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Would you ever marry a bar girl? If so, why?


bob smith

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On 8/5/2023 at 8:46 AM, marin said:

Not to sure about this as one of your first threads was how you took a "girl" to Koh Chang and were shocked she expected to get paid. Not only that but for you were genuinely surprised at the predicament you had gotten yourself in.  By the way, when did "Mrs" Smith come along?

Missus did the photography?

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16 hours ago, Hummin said:

As much as being a sexual partner, friendship is important, and being a friend with a woman, takes effort and interest in each other sharing daily life and make the best out of what you build together, and also share interests. A marriage or any relationships takes effort and work to maintain. 

While I don't disagree about friendship in a relationship, I don't know many that didn't get divorced, and it seems to me that they don't stay together for friendship.

I thought I was friends with my first partner, but it didn't stop her ripping me off when I left her. I think she saw a soft touch after her abusive husband and the "friendship" was more about stringing me along.

Anyway, real friends are few and far between and if we had to be friends with the person we marry most might never do so.

 

 

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16 hours ago, Hummin said:

If I could not perform anymore, Im not sure I would be interested at all, and it takes a passionate partner to manage to turn on a partner right. Im not there yet, and if so happens the other way, she is not interested anymore, then I would think about my options without leaving her, afterall she is my best friend, and the one I like to spend my time with. 

 

 

If she is your friend you are a lucky man and a rarity.

 

Why should it be your responsibility to turn her on every time? Does she only want sex if you make the moves? Why isn't it up to her to turn you on too?

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On 8/5/2023 at 8:46 AM, bob smith said:

mrs smith has never asked me for a single penny. in fact, quite the oposite, she pays 80% of the time we go out..

 

Amazing what you can find when you open your eyes a bit, isnt it? ???? 

With that wisdom, maybe it´s time for you to open them, Bob.

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Not a chance.

 

Once a whore, always a whore I'm afraid.

 

A friend of mine married a gal he met in a "Turma" in Brazil. That's a Brazilian bathhouse/brothel.

 

Beautiful, charming young lady. Half his age. 

 

It didn't end well. She cheated on him with at least a couple of guys he knew about. He finally ended it.

 

This was a guy with money, good looks, success. He could have done so much better.

 

My theory is, despite the fact that many of these women are nice and charming, that once you sell your body that part of you dies inside. So for that person to make a good long term wife isn't a good expectation at all.

 

In the end they will go for the money again.

 

And my friend lost everything in the US financial crisis. After that she changed. She didn't have a free run on his AX card anymore.

 

Let's face it, in the end they're all whores in one way or another. We pay for it or pay for it.

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5 minutes ago, Nickcage49 said:

A friend of mine married a gal he met in a "Turma" in Brazil. That's a Brazilian bathhouse/brothel.

Beautiful, charming young lady. Half his age. 

It didn't end well. She cheated on him with at least a couple of guys he knew about. He finally ended it.

Newsflash ......... they all cheat, even my educated Christian Brit virgin from a good family cheated on me!

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21 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

The most important thing a woman wants, besides being able to trust their partner, is to be heard.

I've always found they want a big house, new car and money to spend.

No woman is ever satisfied, as you found with your 3 mentally ill women, so why make any effort at all?

 

Who would listen to a guy with invisible friends and mentally ill wives?

Your entire life is a fantasy!

Edited by BritManToo
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Just now, BritManToo said:

I've always found they want a big house, new car and money to spend.

No woman is ever satisfied, as you found with your 3 mentally ill women, so why make any effort at all?

True

House

Car

Money

Holidays

 

How bout man does what he wants ie budget travel woman comes along or pisses off.

 

Women will manipulate men no end

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22 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

You reckon his kids will just turn up in Thailand and wander around asking people if they know Mr Soandso?

I doubt he's given them his address or phone number.

My oldest Brit daughter did turn up in Chiang Mai looking for me a few years back.

She wanted to meet for coffee, but I blocked her from my email and didn't reply.

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21 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

My oldest Brit daughter did turn up in Chiang Mai looking for me a few years back.

She wanted to meet for coffee, but I blocked her from my email and didn't reply.

I can only hope this is another fib, why would you not want to meet up? 

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1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

I've always found they want a big house, new car and money to spend.

No woman is ever satisfied, as you found with your 3 mentally ill women, so why make any effort at all?

 

Who would listen to a guy with invisible friends and mentally ill wives?

Your entire life is a fantasy!

You assume a lot, meaning you aren't very bright. We all have seen what you've said about your kids and wife. Maybe you were the reason she left and didn't want you to contact them, although she can't stop that anyway unless you did them harm. Don't try and BS someone who knows. Plenty of women are satisfied if they aren't damaged by other men or their parents while young. Plenty of women aren't greedy and need big houses to show off to people who really aren't their friends. Plenty of women respond to their partner actually listening to them and stay because they are moral thinkers that believe in a commitment. All wives aren't whores. Only women who sell their bodies are. All women are not transactions. That's your thinking because you purchase yours and maybe didn't treat your Christian wife right. What you said that was true, which is a small part of your replies to myself and others, is that mentally ill women are never satisfied, as depression and narcissism wreaks havoc on the human brain, and they find it hard, or impossible, to interact with others in personal relationships. As far as invisible friends, I have no idea how someone who has never met someone else can make such a moronic statement. I have hundreds of friends in 3 countries and all over the US. I treat them right also, and they return in kind. With your background, you really have no reason to get involved with others here, as they know the real you, shown from what you've been saying for years. I gave you advice about your kids, that you should contact them, but before that you said you didn't want to have a relationship with them. That's normal thinking? And you can comment on someone else who loves all of his children and talks to them weekly? I don't fantasize my life. I just take it as it comes.

Edited by fredwiggy
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45 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Newsflash ......... they all cheat, even my educated Christian Brit virgin from a good family cheated on me!

Women cheat because they were not brought up right by parents, and didn't have a good relationship with their fathers. They also cheat because they have been with too many men, as is the case with many bar girls, and they don't look at men as anything besides cash. Statistically, about 25% of married women cheat. hardly all.

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13 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Women cheat because they were not brought up right by parents, and didn't have a good relationship with their fathers. They also cheat because they have been with too many men, as is the case with many bar girls, and they don't look at men as anything besides cash. Statistically, about 25% of married women cheat. hardly all.

And men cheat because...?

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1 hour ago, Nickcage49 said:

Let's face it, in the end they're all whores in one way or another.

yes, but your Phd thesis on dating is flawed and contradictory.

if "they're all whores", as you claim, then what difference does it make if you marry a hooker or not?

don't answer it. it's a rhetorical/trick question. 

 

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2 minutes ago, brewsterbudgen said:

And men cheat because...?

Low self esteem, anger, a desire for conquests to feed ego. Sexual needs not fulfilled, sometimes because they weren't treating their partners with love and respect, sometimes because their wives only married because of his money, sometimes because they are damaged goods. Immaturity and the need for variety, thinking they somehow deserve it.

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51 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Plenty of women are satisfied if they aren't damaged by other men or their parents while young. Plenty of women aren't greedy and need big houses to show off to people who really aren't their friends.

You haven't managed to find one though.

Despite repeated attempts and failures.

Edited by BritManToo
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Just now, BritManToo said:

You haven't manage to find one though.

Despite repeated attempts and failures.

How do you know what I've found? Besides that, do you not know that finding a good partner is not only the most important thing a person can do, but also the hardest? Most women will never find a good, loyal, faithful, trustworthy, kind, considerate and non abusive man. Having a relationship end is not always a failure. It can be that they had different future goals in life, so needed to split before things got too involved. It's also not a failure if the other partner cheated on you or was abusive or money hungry. That's a failure in their lives, and it's not worth staying with that kind, as it only brings you down.

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55 minutes ago, EVENKEEL said:

I can only hope this is another fib, why would you not want to meet up? 

She sided with her mother during the divorce.

I don't have much time for anyone I felt betrayed me.

Too much forgive and forget amongst the 'soft lads' on this forum.

Never forgive! Never forget!

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Just now, BritManToo said:

She sided with her mother during the divorce.

I don't have much time for anyone I felt betrayed me.

Too much forgive and forget amongst the 'soft lads' on this forum.

Never forgive! Never forget!

Kids always take sides in a divorce, and that's what hurts them. Your child didn't betray you. We don't know what you did with your wife but again, if you didn't do harm to your children, they will still want a relationship with you eventually. Some take quite awhile to get over the anger a divorce causes, and sometimes they take the side they most relate to, and that in turn hurts them also. I don't understand what you mean when you say "soft lads". I'm guessing it means we forgive too easily. If you don't forgive, you keep the hurt in you. The other party you hate has no idea nor  care what you're thinking. People don't forget what others do to them. You just deal with it and move on, because they can't hurt you anymore. No matter what the other side says about you, unless that child is so close minded she can't act, she will still want to know the other side's story. If you hurt their mom, I understand why they might not want to talk with you, but anyone can apologize and admit wrong. Then you can have a relationship with them. Why bring kids into this world if you don't want a relationship with them? Better to use a condom or birth control.

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10 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Never forget!

If you never forget, it will eat you up inside and interfere with future relationships.

how long ago did you get divorced?

if I were you, I would enlist the help of a psychologist to help you get over it and move on. 

 

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3 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

If you never forget, it will eat you up inside and interfere with future relationships.

how long ago did you get divorced?

if I were you, I would enlist the help of a psychologist to help you get over it and move on. 

 

No need, I'll be dead soon, doubt I have 5 years left in me.

I've already outlived all but one of my pals.

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4 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

My God says not.

Who's your God? I know you don't believe in the God, so I'm guessing it might be one of the many statues or perhaps a tree? If it is God, then using birth control in your case I'm sure he wouldn't mind, as he believes in family, and that means being in contact with and loving them, no matter how far away they are, and since he knows your heart, he knows you don't want anything to do with the kids you made previously. We know, by what you've said here, that you have a Thai child that you've helped with school. Why concentrate on this one and neglect the others? Aren't they worth as much?

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11 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Who's your God? I know you don't believe in the God, so I'm guessing it might be one of the many statues or perhaps a tree? If it is God, then using birth control in your case I'm sure he wouldn't mind, as he believes in family, and that means being in contact with and loving them, no matter how far away they are, and since he knows your heart, he knows you don't want anything to do with the kids you made previously. We know, by what you've said here, that you have a Thai child that you've helped with school. Why concentrate on this one and neglect the others? Aren't they worth as much?

It's interesting that you profess to believe in god, but break many of his rules.

And I claim to not believe in God, but follow all his rules (apart from keeping the sabbath).

9 out of 10 ain't bad IMHO.

 

I see 'honour your father and mother', which I did.

But nothing about loving your children.

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29 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

She sided with her mother during the divorce.

I don't have much time for anyone I felt betrayed me.

Too much forgive and forget amongst the 'soft lads' on this forum.

Never forgive! Never forget!

Hate is a terrible thing to carry long term. Does you no good.

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3 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

It's interesting that you profess to believe in god, but break many of his rules.

And I claim to not believe in God, but follow all his rules (apart from keeping the sabbath).

 

I see 'honour your father and mother', which I did.

But nothing about loving your children.

How do you know what rules I break? Getting married again because I left someone who betrayed me of course was my choice, and staying with someone addicted to pain pills and acting accordingly isn't a good thing either. Maybe I should have stayed, maybe not. God doesn't want us to be miserable , even if we make bad choices out of attraction. No excuses from me, just the way I chose to go. God has rules that all make sense, but not loving your children I'm sure he frowns upon. Again, if you don't want to raise kids, nor love them, don't have any. The world is filled with millions of fatherless children who go astray and hurt others. It's hard enough trying to raise a child in this world right especially if your kids have peers who are damaged from their parents.

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Just now, EVENKEEL said:

Hate is a terrible thing to carry long term. Does you no good.

I don't hate anyone, but I do prefer to avoid all confrontation, which is not the same.

Meeting my former kids would invariably give rise to confrontation.

 

Back on topic 'would you ever marry a bar girl'

Yes I would, yes I did, and it's been great (so far).

 

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5 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

How do you know what rules I break? Getting married again because I left someone who betrayed me of course was my choice

Mortal sin ..........no chance of heaven for you.

Using condoms/contraception also a mortal sin, "thou shall not kill".

 

So that's two 'mortal sins' you've confessed to on this page of this thread.

Edited by BritManToo
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