I have a thread running now and the flames are beginning. Usual suspects. Normally I would say something in response. I can't use the report function because it is against my personal code of conduct. I am trying a new tactic. I am not going to respond to them at all. This is a bit grating because I would like to tell them off. But that serves no purpose except to turn it into a flame war, something out of a kindergarten class.

Any one else have any ideas on how best to respond to a flame without involving the TV cops. When someone attacks you personally with no connection to the topic of the thread what do you do? I realize they are simply seeking attention by putting down someone else and responding to them only encourages their childish behavior. Ideas?

use the report button. or just say, off topic and then continue on the discussion.

Or don't post threads guaranteed to bring out the flamers as you seem wont to do.

I ask how to respond to flames. Response, don't post topics that encourage flames. Hmmm.

Any one else have any ideas on how best to respond to a flame without involving the TV cops.

No.

When someone attacks you personally with no connection to the topic of the thread what do you do?

I usually give it to them back, but sort of regret it with the inevitable happens.

Can't you just respond to their post and leave out their personal attack on you, at the same time not fanning the flames, but just deconstruct their content.

Anyone want to debate my response, particularly the MasterDebator?

The best thing to do with flames is ignore them thus confirming that you're an adult and the flamer is a child.

The best thing to do with flames is ignore them thus confirming that you're an adult and the flamer is a child.

So far it is working well. I posted one message to no one in particular that I would not respond to flames or personal attacks and then I referred any flames to that post. See post #74. A mod arrived and deleted one post and a response and that was OK. The flames seem to have stopped and the discussion is basically on topic. I had considered if the flames were justified because of the nature of the topic I started but that is kind of like the Thai traffic accident philosophy when a Thai runs into a Falang auto. The accident would not have happened if the Falang was not in Thailand.

All and all it is a bit like turning the other cheek but that is not a bad feeling. It is difficult to have a fight when only one person is punching.

It is difficult to have a fight when only one person is punching.

Maybe, but it makes it a lot easier to hand out a total beat down.

It is difficult to have a fight when only one person is punching.

Maybe, but it makes it a lot easier to hand out a total beat down.

For real.

typically they run for cover or yell for mommy to come help.

The best thing to do with flames is ignore them thus confirming that you're an adult and the flamer is a child.

So far it is working well. I posted one message to no one in particular that I would not respond to flames or personal attacks and then I referred any flames to that post.

If you are posting messages regarding flaming and feel that your strategy is working well then you're not ignoring them.

The best thing to do with flames is ignore them thus confirming that you're an adult and the flamer is a child.

So far it is working well. I posted one message to no one in particular that I would not respond to flames or personal attacks and then I referred any flames to that post.

If you are posting messages regarding flaming and feel that your strategy is working well then you're not ignoring them.

Correct. Your best result with this tactic is a draw.

A long time ago I learnt that many people do not really want to hear too much about life experiences of another, especially if they are varied, humourus, interesting,and further more actually make their own life appear a little less exciting by comparison. Relating an exciting, or unusual happening in your life can to some appear to be a type of oneupmanship, to other more balanced confident people it is simply your experience.

The way some posters deal with the information provided from actual life experience is to question the validity. If the raconteur is not attempting to falsely upgrade his experience, the doubters will never catch him out, thus the only vent for their frustrations is to belittle the poster, not the content of the post.

Your 'refer to post #74' is proving effective. Unfortunately I can see that particular thread descending into discussion of the usual topic where many posters appear to have most experience and knowledge.

Hands up, I occasionally respond to the flame, but mostly try to ignore them. If I am out of options, or fed up of the repetitve responses, I generally use a smiley under their latest post and cease to respond......flamers don't appear to appreciate that particular response.

Edit spelling...comparison gets me every time!!

You can say.....

'Sticks and stones can hurt my bones, but words can never hurt me!!'

I mostly just ignore the 't-vidiots', but sometimes i'm stupid enough to let them 'bait' me and that leads to getting the OP off track. It amazes me how many t-vidiots there are out there that have nothing better to do than hi-jack a sincere post.

Mark; to keep the topic on topic will usually mean ignoring those who mentioned. Why not send them a pm and tell them how you really feel and inform them that you are blocking any further chit chat with them via pm.

I ask how to respond to flames. Response, don't post topics that encourage flames. Hmmm.

sbk is right, Mark. It's best to post interesting topics such as "Where can I get a Pad Thai in Pattaya?" or, "Is there bus transport every day from Bangkok to Pattaya?"

Of course, exciting topics like that are bound to bring out the flamers.

Mark; to keep the topic on topic will usually mean ignoring those who mentioned. Why not send them a pm and tell them how you really feel and inform them that you are blocking any further chit chat with them via pm.

I thought about that but not everyone is always stupid. Some people are only part time ignorant bigots. Or perhaps only bigoted in an area of personal tension like sexuality.

If I were to put them on ignore maybe I would miss a great shopping source or valuable INTERNET experience or a health tip that may save my life.

Or maybe deep down inside they have some saving grace like liking cats or subconscious S&M tendencies.

I have only tried to PM one time when faced with a argument. I didn't want to post my reply because it may have proved harmful to TV. I was met with a very negative response. It made me gun-shy.

A lot of young guys here on TV have a real problem with older men dating younger women. They get all bent out of shape about it. It is understandable. Many young men have lost their wives or sweethearts to older mongers through the bar industry. They have been emotionally scarred for life.

I almost hate to even respond to something which is obviously an open wound.

I ask how to respond to flames. Response, don't post topics that encourage flames. Hmmm.

sbk is right, Mark. It's best to post interesting topics such as "Where can I get a Pad Thai in Pattaya?" or, "Is there bus transport every day from Bangkok to Pattaya?"

Of course, exciting topics like that are bound to bring out the flamers.

I was thinking of posting only in the farming forum. But I fear if I posted a topic on diseases of jasmine rice I would get a reply like, “you dirty old perv, why don't you take your potbelly back to Yankee land and stop bothering our young tender rice plants. If it weren't for the Vietnam war there would be no problems with jasmine rice at all. Why do you yanks think you can come over here and tell us how to grow rice? Nobody thinks your rice has a disease anyway. We all know you make stuff up to make yourself look like a big wheel. How dare you post in the farming forum. You have the rest of Thai Visa to post your sexist anti farming posts anyway."

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.

Proverbs 15:1

Mark; to keep the topic on topic will usually mean ignoring those who mentioned. Why not send them a pm and tell them how you really feel and inform them that you are blocking any further chit chat with them via pm.

you may find they block your abilty to pm them.

maybe the rule should be that if you block a poster from pm'ng you you can not see or respond to his posts

The next Thai Visa party announcement, have a member note they have won a prize which they can claim at said party. When they arrival you can spring your ambush and have your way with him/her. Can I watch?

The best way to slow down flamers is to treat them with respect. Most flames start with someone making a put-down of someone's view on a topic. Because someone knows less about a subject than I do, doesn't mean they are stupid. It simply means they less about that particular subject. Prejudices and stereotypes are best ignored.

Showing some respect for the opinion of other posters, not getting personal and not responding to personal attacks goes along way to reducing flames.

And some threads just continue long after their expiration date. Everyone has stated their case and there is no information. Then it's time to move on.

And some threads just continue long after their expiration date. Everyone has stated their case and there is no information. Then it's time to move on.

I've noticed a few moderators doing just that recently. Once everyone has had their say and it gets down to a bickering match between just a few people then the thread has run its course.

No it hasn't.

No it hasn't.

I tend to agree with Moonrakers on this one.

I have also had an epiphany moment. I have started to use the report button. I am reporting all the posts that are off topic or against TV rules.

Posting or responding to a message in a way clearly intended to incite useless arguments, to launch personal attacks, to insult, or to be hateful towards other members. This includes useless criticism, name-calling, swearing and any other comments meant to incite anger. purposefully antagonizing other people on the internet by posting controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant or off-topic messages with the primary intent of provoking other users into an emotional response or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion. Post slurs or degrading comments directed towards any group on the basis of race, nationality, religion, gender or sexual orientation.

I am going to be a good, re born again TV poster.

I even think this post may be against the rules so I am going to report it. I argued with myself if I should report myself. And I won.

No it hasn't.

I tend to agree with Moonrakers on this one.

I have also had an epiphany moment. I have started to use the report button. I am reporting all the posts that are off topic or against TV rules.

Posting or responding to a message in a way clearly intended to incite useless arguments, to launch personal attacks, to insult, or to be hateful towards other members. This includes useless criticism, name-calling, swearing and any other comments meant to incite anger. purposefully antagonizing other people on the internet by posting controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant or off-topic messages with the primary intent of provoking other users into an emotional response or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion. Post slurs or degrading comments directed towards any group on the basis of race, nationality, religion, gender or sexual orientation.

I am going to be a good, re born again TV poster.

I even think this post may be against the rules so I am going to report it. I argued with myself if I should report myself. And I won.

I'll report it for you, Mark, and you can report everything that I post. I certainly started a controversial post in the Chiang Mai forum.