True love, marriage and regular sex for men in long term heterosexual relationships as espoused by Hollywood, novels and the public in general.

It doesn't exist in the western world, but nobody questions the fantasy .................

 

Sure you can get the odd bang, but not much after the first 2-3 years in a relationship.

You'd probably get more sex from random one night encounters with random women, than from a LTR with just the one.

But you dare not cohabit or have kids with a woman because she'll invariably take your pension, home assets and future income.

But nobody appears to publicly point this out, and anyone daring to try gets silenced fairly quickly.

 

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west (that's why we're all here, right?)

And I'll get many thumbs down for pointing this out, even though the thumbs down will come from people that never achieved this 'holy grail'.

You've all either 1) failed to get a women, or 2) succeeded and been divorced and asset stripped.

 

But why deny and hide this truth?

Married 3 times and no woman ever took me to cleaners. 

 

Maybe because I was too poors to hire a gardener 

27 minutes ago, Celsius said:

Married 3 times and no woman ever took me to cleaners. 

Maybe because I was too poors to hire a gardener 

But, by your own admission, you still didn't manage a lasting relationship!

And the fantasy, is one loving woman, with your children, in one loving marriage that lasts forever.

With frequent life long sex because you love each other.

 

The fantasy vows even state 'Until death do us part'!

No mention of 'Until you shag the gardener/pool boy/postman/milk man/window cleaner' .........

I think  these points apply:

 

1) You have to look good naked, if you don't you can't expect her to burn for desire for sex with you

 

2) She and you go into the relationship because both want something, when you both get it, the reason of being for the rel is gone, thus inevitably relationships tend to have sell by dates. Say she wants marriage and kids, when she gets those, what does she need you for now? Not a lot if she has money or a job.

 

3) With dating apps and social media women can date anyone in the world, it's made competition insane.

10 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

I think  these points apply:

 

1) You have to look good naked, if you don't you can't expect her to burn for desire for sex with you

 

2) She and you go into the relationship because both want something, when you both get it, the reason of being for the rel is gone, thus inevitably relationships tend to have sell by dates. Say she wants marriage and kids, when she gets those, what does she need you for now? Not a lot if she has money or a job.

 

3) With dating apps and social media women can date anyone in the world, it's made competition insane.

But the fantasy is it's for love, and everlasting, and nearly every man (and woman) will achieve it.

1 minute ago, BritManToo said:

But the fantasy is it's for love, and everlasting, and nearly every man (and woman) will achieve it.

 

I think a lot of people confuse limerence with love, this state of love when you first start out. Of course that's gone in a year or two. Guaranteed. Then, it will depend if you both get what you want, financial in her case, sex in your case.

 

Sometimes that can work out a long time, I was with the Russian wife for 23 years, until the "grass is greener" thing set in. 

 

It's never everlasting of course, even if it lasts one willl die first. It is a fantasy really. But long and lasting relationships can happen, if you pass two decades your'e pushing it though.

It's the consequence of the protestant strain of western values  run amok. The concept of family as the primary root of life has been atomized in the traditionally protestant nations. Emmanuel Todd's latest book Defeat of the West - Collapse of Power & Values spells it out - https://glenndiesen.substack.com/p/emmanuel-todd-defeat-of-the-west

Once more I will say this, so listen carefully 

 

A lang term relationship is like an garden where you plant seeds, and then imagine how this garden going to look like in 10 years, 20 years, and what you have to do to keep it fresh and good looking. 

 

It takes time, resources and understanding, and both parts have to contribute as well outside circumstances, be it the weather, or family or the place you live.

 

Not really hard to understand is it? I you plant seeds that do not belong, you know whats going to happen

 

There is good times, there is very good times, and there can be challenges around the corner, so it is just to be alert, and know what to do to deal with it. 

 

Negativity doesnt help much, 

9 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Once more I will say this, so listen carefully 

 

A lang term relationship is like an garden where you plant seeds, and then imagine how this garden going to look like in 10 years, 20 years, and what you have to do to keep it fresh and good looking. 

 

It takes time, resources and understanding, and both parts have to contribute as well outside circumstances, be it the weather, or family or the place you live.

 

Not really hard to understand is it? I you plant seeds that do not belong, you know whats going to happen

 

There is good times, there is very good times, and there can be challenges around the corner, so it is just to be alert, and know what to do to deal with it. 

 

Negativity doesnt help much, 

Yet here you are in Thailand with the rest of us!

And presumably not with a woman you brought with you, from your home country.

5 minutes ago, NotEinstein said:

It's the consequence of the protestant strain of western values  run amok. The concept of family as the primary root of life has been atomized in the traditionally protestant nations. Emmanuel Todd's latest book Defeat of the West - Collapse of Power & Values spells it out - https://glenndiesen.substack.com/p/emmanuel-todd-defeat-of-the-west

 

Love Emmanuel Todd, superb books. Really good.

It exist ... BUT ... good luck finding, and even better luck keeping.  Only took me a few marriages and live in relationships, along with a whole lot of fun in between, before finding a keeper.  

 

20 yrs on and not looking for another ❤️ ... nuff said 

12 minutes ago, KhunLA said:

It exist ... BUT ... good luck finding, and even better luck keeping.  Only took me a few marriages and live in relationships, along with a whole lot of fun in between, before finding a keeper.  

 

20 yrs on and not looking for another ❤️ ... nuff said 

But you're not in your home country.

It's different here, because they can only take what you freely give.

In the west the government will give them all, it's cheaper than providing benefits for them.

 

In nature women can't survive without the protection and providence from men.

Hence the former pretense of life long love.

But government has replaced us in the west, and will take from us to provide for them.

6 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Once more I will say this, so listen carefully 

 

A lang term relationship is like an garden where you plant seeds, and then imagine how this garden going to look like in 10 years, 20 years, and what you have to do to keep it fresh and good looking. 

 

It takes time, resources and understanding, and both parts have to contribute as well outside circumstances, be it the weather, or family or the place you live.

 

Not really hard to understand is it? I you plant seeds that do not belong, you know whats going to happen

 

There is good times, there is very good times, and there can be challenges around the corner, so it is just to be alert, and know what to do to deal with it. 

 

Negativity doesnt help much, 

I’ll bet you have a bookshelf full of self help books.

 

8 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Once more I will say this, so listen carefully 

This!   This is laugh out loud funny.   It’s rare to see such a high degree of inflated self importance.

My (thai) wife and I have talked about this before.

 

She is well educated, outspoken, catwalk-model quality beautiful, and independent minded. Most Thai guys shyed away from her when she was younger, or the guys she was interested in turned out to be of "lower status" than herself and it was evident that it could never be a well balanced relationship. So she moved abroad, and found me.

 

I have never had any interest in western women, and as a horny teenager growing up in a culturally segregated area in the west, this was immensely frustrating. But curiously, and I still don't understand why, western women have never ever shown any interest in me either. I'm 60 now and have never once dated or had sex with a western woman. I'm a nerd, mildly socially awkward, reasonably good looking, but short by western standards (173cm). I'm also highly educated, artistic mind-set, health conscious, I was a successful tech entrepreneur, and retired in my 40s.

 

My wife and I were married within 3 months of our first date. We knew we had found the right partner. We're married 24 years now, living in Thailand, and still in love. We've had ups and downs, but the one thing which keeps us sane is we accidentally (and independently) discovered we both are polyamorous. We both have had side-giks now for well over a decade. Both of our current side partners are also married and in poly relationships. I'm not talking about sex parties, orgies or 3sums, I am talking about genuine emotional relationships.

 

My wife and I talk openly about our side relationships and always work to balance and maintain our primary relationship. It's hard to avoid jealousy, it takes work. It is not something I recommend for everyone, but for us it saved our marriage. And we're both having the best sex of our lives, just not always with each other.

 

Sadly, polyamory is not something we can not discuss openly with our friends and family, particularly amongst Thai people in Thailand. That said, it is no longer surprising to me to meet other couples who are also poly. It's way more common that you might expect.

 

18 minutes ago, Airalee said:

I’ll bet you have a bookshelf full of self help books.

This!   This is laugh out loud funny.   It’s rare to see such a high degree of inflated self importance.

And I'll bet despite his 'advanced knowledge' he's out here living with a Thai woman having totally failed with women in his home country. Either divorced or never managed to get one.

 

There are 3 types of hetero men in the west ......

1. INCEL

2. Married INCEL

3. Divorced INCEL

Most of your life will be spent as one of these three, with brief interludes outside for the lucky (unlucky). 

12 minutes ago, clokwise said:

But curiously, and I still don't understand why, western women have never ever shown any interest in me either. I'm 60 now and have never once dated or had sex with a western woman. I'm a nerd, mildly socially awkward, reasonably good looking, but short by western standards (173cm). I'm also highly educated, artistic mind-set, health conscious, I was a successful tech entrepreneur, and retired in my 40s.

A common position for nearly all western men, although many of us will not admit that.

It's not you, you're the same as the rest of us ......... it's them!

6 minutes ago, Airalee said:

I’ll bet you have a bookshelf full of self help books.

 

This!   This is laugh out loud funny.   It’s rare to see such a high degree of inflated self importance.

 

How else to reply to a theme being repeated over and over again and again.

 

You got some poor humor

 

 

 

You are free to believe what you want. Mirror effect I suppose? 

 

 

16 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Yet here you are in Thailand with the rest of us!

And presumably not with a woman you brought with you, from your home country.

 

Well, I'm here for now, gone in a week, 

 

I settled with one woman 10 years ago, and still together. Before that working and travelling the world, and no time to settle. 

 

What I do not understand is this negative Wibe some of you constantly have to remind yourself about. Going in circles like a wounded animal 

8 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

And I'll bet despite his 'advanced knowledge' he's out here living with a Thai woman having totally failed with women in his home country.

 

As I said to Aierele, you guys are welcome to believe what you want, based on your own experiences.  

11 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Well, I'm here for now, gone in a week, 

I settled with one woman 10 years ago, and still together. Before that working and travelling the world, and no time to settle. 

What I do not understand is this negative Wibe some of you constantly have to remind yourself about. Going in circles like a wounded animal 

You've carefully avoided stating the nationality of your wife.

Wonder why?

No need to reply, I stated why in my OP.

You must understand that Western women have been programmed since at least 1990 to hate Western men.

 

By now it's endemic and fully maturised in the psyche of Western females.

 

I pity guys who are 20-30 years younger than me; they haven't a chance, no matter their status.

 

I was lucky to slay enough bush before the social engineering agenda grabbed hold.

 

As an older Western expat in Thailand it's game over as regards Western single ladies, but fortunately Thai ladies abound.

10 minutes ago, Woke to Sounds said:

I was lucky to slay enough bush before the social engineering agenda grabbed hold.

Me too, but once or twice a month wasn't enough for me.

Then I came to Thailand where the woman I lived with insisted on four to five times a day.

(Total nightmare being forced to perform that frequently)

27 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

You've carefully avoided stating the nationality of your wife.

Wonder why?

No need to reply, I stated why in my OP.

 

 

Do I own you an explanation? Thought you had commented my contributions now for years, and still do not know who you constantly repeating to? Especially in negative loaded treads like this!

 

Shallow minds get trapped in their own negativity. Enough said

 

So many think they know something about others, seeing themselves in the mud, huh

 

 

11 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Do I own you an explanation? Thought you had commented my contributions now for years, and still do not know who you constantly repeating to? Especially in negative loaded treads like this!

Shallow minds get trapped in their own negativity. Enough said

So many think they know something about others, seeing themselves in the mud, huh

Enjoy your fantasy and your virtue signaling!

Just now, BritManToo said:

Enjoy your fantasy!

 

You should check your last batch of weed, can't be good stuff.

This thread might attract a few people trapped in bad marriages, but still fiercely defending the institution of marriage?

 

I think this Youtube channel is generated by AI, but the doom and gloom crowd might find it amusing. 

 

Every Wedding is a Funeral in Disguise. 

 

 

One is my brother another guy I know my whole career 30 plus years. Scratching my head to think of any other couple I know married a long time, no divorce. Plus two alternative pairings who have never actually married, they seem to share common fetishes. Also my brother and his wife now take separate vacations.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west (that's why we're all here, right?)

"...that's why we're all here, right?"

Wrong.  Many are here, or came here originally, to work, nothing to do with unsuccessful relationships or desire for sex.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

It doesn't exist in the western world, but nobody questions the fantasy

Sure it does, as the relationships with my previous late wives were a good example. And sex definitely wasn’t the hierarchy of either relationship, both were based on sincere friendship, as with the current wife.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Sure you can get the odd bang, but not much after the first 2-3 years in a relationship.

True for most relationships.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

But you dare not cohabit or have kids with a woman because she'll invariably take your pension, home assets and future income.

For some but not all.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

You'd probably get more sex from random one night encounters with random women, than from a LTR with just the one.

Definitely for short term relationships.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

But nobody appears to publicly point this out, and anyone daring to try gets silenced fairly quickly.

This subject has been run over time and time again in the US.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west

Maybe?

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

(that's why we're all here, right?)

Definitely not.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west (that's why we're all here, right?)

And I'll get many thumbs down for pointing this out, even though the thumbs down will come from people that never achieved this 'holy grail'.

You've all either 1) failed to get a women, or 2) succeeded and been divorced and asset stripped.

 

But why deny and hide this truth?

Some folks tend to view the world through the prism of their own experience and understanding of which in many cases simply doesn’t apply to others. Though what you are overly focused on is the fact that th tends to attract a lot of desperate guys looking to hook up with a chick, and in many cases due to their inexperience with women in general, they latch onto the first thing they get their hands on. 

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

True love, marriage and regular sex for men in long term heterosexual relationships as espoused by Hollywood, novels and the public in general.

It doesn't exist in the western world, but nobody questions the fantasy .................

 

Sure you can get the odd bang, but not much after the first 2-3 years in a relationship.

You'd probably get more sex from random one night encounters with random women, than from a LTR with just the one.

But you dare not cohabit or have kids with a woman because she'll invariably take your pension, home assets and future income.

But nobody appears to publicly point this out, and anyone daring to try gets silenced fairly quickly.

 

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west (that's why we're all here, right?)

And I'll get many thumbs down for pointing this out, even though the thumbs down will come from people that never achieved this 'holy grail'.

You've all either 1) failed to get a women, or 2) succeeded and been divorced and asset stripped.

 

But why deny and hide this truth?

Dude I have 4. Raped and recovered. Never again.

 

My kid is cool for a Leftist. She has a real job.