wifes family

[German Viking]

Wanna have a good wife with good in-law, stay away from marrying bar girls from Soi Cow Boy, Nana Entertainment, Pat Phong, Pattaya Walking Street. Thier family is waiting to invade you and suck you dry. The truth hurt!!!

nice generalization!

How many successful marriages do you know between falang and a Nana Plaza whore then? I have known about 20 that married one, none still are and one lasted 6 weeks!

6 weeks is pretty long, I remember a case about 15 year ago, Farang married bargirl, bought a big house in here name in Kata and had nothing better to as to tell her in the honeymoon night, about all the assets he still owns, in top a life insurance worth about 500,000 DM.

He did'nt survived his wedding 1 week he was found in the middle of the night on the road beside his motorbike dead, probably hit by a bigger car, no witnesses was very mysterious.

Be careful all Farangs out there, your enemy is sometimes closer as you expect.

[geronimo]

This is not Thai related and should be.moved to the Humanity forum.

[German Viking]

This is not Thai related and should be.moved to the Humanity forum.

But true.

[German Viking]

This is not Thai related and should be.moved to the Humanity forum.

But true.

[jacky54]

I have been mislead now 8 are here, and never bring any booze with them either, like a swarm of locusts, hopefully swarming off tomorrow.

[Matej]

Wanna have a good wife with good in-law, stay away from marrying bar girls from Soi Cow Boy, Nana Entertainment, Pat Phong, Pattaya Walking Street. Thier family is waiting to invade you and suck you dry. The truth hurt!!!

Yes, and parents are enjoying parties and playing cards back home in Isaan.

Welcome in Thailand where family means everything ... Pathetic.

Many times I have been thinking how to help those women, but I'm afraid for 99% of them it's too late, sadly.

Girl leaving from Isaan and the same girl after one year working on Walking street in Pattaya are two different human beings.

... and don't forget that poor men in Thailand want to enjoy too, at least old, fat and disgusting falangs pay.

Behind the scene it's 1000 times worse, women trafficking.

Prayuth, cut off pimps heads and don't forget those sitting in the same building like you.

Edited January 4, 2015 by Matej

[johnnycthedog]

Hi I will not have my thais family come and stay with me it is not on and if I am back home in Australia and some of her family stay at my home I am ok with that but when I am in my home living in thailand they can't stay the first time I come back after I have been away for a long time I put on the food but outside not in my home and then after that I don't see them I mite see her mum and dad walk pass but not come in my home my home is of limits to the Thais family I told her from day one I not like people come to my home and no kids as well last year I had the kids sitting out the front and told her to tell them to go away and the next day no kids it is my home and not the Thais family's home and yes some of you will say you can't own a home in thailand and yes I can't own it but I have a 30 years agreement on the land and I paid to build the home and if she is good to me and she has been good to me in the last 6 years she can have the home but if she plays up and piss me off or go's and has a boyfriend behind my back then the home will come down to earth and I will put it on YouTube but hop it does not come to that I am the boos I pay for everything and she no's that , it has taking me some time to get her to understand who pays and now she understand and I will not give her money when I am in thailand but I do send her money every month when I go home to Australia but and I say this I WILL NOT GIVE MY THAI WIFE MONEY WHEN I AM LIVEING IN THAILAND NEVER AND IF SHE DOSE NOT LIKE IT SHE KNOWS WERE THE DOOR IS .

Wow! You are just bubbling over with kindness and goodwill eh!

And all in one sentence.

[WhamBam]

Wanna have a good wife with good in-law, stay away from marrying bar girls from Soi Cow Boy, Nana Entertainment, Pat Phong, Pattaya Walking Street. Thier family is waiting to invade you and suck you dry. The truth hurt!!!

Many ladies far from that scene suck men dry too.

Far to much of a generalisation.

[glegolo]

I think that the name of the title "Wifes family" in this thread is completely wrong!! It should have read "Stupid falangs unable to adapt" I cant really think it is existing so cold notadaptable childish grown ups.... or is it growns that have posting in the beginning of this thread!!!

No wonder thai believe that foreigners are stupid, slow and rude...... I can only say to you people....get a grip of yourself, you are not more than selfish childish small humans in my eyes..... shame on you,,, big shame....

Glegolo

[crickets]

Adapt........what do u mean?.....put up with it... no way was i going to spend all 5 days there with that going on. No privacy... sitting there every night and looking stupid.. the more time i am with them means the more i have to spend on them. One whole night and day is enough. 15 of them in my 3 bedroom house. Dont mind them staying....just me not being there.

[glegolo]

Adapt........what do u mean?.....put up with it... no way was i going to spend all 5 days there with that going on. No privacy... sitting there every night and looking stupid.. the more time i am with them means the more i have to spend on them. One whole night and day is enough. 15 of them in my 3 bedroom house. Dont mind them staying....just me not being there.

The way you express yourself in this situation,, take control over YOUR house,, are you a whimp or what??? You seems to be very nice towards your wife/girlfriend (irony of course)... Her family shows up, sure thaistile,,, probably not officaly welcomed,,,, but inofficially YES... You roll all over your partner, dont care a shit,,,, and THAT is a behavior that put the BIG shame on you..

Glegolo

[crickets]

She pays half of the home loan. The issue was how much time i need to spend there with them.

[geronimo]

She pays half of the home loan. The issue was how much time i need to spend there with them.

All these guys who tell you to man up are basically idiots. A smart person compromises. You must if you want to achieve an equilibrium. You are compromising, meeting her halfway, nothing bad about that. It's her family and her culture and you are a visitor. You have no right to dictate and I can see that you know that.

[glegolo]

She pays half of the home loan. The issue was how much time i need to spend there with them.

All these guys who tell you to man up are basically idiots. A smart person compromises. You must if you want to achieve an equilibrium. You are compromising, meeting her halfway, nothing bad about that. It's her family and her culture and you are a visitor. You have no right to dictate and I can see that you know that.

Yes maybe in other questions, but not this one! We are saying exactly the very same thing. So what does that makes you than??

Glegolo

[richard_smith237]

My Inlaws live in Bangkok and visit us regularly... I have asked my Wife to ensure that they feel then can come round and visit us at any time they want. They are new grandparents and eager to see their grandson as often as possible. We've taken him away to the UK three times in the First Year, he's also been away on holiday with us a few times.... each and every time we are away this leaves the grandparents hungering for more time with him... They FaceTime each day...

I have only one request of my Inlaws - If they want to visit please let us know, just incase we are about to go out for dinner or have other plans...

This has worked out well... the frequent visits are a lot, but who am I to decide when my Son's grandparents can visit?... the decision should be mutually agreeable and made without prejudice or pressure... More than often than not the Inlaws call up and ask if its ok to pop round and do we need any food picking up etc...

It's a nice informal arrangement and I'm happy with things this way - I would never like to feel as though I'm getting in the way of the Grandparents exposure to my Son, but I also appreciate the respect offered in asking if a visit is convenient for us.

One of the disappointments I have is that both my Wife and I feel as if we are unable to leave our Son with his Thai Grandparents while we go out for an evening. Unfortunately they are 'fun grandparents' only - they don't use seat belts in a car, they drink and drive and have little responsibility... I worry they could accidentally harm our grandchild out of innocent ignorance (having seen some silly things such as trying to feed him bread and handing him a glass of water at 3 months old). My Wife grew up with a nanny who did all the parenting work.

So from my perspective - The Inlaws are there to have fun with my Son, to spoil him and be playful.... I let a lot slide and smile in the enjoyment of both my Son and his grandparents.... I also understand how a few days could be quite overwhelming for some... Perhaps its lucky my Inlaws live in the same city, the visits are a trickle rather than an all or nothing deal.......

For the most part I feel we should be more respectful and welcoming to our Inlaws... After all they are loved dearly and highly respected by someone we love and respect (or should).....

[geronimo]

She pays half of the home loan. The issue was how much time i need to spend there with them.

All these guys who tell you to man up are basically idiots. A smart person compromises. You must if you want to achieve an equilibrium. You are compromising, meeting her halfway, nothing bad about that. It's her family and her culture and you are a visitor. You have no right to dictate and I can see that you know that.

Yes maybe in other questions, but not this one! We are saying exactly the very same thing. So what does that makes you than??

Glegolo

What does that make me? A man that compromises.

[Blackfox]

My Inlaws live in Bangkok and visit us regularly... I have asked my Wife to ensure that they feel then can come round and visit us at any time they want. They are new grandparents and eager to see their grandson as often as possible. We've taken him away to the UK three times in the First Year, he's also been away on holiday with us a few times.... each and every time we are away this leaves the grandparents hungering for more time with him... They FaceTime each day...

I have only one request of my Inlaws - If they want to visit please let us know, just incase we are about to go out for dinner or have other plans...

This has worked out well... the frequent visits are a lot, but who am I to decide when my Son's grandparents can visit?... the decision should be mutually agreeable and made without prejudice or pressure... More than often than not the Inlaws call up and ask if its ok to pop round and do we need any food picking up etc...

It's a nice informal arrangement and I'm happy with things this way - I would never like to feel as though I'm getting in the way of the Grandparents exposure to my Son, but I also appreciate the respect offered in asking if a visit is convenient for us.

One of the disappointments I have is that both my Wife and I feel as if we are unable to leave our Son with his Thai Grandparents while we go out for an evening. Unfortunately they are 'fun grandparents' only - they don't use seat belts in a car, they drink and drive and have little responsibility... I worry they could accidentally harm our grandchild out of innocent ignorance (having seen some silly things such as trying to feed him bread and handing him a glass of water at 3 months old). My Wife grew up with a nanny who did all the parenting work.

So from my perspective - The Inlaws are there to have fun with my Son, to spoil him and be playful.... I let a lot slide and smile in the enjoyment of both my Son and his grandparents.... I also understand how a few days could be quite overwhelming for some... Perhaps its lucky my Inlaws live in the same city, the visits are a trickle rather than an all or nothing deal.......

For the most part I feel we should be more respectful and welcoming to our Inlaws... After all they are loved dearly and highly respected by someone we love and respect (or should).....

A well written post Richard.

I live with my in laws and love it.

[Rhys]

How ever many seconds you can stand, then bolt to an important place...let them know...smile...let them save face...

difficult...

[tommybhill]

I think this all depends on the type of person you are. I think you'll find more often than not westerners are very private, I don't mind my wifes family coming round but I think 13 people in your house for 5 days is taking the p**s a bit. I would definitely try to enjoy yourself with them though. I know when I first met my wifes Dad, wai'd, smiled etc and his spoke to me twice since in 4 years. I'm half his age though which plays a big part.

Some of your posts are quality!

[tommybhill]

I would be gracious and grateful host. Welcome them to the home with open arms.

If you can be magnanimous and sincere and big, even for 15 minutes. You could then politely excuse yourself for less than self-indulgent reasons.

If you're unable to do that, I would get some long term spiritual counseling. Be solitary and look at yourself.

I'm suggesting this to you as a spiritual brother. Love them. They are your wife family and loved ones. ASk God to help.

Auld lang syne

I don't think we have to bring god in to this and get all weird.

Basically you just have to be a good person. I.E your first couple of sentences.

[geronimo]

I would be gracious and grateful host. Welcome them to the home with open arms.

If you can be magnanimous and sincere and big, even for 15 minutes. You could then politely excuse yourself for less than self-indulgent reasons.

If you're unable to do that, I would get some long term spiritual counseling. Be solitary and look at yourself.

I'm suggesting this to you as a spiritual brother. Love them. They are your wife family and loved ones. ASk God to help.

Auld lang syne

I don't think we have to bring god in to this and get all weird.

Basically you just have to be a good person. I.E your first couple of sentences.

God was banned by the mods indefinitelty.

[Matej]

There's are no good falangs and bad Thais, or good Thais and bad falangs. Forget these two sides.

Remember nation is empty word, it has no meaning. It's undefined and unreadable mass of people.

We are not sociologists.

Thai woman who takes her falang(husband, boyfriend, good friend) to her home and expect he will enjoy the same food,

smile at the same jokes and talk about the same things is at least naive.

Falang who expects that everyone will miraculously speak fluent English, there will be western food prepared for him, no big family visiting ... is at least beginner in Thailand.

Love and respect your wife, she will never give up her family.

I used to say people, don't be nice, be kind. But I think in Thailand you have to be nice too.

because you are foreigner it doesn't mean you cannot criticize, but be constructive and realistic.

Good luck.

[benalibina]

There's are no good falangs and bad Thais, or good Thais and bad falangs. Forget these two sides.

Remember nation is empty word, it has no meaning. It's undefined and unreadable mass of people.

We are not sociologists.

Thai woman who takes her falang(husband, boyfriend, good friend) to her home and expect he will enjoy the same food,

smile at the same jokes and talk about the same things is at least naive.

Falang who expects that everyone will miraculously speak fluent English, there will be western food prepared for him, no big family visiting ... is at least beginner in Thailand.

Love and respect your wife, she will never give up her family.

I used to say people, don't be nice, be kind. But I think in Thailand you have to be nice too.

because you are foreigner it doesn't mean you cannot criticize, but be constructive and realistic.

Good luck.

Constructive and realistic.....thats a nice one.....give it time and you will know....

Btw....i just tried....been met with denial....deception, control, threats......but i tried at least.....hopeless.

Edited January 11, 2015 by benalibina

[Matej]

There's are no good falangs and bad Thais, or good Thais and bad falangs. Forget these two sides.

Remember nation is empty word, it has no meaning. It's undefined and unreadable mass of people.

We are not sociologists.

Thai woman who takes her falang(husband, boyfriend, good friend) to her home and expect he will enjoy the same food,

smile at the same jokes and talk about the same things is at least naive.

Falang who expects that everyone will miraculously speak fluent English, there will be western food prepared for him, no big family visiting ... is at least beginner in Thailand.

Love and respect your wife, she will never give up her family.

I used to say people, don't be nice, be kind. But I think in Thailand you have to be nice too.

because you are foreigner it doesn't mean you cannot criticize, but be constructive and realistic.

Good luck.

Constructive and realistic.....thats a nice one.....give it time and you will know....

Btw....i just tried....been met with denial....deception, control, threats......but i tried at least.....hopeless.

Deliver result/change sth. is another story, I agree ... but be blind? Why???

[benalibina]

There's are no good falangs and bad Thais, or good Thais and bad falangs. Forget these two sides.

Remember nation is empty word, it has no meaning. It's undefined and unreadable mass of people.

We are not sociologists.

Thai woman who takes her falang(husband, boyfriend, good friend) to her home and expect he will enjoy the same food,

smile at the same jokes and talk about the same things is at least naive.

Falang who expects that everyone will miraculously speak fluent English, there will be western food prepared for him, no big family visiting ... is at least beginner in Thailand.

Love and respect your wife, she will never give up her family.

I used to say people, don't be nice, be kind. But I think in Thailand you have to be nice too.

because you are foreigner it doesn't mean you cannot criticize, but be constructive and realistic.

Good luck.

Constructive and realistic.....thats a nice one.....give it time and you will know....

Btw....i just tried....been met with denial....deception, control, threats......but i tried at least.....hopeless.

Deliver result/change sth. is another story, I agree ... but be blind? Why???

Blind.....its a mindset....in the situation i deal with....it seems an unbreakable one.....add to that the UNwillingness, education/conditioning??, factor and you have it all.

I once saw on Animal Planet a documentary about a lionness who had puppies. They were killed and eaten by

the father. She (had to ??)had sex again with that same lion.

[Matej]

Pragmatism vs. idealism. Endless war.

Why I shouldn't criticize public transport in Krung Thep, because I'm a foreigner or because it has zero impact? Maybe both,

Or night life in Thailand ... There are many things that I/we will/should always attack at least by words.

Million times I told them, don't tell lies, but they still do ...

I know what you mean, I understand. Don't worry

Edited January 11, 2015 by Matej

[Crazy chef 1]

My hosting skills are non-existent, so the thought of 13 house guests gives me heart palpitations and sweaty palms.

OP: One question. Are all these family members coming to see your wife and you, or are they mainly there because you happen to live in an attractive vacation destination?

I don't think it's a smart move to pull a disappearing act, but in the future I think it would be perfectly understandable if you negotiated with your wife about having some people stay in hotels, eating out in restaurants, planning "out of the house" excursions for them to give you and your wife some "down" time, etc. Maybe your wife could stay with you at your friend's condo a night or two as well.

Good luck.

Gecko my friend...good thoughts...but PLANNING???