G'day all, i have had a thai girlfriend for roughly 2 years. She used to have a decent room/box last visit. This time not. I am on the end of a months holiday and we took the vip bus last night from Amnat Cheroen to bkk. We flew there.

I hadn't booked any accomodation due to coming to bkk a night early so i slept in her new room on the floor with no a/c. And peter (the coackroaches)

I didn't like it/ how she is now living. She is a hairdresser and has lived in the Sukhumvit area for 20 yrs or so.

Do i help? I have told her that she survived ok before we met you should b ok without me sending you money. I feel a little uncomfortable knowing she lives like this. I don't want to become a sponsor but we got a hotel early this am and i am watching her sleep in a decent bed with a/c and she looks happy.

Thanks for your ideas in advance!

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You are the 10000000000000000000000000000000000th that felt sorry for a bird here..........I did...........

Years on I wish I wasn't such a softy................

"G'day all, i have had a thai girlfriend"

Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to her kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah...

Baby I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor (you know)
I used to live alone before I knew you
And I've seen your flag on the marble arch
and love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah...

Edited to add some lyrics

all the best and good luck ...

I'm with TA on this point, it's easy to feel sorry for people here but the fact is that they live that way and have done so for a long time. Maybe if the relationship develops into something more over time, then you can think about being charitable, for now, I wouldn't even think about it.

i also had a Thai girlfriend. she was a hostess on Air Siam. that was 40 years ago, my weight was 20kg less... my stamina was 1000% of today's... ahhhh nostalgia...

Are you certain that you didn't transpose some numbers there?

OP, you want to know what's worse than living in a dump? It's being offered a few days to live in luxury, and then going back to the dump. You're not doing her any favors. Once you show her the good life, you need to do better than just a few days on your vacation. Unless you're prepared to share her with some other guy who will offer more.

Anything in Bangkok would be better than Amnat Charoern.

Anything in Bangkok would be better than Amnat Charoern.

Be good for a Visa Run though?

... opps, they don't allow that any more ...

My brother met a gal in Thailand. She was from Isaan. Good looking. No Pam Anderson, but that is not the point.

First time I went there, I speculated that I would be shot in the back of the head. A roll of toilet paper was on the "dining room" table. A female roommate was passed out.

Two days later he and her had a verbal argument about where to eat on Suk / Soi 3 @ 3 am.

I went to Hillary Bar.

Whats the point? TIT. No lecture. No point. No sense.

But I will be back. Sooner. Not later. Sooner.

Was that her real room, or her show room to make you feel sorry?

Plenty of girls that have a really nice house, but pretend to live in a toilet so Mr. Right Knight will give them money.

She should send you money because you ride buses.

My brother met a gal in Thailand. She was from Isaan. Good looking. No Pam Anderson, but that is not the point.

First time I went there, I speculated that I would be shot in the back of the head. A roll of toilet paper was on the "dining room" table. A female roommate was passed out.

Two days later he and her had a verbal argument about where to eat on Suk / Soi 3 @ 3 am.

I went to Hillary Bar.

Whats the point? TIT. No lecture. No point. No sense.

But I will be back. Sooner. Not later. Sooner.

I have a toilet roll on the table, think we all do . Not second hand though...............

The problem is when you give a bit they want more. And when you give more they want more than that.

Don't start. It never stops.

She would very rarely sleep in that room. She will probably have many farrang boyfriends who take her to their hotel rooms. When it's your turn, take her to your hotel room. Don't pay for her to stay elsewhere when you go back home.

Hmm, troll city in this thread! Ever think the OP and his G/F might be slightly more normal people than you're used to seeing in Thailand!

Hmm, troll city in this thread! Ever think the OP and his G/F might be slightly more normal people than you're used to seeing in Thailand!

Probably .

However a box room on sukhumvit for 20 years.

Alarm bells are ringing for me.

The OP should spend a bit more time with her here. Not splashing the cash.

Try to meet some of her friends.

Get a better picture.

Years ago I was shagging a Chinese bird living in a room above a take away on Holloway rd.

Her living arrangements were terrible.

Didn't think of sending her any money.

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OP - what soi at Sukhumkvit, upper, lower of mid, a number might help ?

Was that her real room, or her show room to make you feel sorry?

Plenty of girls that have a really nice house, but pretend to live in a toilet so Mr. Right Knight will give them money.

Absolutely......spot on.

Why doesn't the OP arrive unannounced next time and just follow, and see if she really lives there..?

Not saying this is true in your case, but lots of these ladies have decent places with other gals/boyfriends..... and keep an odd room on the side for appearances (of being single/poor).

My ex just passed away, and I found out just now that she had a husband that I was supporting for 8 years. When I did my visits to my kids, they lived in a shoebox apartment with no food on the shelf. This was just a decoy. Their real home (I never knew of) was elsewheres.

Troll or not........sad to see that trying to do good is a weakness. Says it all, as many have experienced.

Not saying this is true in your case, but lots of these ladies have decent places with other gals/boyfriends..... and keep an odd room on the side for appearances (of being single/poor).

My ex just passed away, and I found out just now that she had a husband that I was supporting for 8 years. When I did my visits to my kids, they lived in a shoebox apartment with no food on the shelf. This was just a decoy. Their real home (I never knew of) was elsewheres.

Sorry to read that guy, BUT I do know of others..................

OP, you want to know what's worse than living in a dump? It's being offered a few days to live in luxury, and then going back to the dump. You're not doing her any favors. Once you show her the good life, you need to do better than just a few days on your vacation. Unless you're prepared to share her with some other guy who will offer more.

OMG, Berkshire, I can't believe you said this!! We ALL sometimes live moments of life that are better than our regular life!! I used to work for a privately owned company where the owner had a 30 million dollar private plane. I was lucky enough to enjoy several flights on that, and many of them were vacations, not even work!! Should that guy have bought me my own ...or offered me a lifetime of first class tickets on commercial airlines??

What about nicer than normal dinners, we have all had, at someone else's expense, or even our own. Can't ever eat "regular food" after that? Even at our own expense, we all give ourselves special things from time to time. If we could only upgrade to having those things ALL the time, than nothing would ever seem very special would it??

I gave "myself" a vacation to a small Tahitian island some years ago, and got one of those $1000++++ a day over-water bungalows. It was awesome! I dream about doing it again, and think I will do it again. If I had continued to live there, until now, I would be broke of course, but I am sure, pretty damn bored as well. And something else would seem like a dream, like some snowy mountains in Utah.

I think we should all be grateful for the luxuries we are offered from time to time, no matter where they come from, and it makes life nice to look forward to things, enjoy special moments, etc. These things will not be the same, obviously, for every person.

" feel a little uncomfortable knowing she lives like this. I don't want to become a sponsor "

Well, instead of becoming a sponsor, you could buy her something she could use?

Maybe an AC or a fan?

Maybe a new mattress? Kitchen wares?

New scooter?

I have a girlfriend and she knows I cannot be her sponsor, but I do get her gifts that she can use and live with.

She appreciates that just as much.

My brother met a gal in Thailand. She was from Isaan. Good looking. No Pam Anderson, but that is not the point.

First time I went there, I speculated that I would be shot in the back of the head. A roll of toilet paper was on the "dining room" table. A female roommate was passed out.

Two days later he and her had a verbal argument about where to eat on Suk / Soi 3 @ 3 am.

I went to Hillary Bar.

Whats the point? TIT. No lecture. No point. No sense.

But I will be back. Sooner. Not later. Sooner.

I have a toilet roll on the table, think we all do . Not second hand though...............

When on the table it should be referred to as rotating napkin.

The answer to your question actually has little to do with her, or the posters here. The answer is you! Regardless that this is how she has always lived, or must live; irrespective of the valid points raised here by people with some real wisdom; who do you want to be? Is there a way that you can modestly change something in her world without injuring yourself, her pride, or enticing her to accept handouts? In my estimate, 2 years is a long time. Do you love this girl? Even if you are not in love with her, do you love her enough that should you never see her again, you would still deeply wish her love, peace, and health in her life? If the answers here suggest the man you would be as you grow older, then you should consider making a difference in this woman's life- if you are able.

If, in the end, you get taken for a ride, or made a fool- so what! You don't invest in people because you are sure of a return. You invest in people when/if its the right thing to do, and you do it as much for your own soul as their own life. It makes no difference if a million other Thai women screwed people over. If you care about her, and can change her life, and you wish to see this, than consider doing it!

Not saying this is true in your case, but lots of these ladies have decent places with other gals/boyfriends..... and keep an odd room on the side for appearances (of being single/poor).

My ex just passed away, and I found out just now that she had a husband that I was supporting for 8 years. When I did my visits to my kids, they lived in a shoebox apartment with no food on the shelf. This was just a decoy. Their real home (I never knew of) was elsewheres.

Bad luck there, why didn't the kids tell you?

......you don't know if she owns 3 houses....because of people like you......

" feel a little uncomfortable knowing she lives like this. I don't want to become a sponsor "

Well, instead of becoming a sponsor, you could buy her something she could use?

Maybe an AC or a fan?

Maybe a new mattress? Kitchen wares?

New scooter?

I have a girlfriend and she knows I cannot be her sponsor, but I do get her gifts that she can use and live with.

She appreciates that just as much.

MantisMan actually puts my thoughts into practice with some useful ideas. I have over the years bought 3 motorbikes, put two people in school, one into masters program, and little things here and there. Why? Because I wanted to. Do like MantisMan suggests; perhaps this is your middle way solution.

The answer to your question actually has little to do with her, or the posters here. The answer is you! Regardless that this is how she has always lived, or must live; irrespective of the valid points raised here by people with some real wisdom; who do you want to be? Is there a way that you can modestly change something in her world without injuring yourself, her pride, or enticing her to accept handouts? In my estimate, 2 years is a long time. Do you love this girl? Even if you are not in love with her, do you love her enough that should you never see her again, you would still deeply wish her love, peace, and health in her life? If the answers here suggest the man you would be as you grow older, then you should consider making a difference in this woman's life- if you are able.

If, in the end, you get taken for a ride, or made a fool- so what! You don't invest in people because you are sure of a return. You invest in people when/if its the right thing to do, and you do it as much for your own soul as their own life. It makes no difference if a million other Thai women screwed people over. If you care about her, and can change her life, and you wish to see this, than consider doing it!

There is a bigger picture for those of us who have seen that picture.