Lady takes man to Loy Khratong - implications?

[henrik2000]

Hello,

 

• Does it have a special meaning when a single lady makes a Khratong (miniature boat) for a single man and he floats it? Can my willingness to join this plan cause inconveniences? I would like to stay single and just friendly with that lady.
• Is there anything I could or should bring for her in return? I want to invite her for dinner, drink and/or live music after the temple, but I'm not sure she's up for it. 

 

Background: I had asked my longtime Jomtien waitress for a good spot to observe the Loy Khratong doings. She suggested a certain temple, and after a little while she said: She would make a Khratong for me and I should come to her restaurant at 10:00 p.m. closure time. Then we could visit the temple together and I (not she) could float her Khratong; the temple would be busy even after 10:00 p.m.; her Thai boss (married to someone else) nodded at this. Before that, she said, I could also watch Loy Khratong on the beach while she was working.

I know that lady only as a longtime repeat customer in her resto, with the occasional small talk about life partners, kids, whereabouts, rainy season. She is 50, has almost no English (I have a little Thai) and obviously very little foreigner exposure; the resto is not in a nightlife area and serves no  tourist food. She might not even know much about the nightlife scene.

 

I guess seen from outside she and me would make a suitable match. I like her, because she is super-smiley, caring and cute, but I have no further designs. I would enjoy going out with this friendly local lady and see Loy Khratong from a local point of view - if there is no punishment and no disappointment. We should say goodbye at the temple, at the restaurant after the temple or at the latest at her doorstep, if she likes to be safeguarded to her doorstep.

 

I wondered if Loy Khratong is (not traditionally, but in everyday practice) a couple's thing. I have observed Loy Khratong so far only once at Bangkok's Phra Athit, and it seemed to be only couples and very romantic. 

 

–

 

This question is meant seriously and I'd welcome especially non-cynical replies. I should have posted it earlier, but lost sight of this forum in the days it was not available recently.

 

Thanks 🕯️

 

Edited November 27, 2023 by henrik2000

[Swiss1960]

When a Thai lady asks you to go out with her, be this Loi Krathong, firewall festival or any other event, then yes, it means something to her. In Thai culture, the ladies are not the one to ask

[henrik2000]

15 minutes ago, Swiss1960 said:

firewall festival

Nice auto correction...

 

Thanks for your thoughts.

Edited November 27, 2023 by henrik2000

[Mavideol]

what would you do if she asks you to look over her bag

 

Would YOU watch HIS bag on the beach?

Rate this topic

---

By henrik2000
13 minutes ago in Pattaya

[bunnydrops]

I would go and not try and read too much into it. Yes, she does sound like she wants to get to know you better and maybe you would like to know her better. Just go, and after say "Thank you" and part ways.

[PeterCouling]

While couples are most likely to float a Krathong together it has no real meaning when you float one with a stranger. The likelihood is she has no-one in her life and wants to have someone with her when she floats her Krathong. Just be polite, enjoy the festival in the spirit of it and make sure she is safe when you part.

[Gottfrid]

Mostly people want things. However, when it concerns other people and people to people connections in various way, there are always 2 parts deciding, if not gang bang or threesome. She might very well be interested in you, but she might also only want company for the specific occasion.

 

You are the one that decides how the night will end for you. If she agrees to sleep with you, then so be it. If you wish to sleep with her and she says no, then just try another one. Same as you say, if you just want to float a kratong, and go out eat with her. Go for it. It´s not like you can´t say no, and she will rape the man out of you.

[LS24]

1 hour ago, Swiss1960 said:

When a Thai lady asks you to go out with her, be this Loi Krathong, firewall festival or any other event, then yes, it means something to her. In Thai culture, the ladies are not the one to ask

Agree. And as someone else mentioned, maybe she just wants some company for the occasion. You can just it clear that you are friends only as you would in the west. Just let her down gently.

 

I find Thai woman still do little sweet gestured things when they like a guy. I always find that touching knees with you or upper thighs or lower leg a very sweet gesture that even adult mature Thai women use as a cue to tell you that they like you.

[Chris Daley]

It means you are an ATM.  This is signified by the boat being floated and is a special day in Thai culture also the women never ask first.

 

Get ready to pay some bills.

Edited November 27, 2023 by Chris Daley

[Bobthegimp]

I was asked by 2 women earlier today and posted the same question in another area of the forum.  Did you go?  I decided not to. 

[hotchilli]

19 hours ago, henrik2000 said:

Does it have a special meaning when a single lady makes a Khratong (miniature boat) for a single man and he floats it? Can my willingness to join this plan cause inconveniences? I would like to stay single and just friendly with that lady

Tell her your intentions...  be honest.

[Expat68]

She has obviously got designs on you, best to be honest with her

[neeray]

I think it means that you "float her boat". In other words, she has a shine for you but you've never made any advance so she's taking matters in hand.

[Ralf001]

How'd ya go Henrik... get ya end wet ?

[swm59nj]

I wouldn’t think anything of it.  Unless she appears to try to pursue you. 

[neeray]

One of the best Thai relationships that I ever experienced was with a lovely lady who came to me on TF. She was looking for a wholesome relationship, not a walking/talking ATM machine. She would never spend my money, in fact sometimes she wouldn't order what I knew she really craved at a restaurant, as she thought it was too expensive. We spent most of my trips together but eventually we drifted apart.

 

As it relates to the OP's question, she sounds like a quality gal looking for a wholesome relationship. He might be wise to accept her offer and see if the attraction by both is still existent, outside of the confines of her workplace.

[ignore it]

Be carefull !

Overthinking can lead to depression. 

 

[paulbrow]

FWIW, I've been in Thailand for a longtime.  Despite what all the cynics here think, there are a lot of good, genuine people here. Personally, I think she wants to help you experience the event. She may want more deep inside but doesn't expect more. I've always found Loy Krathong a very personal event and is a simple way to let one's troubles float away. She'll enjoy a little time with you and be happy if you mutually enjoy the time. Personally, I do not believe every Thai woman is out to get you and / or your money. Just to have a foreign friend is more than enough.

[charleskerins]

23 hours ago, henrik2000 said:

Hello,

 

• Does it have a special meaning when a single lady makes a Khratong (miniature boat) for a single man and he floats it? Can my willingness to join this plan cause inconveniences? I would like to stay single and just friendly with that lady.
• Is there anything I could or should bring for her in return? I want to invite her for dinner, drink and/or live music after the temple, but I'm not sure she's up for it. 

 

Background: I had asked my longtime Jomtien waitress for a good spot to observe the Loy Khratong doings. She suggested a certain temple, and after a little while she said: She would make a Khratong for me and I should come to her restaurant at 10:00 p.m. closure time. Then we could visit the temple together and I (not she) could float her Khratong; the temple would be busy even after 10:00 p.m.; her Thai boss (married to someone else) nodded at this. Before that, she said, I could also watch Loy Khratong on the beach while she was working.

I know that lady only as a longtime repeat customer in her resto, with the occasional small talk about life partners, kids, whereabouts, rainy season. She is 50, has almost no English (I have a little Thai) and obviously very little foreigner exposure; the resto is not in a nightlife area and serves no  tourist food. She might not even know much about the nightlife scene.

 

I guess seen from outside she and me would make a suitable match. I like her, because she is super-smiley, caring and cute, but I have no further designs. I would enjoy going out with this friendly local lady and see Loy Khratong from a local point of view - if there is no punishment and no disappointment. We should say goodbye at the temple, at the restaurant after the temple or at the latest at her doorstep, if she likes to be safeguarded to her doorstep.

 

I wondered if Loy Khratong is (not traditionally, but in everyday practice) a couple's thing. I have observed Loy Khratong so far only once at Bangkok's Phra Athit, and it seemed to be only couples and very romantic. 

 

–

 

This question is meant seriously and I'd welcome especially non-cynical replies. I should have posted it earlier, but lost sight of this forum in the days it was not available recently.

 

Thanks 🕯️

 

You write very well ,I went last night it meant something to my Thai friend , go and enjoy.

[fondue zoo]

22 hours ago, Gottfrid said:

and she will rape the man out of you.

 

always the romantic Gottfrid   

[spidermike007]

The fact that she invited you to celebrate like Loy Kratong with her is not significant in and of itself. The fact that she asked you out on a date shows she is obviously interested, so it's incumbent upon you to make it clear to her that you're only interested in remaining friends and hopefully that will not put a damper on the good service you've been getting at your restaurant. 

 

50 and single, and her prospects are very limited. 

[fondue zoo]

21 hours ago, LS24 said:

I always find that touching knees with you or upper thighs or lower leg a very sweet gesture that even adult mature Thai women use as a cue to tell you that they like you.

 

Yeah. Are you certain you're not a seat hog and she just wants you move over?

 

_{kidding, unless it's a knee to the jewels, body contact is a good sign.}

[Lacessit]

When a lady takes me into her bed, I assume there are implications. Up until then, I don't read too much into the situation.

[LikeItHot]

She wants money.  This answer suits all questions to what a Thai lady wants.  

[Gottfrid]

2 hours ago, fondue zoo said:

 

always the romantic Gottfrid   

And that was not taken out of context? Totally against forum rules.

[JeffersLos]

You sound very new to Thailand, OP.

 

 

Your lady friend probably has a penis and pair of little grapes. 

[wombat]

implications...you just married her...did no one tell you?

[DogNo1]

Many men do not understand the strength of their own libido because its workings are mostly subconscious.    The libido can be affected by any pleasurable experience, not only sex.   Suppose that you have a good time when you float her Krathong and you part with just a friendly goodbye. How will you react to future invitations?   If you see her several times, your libido will probably be hooked.  It will become increasingly difficult for you to decline opportunities to be together.   If you don’t intend to marry her, you will need to keep your meetings to a minimum.  I speak from sad experience.  I had a pretty girlfriend in Japan who took me to various events and pampered me in the way that Japanese women do. I told her very early on that I didn’t want to marry her.  Our relationship went on in a friendly way for about a year until it became very clear that I didn’t want to marry but just play around.  She then cut off all contact.  I suffered the torture of the damned for about the next two years.  
 

I am no longer marriage material due to my advanced age but some young women could possibly envision me as a sugar daddy.   As a result, I carefully control my contacts with women.   It would be enjoyable to have a woman look after me but the price would be too high.  Women are, correctly, self-interested.  They won’t lavish care and attention on someone if there is no payback.  Have you ever contemplated the reason that Buddhist clergy in most countries are not allowed to have women or participate in parties unless they are connected with Buddhism? Regarding Catholics, I don’t know the present developments but Priests, Nuns and Monks have traditionally had to lead single lives.

 

My recommendation is that you enjoy yourself in Bangkok but be aware of the implications of your conduct.   You could end up paying a price that you can’t envision now.

[geisha]

On 11/27/2023 at 6:06 AM, bunnydrops said:

I would go and not try and read too much into it. Yes, she does sound like she wants to get to know you better and maybe you would like to know her better. Just go, and after say "Thank you" and part ways.

Probably a very innocent and kind gesture on her part. Be polite and then say goodnight see you soon at home time. Nothing wrong with having a hot coffee / tea/ icecream to show your thanks for learning something new. 

[henrik2000]

Hi all, thanks for many interesting comments! In the end I followed an advice by my local condo service worker. She said I should get her flowers after the Khratong action, so I took my lady to a flower stall at 11 pm and let her choose some. As predicted by the local condo service worker, my lady chose only roses in two colors and I had to urge her several times to take more than three (a big bunch finally cost less than one single rose in my country).

Before, she had filmed me as I floated the Khratong and had talked to a monk who confirmed that it was okay if we floated one Khratong for two people. When floating the Khratong, my hand touched the very seedy water of that temple pool; I thought it was a typically nice Thai caring gesture when she took out a little bottle and sprayed hand sanitizer into my hands.

We then went to an atmospheric, crowded mid-range restaurant with almost only Thai customers (she had waited until I suggested a restaurant, but happily agreed). The atmosphere there was quite upbeat with all staff and musicians in beautiful traditional dress (and sneakers).

While she never made any attempt to share any cost, she ordered extremely little (roses, food, drink) (unlike other, much richer Thai ladies in my experience who at the restaurant table order so much seafood at my expense that they can take home half of it).

We parted ways in a friendly way in front of her apartment door with her repeating her thankyous for everything, and later she sent me a few nice, unobtrusive messages including a photo of the roses in her place.

The weird thing is that I would like to take her out again, before I leave for a while, in spite of the 98% language barrier (but she doesn't need to talk much and still feels comfortable and happy-go-lucky as it seems, while aforementioned much richer Thai ladies were absolute motormouths (in excellent English)).

Even though it might be sensible not to take her out again if I don't have serious designs. When I picked her up in her restaurant, all co-workers and boss were all smiles, supportive and made friendly jokes as we set off (some of those co-workers quite desirable and anglophone, and I think the atmosphere was very comfortable for all parties). For our next outing I would likely pick her up in her restaurant again (only 2 days off per month). It can't be good to meet her in that public situation and then perhaps to disappear for a long while.

 

--

 

About aforementioned local condo service worker: she lives together with a much older, slightly ailing, but mobile Westerner. I noted the quite big Khratong in her office and she said she bought it for herself (100 THB) and will float it herself. I replied, that was very sad and the westerner should be with her when she chose and floated the Khratong. She replied in her basic English, "only important to care", and I didn't want to inquire what that was supposed to mean.