannyCarlton said:

 Maybe it's not as bad as calling someone a "poo ying haa gin" but it's still not a word my wife and her friends would use, even they do know a couple of mia nois.

 

Probably because my wife is baan noak, not pseudo HiSo. She doesn't look down on anyone, not even a mia noi.

Yes

Amazing she not care husband go with mia noi. Sure

 

thai woman not all have same brain Danny. 

You say before you wife not like black people. 

Yinn, no problem with black or white. 

 

We are not the same. We are different.

Edited December 20, 2019 by Yinn

[DaRoadrunner]

1 minute ago, Yinn said:

Yes. Amazing she not care husband go with mia noi. Sure

Yinn, why is it some Thai girls accept this and some do not? And why do they go for it? Money, security or ???

[DannyCarlton]

8 minutes ago, Yinn said:

Yes

Amazing she not care husband go with mia noi. Sure

Did I say that?

 

We have a saying in the West, "If you are in a hole, stop digging".

[Yinn]

1 minute ago, DaRoadrunner said:

Yinn, why is it some Thai girls accept this and some do not? And why do they go for it? Money, security or ???

Everyone different. I can not answer. 

 

some girls sopenee also. Why? 

 

Mia noi, maybe 5% is real love, 95% is for money.

 

In different area maybe more than other area. In my area, nobody I know want to be a mia noi, sure. My friend not accept. For what?

 

But does happen everywhere.

I know one woman that husband have mia noi. She not finish with him because she want to keep family together. She more rich than her husband. But love the kid. Embarrassing for her sure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Pilotman]

2 hours ago, Khon Kaen Jeff said:

Just go for it Pilotman, you aint getting any younger and it must be better than coffee mornings with Tarquin and chums?

why do you assume that I haven't already 'gone for it'? You seem to assume quite a lot about me already, why not this situation? 

[Yinn]

4 minutes ago, DannyCarlton said:

Did I say that?

 

No, i wrong. Sorry.

i just read again now. You say she “suicidal”.

 

I mistake. 

[zhounan]

I think I understood that the Wife is a strange object used by Thai men to form a family, to make Mummy, Daddy and all the relatives happy, (obviously for the money of the marriage), to give himself a happy, positive and clean social image - look how fantastic our family is! - 
While the Mia Noi is the one they really want, with whom they have good sex and show off to friends.

My thought is: isn't the Problem at home enough? Do you need to take on another problem?????

However, before coming to Thailand, I hated the problem of prostitution, then I got to know the widespread phenomenon of Mia Noi and totally changed my point of view.
Better prostitutes, at least they have the courage to do what they do and put their face into it. Instead, Mia Nois and their unfaithful husbands in tow are the real scum, and often they are moralists without morals, knew many between university lecturers... - the perfect hiding place for perverts -. 

 

[tgw]

58 minutes ago, Yinn said:

 

 they not care the man has a wife (like a sopenee),

 

this bit is actually a very interesting.

is it about face?

[tgw]

4 minutes ago, zhounan said:

However, before coming to Thailand,

 

where did you grow up?

[Odysseus123]

13 minutes ago, Pilotman said:

why do you assume that I haven't already 'gone for it'? You seem to assume quite a lot about me already, why not this situation? 

Ah,it is safe to assume that every white,western male are all STUDS..buffed to the max..with brains the size of a planet,pleny of crypto-coin in their pockets..and their ears hung low..

 

"Do your ears hang low

Can you tie 'em in a knot

Can you swing 'em over your shoulder

Like a continental soldier..

do your ears hang low?

[Yinn]

1 minute ago, tgw said:

this bit is actually a very interesting.

is it about face?

Maybe misunderstand.

 

The mia noi know that the man have a real wife, but the mia noi not care (because only care about money)

[Why Me]

2 hours ago, DannyCarlton said:

Most mia nois go through the same route as a mistress may do in the West.

You couldn't be more wrong. Class/face is a gulf here. A "respectable professional" woman seen with a married guy in the west would take a bit of "home-wrecker" abuse but not much more. Here she would suffer massive loss of face, especially if she was seen in it for the money, likely ghosted all the way to her FB page, a fate worse than death.

 

2 hours ago, DannyCarlton said:

My wife's husband's mia noi was one of his employees.

Check what she was before being put on the payroll.