When is the right time, what was it for you ?

[Wat dee]

Your question OP:

"My question is, when and why is the right time to cut that final bridge to the homeland ?"

My answer:

Never.

Don't believe, a minute, what the posters say, about their homeland.

Doesn't matter for how long you have been living in Thailand and how happy you are, you always think of your homeland.

May be, conditions of living and circumstances are better than your homecountry.

But you never forget and sometimes, hoped that you could be back if circumstances were different.

Try to say something nasty about others homeland.......and they will be up in arms trying to eat you alive.

That shows a lot.

Sorry Costas. Not much left! Most of it divided by honest and hard working union members, due unpaid loans!

Lesbo's still there , have fun!

[marko kok prong]

I came here and spent 3 months with my wife[then gf] initially to see if i could live in a thai village luckily there are a lot of other expats around this area,after 3 months i went back to Aus,sold everything and came back,i really did not have a choice as my ex was trying to take everything from me ,she had most of it already,i now have a good wife, an easy life and a better social life than i had in Australia,i miss somethings about Australia,like the space and lack of litter,but for me it was better to have no possesions back there that way you have to commit to your decision,also it can be a very liberating feeling ,selling or giving away accumulated stuff you have built up over 15 years,i think i sent about 8 medium sized post boxes here everything else i got rid off you actually realise most of this stuff really not needed.Have been here two years now and feel pretty much at home.

[laobali]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Agree with everything you say, except for your last sentence, as a Republican I was almost going to disagree, however the more I thought of it, the more I agree, the longer "Lizzy" stays on the throne means less time on it for the idiot who will follow.

GSTQ.

Who follows will not change anything - for good or bad.

[slipperylobster]

The best part of living in Thailand would be the ability not to make it the final place of living. Options are what make life interesting. Burning your bridges...such as running short of funds ever to return, evading taxes/criminal charges, letting your visa and passport foolishly expire, and ruining your health here.... well the thought of that is unsettling, to say the least.

[HeavyDrinker]

Some stellar advice here. I'd agree utterly with the over riding sentiment here; as in don't 'burn the bridges'. We've been here 20+ years now but still have our house in the UK, pay out NI stamp etc as you never know what the future holds

The only thing I own here is me dog and the wife would probably dispute that unless he's farting or being naughty as he is today.....

[deepcell]

Burn Bridges is not a good idea unless you do not have any friends or family, but in that case nothing remained. huh? Do you want to put all your friends and family in a trash bin?

[deepcell]

Just curious, for US citizens would burning those bridges mean no more tax return filings?

[iamariva1957]

Just my thoughts on this one. The OP has a good question and one that could involve a volume or two in responses. But here is how I see it:

• Never ever burn a bridge back to what was once your "home". You never know when you will need it to be there and give you a place to escape whatever you feel you have to from.
• You will always, at times, long for home. The memories that it supplies and the life you once had there.
• You will always have that passport that will allow you the 'protection' it gives you.... that is if you are thinking of giving it back with your cutting ties with 'home'.
• You will always be a Farang here no matter if you speak and/or write the lingo, spent 20+ years here, have a Thai family, or start to dress the part. Your real origins will never escape you or to the eyes of the real locals.

Oh, there is more as I said, but my fingers hurt!

[iamariva1957]

Just curious, for US citizens would burning those bridges mean no more tax return filings?

No... you still have to do the filing. But as a foreign resident you get a shit load off your taxes! That is a good thing! A very good thing!!!

[Showbags]

The taxman might burn my bridge for me one day.

[Jim in Chiang Mai]

Great question! … must be tumbling around in many expat's minds … it sure has been on my mind! Very impressed with the thoughtful well reasoned comments.

For you, the answer might be, not when or why is the right time …. reminds me of Yoda,“NO! Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.” It seems to consciously cut the tie, or burn the bridge … is for the "Western mind", a need for a reason .. a plan … an objective … a purpose. Can it, for you, come to wither away or drift away from caring? … or to live in the now or the present? … some might call an "Eastern" view? Time is not perceived the same in various cultures/minds …

If there is some compelling reason, like avoiding taxes, I suppose the facts dictate. (I feel uncomfortable living to avoid being a contributing member of the society that pays my pension, even though I expect to never return. Never is a long time. Like another commenter, I'll keep my citizenship.) For you, IF it is an emotional decision (emotions are thoughts in motion) then there must still be feelings and caring? … or have they just about gone dormant? Up to you "they" say here.

Destruction of a bridge or anything is different; destruction requires intent, and has a motivation. I do not sense that is what you are asking.

For me, I had lived here for several years in my youth; had a couple careers in the US; retired; struggled helping my farang wife with a disability; struggled in losing our investment in a dream home that devalued 60% … we are financial refugees with my pension and her social security … slowly paying off the last of the debts …. living here since January, 2013 because I want to be here; we have Thai Retirement A-O visas, and recognize we are guests in the Kingdom, and can happily keep our place. My father died after we arrived so we went back … it was the end of the close family for me. We never had kids. I am not fond of what my homeland has changed into the last couple of decades, so I can be happy here or somewhere other than there, until I die. I can cut the ties or let the communications/friendships wither away … I'm seeing and feeling the slow drift. The pensions will sustain us here; we will hopefully be debt free by the end of this year; but we will never be able to buy a residence again. I just have no reason to not just let time happen … if there is a bridge unused is it a bridge? But my good farang wife of 37 years … she can not let go. Family ties are alive and well. She will not likely ever be comfortable with the cultural differences …. we are evolving into her traveling back twice a year … maybe until her mother dies. For her there will never be a right time to cut that final bridge. She will return when I die.

[dotpoom]

A good topic Charlie and some really interesting contributions. I enjoyed learning other people's views on this matter as I never think along these lines myself. Let me explain......I have spent most of my adult life learning how to live in and focus on the, "now" as much as i possibly can. A simple reason for this....I discovered that up until that point I had been living either regretting the past or being anxious about the future....and was totally missing the "present" (I had many problems in my life). Now I try to get every last ounce of joy out of life in this very moment, wherever life has taken me. That's why I found it so easy to move here. I'm aware that nothing in life is permanent and I knew that if I didn't like it here I could always go back, nothing is set in concrete. For me ...it's not my problems or situations that are big or small but my attitude towards them that makes them either one.

Breaking off ties etc., I see more as mental state rather than a physical one. At times I can feel very close to people at home and yet be here, whilst before I came here I could feel very disconnected from them and be right among them.

I have no place to live in my home country now but this I never even consider...I have a home here and a good partner and for that I am eternally grateful. I have everything I need today....what more could a person ask for.

[bob strutt]

what a great question, i personally new when it was time, i took a thai wife her 3 kids to aus , gave them the chance of a life time, will not bore you with the full story , i am well off, but she was a bangkok hooker from euikami, enough said, they all failed miserably, i ended up in hostpidal with a heart attack, massive stress, came back to pattaya to get away from the stress, in 2 days had met the most beautiful thai girl, black eyes bruises, married to a pom 45, i needed some one to bash so i took on her case, we have been together now for 4 years, found her son in bangkok, up a tree hiding, the pom had treated him really badly, was keeping for employment and visa purposes, the mother was scared shitless,the police and child people were fabulous, he died,sex drugs rock and roll, an arse hole, she is the most loving person i have ever been with, i am a 67 year old rouge, together, we have built a house, her son is my son, is now growing into a wonderful human being and our village has prospered from my desicion to move permanately, took 3 years, but i know this is forever, i love it here and will never go back, there are a lot of good people in this country , you just have to find them, soi 6 at pattaya is not the place to start looking bobs

[Showbags]

what a great question, i personally new when it was time, i took a thai wife her 3 kids to aus , gave them the chance of a life time, will not bore you with the full story , i am well off, but she was a bangkok hooker from euikami, enough said, they all failed miserably, i ended up in hostpidal with a heart attack, massive stress, came back to pattaya to get away from the stress, in 2 days had met the most beautiful thai girl, black eyes bruises, married to a pom 45, i needed some one to bash so i took on her case, we have been together now for 4 years, found her son in bangkok, up a tree hiding, the pom had treated him really badly, was keeping for employment and visa purposes, the mother was scared shitless,the police and child people were fabulous, he died,sex drugs rock and roll, an arse hole, she is the most loving person i have ever been with, i am a 67 year old rouge, together, we have built a house, her son is my son, is now growing into a wonderful human being and our village has prospered from my desicion to move permanately, took 3 years, but i know this is forever, i love it here and will never go back, there are a lot of good people in this country , you just have to find them, soi 6 at pattaya is not the place to start looking bobs

A whole village taking advantage of you...thats a new twist.

[geronimo]

I left England 40 years ago, when I was 18 and then spent the next ten years looking for the place to live, then I found Thailand!

[NoshowJones]

I was just glad to get the chance to leave the vastly overtaxed UK to come and live here for good and cut off all ties. Best thing I ever did, apart from some family, I have no ties at all with the UK Thank God.

[Neeranam]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

[HardenedSoul]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

See ya. Wouldn't wanna be ya

[Neeranam]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

See ya. Wouldn't wanna be ya

What on earth is that supposed to mean?

[Neeranam]

what a great question, i personally new when it was time, i took a thai wife her 3 kids to aus , gave them the chance of a life time, will not bore you with the full story , i am well off, but she was a bangkok hooker from euikami, enough said, they all failed miserably, i ended up in hostpidal with a heart attack, massive stress, came back to pattaya to get away from the stress, in 2 days had met the most beautiful thai girl, black eyes bruises, married to a pom 45, i needed some one to bash so i took on her case, we have been together now for 4 years, found her son in bangkok, up a tree hiding, the pom had treated him really badly, was keeping for employment and visa purposes, the mother was scared shitless,the police and child people were fabulous, he died,sex drugs rock and roll, an arse hole, she is the most loving person i have ever been with, i am a 67 year old rouge, together, we have built a house, her son is my son, is now growing into a wonderful human being and our village has prospered from my desicion to move permanately, took 3 years, but i know this is forever, i love it here and will never go back, there are a lot of good people in this country , you just have to find them, soi 6 at pattaya is not the place to start looking bobs

I'd have thought soi 6 was the perfect place if you want to marry a hooker, bring up her kid and be the village idiot.

[HardenedSoul]

It means goodbye. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes when your inept Alex Salmond finds himself and his cowboy administration unable to deal with the real problems the union has insulated you from for generations.

Or put bluntly, piss off; you'll be crawling back inside 5 years

Edited March 15, 2014 by HardenedSoul

[Neeranam]

It means goodbye. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes when your inept Alex Salmond finds himself and his cowboy administration find themselves unable to deal with the real problems the union has insulated you from for generations.

Or put bluntly, piss off; you'll be crawling back inside 5 years

How rude and off topic. Do you really think we ever wanted to be part of your union?

[NoshowJones]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

I really enjoy your posts Neeranam, but I have to say I am not proud of Scotland, I hope Scotland will be independent soon too, but it is not going to happen, and that is the reason I am not a proud Scot.

If on September Scotland becomes an independent country, then I will be a proud Scot, but because the majority of Scots will not vote for independence, and what you said "they have robbed us off so much" I have to say I am ashamed to be a Scot.

[robertthebruce]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

See ya. Wouldn't wanna be ya

What on earth is that supposed to mean?

This forum cheers me up no end, some class comments... makes you laugh.. just loving it...

[lanng khao]

It'll never happen.

I don't intend to remain here forever

I most certainly don't intend to settle down with a Thai woman

For all of my homeland's woes, I owe much of what I am and what I have to the realm and the notion of cutting ties to that in favour of a country where the law is but a suggestion and an education of any acceptable standard is a privilege is, frankly, unthinkable.

Yes I love living in Thailand. I still find its pros outweigh its cons by a very comfortable ratio but I can never forget my first, true love; Great Britain.

God Save The Queen

Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

I really enjoy your posts Neeranam, but I have to say I am not proud of Scotland, I hope Scotland will be independent soon too, but it is not going to happen, and that is the reason I am not a proud Scot.

If on September Scotland becomes an independent country, then I will be a proud Scot, but because the majority of Scots will not vote for independence, and what you said "they have robbed us off so much" I have to say I am ashamed to be a Scot.

you'll never leave the Bucky..

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[robertthebruce]

I would never cut ties with my Homeland, but would never go back there to live, Too Cold... and Too Expensive..

Thailand works for me, and gives me an excellent quality of life second to none...

I do go back for a visit quite regularly but always glad to leave and head back here...

Life is short, be happy where ever one be , and enjoy it......

[HardenedSoul]

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Great Britain should just be called Britain these days. Hopefully my country will have independence from it soon - they have robbed us of so much. I am proud of Scotland and wouldn't want to cut all ties with her.

It means goodbye. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes when your inept Alex Salmond finds himself and his cowboy administration find themselves unable to deal with the real problems the union has insulated you from for generations.

Or put bluntly, piss off; you'll be crawling back inside 5 years

How rude and off topic. Do you really think we ever wanted to be part of your union?

"How rude", you say??!!

"Off topic", you say

Maybe you should put down the Jack Daniels, mate.

You brought up the issue of devolution but a couple of posts ago or perhaps, in your stupor, you don't remember. Never mind; I've quoted it above

[wym]

Just curious, for US citizens would burning those bridges mean no more tax return filings?

No... you still have to do the filing. But as a foreign resident you get a shit load off your taxes! That is a good thing! A very good thing!!!

I think you missed the point. He's saying getting in deep sh1t with the IRS is the most effective method to ensure you can't go home.

But I was surprised to learn that 15 years of not having filed was greeted by "mai bpen rai" when I inquired, my income's been under the threshold, apparently won't even have any fines.

Edited March 15, 2014 by wym

[iamariva1957]

Just curious, for US citizens would burning those bridges mean no more tax return filings?

No... you still have to do the filing. But as a foreign resident you get a shit load off your taxes! That is a good thing! A very good thing!!!

I think you missed the point. He's saying getting in deep sh1t with the IRS is the most effective method to ensure you can't go home.

But I was surprised to learn that 15 years of not having filed was greeted by "mai bpen rai" when I inquired, my income's been under the threshold, apparently won't even have any fines.

Sorry I took the initials IRS to mean the US IRS. There if he has been a foreign resident (a US citizen living overseas) he will have to file a tax return but will be given a tax break based upon your net income. As for the Thai IRS, as a foreign person residing in Thailand (with proper documentation) the same applies. There is a tax break that is given here as well. Though you will have to pay something, unless you fall below the threshold, or so I hear.

[thailiketoo]

Just curious, for US citizens would burning those bridges mean no more tax return filings?

No... you still have to do the filing. But as a foreign resident you get a shit load off your taxes! That is a good thing! A very good thing!!!

I think you missed the point. He's saying getting in deep sh1t with the IRS is the most effective method to ensure you can't go home.

But I was surprised to learn that 15 years of not having filed was greeted by "mai bpen rai" when I inquired, my income's been under the threshold, apparently won't even have any fines.

Sorry I took the initials IRS to mean the US IRS. There if he has been a foreign resident (a US citizen living overseas) he will have to file a tax return but will be given a tax break based upon your net income. As for the Thai IRS, as a foreign person residing in Thailand (with proper documentation) the same applies. There is a tax break that is given here as well. Though you will have to pay something, unless you fall below the threshold, or so I hear.

The U.S. is the ONLY developed country that taxes its citizens living overseas on foreign-earned income.

http://www.aaro.org/taxation