My wife has threatened to plant drugs in our house and have me caught by the police

[JacChang]

No need. Any proof or evidence you think you may have, that can be used against her, will not result in your favor. From your explanation of things, you are the "good person" in this relationship as she feels the need to rely on threats to get things done. As the "good person" here, we want to work things out and somehow win this argument. But the truth is, when you are working with someone like this, the battles never end. Be the wiser one, make actions on your own, and solve the problem. There is no need for any further arguments with her, do what you can, make new arrangements, protect yourself and your daughter. Move to a new safer place, make all precautions safety-wise to prevent any motives of the wife from succeeding. She was not intelligent enough to act before telling you of the motives, but the scarier part is, what she could be doing without telling you beforehand.

[misterphil]

I used to have a crazy Thai wife like this. She long gone now though.
 

Like some have said.
 

1. Report it and show Police screenshot. 
2. CCTV Its very cheap here and you can get a 4 camera wifi one on Lazada for 3,000 baht, plus a HDD 1,000 baht and a monitor 3,000 baht or just use your TV.  
 

4,000 baht CCTV system which can be accessed from a smart phone. 

[Max69xl]

13 hours ago, nicelee808 said:

Thanks for the replies. My plan is to get my youngest too, he already prefers to be with me and my daughter, it's just before bed he asks for his mum. My kids are all I need in this life, I'm not sure if a custody battle will happen, because I don't think my wife is that interested in having them, but I hope to remain in the house, only I have a salary if that would influence a custody battle. We also have farm land all in her name.

If you're seriously not thinking about a divorce and move out of the house, why do you ask for advise here? 

[kingofthemountain]

On 7/23/2020 at 8:39 AM, nicelee808 said:

I have been married to my wife for 15 years, we have 2 children, we recently split up, my oldest daughter is 12, she is living with me because she hates her mum, my son is 3 and with his mother for now. Me and my daughter live in the family house which is in my wife's name, my wife is at her mum's. I am a teacher with non B visa and work permit my wife doesn't have a job. There has been a lot of arguing between me and my wife and my wife and daughter,...

 

Any advice appreciated. 

 

''My kids are all I need in this life, I'm not sure if a custody battle will happen, because I don't think my wife is that interested in having them, but I hope to remain in the house, only I have a salary if that would influence a custody battle. We also have farm land all in her name.''

Hi

for me the main problem is as usual in Thailand ALL is in your wife name

then when you split up, like you do, you stay with nothing including the right to 

stay in HER house, And it's the origin of the problem, let me give you her point of view about it

you are not anymore with her but still you stay in HER house, then don't be surprised if she is

trying any way she can to make you move out of HER house.

Don't wait a bad thing happen, in your interest my advice is move to another location

NOW

 

And imo you shouldn't involve like you do the children in your fight

whith their mom, the worst thing for a child is to have to chose between

one of his parents, You and your wife (Maybe it's time to oficialize she is 

your ex wife? Why you haven't divorced yet?) are and stay the 2 parents

of the children forever, you can not change this fact, then act in the interest

of the children, not in the search of more partners at your side in your personal fight

 

good luck

Edited July 24, 2020 by kingofthemountain

[rumak]

20 minutes ago, Berkshire said:

What if the police decided to do "something?"  If I was the police and someone came to me with such a complaint, the first thing I'd do is contact the woman to get her side of the story.  Then of course, all hell will break loose.  If the OP is ready to deal with that, by all means, go for it.

Once, just once,  i went to the local tourist police because I had a problem with Farang and his thai gf.

When the cop came , the farang was gone and the cop ignored me and started talking to the thai gf.

My thai is very good but he did not want to hear a word i said.   Last time i ever took that route.

 

Now, all my other dealings with regular thai cops ( usually routine traffic stops) have been no issue at all and I usually defend (on TV)  their polite and fair actions in those situations.   But getting them involved domestically might ,  as Bershire suggests,  not go as planned.  

 

Good recommendations by TV members are usually the ones advocating avoidance and flight/departure

if necessary.    Its just too much of a cr*p shoot to get involved in confrontations .  We do have some

keyboard warriors here though ,  usually bragging about how they threw the 10 baht at the driver and

told him where to go.    

 

[chrissloan58]

I have had a similar situation. You have no chance. Who are the police going to believe you an alien or a Thai woman. The best you can do is leave , take everything you can and leave no forwarding address. I have personally been done down that road and for a faranag it does not end well. You have no one to defend you against a Thai female. if you want details PM me  

[Ireland32]

IF she accuses you and they make you <deleted> test. , they will not test her . Whoever reports first Wins, Happened to me last year it’s a joke “Bad Foreigner”, it was Ganja thing she planted and a Dutch ex friend initials S.S. and her reported me , Dutch guy trying to get me Blacklist for a dirty motorbike deal , they would not test them , Ridiculous  their plan didn’t work , but I got 5 days 2 year probation 

Edited July 24, 2020 by Ireland32

[Burma Bill]

On 7/23/2020 at 8:51 AM, robblok said:

Maybe go to the police to have this on the record.

As a former volunteer, may I suggest you call in to your nearest Tourist Police Station in the first instance to seek advice before going to your local police. The TP has a free call number 1155.

[n00dle]

seems to me that your wife has given you excellent grounds to file for divorce and custody. report, document take it to family court,

 

no income, history of drug use and demonstrated instability. probably wouldnt hurt to see if you could get her tested in some way, given the nature of the threat its likely she is using.

get out in front of it, you will regret it if you dont.

 

Edited July 24, 2020 by n00dle

[spidermike007]

Set up CCTV around the house or move. Do not let her know where you moved to. Either option works. 

 

Don't be a pawn to a fool. And get divorced if you have not done so already. 

[Surelynot]

SOUNDS A REAL KEEPER

[Bender Rodriguez]

On 7/23/2020 at 8:51 AM, robblok said:

Then at least you got proof.

 

Maybe you should find an other house for you and your daughter and not let your wife in ?

 

Maybe go to the police to have this on the record. 

 

It certainly is a bad situation. 

rob rob ... you don't know how police works overhere... don't care ... family problem, not ours...

 

my ex wife was the VIOLENT one, physical against me, abusive against my child, she attacked me twice with a KNIFE, she went later to the police to pretend I was the violent one... 

 

[Bender Rodriguez]

6 hours ago, pacovl46 said:

plus you’ll probably get sole custody for the kids as well. Win win situation for you! 

ignorance is a bliss on TVF

 

sole custody, only 2 options :

 

1) you pay your ex to buy the kids from her, on paper

2) she beats a child into the hospital under her custody and is charged for child abuse in court

 

thai court NEVER give sole custody unless 1 or 2

 

I consulted 10-20 lawyers for this ... most will ask you $$$$$ to try, yeah, easy money

only a few said:  no chance getting sole custody expect above exceptions ...

 

I speak out of experience

 

happily divorced, peace came back to the house, once the RAT was out

[tifino]

go to the Police Before she does...

 - they always tend to follow who Reports First...

[Bender Rodriguez]

4 hours ago, ChipButty said:

Not as easy as you think, Yes you can put the house in the kids name but you cannot sell it until they are 18 years old correct me if im wrong

wrong & wrong

 

only the owner can put the kids name on the chanote, IF she wants & pay for it

 

adulthood is 20 in thailand, not 18

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, kingofthemountain said:

Hi

for me the main problem is as usual in Thailand ALL is in your wife name

then when you split up, like you do, you stay with nothing including the right to 

stay in HER house, And it's the origin of the problem, let me give you her point of view about it

you are not anymore with her but still you stay in HER house, then don't be surprised if she is

trying any way she can to make you move out of HER house.

I managed to avoid this problem, by letting my wife buy a house with a 90% mortgage.

She couldn't possibly make the repayments, so I get to live there with the kids.

Buying a house in her name for cash is a mugs game.

[Bender Rodriguez]

3 hours ago, ICELANDMAN said:

I think the police will make no report having no proof to prove, installing video cameras inside and outside the house and changing the lock and its only defense and divorce.

he can go to jail for changing the locks on a property he does not own

[johnray]

You married a drug addict.  So funny.

 

Don't marry something that has either a drawing on their face or a harmful addition.

[Bender Rodriguez]

3 minutes ago, johnray said:

You married a drug addict.  So funny.

 

Don't marry something that has either a drawing on their face or a harmful addition.

and your reply is useful how ? can't change the past, we are talking about HIS FUTURE with his children

[robblok]

43 minutes ago, Bender Rodriguez said:

rob rob ... you don't know how police works overhere... don't care ... family problem, not ours...

 

my ex wife was the VIOLENT one, physical against me, abusive against my child, she attacked me twice with a KNIFE, she went later to the police to pretend I was the violent one... 

 

I do know how the police works, and indeed they might not be interested but you can still get this on the record.

 

In your case you had no real proof, (unless you had it on video). Then of course they don't believe you. 

[Bender Rodriguez]

46 minutes ago, robblok said:

I do know how the police works, and indeed they might not be interested but you can still get this on the record.

 

In your case you had no real proof, (unless you had it on video). Then of course they don't believe you. 

 

since when does the local BIB speak any ENGLISH, that you can go report ?

 

my ex also have magical powers to tell her side of the story to everybody and they all believe it blindly

 

even when her own children say she is lying, as usual...

 

but a narcissist is convincing, even in believing her own lies for truth

 

 

[NotYourBusiness]

4 hours ago, Berkshire said:

What if the police decided to do "something?"  If I was the police and someone came to me with such a complaint, the first thing I'd do is contact the woman to get her side of the story.  Then of course, all hell will break loose.  If the OP is ready to deal with that, by all means, go for it.

Nope, that's not how it works. The police don't actually care until a crime has been committed, which it hasn't. They are not a court, they are not trying to figure out who is lying, they don't care. Nothing of the sort. They will write down whatever you say. It is your REPORT. They will give you a COPY, they keep the original for verification any time at a later date. That's it!

 

Of course, if you LIE, that could trigger your own set of problems. So don't LIE.

Edited July 24, 2020 by NotYourBusiness

[Berkshire]

15 minutes ago, NotYourBusiness said:

Nope, that's not how it works. The police don't actually care until a crime has been committed, which it hasn't. They are not a court, they are not trying to figure out who is lying, they don't care. Nothing of the sort. They will write down whatever you say. It is your REPORT. They will give you a COPY, they keep the original for verification any time at a later date. That's it!

 

Of course, if you LIE, that will trigger your own set of problems. So don't LIE.

Interesting.  Assume you're talking about Thailand and not your home country. 

 

So in this case, you believe he can file a police report because he has the text message evidence.  What if she just made a verbal statement, no text message, would he still be able to file a report?  

[NotYourBusiness]

21 minutes ago, Berkshire said:

Interesting.  Assume you're talking about Thailand and not your home country. 

 

So in this case, you believe he can file a police report because he has the text message evidence.  What if she just made a verbal statement, no text message, would he still be able to file a report?  

Yes sir, I am talking about Thailand. And YES I have made police reports about people threatening me with no proof. It is strictly "he said, she said". But it doesn't matter. It is YOUR REPORT. You are only trying to establish a pattern for any FUTURE problems (in other words, an actual crime, like drugs being found). The police will write down what you say, and give you a copy. Then you show that to her, and you have just cut her legs off. She was a drug addict, she is MUCH more afraid of the police than he is. There will NEVER be another threat to plant drugs from her, guaranteed.

Edited July 24, 2020 by NotYourBusiness

[The Theory]

Does she have violence history of any kind ? If yes, I would not stay in that house if I were you. 

[HandsomeTallFarang]

Her own daughter hates her?

 

why did you marry such an insufferable harpy? D’oh!

[brianthainess]

Not read all but a Thai girl in revenge tried that on me once, saying she would call the cops on me for having ganga (many years ago now) i offered her my phone saying OK call them and I'll tell them YOU sold it to me, that was the end of that. Saw her once in the street and she wai me.

[Thingamabob]

Strongly suggest you make every effort to calm things down. Confrontations like this don't end well here. 

[SePl]

15 years and ou still argue ?

 

2 weeks after i know them I already know that it's useless to even speak to them !

 

 

[bwpage3]

Your wife doesn't work.

 

Where is she getting the money for the drugs?

 

And you are a school teacher? Do you have another source of income?

 

If not, paying for a lawyer is probably out of the question.

 

She is doing drugs, she knows the dealers. Dealers are not nice people.

 

Be careful who you can trust.