Helping Or Walk Away

[elgato]

Your setting yourself up for a sting and it won't be carried out by friendly troops.

Agreed - best to avoid a situation like this.

[IanForbes]

Might be best to guide her to an organisation that cna help her, like the Prateep Foundation: http://www.dpf.or.th/eng/Projects.html

Mario gave the only practical answer. Many of us when we first came to Thailand wanted to help the unforunates. However, after a while we had to learn the system and how it works in Thailand. I have helped many Thais in need of a bit of support. Some times you get stung, but sometimes you get rewarded with positive results. You can't help everyone in this world. There are just too many with problems. But, if you can help just one or two then you've done what you can. Some people dedicate their whole life to helping others... Mother Teresa comes to mind, but that doesn't mean the rest of us have to follow her example to the same degree. Unfortunately, there are so many "White Knights" who have tried helping damsels in distress, and then get stung, that it hardens their hearts and turns them bitter. If you actually want to help then pick out one or two and help them help themselves. There will always be more losses than gains, but don't let it bother you.

[kerryk]

Go go's are too loud to talk in so I am assuming you took her out of the go go. If she was 16 or 17 with make up you would not have asked her if she was underage because she could probably pass for 25 so I'll assume she is 15. Assuming she lived with you for a while and you packed her belongings in a suitcase and put her on the bus to Issan. Now she is back home and called you for some more cash. You can marry her at 16 or pay allowance for three years till she is old enough to be a GF with parental consent. Either way you have made a commitment when you made the initial payment and sent her home.

[bendejo]

Went out for a night with a mate, arrived at a go go bar.

Talking with a girl she was underage.

Give her some money to go home and promise her to help her.

I don’t know if this was a smart move from me, i would like to keep my promise as i always do.

So you went to a place where sex is for sale, was approached by a girl who told you she was underage, and after a few minutes you handed her some money. Best not to mention such things to others.

I understand your intentions, OP, but these things can be taken out of context.

Edited October 2, 2011 by bendejo

[pacman32]

Go go's are too loud to talk in so I am assuming you took her out of the go go. If she was 16 or 17 with make up you would not have asked her if she was underage because she could probably pass for 25 so I'll assume she is 15. Assuming she lived with you for a while and you packed her belongings in a suitcase and put her on the bus to Issan. Now she is back home and called you for some more cash. You can marry her at 16 or pay allowance for three years till she is old enough to be a GF with parental consent. Either way you have made a commitment when you made the initial payment and sent her home.

yeah theres a word for that what begins with "P"

like someone said before, if you are in the bar then you are part of the problem......just ask yourself mr white knight, why were you in there in the 1st place and why were you talking to a child

seriously this post must be a joke, has no one noticed the ops not been back since it was started

or is he just too embarresed lol.

[IanForbes]

Go go's are too loud to talk in so I am assuming you took her out of the go go. If she was 16 or 17 with make up you would not have asked her if she was underage because she could probably pass for 25 so I'll assume she is 15. Assuming she lived with you for a while and you packed her belongings in a suitcase and put her on the bus to Issan. Now she is back home and called you for some more cash. You can marry her at 16 or pay allowance for three years till she is old enough to be a GF with parental consent. Either way you have made a commitment when you made the initial payment and sent her home.

yeah theres a word for that what begins with "P"

like someone said before, if you are in the bar then you are part of the problem......just ask yourself mr white knight, why were you in there in the 1st place and why were you talking to a child

seriously this post must be a joke, has no one noticed the ops not been back since it was started

or is he just too embarresed lol.

Well, there are always the holier than thou crowd whose poop doesn't smell. There's Nothing wrong with bars or those that frequent them providing they don't hurt anyone else. As soon as you stand on the pulpit preaching about the wrongs of others you leave yourself open to attack. I'm sure there are few million Muslims who think everyone who takes a drink of alcohol should be put to death. That doesn't make it correct. I know a young woman of 14 who works part time in a friend's bar and I defy any stranger to guess her age correctly. She looks about 22, and older than some of the other girls who are in their mid twenties. And, she DOESN'T go wtih men. I know that for a fact because the bar owner and his wife take care of her like a daughter.

[manarak]

err.. read OP's post and was a bit.. umm... surprised.

- OP is not known for trolling - check.

- date is clearly distinct from April 1st - check.

- OP has been living in the LOS for a long time - check.

err...

1- define "underage" ?

2- give her money to go home ??

this has to be in the "very silly" category.

not only will she be back the next day, but OP would be taking risks if the story is true and the management hears about this.

Then there are the usual puritans like Johnniey who like to mix up prostitution with underage prostitution, pedos, etc...

Surely.

How hypocritical - you feel good now about helping one underage gogo girl while you barfine her sister.

Can't you see that you are supporting this prostitution industry by being in the go go bar?

I'm not against prostitution - as I think it is part of any "normal" community.

In fact, if there weren't the bars, I wouldn't have met many very charming girls.

I am against prostitution of underage girls because they didn't have time to develop their mind.

[kerryk]

err.. read OP's post and was a bit.. umm... surprised.

- OP is not known for trolling - check.

- date is clearly distinct from April 1st - check.

- OP has been living in the LOS for a long time - check.

err...

1- define "underage" ?

2- give her money to go home ??

this has to be in the "very silly" category.

not only will she be back the next day, but OP would be taking risks if the story is true and the management hears about this.

Then there are the usual puritans like Johnniey who like to mix up prostitution with underage prostitution, pedos, etc...

Surely.

How hypocritical - you feel good now about helping one underage gogo girl while you barfine her sister.

Can't you see that you are supporting this prostitution industry by being in the go go bar?

I'm not against prostitution - as I think it is part of any "normal" community.

In fact, if there weren't the bars, I wouldn't have met many very charming girls.

I am against prostitution of underage girls because they didn't have time to develop their mind.

You know I thought Johnniey was against prostitution too. Then I read a post of his in another thread and I quote, "I have absolutely nothing against prostitution. Of course I accept it. I've had good friends who were prostitutes in this country and my original one." So I guess Johnniey is just a punter like all the rest.

[SteeleJoe]

maybe she is telling the truth . there are lots of bars that will take them on under age, And many bars are owned by police men , or taken care of.. maybe the sex tourist should hang the heads in shame of bringing this situation about.

1) I highly doubt there are many go go bars that will deliberately hire underage girls.

2) Given that...

-- the sector of the sex industry that caters to Thais is often far worse (and far, far larger) and is said to have a much greater prevalence of underage girls.

-- It is more often Thais that are running these bars (ad Thai police allowing it according to you)

-- The sex industry predates sex tourism and would exist without it.

...sex tourists didn't bring this situation about. And aren't the only ones who deserve to hang their head in same.

[SteeleJoe]

They all lie about everything. My friend was with a 19 year old who turned out to be 34. Old farang can't tell the difference

Is this a math riddle?

Only when she is sitting on a train traveling at 80mph in a westerly direction, and that train left 4 hours before the train the OP is sitting on traveling in an easterly direction at 92mph.

Samran more information needed = steam or diesel, gradients and most of all is it dual or single track - if it is the latter when they meet the outcome will be well advertised.

You people are dumb. The answer is obviously 26.483 on Tuesday.

[SteeleJoe]

An off topic but somewhat related tangent. We're in the process of seizing a home and adjacent property from a guy who had apparently though it was better to leave his first local wife because of parasitic inlaws for a new local wife that was indeed effectively an orphan (as per common conventional 'wisdom' posted on these forums). Didn't end well. She gambled (and apparently had a few local guys on the side under her care) a fairly large home, multiple automobiles, and half a dozen shophouses built by said gentleman and is now basically destitute. The guy at least isn't skinnt (like the property we seized from a less fortunate Brit last year) and is now back with his first wife. Beware fleeing from a lion into the mouth of a crocodile as the local saying goes.

It's "fleeing from a tiger". (Thailand never had lions).

[thejcb]

my advice, leave it alone, walk away from it, dont talk to it , dont give it money !

Easy, then you dont have any problem and you can sleep at night

[Tanaka]

An off topic but somewhat related tangent. We're in the process of seizing a home and adjacent property from a guy who had apparently though it was better to leave his first local wife because of parasitic inlaws for a new local wife that was indeed effectively an orphan (as per common conventional 'wisdom' posted on these forums). Didn't end well. She gambled (and apparently had a few local guys on the side under her care) a fairly large home, multiple automobiles, and half a dozen shophouses built by said gentleman and is now basically destitute. The guy at least isn't skinnt (like the property we seized from a less fortunate Brit last year) and is now back with his first wife. Beware fleeing from a lion into the mouth of a crocodile as the local saying goes.

It's "fleeing from a tiger". (Thailand never had lions).

Ha! You never met my sister-in-law!

[Ijustwannateach]

It is a dangerous and usually doomed project when someone decides they can 'save' someone else, or imagines they have that kind of power over the life of another.

[marstons]

giving her money just gives her another reason to stay. 100% dont walk away just dont care, wasting you time and money, understand how you feel though.

[jackr]

maybe the sex tourist should hang the heads in shame of bringing this situation about.

If you actually believe that then you seriously need to gen-up or wake up.

Op; nice gesture but you're opening a can of worms... just the act of giving money to an underage pro (take it you saw her ID card) is surely not a good idea.

[Chupup]

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, if she is underage Walk Away

[brewsterbudgen]

yeah theres a word for that what begins with "P"

like someone said before, if you are in the bar then you are part of the problem......just ask yourself mr white knight, why were you in there in the 1st place and why were you talking to a child

seriously this post must be a joke, has no one noticed the ops not been back since it was started

or is he just too embarresed lol.

So, what is the 'P' word? I doubt that the girl in question was pre-pubescent, so it can't be paedophile. Maybe a priest?

[Heng]

An off topic but somewhat related tangent. We're in the process of seizing a home and adjacent property from a guy who had apparently though it was better to leave his first local wife because of parasitic inlaws for a new local wife that was indeed effectively an orphan (as per common conventional 'wisdom' posted on these forums). Didn't end well. She gambled (and apparently had a few local guys on the side under her care) a fairly large home, multiple automobiles, and half a dozen shophouses built by said gentleman and is now basically destitute. The guy at least isn't skinnt (like the property we seized from a less fortunate Brit last year) and is now back with his first wife. Beware fleeing from a lion into the mouth of a crocodile as the local saying goes.

It's "fleeing from a tiger". (Thailand never had lions).

Well spotted.

[plumeria]

I've never met a person working in the sex industry who was forced into it.

I'm sure it happens but every person I ever met was a volunteer.

And I've never met any who were interested in getting "straightened out" by an association or other do-gooders.

Working long hours at a hard job that requires effort and brains and thinking and a routine for relatively low pay is not very interesting to sex workers.

Lots of sex, drugs and money tends to be the choice, even for girls with degrees saving to get a MS degree in California.

[ranabd]

Face is the first index of a man. So you should take decision what should do. Because you are the viewer of the girl.

[fancyking]

hello no dont tell me , you guys here really belive he did that ??

[hotandhumid]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Seriously, these forums should only be for under 10's or the mentally challenged.

[StreetCowboy]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Seriously, these forums should only be for under 10's or the mentally challenged.

Sorry, mate, we can't all focus on your needs only.

SC

[StreetCowboy]

I think it was a good thing that you did. Especially, if you felt good about it. However, as most of the posts say, "once you start down that road " . But, if it made you feel good and that you were doing the right thing at the time, maybe you were and maybe she just took the money and ate and went home. However, like most of the advise given I wouldn't get into a habit of falling in love at first sight or whatever or giving out too much help, as you can be sure if you return to the same bar in a week, she will probably be there.

From time to time people say something helpful...

As he says: if you do it with a good heart, then its not doing you any harm; if she needs help, its doing her good, and if she doesn't want help, she's beyond being damaged by the money.

If stupid or wicked people suffer from your good intentions (even if they think that they benefit) then that is their problem. But a good person might benefit.

Of course, you cannot tell the difference, so I would recommend giving the money and walking away and putting it behind you, believing a job well done.

I wouldn't let some anonymous cabalero tell you what to do either. You should make up your own mind.

SC

[IanForbes]

I think it was a good thing that you did. Especially, if you felt good about it. However, as most of the posts say, "once you start down that road " . But, if it made you feel good and that you were doing the right thing at the time, maybe you were and maybe she just took the money and ate and went home. However, like most of the advise given I wouldn't get into a habit of falling in love at first sight or whatever or giving out too much help, as you can be sure if you return to the same bar in a week, she will probably be there.

From time to time people say something helpful...

As he says: if you do it with a good heart, then its not doing you any harm; if she needs help, its doing her good, and if she doesn't want help, she's beyond being damaged by the money.

If stupid or wicked people suffer from your good intentions (even if they think that they benefit) then that is their problem. But a good person might benefit.

Of course, you cannot tell the difference, so I would recommend giving the money and walking away and putting it behind you, believing a job well done.

I wouldn't let some anonymous cabalero tell you what to do either. You should make up your own mind.

SC

Exactly the point I always try to make with everyone. Don't spend more than you can't afford to lose and don't have great expectations. When I've felt like it I've taken druggies for a meal on a rainy day. I know they aren't going to change, but maybe for 20 minutes they will be comfortable.

[johnboy3739w]

mess 9...........

my TGF told me she was 28 when i met her - turns out she was 27 - i wasn't happy.....................

[needforspeed]

Might be best to guide her to an organisation that cna help her, like the Prateep Foundation: http://www.dpf.or.th/eng/Projects.html

Thanks, send them a e mail already.

[HeavyDrinker]

Only when she is sitting on a train traveling at 80mph in a westerly direction,

Since when has a Thai train ever hit 80mph Samran???

I've met many a "Knight in Shining Armour" over the years.

While their hearts are in the right place, sadly the other half of the act's seldom is.

You gave her some money. Job done. Now point her in the direction of someone who can really help like Empower and walk away mate.

Good on you! Nice to see that there are people concerned with the welfare of others around.

[Berkshire]

Face is the first index of a man. So you should take decision what should do. Because you are the viewer of the girl.

Any chance you can translate this to English?