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Is it me or do Thai women just not say thank you?


Elizway

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2 hours ago, Canuck1966 said:

One thing people don't get is this:

They don't thank you, they thank Buddha

When you come along the girl believes that Buddha has facilitated the whole thing and you are just the vehicle it arrives in.

They have been praying since kids and you are the fruits of their labour

Remember that and the mindset behind it and you won't go far wrong

Westerners are trained or indoctrinated to say 'thank you' as soon as the infant starts learning the language. Later on saying thank you becomes involuntary response to express gratitude instead of action of cognitive rational judgment. Lot of eastern cultures are similar to that. Instead of being irritated for that, try to educate them. Trust me it takes a long time to get the habit.    

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4 minutes ago, cyril sneer said:

I haven't noticed this, but I have noticed hanging up the phone without saying 'goodbye', and even when i'm still speaking ????

Me also,it’s usually coz I talk a load of .......Hello hello??

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The only time i notice it is when walking on the pavement and you allow a thai person to pass first they never say thanks, which i think is odd. Apart from that i get thanks when i help people out.

 

As for girlfriends and wives, for many it is just a job so may not feel like saying thanks

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2 hours ago, Canuck1966 said:

One thing people don't get is this:

They don't thank you, they thank Buddha

When you come along the girl believes that Buddha has facilitated the whole thing and you are just the vehicle it arrives in.

They have been praying since kids and you are the fruits of their labour

Remember that and the mindset behind it and you won't go far wrong

Another thing people don't get is that someone telling others what they don't get may be

just another way of showing that they don't get that we all have our own ways of getting things

and it might not be what you get.   Get it ?

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3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I did a lot of work on the family home, but none of the family thanked me. When I complained to my wife all she had to say was that they never asked me to to do it.

Much later they did ask me to wire up an new extension they had built, which I did ( I never asked for, nor expected financial reward for what I did ), and did some plumbing work they asked me to do but they still never said thank you. Such a small word, and costs nothing, but never said by them or my wife.

 

Not that it's a purely Thai thing. Few people show any gratitude in my experience.

Yes 'thank yous' are seldom used here that I have noticed.... 

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What I've noticed is a little different: they don't say goodbye when parting or leaving a room the way westerners do. They just turn and walk away, or walk out the door with their minds already somewhere else. 

 

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38 minutes ago, transam said:

Let me start again.......If I am in a queue at any store, I have never heard a local say thank you to staff when given their change, never. .......????

 

Me neither... it is a cultural difference - - in most Western countries we verbalize the thank you... here, it is assumed or offered with a wai. 

 

Also, most will return the "wai" that is offered as thank you - it might even just be a brief lowering of the head... 

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3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Such a small word, and costs nothing, but never said by them or my wife.

 

Not that it's a purely Thai thing. Few people show any gratitude in my experience.

Yeah TBL, I agree. It is a simple small couple of words that do go a lonnnng way. However I think people not saying Thank You goes along with all the entitlement many across the globe have. People have just grown to expect everything and say Thank you very little. The times we live in I suppose

 

My wife is very good about saying Thank You. But that did take some getting used to on her part but she understands the importance of acknowledging when someone has done something for her. 

 

Its clearly not just a "Thai" thing. 

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My Canadian neighbour once said to me

"No matter what level of education, these people are basically "peasants""

Harsh but there's something in that

They are 60 years behind the West.......and will never catch-up.....because the West will continue to move forward 

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 I only get ‘wai’ed at public places when I get the cash from my wallet. I suppose this is the way to ensure that I will finally hand the banknotes to them and also the show of deep respect to the Thai baht.

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3 hours ago, Canuck1966 said:

One thing people don't get is this:

They don't thank you, they thank Buddha

When you come along the girl believes that Buddha has facilitated the whole thing and you are just the vehicle it arrives in.

They have been praying since kids and you are the fruits of their labour

Remember that and the mindset behind it and you won't go far wrong

Classic!   While my girlfriend does thank me, for many things. Still I could just be a gift from Buddha to a devout believer. Obviously she stops in at temples to make merit, and give thanks,  regularly. WooHoo!

 

 

Edited by LomSak27
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10 minutes ago, Zikomat said:

 I only get ‘wai’ed at public places when I get the cash from my wallet. I suppose this is the way to ensure that I will finally hand the banknotes to them and also the show of deep respect to the Thai baht.

Let me ask you this, when you were in your home country and paid for something or service did they always say Thank you?  I doubt it. 

 

I know in the states when I pay a bill for dinner they seldom say Thank You. They look for the tip. In stores where I buy supplies or items seldom does anyone say Thank you. 

 

I guess what I am getting at here, there seem to be a lot of people on TVF that want to make everything Thai exclusive. Not sure why there is that fixation. ????

 

 

 

 

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52 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Depends.

If I hand them less then 1000 b usually they say nothing.

More then 1000 and they will smile and say thank you.

The devil is in the detail ............

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10 minutes ago, robblok said:

I do things because I want to do them not because i expect gratitude. 

right on.   and hopefully the other half feels the same.   very rare   !!   

but if found,  very fortunate .    

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2 hours ago, pgrahmm said:

Please & thank you are used in our house.....In extended family thank you is used a lot more often than any kind of a please = they're more direct....

I've found that most of the Thai gals I'd spent time around used a thank you expression......

My wife from day one up until today....

Our 2 daughters the same = one exhibits real gratitude in her daily living/actions / the other - better check your pockets to see what's left after her thank you = 100% slacker/taker & not easy to be around.....Both raised the same.....1 giver/1 taker.....

I like the sound of 'the other one'! She's my kind of gal! ????

Is she, by any chance, even mildly better looking than the grateful one? Difficult question to answer for a father, of course, but you know where I'm coming from! 

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Its all a matter of choice, you made your choice, why complain about it later, it was after all your choice.

 

If you didnt choose well, fix it or change it, if you cant, get another one, plenty of stock available.

 

Sadly, no refunds though ! ????

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1 hour ago, MaiDong said:

I like the sound of 'the other one'! She's my kind of gal! ????

Is she, by any chance, even mildly better looking than the grateful one? Difficult question to answer for a father, of course, but you know where I'm coming from! 

No, the grateful one could be model material.....Slim build....

The entitled princess syndrome one has a less pretty face & is more curvy and blooming bigly - she'll end up being the one that can never really "find" herself & be an energy sapper/leak for anyone that buys into it.....

There both multi talented but the grateful one has to work hard at it.....The other one doesn't give a sh!t about anything but herself....One of those that never helps but is timely (to the second) to collect a benefit/meal, etc after the work is done....Never a thought to help clean up or stop leaving her mess for everyone else to pick up.....

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I find the opposite, I get embarrassed/ annoyed by the overly profuse ''thank you''s I get from many Thais, even though i realise it is often insincere, it is a formulaic response, like a wai.

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