Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Golfing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,

Troubled User.....

_____________________________________

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

Trading the whole computer in on a new & improved model should allow for resetting all modes back to default user preference.

Have you not made the backup?

Ctrl-Alt-Del

^ lol.... I nearly did it too.... before I remembered...

The way to get around OS Wife 1.0 is to partition before installing. If the OS causes grief, change BIOS settings to boot from E drive which has Batchelor 2.3 OS and can launch Girlfriend 8 and/or 2 Week Fishing Trip (Pacific Edition in my case)

To do this, it is highly reccomended to increase the size of your cache beforehand.

Tip for first time users: Child processing does take up alot of space and Wife 1.0 will begin processing virally, with little warning (symptoms of viral reproduction include sudden changing of wallpaper, deletion of old GF 6 files, and hoarding of RAM). It is important that anti-virus software be updated to match you new OS, in particular ensure Prophylaxis 2009 be downloaded for a modest sum.

I would never return to the girlfriend programme, my wife 1.0 is simply perfect!

I have friends who are up to wife 3.0 - what a life...

I have installed Wifie 2.0 (trial verson.)

Excellent so far.

Will keep updating.

Hope to install full version in near future.

I ran Girlfriend 7.0 and Wife 1.0 successfully in conjunction for a while.

The trick is to use two sepearate operating systems. Keeping Wife 1.0 running in Australia XP and Girlfriend 7.0 in Thailand Vista will do it provided the breaching program Business Trip 3.5 is installed.

Considerable care must be taken though that photos and emails from Girlfriend 7.0 aren't accidentally filed in Wife 1.0.

^ Hmm...i would think you are at higher risk of getting a virus and having system crashes by messing about with your Operating Systems like that. One or both may even shut down without warning on you. I think best to learn how to use and run one system well. Also, if you maintain your system well, keep it clean, and perform regular updates, you will less likely have any glitches or failures.

Not as much fun though. Somepeople like to live dangerously.

I'm a one system man now.

I have installed Wifie

Is that the wireless version?

I have installed Wifie

Is that the wireless version?

Very good Mossfinn.

Separate computers in separate locations can work very well.

Machine 1, with Wife #3 OS installed works very well from a home base, while on overseas posting one needs other machines such as Vietnamese Bargirl (several versions available) and a Philippines based system derived from the Date In Asia (systems operating multiple projects simultaneously) which allows for time-limited couplings - usually over the weekend.

Best to maintain a fixed level of input into all these systems, as over-use of any one system can cause irreparable damage to your own O/S.

It seems to me that the basic controlling hardwear for all these programs is pussy_1.aways1.

Certainly seems to be the driving force neccessary to run all the other softwear.

It seems to me that the basic controlling hardwear for all these programs is pussy_1.

Only if you have a compatible dongle.

I guess you guys havent branched out into other available software? Such as bf 3.0, Hubby 1.0, and LB (various versions).

Personally i find bf 3.0 is user friendly and provides all the necessary functions, so will not be looking to upgrade to Hubby 1.0 as yet. Also, from what i gather Hubby 1.0 can work well when newly installed, but may become sluggish, slowing up as time goes on, particularly if it is asked to run too many programs. Instability is apparently an issue after a certain length of time/age also, causing the OS to respond in unpredictable ways. Think ill stick with the bf version.

Hubbys tend to pick up the dreaded DROOP virus after a few years as well.

Hello tech support.

A software I have says to hit any key.

I can't fiond the any key on my keyboard.

Help me please.

I have installed Wifie

Is that the wireless version?

Very good Mossfinn.

Mr Moss, grrrrrrrrrrrr

You prefer, Wifey.2.0, I guess.

I prefer the original.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=wifie

This gets my vote as the funniest thread on TV. We're so lucky to have it in Bedlam.

Wife 1.0 works better if you boot it regularly.

This gets my vote as the funniest thread on TV. We're so lucky to have it in Bedlam.

Wife 1.0 works better if you boot it regularly.

Everywhere time you boot you must also turn on wife 1.0 so she can work.

I have installed Wifie

Is that the wireless version?

You prefer, Wifey.2.0, I guess.

No strings attached,

or wires being crossed here

I guess you guys havent branched out into other available software? Such as bf 3.0, Hubby 1.0, and LB (various versions).

Personally i find bf 3.0 is user friendly and provides all the necessary functions, so will not be looking to upgrade to Hubby 1.0 as yet. Also, from what i gather Hubby 1.0 can work well when newly installed, but may become sluggish, slowing up as time goes on, particularly if it is asked to run too many programs. Instability is apparently an issue after a certain length of time/age also, causing the OS to respond in unpredictable ways. Think ill stick with the bf version.

So does Hubby 1.0 or bf 3.0 come on a hard disc or 3.5 inch floppy?

I avoid the LB software completely, it comes with too many attatchments and a potentially painful plug-in.

This really is a rather silly thread - all this talk about the Wife 1.0 program. I can't understand why you people continue to acquire software that you know can be unreliable. Why go to the expense of this program - particularly since it is so vulnerable to hackers (that nasty trojan Cuckold 1.0 comes to mind). As others have noted, the Wife program requires high maintenance and ongoing plugins and it is very difficult (and expensive) to upgrade to later versions. As already stated, it also self-installs unwanted additional software in the background (aside from the Nag program, that insidious Clothes Shopping worm with its continuous feedback loop comes to mind). No, I prefer the safety of the Occasional Shag software - it comes in many versions and rarely leaves unwanted bits of code in your registry when you uninstall.

Ping, if you don't like the newer operating systems, stick with (e)X-P(rozzie)1.0

It seems to me that the basic controlling hardwear for all these programs is pussy_1.

Only if you have a compatible dongle.

So does Hubby 1.0 or bf 3.0 come on a hard disc or 3.5 inch floppy?

I thought floppies were old technology...

So does Hubby 1.0 or bf 3.0 come on a hard disc or 3.5 inch floppy?

I thought floppies were old technology...

OI, respect yer elders, "OLD"....... sheeeeesh!

Wotchit there, my technology is 5 1/4" disk technology and still as hard as needed.

Wifey 2.0 (Trial edition) is happy with the performance.

Wifey 1.00 was running in, Lucy 4.00 format.

God bless her.