How does one handle permanently drunk brothers of GF's?

[rockyysdt]

Thanks B P.

Good advice.

Definitely won't put up with a psycho drunk.

GF also fed up and is considering calling in the Army.

I said she should think before acting as they could end up shooting him.

She thought, "Good, no more problems".

We both agreed if he lived in Bangkok or Pattaya, he'd probably be dead by now due to his offensive behavior.

[fredob43]

Sorry I haven't read all the posts.

But just my 3 pence worth for you and others.

When I first arrived in Thailand some 25+years ago got talking to an old timer who advised me that if I ever decided to settle down with a lady never never never live near her family at least 300km away 500 if they have transport. May I suggest 1,000 if possible.

When I decided to live with my then G/F now wife we did just that, have never had any problems with her mob ever, the odd phone calls on how is she going, but that is it.

Peace and quiet for the last 14 years.

I know it's a bit late in your case but for others that do get involved if you start by doing the above you will find you will have at least a some sort of chance in your life.

Do what Rocky has done and as you see you will be buggered.

Best of luck Rocky unless you and maybe your G/L get away you'll be just that Buggered.

[rockyysdt]

Unfortunately GF is attached to her home, and owns rice fields which have been in the family for generations and now acquired by her.

She is also now the Matriarch. Takes care of her mother and has a young one, abandoned by the mother, to support.

I will admire from afar and visit on occasion.

[fredob43]

Unfortunately GF is attached to her home, and owns rice fields which have been in the family for generations and now acquired by her.

She is also now the Matriarch. Takes care of her mother and has a young one, abandoned by the mother, to support.

I will admire from afar and visit on occasion.

I did like your last sentence view from afar.

Seems like you have got it sorted, she has got commitments looks like forever. You don't.

Shame really but that's the way things go over here family No: 1. Hope she and yourself eventually get things sorted.

Last thing you or her want is to be woken up during the night by a crazy drunkard wanting cash for drink.

You only have to look at the news almost everyday where some idiot does damage to house or persons to know how things can turn out.

I and I'm sure other posters wish you both well with all your endeavours.

[rockyysdt]

GF confronted him when he was sober about his recent conduct.

He had no recollection of his behavior.

[steven100]

temple job for him I'd say ....

[fredob43]

GF confronted him when he was sober about his recent conduct.

He had no recollection of his behavior.

He'll also have no recollection of why he set fire to the house.

Head lines on TV it wont be in any paper as it'll be just another one of the daily statistics here.

Crazed family member runs amuck in Sisters house.

Cant recall what happened anyway it was the Farang boy friends fault.

Outcome he gets fined 50bt and told not to do it again.

[rockyysdt]

He'll also have no recollection of why he set fire to the house.

Head lines on TV it wont be in any paper as it'll be just another one of the daily statistics here.

Crazed family member runs amuck in Sisters house.

Cant recall what happened anyway it was the Farang boy friends fault.

Outcome he gets fined 50bt and told not to do it again.

I understand the Army junta has a crackdown/campaign against alcohol abuse.

A number of new initiatives in the pipeline including drink driving punishment amongst other programs.

[fredob43]

He'll also have no recollection of why he set fire to the house.

Head lines on TV it wont be in any paper as it'll be just another one of the daily statistics here.

Crazed family member runs amuck in Sisters house.

Cant recall what happened anyway it was the Farang boy friends fault.

Outcome he gets fined 50bt and told not to do it again.

I understand the Army junta has a crackdown/campaign against alcohol abuse.

A number of new initiatives in the pipeline including drink driving punishment amongst other programs.

Yes they are taking away licences for a month + an up to 500bt fine.

Great he more than likely doesn't have a licence anyway. Sis will pay the fine.

[rockyysdt]

Also this will only occur if they get past the back pocket bribe.

I was pulled over for speeding once. The cop said pay him now or come back to the station.

The payment ended up being an unrecorded statistic.

[steven100]

Also this will only occur if they get past the back pocket bribe.

I was pulled over for speeding once. The cop said pay him now or come back to the station.

The payment ended up being an unrecorded statistic.

now that's a good example ..... The world including most people and me also from time to time complain about countries or organisations rampant with bribery & corruption such as Africa and Thailand and the Philippines.

So if you get to pay a speeding fine simple and easy ... on the spot .. no paper work , then that's great for you and same with most people, so they cannot voice discontent with that happening or that is simply hypocritical.

But that's what happens ... in the US , Africa and everywhere ... they stand up in parliament or court and say corruption is no good and must be stamped out but yet they continue to practice it all the time.

The world consists of hypercritical cheats ..

anyway .. thats my rant for today.

[rockyysdt]

You are quite correct S.

However here are the options.

Pay on the spot bribe, colluding in corruption. or

Go back to an up country Police Station in the hands and whims of a corrupt officer and be exposed to a hierarchy of institutionalised corrupt individuals, most likely including those in charge.

My choice was clear.

The noble motivation (combat corruption) would have had as much influence as breaking a drought with a drop of water.

If processed legitimately, no problem doing the right thing.

I've had personal experience at the hands of Thai Police, my only transgression being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Very scary I have to tell you.

[swissie]

After 134 posts so far, the final conclusion must be: If one marries, or permanently makes long term living arrangements with a Thai Female, the "Thai-Family" in it's entirety, will be part of any marriage or other longer term "arrangements". The larger the "Family", the higher are the chances, that some "rotten Eggs" within the family will emerge.

In my humble opinion, it it is advisable to live with the :" Family" for a 6 month period. Within this time frame it will flush out the "rotten eggs" .

Depending on the situation, Farang may decide not to start construction of the planned "Mansion" in Nakhon Nowhere, but just say goodby and move on with his live.Good for him, bad for the "Family". So be it.

Cheers.

[rockyysdt]

Depending on the situation, Farang may decide not to start construction of the planned "Mansion" in Nakhon Nowhere, but just say goodby and move on with his live.Good for him, bad for the "Family". So be it.

Cheers.

Given that Nakhon Nowhere is littered with such mansions, the illusion of sexual desire must be an extremely powerful attachment.

The Buddha taught attachment to Greed & Delusion promotes the ego and leads to much suffering (Dukkha).

[fredob43]

Depending on the situation, Farang may decide not to start construction of the planned "Mansion" in Nakhon Nowhere, but just say goodby and move on with his live.Good for him, bad for the "Family". So be it.

Cheers.

Given that Nakhon Nowhere is littered with such mansions, the illusion of sexual desire must be an extremely powerful attachment.

The Buddha taught attachment to Greed & Delusion promotes the ego and leads to much suffering (Dukkha).

Sorry to say that your the one Suffering under some Delusion that you can cure the situation.

He's not going anywhere he's family she will Have to take care it's the Thai way.

Your just the boyfriend a nobody that's only way out is to bugger off.

Stop banging your head against the wall hoping that something will come up it wont.

Pack and get out before you get the blame for things that are beyond your control.

[rockyysdt]

Depending on the situation, Farang may decide not to start construction of the planned "Mansion" in Nakhon Nowhere, but just say goodby and move on with his live.Good for him, bad for the "Family". So be it.

Cheers.

Given that Nakhon Nowhere is littered with such mansions, the illusion of sexual desire must be an extremely powerful attachment.

The Buddha taught attachment to Greed & Delusion promotes the ego and leads to much suffering (Dukkha).

Sorry to say that your the one Suffering under some Delusion that you can cure the situation.

He's not going anywhere he's family she will Have to take care it's the Thai way.

Your just the boyfriend a nobody that's only way out is to bugger off.

Stop banging your head against the wall hoping that something will come up it wont.

Pack and get out before you get the blame for things that are beyond your control.

What makes you come to this conclusion?

I'm not hoping anything comes up.

I also fully understand people don't change.

To begin with I'm not moving in.

I simply observe and will make decisions based on what transpires.

[fredob43]

Depending on the situation, Farang may decide not to start construction of the planned "Mansion" in Nakhon Nowhere, but just say goodby and move on with his live.Good for him, bad for the "Family". So be it.

Cheers.

Given that Nakhon Nowhere is littered with such mansions, the illusion of sexual desire must be an extremely powerful attachment.

The Buddha taught attachment to Greed & Delusion promotes the ego and leads to much suffering (Dukkha).

Sorry to say that your the one Suffering under some Delusion that you can cure the situation.

He's not going anywhere he's family she will Have to take care it's the Thai way.

Your just the boyfriend a nobody that's only way out is to bugger off.

Stop banging your head against the wall hoping that something will come up it wont.

Pack and get out before you get the blame for things that are beyond your control.

What makes you come to this conclusion?

I'm not hoping anything comes up.

I also fully understand people don't change.

To begin with I'm not moving in.

I simply observe and will make decisions based on what transpires.

Simple you asked for help in your OP on how to deal with a drunk.

You must have been hoping that something could be sorted or as I put it comes up.

You now say that you know that Peeps don't change. What are you hoping for as you know full well it isn't going to happen.

In a pervious post you told us that you had had a set to after he cause problems the frog incident, so you must know what will transpire again sometime along the line.

Your not moving in but you must be staying somewhere local.

Thus enabling you to observe and make your decisions.

Well the decision has been made for you he's there till he kills himself either on M/C or through drink.

Like many other suggestions you have received your in a word Buggered. Move on get away, I reiterate stop banging your head against the wall.

Best of luck.

[rockyysdt]

My post is more than seeking a solution.

The Thai Visa community is a great resource and a place where one can share experiences.

Its been an eye opener in terms of what goes on in country Thailand.

Rest assured, I won't be making this guys problem mine.

[manjara]

Handle it as if it was your own brother. If you can't do that then only 2 choices: move far away with your GF, or move far away without your GF!

[Razzler1973]

Is this house of your GFs in the provinces and you and her live elsewhere in Thailand?

Or, do you live in farangland or elsewhere and just visit the GF on an annual basis for an extended period of time?

If it's the latter then I'd have a good look at just how much you like this girl and do you want some kind of future. If no or unsure then there's no benefit to sticking around. The situation will not change and you're the 'visitor' that isn't dealing with this 24/7, 365 days a year

If you're living in country and come up to the provinces then just try to spend reduced time, let your GF know why. Not that it's anyone's fault just you not comfortable

You don't want to change him, can't change him and your GF will do whatever she thinks is best, no matter what you suggest. It's best not to suggest too much, don't be the guy solving all the problems in a situation you come into when it's most likely been happening many years and will continue no matter what you decide to do

GF must arrive at any conclusion herself and be comfortable with it. All YOU can do is avoid the drunk guy as much as possible, stay in room, go out more and longer and don't engage in any kind of extended communication to the point he thinks you're in any way 'friends'