Humorous Signs, Pics, Vids etc (2021)

[canthai55]

[canthai55]

[CharlieH]

[chickenslegs]

[canthai55]

[chickenslegs]

[canthai55]

[canthai55]

[rcuthbert]

[canthai55]

[canthai55]

[canthai55]

[bobandyson]

 

I wish all reporters were like this guy.

 

 

 

[bobandyson]

 

 

 

[canthai55]

Roger and his wife have been married for 22 years.

Roger had gone out and when he came home his wife told him she had some questions for him.

He said okay.

She said she found the key to his safe and opened it.

They walked over to the safe and examined it's contents. A large stack of cash and three eggs.

His wife asked what the eggs were for?

He said that every time he had sex with another woman he collected an egg from the neighbor and saved it. He had always been honest with her.

She thought about it and said "that's not so bad. Three times in 22 years."

Roger said " when I collect a dozen I sell them and save the cash".

 

 

[codemonkey]

[AlfHuy]

12 minutes ago, codemonkey said:

Nice. You upgraded your guest toilet?

[rcuthbert]

I surmise that the 1950's nick name for a particular protuberance was different from it's present-day equivalent. 

(I can't remember where I got the jpg from - if it was from this topic, then credit to OP.)

[AlfHuy]

5 minutes ago, rcuthbert said:

I surmise that the 1950's nick name for a particular protuberance was different from it's present-day equivalent. 

(I can't remember where I got the jpg from - if it was from this topic, then credit to OP.)

I know her.

[canthai55]

[canthai55]

[norfolkandchance]

[VocalNeal]

On 4/29/2021 at 2:20 PM, canthai55 said:

 

Well that's set me up for the rest of the day.

[Kelsall]

[canthai55]

PARKING TICKET: My wife and I went into town and visited a shop. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and I said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?" He just ignored us and continued writing the ticket.

I called him an "a**hole." He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn-out tires.

So my wife called him a "s*ithead." He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing more tickets.

This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote. He finally finished, sneered at us and walked away. Just then our bus arrived, and we got on it and went home.

We always look for cars with Justin Trudeau stickers. We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's so important at our age!

[canthai55]

[canthai55]

[bobandyson]

Haven't seen acts like this for a long time.

 

 

[chickenslegs]

 

[canthai55]

One morning a husband returns to the cabin after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out, since it is such a beautiful day. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says," Good morning, Ma'am, what are you doing"?

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious"?)

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.

"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. I'll have to write you up a ticket."

"For reading a book"? she replies.

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her again.

"But officer, I'm not fishing, I'm reading."

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to write you up a ticket and you'll have to pay a fine."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the Game Warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am," and he immediately departed.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

Sure God created man before woman. But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece!!