Thai woman challenges traditional roles with refusal to iron husband’s clothes

[webfact]

A Thai woman has taken to an online forum to vent about her mother-in-law’s nagging over her refusal to iron her husband’s clothes. The woman, who works away from home and returns only on weekends, argues that her husband should be able to iron his clothes.

 

The woman revealed that she lives with her husband’s family but works and resides in a different province during the week, returning home every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. She admits that she prefers to rest at home, rather than taking up household chores such as ironing. However, her mother-in-law frequently complains about her refusal to iron her son’s clothes, despite the son never expressing any issue about this matter himself.

 

It was noted that the mother-in-law would usually iron her son’s clothes before their marriage. However, after the wedding, she seemed to expect the daughter-in-law to take on this task. The woman expressed her confusion and frustration, as her husband had never ironed his clothes before.

 

Still, his mother never complained about him, instead directing her criticisms towards her daughter-in-law. She questioned why her husband couldn’t occasionally iron his clothes, as they share other household chores.

 

The forum post garnered much attention, with various opinions and viewpoints shared. Some suggested that the mother-in-law was likely influenced by traditional beliefs that the wife should care for her husband.

 

by Nattapong Westwood

PHOTO: via seventy four istock

 

Full story: The Thaiger 2024-01-04

 

- Cigna offers a range of visa-compliant plans that meet the minimum requirement of medical treatment, including COVID-19, up to THB 3m. For more information on all expat health insurance plans click here.

 

Get our Daily Newsletter - Click HERE to subscribe

 

[Dmaxdan]

My wife doesn't iron my clothes. Neither do I for that matter.

[VinnieK]

I bet she doesn't even know how to do it.

Most under-30s cannot even boil water.

 

 

 

[nikmar]

My wife does my work clothes - sometimes i do it myself. The things some people find to argue over. 

I like how my wife - probably due to laziness on her part - taught our son to iron his school clothes. He washes, cooks and cleans so at least he s not incapable of taking care of himeself

 

[OneMoreFarang]

36 minutes ago, webfact said:

Still, his mother never complained about him, instead directing her criticisms towards her daughter-in-law. She questioned why her husband couldn’t occasionally iron his clothes, as they share other household chores.

Because women do women's work. Isn't that obvious? 

 

 

[stoner]

will mommy also let him off the teet soon ? smh what is this guy 9. 

[BritManToo]

I'm betting there are plenty of other Thai women that will iron his clothes.

[Henryford]

So is she happy to do the "male" tasks, painting, cut the grass, car maintenance, decorating etc. Or does the man have to do everything?

[ravip]

It is incredible, that even today there are human beings believing women have a different set of standard work allocated to them!

Talk about male dominance...

[KhunLA]

Then don't complain when strolling around with hubby, and he looks like he slept in his clothes and just rolled out of bed.

 

I don't have that problems, since I live in a magic house: 

 

Edited January 4 by KhunLA

[ravip]

[PremiumLane]

Well this triggered the boomers

[Gaccha]

In modern times, you can rip up the rulebook if you want, but this possibly creates tension in the relationship. Since it means that every single issue becomes a point of contention. Who should do this who should do that...

 

She is not disputing with her husband in this, she is disputing with the wisdom of her mother-in-law. Could it be that her mother-in-law grasps the bigger issues... 

 

Modern society which lacks the firm rules of past generations, uses a mechanism of fake choice. It pretends to offer up the choice, but then you must accept only the socially successful option. The most famous example is paying for the woman on a date; on paper; this is a choice for the man to make. In practise, he must pay. His failure to pay is a signal of his failure to understand the rules of the game. His date then decides if this is acceptable.

 

The importance of this can be seen in the story of the child and the naked King. The lesson from that story is not that the crowd is foolish in not noticing the King is naked, but rather the child is foolish for not understanding the importance of not pointing out that the emperor is naked. They are, fortunately, just a child. The woman who refuses to iron is an adult.

 

Similarly, parents tell their middle class children that they can choose to go or not to go to university. In practise, the children are obliged to go to university. Those who don't pick up on these social signals, such as the woman here, suffer. These are related to what are known as "luxury beliefs".

 

The ultimate example is marriage. Society says women have a choice. But it is clearly a false choice. Elite women marry at very high levels even today. Only the women who don't grasp that the choice is false, choose not to marry. In other words it is a luxury belief perpetuated by the elite, but which damages the lives of women in the lower classes.

 

Society nowadays instead of telling you what to do, invites you to make the right decision. Your ability to flourish in that specific society with those specific rules will depend on that. 

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, ravip said:

It is incredible, that even today there are human beings believing women have a different set of standard work allocated to them!

Talk about male dominance...

If I provide all the money, she does all the housework.

That's fair.

 

I would be equally happy to live off her, and for me to do all the housework.

Her choice.

 

Nothing to do with male dominance, more to do with having money.

[BritManToo]

53 minutes ago, ravip said:

I know the value of a woman ........ and it's 500-1500bht (depending on shape and age).

[ravip]

46 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

If I provide all the money, she does all the housework.

That's fair.

 

I would be equally happy to live off her, and for me to do all the housework.

Her choice.

 

Nothing to do with male dominance, more to do with having money.

 

44 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I know the value of a woman ........ and it's 500-1500bht (depending on shape and age).

If I provide all the money, she does all the housework - yes, house maids.

 

Each to their own in standards of judgement!

...and then there is another standard with morals.

Money + power = we think we are right, always! Arrogance spice itup more IMHO

[BritManToo]

2 minutes ago, ravip said:

Money + power = we think we are right, always! Arrogance spice itup more IMHO

Nothing to do with thinking we are right.

To do with buying a service.

[ravip]

5 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Nothing to do with thinking we are right.

To do with buying a service.

OK. Getting married is buying a service or services.

Right, I just realised it.

 

(does this system work in the West? I am sure it works perfectly)

Edited January 4 by ravip

[ravip]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

I know the value of a woman ........ and it's 500-1500bht (depending on shape and age).

I was not referring to the Bar areas

[Liverpool Lou]

16 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

20 minutes ago, ravip said:

Money + power = we think we are right, always! Arrogance spice itup more IMHO

Nothing to do with thinking we are right.

Quite right.  We are right.

[bunnydrops]

She works all week and then has to travel home. It doesn't say what he is doing. It might be more relaxing if she came home less often,

[BritManToo]

2 minutes ago, bunnydrops said:

She works all week and then has to travel home. It doesn't say what he is doing. It might be more relaxing if she came home less often,

Doesn't say what she's doing either!

[PremiumLane]

2 hours ago, Gaccha said:

In modern times, you can rip up the rulebook if you want, but this possibly creates tension in the relationship. Since it means that every single issue becomes a point of contention. Who should do this who should do that...

 

She is not disputing with her husband in this, she is disputing with the wisdom of her mother-in-law. Could it be that her mother-in-law grasps the bigger issues... 

 

Modern society which lacks the firm rules of past generations, uses a mechanism of fake choice. It pretends to offer up the choice, but then you must accept only the socially successful option. The most famous example is paying for the woman on a date; on paper; this is a choice for the man to make. In practise, he must pay. His failure to pay is a signal of his failure to understand the rules of the game. His date then decides if this is acceptable.

 

The importance of this can be seen in the story of the child and the naked King. The lesson from that story is not that the crowd is foolish in not noticing the King is naked, but rather the child is foolish for not understanding the importance of not pointing out that the emperor is naked. They are, fortunately, just a child. The woman who refuses to iron is an adult.

 

Similarly, parents tell their middle class children that they can choose to go or not to go to university. In practise, the children are obliged to go to university. Those who don't pick up on these social signals, such as the woman here, suffer. These are related to what are known as "luxury beliefs".

 

The ultimate example is marriage. Society says women have a choice. But it is clearly a false choice. Elite women marry at very high levels even today. Only the women who don't grasp that the choice is false, choose not to marry. In other words it is a luxury belief perpetuated by the elite, but which damages the lives of women in the lower classes.

 

Society nowadays instead of telling you what to do, invites you to make the right decision. Your ability to flourish in that specific society with those specific rules will depend on that. 

 

Now that's copy pasta right there

[VinnieK]

3 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I'm betting there are plenty of other Thai women that will iron his clothes.

I got to see that.

Unless they are over-50s.

The women that is.

[Aviatorhi]

Let's start at the beginning... How much was the simsod... Then we can conduct a rudimentary cost benefit analysis of the situation. 

 

Though I don't see a situation where long term leasing beats short term rentals. 

[d2b2]

this breaking news story is enlightening band surely to be picked up by the world wire services

[DjSilver]

If he want ironed shirts he can do it himself or buy ironfree shirts 😂

[keithkarmann]

Why is this news?

[Bangkok Barry]

5 hours ago, Dmaxdan said:

My wife doesn't iron my clothes. Neither do I for that matter.

The secret to life is only wearing clothes that need no ironing.

[ozimoron]

No wonder Thai women find it difficult to find a decent foreign husband.