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Thai Wife visiting family dynamics

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On 1/4/2026 at 10:32 PM, Kinnock said:

Your previous post was about your wife not interacting with you and your family, and one good piece of advice from a poster was to protect your finances and prepare for a divorce. I hope you took this advice.

With my Missus I come first, we're a partnership and she manages family visits around our schedule so our own routines are not impacted. I trust her 100% (and she trusts me about 80% 😅) and I wouldn't ask for relationship advice on a forum as she'd be my first port of call for a serious chat about any big issues.

The fact you're asking us lot for advice suggests to me you have a problem, and while she's unlikely to initiate a divorce, as her family see you as financial insurance, she's clearly not happy in the relationship.

My advice, (for what it's worth - as any advice from a stranger is likely to be unreliable), is to use the time while she's in Thailand to protect your personal finances. Set up a private (none joint) account, transfer funds, assets and property to trusted family members where practical. Then when she returns, ask her straight out if she's happy in the relationship and if she has anyone else back in Thailand.

Ask her if she sees your relationship as a business transaction. Ask her if she loves you ..... yes, love is real, especially for Thai girls raised on Lakorn serials.

If her responses are not convincing, reset your life and start again afresh.

There's no shortage of good women out there, don't settle for one you wouldn't trust with your life.

Just cut to the chase and ask the OP where he met his wife?

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  • Yes, her family comes first, you second.

  • couchpotato
    couchpotato

    That's just a generalisation. But just a thought..possibly an old boyfriend or ex husband was the real reason to go home.

  • rattlesnake
    rattlesnake

    Lots of negative types on this forum, who project their own failures on others. I can give you my personal experience and opinion, for what it's worth. I have been with my Thai wife for 14+ years, we

On 1/4/2026 at 11:54 PM, djb687 said:

My understanding is its not respectful to use your phone with the elders and other family around?

Quaint notion, but not true.

On 1/5/2026 at 12:33 AM, norsurin said:

When she returned after 10 weeks she was pregnant

That's always a pretty fair indication of where you stand

On 1/7/2026 at 3:42 PM, NanLaew said:

Just cut to the chase and ask the OP where he met his wife?

My guess is he was out looking for Miss Wright for tonight and she was working bar,
How else would they meet?

On 1/4/2026 at 8:08 PM, stubuzz said:

As i said. You are tolereated at best.

Projection ?

From experience here - myself and with friends...

A handful of marriages where I see the husband is the priority - extended family (in-laws, brothers sisters) get on extremely well, respect and in some cases really adore the husband... In others, he's a side show...

So status clearly varies... its a very individual thing and based very much on the individuals themselves and the morals and character of the families they are involved with and their own behavior etc

  • Popular Post
On 1/5/2026 at 11:51 AM, Cameroni said:

You want to be very careful with this, because Thai girls use the family visit as a cover story. Instead of being with family she instead goes to see some guy she met on a dating app. Which is why you then don't hear a lot from her. Not saying that's what your girl is doing, but it happens.

Insist she send you photos with her family.

This is absolute forum gold !!!! - Advice on relationships from Cameroni while he is refusing to believe his GF who says she was in Sisaket visiting family is hiding the fact she's working in a Pattaya bar smashing her way through this high-seasons mongers...

1 minute ago, richard_smith237 said:

This is absolute forum gold !!!! - Advice on relationships from Cameroni while he is refusing to believe his GF who says she was in Sisaket visiting family is hiding the fact she's working in a Pattaya bar smashing her way through this high-seasons mongers...

Is that what the shamless thread is about ?

On 1/4/2026 at 9:57 PM, couchpotato said:

That's just a generalisation. But just a thought..possibly an old boyfriend or ex husband was the real reason to go home.

That's a big assumption.

You mentioned she hadn't seen her family for about 2.5 years.

Perhaps she started to feel guilty and that's what's now driving her thoughts.

Are you considering coming to thailand to see her, her family? Do you have any kids? If so where are they now?

Just now, scorecard said:

That's a big assumption.

You mentioned she hadn't seen her family for about 2.5 years. Perhaps she started to feel guilty about not seeing her family and that's what's now driving her thoughts, attitudes?

Are you considering coming to Thailand to see her and her family? Do you have any kids? If so where are they now?

It is fairly normal. After a month or so in Thailand, and getting sucked into all the family dramas etc. etc. you might find she starts missing you more.

For my missus, I am expected to call her 2 times a day when we are apart. I'm not really sure why this requirement rests solely with me. We usually just exchange hellos and the conversation is over in less than 30 seconds. Sometimes, when she is at a meal with family/friends she will want to video call and go around the table.

I would expect your wife would want the odd video call with you when she is with family, if nothing else to prove to her family/friends she is in a stable and happy relationship. I would find it odd if she never does this.

On 1/4/2026 at 9:45 PM, msbkk said:

Yes, her family comes first, you second.

you mean 3rd after the soi dogs.....coffee1

3 minutes ago, brian69 said:

you mean 3rd after the soi dogs.....coffee1

And another gem 🤣🤣

On 1/5/2026 at 5:43 PM, djb687 said:

She did video call me today again for only 5 minutes but showed me her mother and they were in her house.

I'm in Thailand, but a few times a year my wife goes to see her family down south, I rarely get a phone call and it only lasts a minute or two.

On 1/4/2026 at 2:45 PM, msbkk said:

Yes, her family comes first, you second.

Buffalo next

Dogs

Chickens

Husband!

🤣

6 minutes ago, brian69 said:

I'm in Thailand, but a few times a year my wife goes to see her family down south, I rarely get a phone call and it only lasts a minute or two.

Does her brother ever pick you up.

4 minutes ago, blaze master said:

Does her brother ever pick you up.

He has never tried to pick me up, thank god....coffee1

It’s not abnormal behavior to not contact you as much as you’d like. She’s in her familiar environment. Regarding potential misbehavior it’s irrelevant to call frequency.

A whole host of possibilities as to what is going on, from harmless to harmful. Impossible to come up with meaningful advice without more detail.

If she's in some dusty village, I'm not sure if I'm buying the "busy running around making the most of the visit" explanation. What the hell are they doing? Perfecting the family som tam recipe? If they're in a more urban area or doing a lot of sightseeing, well that's another story. You'd think the family would have a smidge of curiosity about you if you're video conferencing.

I wouldn't worry too much about infidelity at this point, but if after she gets back home, she wants to go back again quickly, that would be a red flag. If she balks at you accompanying her, that would really set the alarm bells off for me. All this is set in the context of the OP having said he has experienced marital problems in past. A lot of Thai men would be a little jittery about letting their wives go back to her home village unaccompanied. Too many concerns about old flames from high school, that sort of thing.

On 1/4/2026 at 10:53 PM, chickenslegs said:

She hasn't seen her family and friends for over 2 years. Of course she will be busy catching up and having fun.

The odd 5 minutes video call should (IMO) be enough to keep you posted about what's going on, and assure you that she still wants to come home to you. I'm assuming you two are not insecure teenagers.

Let her have her fun, and don't be too needy. If you can't trust her you shouldn't have married her and taken her away from her family (is my opinion).

Mine goes to visit family once amonth andusually it is just a line hi how are you until she gets back.

If you are in the UK and expect her back, you may be in trouble as you are now competing with her family and friends telling her how much life is better in Thailand for her.

On 1/4/2026 at 8:08 PM, stubuzz said:
On 1/4/2026 at 7:54 PM, djb687 said:

My understanding is its not respectful to use your phone with the elders and other family around?

On 1/4/2026 at 6:59 PM, djb687 said:

She's with her phone all the time in the UK - always has been from day 1.

As i said. You are tolereated at best.

2 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:
On 1/4/2026 at 8:08 PM, stubuzz said:

As i said. You are tolereated at best.

Projection ?

Do not quote me out of context.

Sounds like you have a good wife. You just need to trust her. She's trusting you to be alone too.

  • Author
On 1/15/2026 at 6:19 AM, rwill said:

Sounds like you have a good wife. You just need to trust her. She's trusting you to be alone too.

You are right. I do believe I am the one who should be trusting her. She missed her family, was there the whole time and returned to the UK now. She explained she was busy with family and didn't have time to talk/text all the time.

On 1/4/2026 at 9:06 PM, djb687 said:

Hi All,

I am looking to understand if this is usually what you expect being married to a Thai woman going to visit family. I've never been married to someone who has family in another country so not sure what to expect on the communication level side of things.

We have been married for two years and she hadn't been back to see family for about 2.5 years and she said a couple of weeks before Christmas she feels homesick so booked a ticket to go home and spend time with family in Isan (I couldn't go with because I had family commitments in the UK). The whole time she's been there she's barely spoken to me, the odd 5 minute video call here and there telling me she's busy with family - but the usually love you etc has been exchanged. Is this normal when they visit home to be so busy they can hardly speak to husband back home?

Your UK family commitments are what, celebrating Christmas or something important.

Seems to me that going with your wife to Thailand for a bit after she spend 2.5 years in your country isn't too much to ask from her side.

  • Author
11 hours ago, FritsSikkink said:

Your UK family commitments are what, celebrating Christmas or something important.

Seems to me that going with your wife to Thailand for a bit after she spend 2.5 years in your country isn't too much to ask from her side.

I agree. We've now committed to going to Thailand once every 6 months so she doesn't feel homesick again

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