My Maid Is Pregnant

[jaideeguy]

My maid/sister in law [who has been with us for 3+yrs] is now 6+ months pregnant and altho at her best, she only preformed at 50%....lazy little sister of my Thai wife.

Wife informs me that she will only be 'out of service' for a month after delivering and she can work up til the delivery, but I'm seeing her work [normally at 50%] slowing down to a crawl. My wife is doing the maid's normal chores, washing clothes, etc and it will only get worse, even if all goes well.

My question is 'what is my obligation?', as her employer....do I pay her full salery for the month that she is out of service?? and if there are any complications$$, do I pay??

she is married to a lazy truckdriver and they already have too many mouths to feed and IMHO, it was totally irrisponsible for her to let this happen, but too late now. I call it 'her mistake' and could easily let her go, but my wife........

[coventry]

My maid/sister in law [who has been with us for 3+yrs] is now 6+ months pregnant and altho at her best, she only preformed at 50%....lazy little sister of my Thai wife.

Wife informs me that she will only be 'out of service' for a month after delivering and she can work up til the delivery, but I'm seeing her work [normally at 50%] slowing down to a crawl. My wife is doing the maid's normal chores, washing clothes, etc and it will only get worse, even if all goes well.

My question is 'what is my obligation?', as her employer....do I pay her full salery for the month that she is out of service?? and if there are any complications$$, do I pay??

she is married to a lazy truckdriver and they already have too many mouths to feed and IMHO, it was totally irrisponsible for her to let this happen, but too late now. I call it 'her mistake' and could easily let her go, but my wife........

My wife say's pay her for the one month, but no longer.

[notasexpat]

put the kid up for adoption for foreign couples.. if she doesnt oblidge fire her. You'd be doing her a favor

srsly.. 80% of the planet's problem is rednecks and dumbass procreating, 10% is inbreading and rest is polution

Edited April 1, 2009 by notasexpat

[jaideeguy]

If I wasn't related [by marriage], the maid would have been back in the provence years ago and if I had a say, then I would insist on putting it up for adoption......maybe Angina Jolie is shopping..

One sad thing that I didn't mention was that the soon to be born kid has a good chance of having 'thalisema'......a genetic condition that could be screened for in a planned birth. Odds are that the kid could be born anemic and may [or may not] make it to term and not too good of a future.

Why do the 'breaders' have to be ignorant, poor and lazy???

[Mosha]

Why should Thailand be different. Social security in the UK encourages the system of inferior breeding.

[TonySoprano]

you need a time machine. never mix work and family.

[GuestHouse]

You employed your sister in-law as a maid .... what were you thinking?!

.... Don't tell me... you weren't thinking

[Lucifer]

It appears that your wife is the one who's really employing her. So let her take up the slack that her sister has/is leaving.

I'm sure after a while the novelty will wear off.

Mind you, around here blood is stupider than water.

[ronz28]

This is a family thing and a lot more than employer/employee. I let the wife make the decision on what to do in those situations. She knows that anything paid to the sister reduces what you both have but probably not by much relatively speaking. Since Thai families are so supportive of each other, to me, I would expect to help her sister out by accepting reduced service for same pay, if pay is at a usual and customary level for such work without considering the temporary reduction in service.

[TopDogger]

You employed your sister in-law as a maid .... what were you thinking?!

.... Don't tell me... you weren't thinking

It's not like she'll be expecting a free meal or anything...

Edited April 1, 2009 by TopDogger

[jaideeguy]

"You employed your sister in-law as a maid .... what were you thinking?!

.... Don't tell me... you weren't thinking"

Actually, we had a small business [that fialed] and she was brought in to work that. when it failed, the wife hired her as a maid, as she had no job or income in the provence and we did need the help, as our 'estate' has become a maintenance nightmare and we could really use the help.

Yeah, I'll let the wife take up the slack, but I'm the one that will ultimately suffer with the extra burden on the wife.

[coventry]

Why do the 'breaders' have to be ignorant, poor and lazy???

Because that is the way the rich want them to be, easy controllable. It makes them richer.

[TonySoprano]

give her 2 month salary and send her home now. then tell her to stay there.

sorted.

[tw25rw]

Offer to buy her husband a vasectomy. Then everyone wins.

[torrenova]

In a pickle after the birth of our daughter and the disappearance of our maid, the missus took on her cousin or some other such relation. I was against it but we agreed to give it a trial. I wrote down what was required, be that daily, weekly and monthly. Childcare was not just sitting in front of the TV.

After less than a month I fired her. I went to go through the list of duties she had agreed to undertake and had failed to do so when she just walked out.

In hindsight, I should never have let it happen, even when backed into a corner by circumstances.

To answer the OP, I also go with another poster's idea to send her home now (the further the better) saying that it is not fair to expect her to continue her work now she is so heavily pregnant. I would give her a couple of months salary as well and of course your missus will give something when the baby is born so she will have some cash. I'd get another maid and make it clear to your other half that she is not coming back. No more employees from within the family.

[dave111223]

Offer to buy her husband a vasectomy. Then everyone wins.

Buy the maid a kitchen knife and leave a condom wrapper in the husband's truck.

Saves money on the vasectomy, plus the ducks will get a good dinner.

[rolypie]

Hmmmm a Thai family member taking the piss didnt see that one coming!!

[MyphuketLife]

If you don't fire her and send her on her marry way, you will be stressed and it will cause small fights with the wife. If you do fire her and send her packing, it will cause your wife huge stress/family shame/loss of face, and inturn cause you stress, and lots of fights....

Really its a no win, but I would go with not causing "Loss of face/family shame" to your wife....

On a side now when I read the title and heading I did not expect the following story I was expecting that the maid was pregnet by you...

[anothertorres]

pay the month, eat the cost and insist she doesn't come back until the child is 18.

[neverdie]

I would imagine that your wife is going to be very upset when you 'fess up' to doing the deed with your maid, the fact that it is your wifes sister isnt really going to do you any favours either. SHAME ON YOU!

[ballbreaker]

Your in the situation now so make the best of it. Pay the sister and let the wife deal with problem.

I still don't understand why people hire maids unless perhaps both are working full time jobs. Even then I wonder if its really necessary.

I know the cost of hiring a maid is cheap in Thailand but really did you have one in the part of the world you came from. My wife and I get by without hired help by splitting the work. Its not hard and takes only a couple hours a day at most.

[yogi]

as she is family also,i think you should pay full,

[MJo]

Your in the situation now so make the best of it. Pay the sister and let the wife deal with problem.

I still don't understand why people hire maids unless perhaps both are working full time jobs. Even then I wonder if its really necessary.

I know the cost of hiring a maid is cheap in Thailand but really did you have one in the part of the world you came from. My wife and I get by without hired help by splitting the work. Its not hard and takes only a couple hours a day at most.

Are you both working average 12 hour days ?

Normal 9 to 5 job is ok. When you both work more it is quite hard to keep up so if you can afford it why not.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

You employed your sister in-law as a maid .... what were you thinking?!

.... Don't tell me... you weren't thinking

Yup.

That's by far the biggest issue here.

If she wasn't family then yes, you would pay her during maternity leave. Not because it's the law because I seriously doubt you're officially employing her and paying tax and giving her social security, but because it's The Right Thing To Do.

[Gary A]

Why have a maid in the first place? I can see VERY few reasons to have a maid. If the wife has children and is working a well paying job. that could be a reason but just to give your wife a big face is NOT a good reason.

[HumChang]

Knock your wife up.

Pregnant boss takes priority over pregnant staff so you can fire her easier and explain you cant pay anymore money because you need it for the new baby.

Then.. hire a new maid at a lower rate - Win/Win

[jaideeguy]

To set the record straight.....I am not the father, wouldn't touch the maid with someone else's member, much less mine.

As far as sending her back to the provence...can't happen as she is baan registered here in CM and wouldn't qualify for govmt medical back in the provence.....so, we're stuck with her until after the birth. Also, she has a common law husband [father of upcmming baby] and does have a job here, altho menial and don't think he could find work down there and would continue to be a burden.

someone suggested the pros and cons of sending her back now with two months pay....wish it was that easy.....I'll gladly send her back with 3 months pay just to get rid of her, as she is a drain on my already drained economy.

OH, her tubes will be tied during the cecerian operation....standard procedure acording to the wife.........that's the good news.

It is a no win situation. Sad to say that the ultimate looser will be the kid.

Lesson learned.....don't hire family for maids.

[patklang]

Your in the situation now so make the best of it. Pay the sister and let the wife deal with problem.

I still don't understand why people hire maids unless perhaps both are working full time jobs. Even then I wonder if its really necessary.

I know the cost of hiring a maid is cheap in Thailand but really did you have one in the part of the world you came from. My wife and I get by without hired help by splitting the work. Its not hard and takes only a couple hours a day at most.

I can answer that no problems.

Showing off to their friends and trying to get on the ladder of being hi-so,the next thing will be buying tons of whitener,especialy if the maid is slightly darker than white.

[jaideeguy]

Actually, the maid's main function is to provide Thai contact....not to mention that she is the younger sister and wife can boss her around, plus feels more comfortable than she would be bossing a stranger. If stranger and younger.....then jealousy. If stranger and older.....she can't boss.

Our maid was a looser back home...barely able to feed her kid and the choice to hire her was mostly to help her. now I know that 'helping the helpless is hopeless"

[Lozfranco]

My maid/sister in law [who has been with us for 3+yrs] is now 6+ months pregnant and altho at her best, she only preformed at 50%....lazy little sister of my Thai wife.

Wife informs me that she will only be 'out of service' for a month after delivering and she can work up til the delivery, but I'm seeing her work [normally at 50%] slowing down to a crawl. My wife is doing the maid's normal chores, washing clothes, etc and it will only get worse, even if all goes well.

My question is 'what is my obligation?', as her employer....

You don't have any obligations, if she's lazy sack her.

If you find that too difficult, next time your shagging your wife tell her that you're the father of her sisters baby (don't forget to hold on tight at this point). This approach will have a two fold outcome. You will get the ride of your life and your wife will kick out her sister.

Edited April 2, 2009 by Lozfranco