Golf Group

[alvino]

Four guys who worked together always golfed as a group at 7:00

a.m. on Sunday. Unfortunately, one of them got transferred out

of town and they were talking about trying to fill out the

foursome.

A woman standing near the tee said, "Hey, I like to golf, can I

join the group?" They were hesitant, but said she could come

once to try it and they could see what they thought.

They all agreed and she said, "Good, I'll be there at 6:30 or

6:45." She showed up right at 6:30, and wound up setting a

course record with a 7-under par round. The guys went nuts and

everyone in the clubhouse congratulated her.

Meanwhile, she was fun and pleasant the entire round. The guys

happily invited her back the next week and she said, "Sure, I'll

be here at 6:30 or 6:45."

Again, she showed up at 6:30 Sunday morning. Only this time, she

played left-handed, and matched her 7-under par score of the

previous week. By now the guys were totally amazed, and they

asked her to join the group for keeps. They had a beer after

their round, and one of the guys asked her, "How do you decide

if you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?"

She said, "That's easy. Before I leave for the golf course, I

pull the covers off my husband, who sleeps in the nud_e. If his

member is pointing to the right, I golf right-handed; if it's

pointed to the left, golf left-handed."

One of the guys asked, "What if it's pointed straight up?"

She said, "Then I'll be here at 6:45."

[kayo]

I believe it was Douglas Adams (HHGTTG) who wrote something along these lines... (slightly improvised due to lack of memory)

A long time ago in Scotland some old Clansmen were fiddling about with some sticks and a little round thing they called a ball. It was slightly large and they would put it on a tea cup and hit it as hard as they could, to see how far it would go. This not only provided them with some form of recreation, but also got them away from their nagging wives at home.

The McEwans and McGregors and mots of other Mc`s enjoyed doing this very much and were spending more and more time playing this game, when their wives started becoming suspicious.

One day the wives followed their husbands of up a hill (not to the top!) and breathed a collective sigh of relief when they saw their men playing a game with eachother and not doing lots of naughty things with other (thai...) girls.

The women start chatting and decided to go and join their beloved Husbands.

McEwan nudged McGregor and said, "Oh no, the lasses `ave found us!" as McGregor`s wife approached.

McGregor, not taking any funny business from his wife, turned to her as she asked, "Hello my bonnie prince charming, what is this game you are playing"

A name they had not yet invented, so McGregor comes up with one.

"It`s called GOLF, luv. Gentlemen Only, Ladies <deleted>@# Off!"

originally posted in the ageing thread by accident.