Not Allowed To Have Fun In Thailand.

[theblether]

I've noticed a weird thing recently, and that's the amount of guys who need to ask permission to go out. We had a topic a while ago about control freak farangs, but I'm seeing the opposite.

There's something disconcerting too about seeing a grown man asking if he's allowed to have a third beer. I'd rather top myself than be controlled to that extent.

I remember years ago reading a phrase which was " inside every German there's a hidden policeman "", I'm now starting to think that " inside every Thai lady there's a hidden prison officer ".

Maybe that's an exaggeration but I see too many examples of guys playing second fiddle. surely you've sussed by now that you are the prize, and you call the tune?

Ps Live a year in Germany and you'll soon find out how true that saying is.

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Edited April 26, 2013 by theblether

[manarak]

It's called being whipped and enjoying it.

[chiang mai]

You're bored today, I can tell!

[theblether]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

[Hedghog]

Lived six years in Germany.

Never new any closet policeman.

[Bangkokhatter]

While i doubt my girlfriend sees me as some kind of prize, she would never attempt to tell me whether i could go for some beers or not. These things have to be explained early doors, maybe some blokes fear the wrath of the dreaded Thai lady. I say get yourself down the pub and let her deal with it.

[nickmanchester2]

yeah, I know one guy who has a girl that will not let him stay out long - if its more time than she thinks is a reasonable amount, she calls him up and tells him she is going to smash everything up in the condo!

[Hedghog]

I would rather upset a Thai lassie.

Than a Scottish one.

[chiang mai]

Lived six years in Germany.

Never new any closet policeman.

My best friend, a Brit, lived there for thirty five years, his major gripe was that, "everyone wants to be a policeman".

[Phronesis]

Farangs hand over their balls to their Thai wife at precisely the same moment her name is stamped on the title to the house.

[Scully]

I thought all women did that?

You do have a point though, they try to mother you, think you are sleeping with half the town and then start to smother you. That's just the mother in law, don't get me started on the girlfriend.

[HardenedSoul]

Maybe that's an exaggeration but I see too many examples of guys playing second fiddle. surely you've sussed by now that you are the prize, and you call the tune?

Well that's just the point, isn't it? So many Western men here with women possessed of aesthetics way over their paygrade are most certainly not the prize.

The fact they know that their women know it and could trade them in for a richer/younger/more interesting man without too much trouble could have something to do with their excessive deference.

Oh and let's not forget; some guys actually like being bossed around by their women.

[mauGR1]

They are just trying to protect you from the dangers of the world..

[theblether]

Phronesis has a point, why would you want to lose control like that?

[stiggy]

I believe the appropriate term is PWMF

[robblok]

Ah some guys are just easily dominated and some even like it. On the other hand I can see the point of not wanting a drunk husband all the time.

[thequietman]

Also I noticed, the worst culprits are ex- military/armed forces.

Something to do with them been told what to do while in service and so it continues in civilian life.

[patongphil]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

Ask the missus if you can go out

[Loptr]

It's called self-preservation of one's manly parts.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/04/26/lawyer-says-s-calif-woman-who-cut-off-husband-penis-had-break-from-reality/

You have to watch out when women have a "break from reality".

[NanLaew]

Girlfriends and wives can be the same anywhere so sorry, it aint uniquely a Thai thing at all. But since it does happen here and the OP is a tad bored (and I reckon he's got a valid point), it is worth al least a couple of three pages. So here's my take.

I reckon apart from the guys who like being pussy whipped (you know who you are), most other chaps experience these attempts at 'control' every so often. Diplomacy usually works unless the partner is some sort of bunny boiler (like the one mentioned earlier that says she is going to trash the flat) and real men don't put up with this. Personally, I administer 'attitude adjustments' and for the most part, they work. These are non-physical adjustments and can vary widely depending on the type of relationship, the circumstances as well as what activity the female partner is objecting about. Here are samples of what I have had to do or 'give up' in order to maintain my (relative) freedom over the past 30-odd.

Left the country - Wannabe GF found me in bed with GF. BOTH threw hissy fits but BOTH wanted to meet me at the airport when I returned to the US.

A new fridge - broke up 2 weeks later and my buddy married her 2 weeks after that (dodged THAT bullet).

Turned my phone off - drove her mental... unfortunately.

Walking the dog - I don't really like dogs but he would happily sit in the back of the truck when I went to the bar.

Engagement ring - yes, that was a mistake but gave me about 16 months off the leash so to speak.

Learn line dancing - The 'Aikey Breaky Heart' is a ball-breaker and IMHO, country girls just aint all that.

Grew a mustache - Oh boy, she HATED that! Said I looked like Sean Connery's father.

Take the boy with me when shopping - Bonus! He is a wee pussy magnet but now he speaks all the time, I have to be VERY subtle.

Flew with TAA - The GF at the time was an air hostess with Ansett (Oooohhh, that dates me doesn't it?).

[arthurwait]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

Ask the missus if you can go out

He wears the skirt in his house.

[arthurwait]

Seen it here and at home.

Here it's golddigging girlfriends only interested in the their money and at home with girls that seemed to have no friends of their own, I wonder why.

[homeownership]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

You dont know what trouble is my friend.

Ive used an avatar of a real person. Bragged about my wealth and generally pished off the entire membership of TVF.

I'm laying low for a while. Might try reading and not posting for a bit.

[BookMan]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

You dont know what trouble is my friend.

Ive used an avatar of a real person. Bragged about my wealth and generally pished off the entire membership of TVF.

I'm laying low for a while. Might try reading and not posting for a bit.

Interesting...but more importantly are you allowed to stay out for a third beer?

[theblether]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

You dont know what trouble is my friend.

Ive used an avatar of a real person. Bragged about my wealth and generally pished off the entire membership of TVF.

I'm laying low for a while. Might try reading and not posting for a bit.

Ahem.....you do know it's theblether your talking to? You are a mere grasshopper compared to me.

@Nanlaew 55555 brilliant

[homeownership]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

You dont know what trouble is my friend.

Ive used an avatar of a real person. Bragged about my wealth and generally pished off the entire membership of TVF.

I'm laying low for a while. Might try reading and not posting for a bit.

Interesting...but more importantly are you allowed to stay out for a third beer?

Yes but I dont have a Thai Wife.

[muythai2013]

Farangs hand over their balls to their Thai wife at precisely the same moment her name is stamped on the title to the house.

That is the farangs that are silly enough to buy one.

[swissie]

Farangs hand over their balls to their Thai wife at precisely the same moment her name is stamped on the title to the house.

Especially is this true, if the farang invests 90% of his assets in the house and declares to the wife: "From now on, we will live happily ever after on my modest pension!"

- But, sorry to say, I made the same observation like the OP!

Cheers.

[NanLaew]

You're bored today, I can tell!

To be fair it's pouring with rain outside. Plus I had to think of a serious subject cos I keep getting in trouble for banter.

That's me in trouble again :-(

You dont know what trouble is my friend.

Ive used an avatar of a real person. Bragged about my wealth and generally pished off the entire membership of TVF.

I'm laying low for a while. Might try reading and not posting for a bit.

All your misdemeanors are inconsequential IMHO. I have just friended the OP so that's you both buggered!

[theblether]

The gold digging aspect is interesting arthurwait, obviously the foundations of the relationship are built on quicksand from the start.

In defence of guys who fall for it, many are lambs to the slaughter. I can remember going back on the dating game after a 17 year relationship, and I felt like a lamb to the slaughter myself. My first date/ girlfriend was perfect for me at that time, slightly mad, great fun, and after 3 months with her I was back in the game.

But this brings me back to my OP, in this game, we are the prize......why do so many guys fall into the trap of being controlled?

Nanlaew made a valid point, basically just learn to say you ain't getting away with behaviour from the start.

When I first started reading TV someone wrote, I apologize I can't remember who, " always remember, your Thai lady doesn't want to lose you ".

That stuck in my mind, and excepting some wilful/criminal/evil exceptions, I would say it's broadly true.

You are the prize, never ever lose the control battle. Ever.

Edited April 26, 2013 by theblether