Why are you still in Thailand?

[JLCrab]

Maybe -- but in Thailand, no one has ever asked me: "So, what do you do?"

?? Oink !! ??? They ask me all the time. LOL. As well as how much I pay for my house (rent) which will always result in the obligatory Pèèèèèng (I pay 5000/month, mind you, but because they don't know/understand that i can't buy here they think it's expensive to pay such a fortune on rent instead of mortgage. i gave up explaining in the name of Thainess.) and why I don't have Thai wife/gf (a question I actually love so I can answer with my straightest, angel-like face "I don't like Thai women, they talk too much and know so little") and how much the plane costs (Pèèèèèng too of course but that's because it's the equivalent of what they spend on LEO in 3 months, imagine what that means to a thai)... But... at "home" people ask me the same idiotic questions (what i do, if it's true that all thai women are whores, etc). It's sooooooo hard to find intelligent, mindfull people anywhere in the world... who mind their own business.

I rarely these days deal with the 'How much you pay? questions but sometimes I just answer 'Too Much' and it short-circuits the conversation. One time way back a Brit asked me how much I paid for a RT ticket to USA and then he answered 'That's too much!' and I said: "Well the next one is free -- is THAT too much?"

[Fairynuff]

What is the point of this thread? A bit of self-congratulations?

Surely there is a better American equivalent to Thai Visa?

This is a forum....a forum is for debate and discussion. So why are you asking what's the point? What's YOUR point?

[Fairynuff]

The OP has the right to raise a topic for discussion as he sees fit. We have the right to agree or disagree with his points. I don't agree with much of what he says, the thought of living in Florida could destroy my will to live. But why jump on him and insult his every word? Let him have his say, agree or disagree but rip him to shreds and you make yourself look bitter, actually it seems many in here are.

[aronp1]

I agree about the minimum pay for a university grad with a 4yr degree. It should be 30 to 40,000, but that is what they will make within 3-4yrs after working for the same company. In the US most likely some who graduates college won't even get a job in their field of study or even a job at all. Try opening a small business in the US without paying sometype of government fee getting a license, dealing with red tape.) When someone asks me where I'm from, I am so embarrassed to say America. There is nothing to be proud of in saying you come from the US. People who never lives in America or people who are just plain blind and stupid, see America as such a great place, when in fact it's one of the worst on the planet. From the outside it may look like the land of golden opportunity (I don't know how it ever got that catch phrase) but when you get there you see it's just a big rubbish dump.

[MaeJoMTB]

For me, I got "stuck" here in Thailand...I had a very good job in the USA, secure with a stable, but not huge income...I met a Thai girl and brought her to the USA...married in Thailand, but not the USA...after she could not adjust to the USA, we moved to Thailand, where I knew I could continue the same work, albeit at a much lower salary...quite literally 3 days upon my arrival here, it came to light that she had a couple of other fellows that she was stringing along the same as me...keep in mind that I thought that we were exclusive to each other for almost 5 years...she had a fellow from the UK and one from Norway, in addition to me...apparently, my settling in Thailand made her deceptions come unraveled...I never thought a "good" girl (government worker) could even consider such a lie that destroyed 4 people's lives...but of course this is Thailand...and I now know firsthand that there is no code of behavior...and no one thinks about their future happiness...today is what matters most, even if it is at the expense of others.

so I am stuck...i brought my assets here...I am too old to return to the USA and hope to find meaningful work, even though I was top in my field, it would mean starting over...I've decided to take my savings and squander them here...I have enough money saved to drink until I am drunk every day...I have enough to rent a decent place...and enough to have a woman anytime I feel the urge...and the women here are usually prettier than the drug addled whores available in the USA...On the upside, I take care of dogs in the area, I garden, I read and study...but I do not even consider to help Thai people...I figure the additional cost I pay for taxis, food, rent, clothes, and even electricity (yes, the pricing structure for utilities is set up to force farangs to pay more) is charity enough...I will never help a Thai, because they will never help themselves.

Before you berate me for being so cynical...I dare say that my story is far more common than the one where a farang meets a Thai and they live happily ever after, sharing life and planning a future together...

Thailand is filled with whores, cowards, liars, and thieves...and some of us try to make the best of it...for many farang this is heaven, because these are the people that attracted us...for more of us, it is just the best alternative...

Bummer!

But no reason to blame a whole nation for your gullibility.

Bringing everything over before you've lived with her a while ....... silly.

I did a similar thing, came here for a girl with more than one on the go, but kept my money back in the UK.

The third one has worked out far better than expected. Married 6 years, nice kids.

And if she fools around, smart enough not to do it in front of me.

[Gary A]

The only thing I'm ashamed of about the USA is the president. As far as wages here, my wife was paying workers 300 baht a day working in her rice paddies. While I was watching them they teased me about helping. I hollered at my wife and asked how much she would pay me. She yelled back that I was NOT worth 300 baht per day. Maybe that's the problem with the educated people who are looking for jobs. They simply are not worth the premium wage they expect.

As far as moving back to the US, I wouldn't ever ask my wife to go because I know she would be miserable there. I am content here and wouldn't wish to return to what has become a nanny country. Perhaps our next president will eliminate the PC crap and restore our rights.

[stickylies]

Maybe -- but in Thailand, no one has ever asked me: "So, what do you do?"

?? Oink !! ??? They ask me all the time. LOL. As well as how much I pay for my house (rent) which will always result in the obligatory Pèèèèèng (I pay 5000/month, mind you, but because they don't know/understand that i can't buy here they think it's expensive to pay such a fortune on rent instead of mortgage. i gave up explaining in the name of Thainess.) and why I don't have Thai wife/gf (a question I actually love so I can answer with my straightest, angel-like face "I don't like Thai women, they talk too much and know so little") and how much the plane costs (Pèèèèèng too of course but that's because it's the equivalent of what they spend on LEO in 3 months, imagine what that means to a thai)... But... at "home" people ask me the same idiotic questions (what i do, if it's true that all thai women are whores, etc). It's sooooooo hard to find intelligent, mindfull people anywhere in the world... who mind their own business.

I rarely these days deal with the 'How much you pay? questions but sometimes I just answer 'Too Much' and it short-circuits the conversation. One time way back a Brit asked me how much I paid for a RT ticket to USA and then he answered 'That's too much!' and I said: "Well the next one is free -- is THAT too much?"

95% of the conversations I used to have with Thai were about money probably because discussing food (that other priority in life) with me is too complicated. After a couple of years I got fed and gave them the MAI ROO or LOEM answer. And if they ask me if something (at home) is expensive I confuse them by telling it's NOT...which it ain't as most of the stuff they ask me about (phones, food, etc) is actually more expensive here. Big discounters in the West sell similar crap as Lotus and 7/11 but much cheaper. Massage, hairdresser, restaurants, rent etc.are cheap here though.

[JLCrab]

Maybe -- but in Thailand, no one has ever asked me: "So, what do you do?"

?? Oink !! ??? They ask me all the time. LOL. As well as how much I pay for my house (rent) which will always result in the obligatory Pèèèèèng (I pay 5000/month, mind you, but because they don't know/understand that i can't buy here they think it's expensive to pay such a fortune on rent instead of mortgage. i gave up explaining in the name of Thainess.) and why I don't have Thai wife/gf (a question I actually love so I can answer with my straightest, angel-like face "I don't like Thai women, they talk too much and know so little") and how much the plane costs (Pèèèèèng too of course but that's because it's the equivalent of what they spend on LEO in 3 months, imagine what that means to a thai)... But... at "home" people ask me the same idiotic questions (what i do, if it's true that all thai women are whores, etc). It's sooooooo hard to find intelligent, mindfull people anywhere in the world... who mind their own business.

I rarely these days deal with the 'How much you pay? questions but sometimes I just answer 'Too Much' and it short-circuits the conversation. One time way back a Brit asked me how much I paid for a RT ticket to USA and then he answered 'That's too much!' and I said: "Well the next one is free -- is THAT too much?"

95% of the conversations I used to have with Thai were about money probably because discussing food (that other priority in life) with me is too complicated. After a couple of years I got fed and gave them the MAI ROO or LOEM answer. And if they ask me if something (at home) is expensive I confuse them by telling it's NOT...which it ain't as most of the stuff they ask me about (phones, food, etc) is actually more expensive here. Big discounters in the West sell similar crap as Lotus and 7/11 but much cheaper. Massage, hairdresser, restaurants, rent etc.are cheap here though.

Sounds like you've found yourself a swell bunch of companions.

[bwpage3]

Bringing a Thai women to the USA is like raising a child.

If you like that good for you.

You have to teach them many things.

You also have to show them how to drive (if you dare), get them insurance and medical, the language, teach them a completely different culture.

The job part is huge as I agree it is not easy for them to find one, especially a decent job.

So eventually boredom will settle in.

I think it is easier for a guy from the USA to move to Thailand, then for them to come here.

I think some guys become so convinced that life in the West is so infinitely better that they scarcely give a moment's thought to how well their Thai wife will adjust to a new life in the West, and what effort will be needed to make the adjustment a smooth one.

I genuinely worry that some guys not only fail to fully consider, but may even deliberately neglect, their wife's adjustment needs. Secretly threatened by the prospect that the wife might become too socially or financially independent, they neglect these needs in the hope that their wife's primary focus will remain caring for their spouse. If no planning or effort is made to facilitate cultural assimilation, social extension, language skill, educational and occupational development, social isolation and boredom will almost inevitably set in. OP, what if your wife wants to work, but the best job she can find is as a housekeeper at the local Motel 6, or working the drive thru window at the Jack-in-the-Box restaurant? Will you find this so socially embarrassing that you will refuse to let her work away from home?

I also think that some guys fail to consider how well a wife from Southeast Asia, (especially if they have limited formal education, poor English skills, or there is a big age gap between the husband and the wife) will be socially received in the West. Be it casual socializing amongst family, friends or coworkers, at the local country or golf club, at the company Christmas party or Fourth of July picnic, at school events, or at dinner and cocktail parties, etc., subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) judgmental attitudes and prejudices can bubble to the surface, and a foreign born spouse can be made to feel like they don't fit in, and aren't fully accepted or well-respected. Just as an example, on the TV program '90 Days To Wed' (which profiles couples where one spouse is in the US on a fiancee visa), the foreign-born spouses often encounter suspicion and skepticism from family and friends about their motives for marrying.

Also, even if a woman is relatively well-educated, has marketable job skills, and good language skills, not everyone has the temperament or inclination to uproot and move away from their family and friends to an unfamiliar country, no matter how much promise it might hold. Care for aging parents, relationships with already emancipated children, sibblings, friends, already established careers and businesses, and - believe it or not - genuine enjoyment of living in Thailand, may make people reluctant to uproot.

Any sensible person who truly puts the welfare of his family first should at least consider these factors before deciding to relocate. There's no 'one size fits all' answer to where best to live, and I'm genuinely surprised that the OP seems to so woefully under appreciate this.

Just as farang's have to adjust to moving to Thailand, Thai wives are not the first ones to expatriate to other countries. Many thousand's of Thai wives have done so successfully before. You might be surprised how many Thai wives moved outside of Thailand. One other thing to consider is even inside of Thailand, the divorce rate of farang's/Thai's is quite high. If it is going to happen it will happen regardless of the location.

There are Thai's here in Florida that have never been married to a farang and much, much more successful than you or I will ever be.

You cannot "what if" anything from the worst point of you unless you have no confidence in your Thai wife. There are Thai doctors, lawyers, realtors, you name it here in Thailand.

Being insecure about your wife fitting in or getting ahead? All you have to do is look around. Many Thai's have made it own their own in my country better than you or I.

I think your resentment comes from the fact that low educated farangs that marries Thai girls feel like the wives would never amount to anything in a foreign country, make out earn the husband and the fear that the marriage would not be that strong once the wive learned she could stand on her own.

In case you haven't been to the USA lately, Caucasians are not the majority race anymore.

So your claims of not fitting in etc. really are baseless.

Education wise, if you have kids in Thailand that graduate uni with a salary of 15,000 thb per month, you have pretty much sentenced them to having nothing their entire lives.

There is a Thai restaurant here in Florida right down the beach from my house. Single Thai lady that has never been married owns that one and another on the mainland. The property alone is worth at least US $1,000,000 being on the beach and all.

So don't worry so much about Thai's relocating, the same as you found your way in Thailand, they have an easier way to find their way in the USA

[bwpage3]

My Situation:

Lived in Thailand for over 10 straight years

Found the Thai wife, have a kid

Moved back to Florida USA - Back to Corporate America, near the beach, climate same although cooler than Thailand, lots of Thai people, numerous Thai restaurants, Thai grocery stores to buy anything Thai and cook your own.

So basically everything is the same as in Thailand except it is much safer and cleaner where I live.

What is not the same:

Have huge income

Nicer house and vehicles

Nicer places to visit on weekends, holidays, cruises, etc. It's Florida!

Kid is in an excellent school, will be able to go on to Uni and actually have a future when he graduates

We even have a Thai temple

As is in Thailand, we have Thai's here working at Walmart just getting by but most appear to prefer it to Thailand

»So what is keeping you in Thailand?«

For me, it’s because I have a much better life here, than at “home” – not because I had a bad life there, it’s just better here; and so is the weather.

But we are all individuals and have different backgrounds – and age – so what may be a success for some, may not work that well for others; and like OP says, most of us know sad stories about folks who need to return to nothing...

But just to compare with OP, my “not the same” situation seem almost opposite:

My Situation:

–Lived in Thailand for more than 10 straight years

–Found a lovely Thai girlfriend and we have a kid

–Found an outstanding spot by the beach to build a house, pretty close to what I could only dream about; climate warmer than Denmark and about same all year round, 28-34 centigrade, and only about two month rain-season; some Scandinavians and other foreigners living here (but I hardly mingle); numerous of farang restaurants, grocery stores stock almost all kind of farang stuff (including my homeland butter and cheese etc.) I can buy and cook myself.

So basically everything is the same as in Denmark, except the weather is much better, I feel more save than Copenhagen and suburbs, and the neighborhood I live in is nice and clean.

What is not the same:

–Have higher income due to legally be freed from some of the Danish “you name-it, we tax-it” rules; furthermore I can buy little more for my money

–Nicer house, and I even for years had a vehicle (American) I could only dream about at “home”, now I drive a similar nice car as I had at home, but it was cheaper here

–Nicer places to visit on weekends, holidays, cruises, etc. it's Samui and her sisters, and only 50 minutes flight from Bangkok or 1½ hour from Hong Kong and Singapore!

–My daughter is in an excellent EP-school – better than public schools at “home”, when I compare and ask friends – she will be able to attend University just 10 kilometers from where we live, and actually have a future when she graduates (in Denmark she may just be unemployed).

We even have a Christian church (or two); however I’m not religious and we visit the temples instead...

We have Tesco with Thai workers instead of Walmart – same, same, but different – but we don’t have snow and White Christmas, unless we take a trip to Bangkok’s “Snow Town” (artificial); however snow is also rare in Denmark and there are no mountains, so if you wish to ski, you’ll have to travel to Norway or the Alps, same here, I’ve heard there should be excellent ski-sport in Korea, maybe try that one winter.

What kind of future do you see your daughter having graduating from a Thai Uni, which is a worthless piece of paper outside of Thailand and graduate salaries are 15,000 thb per month?

[bwpage3]

For me, I got "stuck" here in Thailand...I had a very good job in the USA, secure with a stable, but not huge income...I met a Thai girl and brought her to the USA...married in Thailand, but not the USA...after she could not adjust to the USA, we moved to Thailand, where I knew I could continue the same work, albeit at a much lower salary...quite literally 3 days upon my arrival here, it came to light that she had a couple of other fellows that she was stringing along the same as me...keep in mind that I thought that we were exclusive to each other for almost 5 years...she had a fellow from the UK and one from Norway, in addition to me...apparently, my settling in Thailand made her deceptions come unraveled...I never thought a "good" girl (government worker) could even consider such a lie that destroyed 4 people's lives...but of course this is Thailand...and I now know firsthand that there is no code of behavior...and no one thinks about their future happiness...today is what matters most, even if it is at the expense of others.

so I am stuck...i brought my assets here...I am too old to return to the USA and hope to find meaningful work, even though I was top in my field, it would mean starting over...I've decided to take my savings and squander them here...I have enough money saved to drink until I am drunk every day...I have enough to rent a decent place...and enough to have a woman anytime I feel the urge...and the women here are usually prettier than the drug addled whores available in the USA...On the upside, I take care of dogs in the area, I garden, I read and study...but I do not even consider to help Thai people...I figure the additional cost I pay for taxis, food, rent, clothes, and even electricity (yes, the pricing structure for utilities is set up to force farangs to pay more) is charity enough...I will never help a Thai, because they will never help themselves.

Before you berate me for being so cynical...I dare say that my story is far more common than the one where a farang meets a Thai and they live happily ever after, sharing life and planning a future together...

Thailand is filled with whores, cowards, liars, and thieves...and some of us try to make the best of it...for many farang this is heaven, because these are the people that attracted us...for more of us, it is just the best alternative...

Thank you for sharing your honest story.

[n210mp]

Every day there is another American whining how life in USA is terrible, how people are unfriendly and how crime is out of control.

These are not stupid people either.

Loneliness is a big problem, many people have never learned to socialize properly.

(Even though they are desperate for company)

Doesn't matter where they live, they will always be unhappy.

What you say is very true, the number of Farang cyclist that are socially dysfunctional amazes me daily, the Thai cyclists on the other hand are always friendly and say hello when they are passing me on their road bike or MTBs (I do occasionally pass a Thai cyclist lottery seller though)

You are not one of these farang cyclist who are distinctly unfriendly are you MaeJoMTB?

[bwpage3]

I agree about the minimum pay for a university grad with a 4yr degree. It should be 30 to 40,000, but that is what they will make within 3-4yrs after working for the same company. In the US most likely some who graduates college won't even get a job in their field of study or even a job at all. Try opening a small business in the US without paying sometype of government fee getting a license, dealing with red tape.) When someone asks me where I'm from, I am so embarrassed to say America. There is nothing to be proud of in saying you come from the US. People who never lives in America or people who are just plain blind and stupid, see America as such a great place, when in fact it's one of the worst on the planet. From the outside it may look like the land of golden opportunity (I don't know how it ever got that catch phrase) but when you get there you see it's just a big rubbish dump.

You can get a small business license in the US for $30 in no time. There is zero red tape. Thais will never get an increase in salary from 15,000 to 40,000. The government took 30 years to get them to 15,000. Facts are facts. What exactly do you own yourself in Thailand? Exactly! You probably have a good reason why the USA is a first world country and Thailand a third world?

[MaeJoMTB]

You are not one of these farang cyclist who are distinctly unfriendly are you MaeJoMTB?

The Thais wave at me, and I wave back.

I even speak to random foreigners at the top.

Cycling is a community thing.

Had a puncture on the way down the other day, 4 Thais on the way up insisted on fixing it for me.

Then another passed by and pumped it up with his new CO2 pump. Everything covered in ice.

I was totally prepared to walk down.

[thaiduncankk]

We've been here for 19+ years to include numerous long trips back to the US. Every time we go back to the US, we think to ourselves, "isn't this better than what we have in Thailand?," to the point that we've considered moving back many times. But when we return to our small home in the jungle, it takes all of a week or two to remind ourselves that what we have here is not attainable in the US, no matter how much money we have. And so we remain.

Different strokes for different folks..........if you're happy in the US, then be happy. But don't deride others who choose to live here....especially when you failed at trying to do so.

And for what it's worth.....I can count the number of Thai/American marriages that are over the 25 year mark on many many more hands than those that have failed. Several nearing the 50 year mark.

Does that count the 700 farangs that got divorced in Khon Kaen in one month?

I have lived in Khon Kaen for over 10 years, and to be honest, your quotation of 700 farangs it the biggest BS I have ever read, or even, the most likely I will ever read on Thai Visa.

Never got a response from OP.

[bazza40]

Why am I still here? Because I live as a rich man, compared to a life in Australia watching every cent.

Every day is an adventure for me.

Incidentally, OP, I loved the bit about a cleaner and safer place to live. Louisiana is a cesspool of chemical dumps. Presumably you live in a gated community. Trump is standing for President, and the NRA's solution to the mass shootings ( which are America's specialty ) is more guns.

Don't even get me started on your medical system, if you can call it that. The name Martin Shkreli ring any bells? Perhaps with your huge earnings, he's your business model.

[MaeJoMTB]

What kind of future do you see your daughter having graduating from a Thai Uni, which is a worthless piece of paper outside of Thailand and graduate salaries are 15,000 thb per month?

I have one, so I'll answer,

I'm hoping she'll marry some old western white guy who will buy her land and a house, and buy me a new pickup.

Hopefully she'll be smart enough to do that 2 or 3 times (through either divorce or death).

While the old guys will be able to boast their young Thai wife speaks perfect English and has a university degree.

[gemguy]

That is in your opinion while no one is envious of what you have or have achieved in the USA rather they just prefer to stay here and continue living in Thailand where one could say there is: More Adventure?...Living on the edge?.....Erotic, Exotic, Tropical Nights in the Mysterious Far East and loads of great experiences...just to name a few of the many reason people come here and stay...regardless of how much they bitch and complain.

Many come here and realize that Thailand is just another place they could live and be content enough or certainly no worse off then where they came from.

Those that really do not like it or can not tolerate it will leave while some will stay on for a number of reason while the ones that leave are soon replaced by others with a sense of adventure in their blood and wanderlust in their soul.

Most come and leave as they please while some can claim they were amongst the small percent that stayed and made Thailand their home.

Cheers

[huawei]

^^^ "sense of adventure in their blood and wanderlust in their soul".

Most are retired , lonely and looking for a wife.

That may have been the case 25 years ago.

[chumpy]

You could spend your whole life working for plan B. Plan B always involves money

my 2 Satang smartàrse comments

-there's no need for a Plan B if you have money,

-that also applies to those who have burned all those proverbial bridges,

-because with money it's rather easy to build new bridges.

Like the cliché says :life is what you make it,it's possible to make a very nice life for yourself in Thailand but it can also turn bad very quickly if you are not careful.The law here does not protect you very much(understatement).I do not recommend coming out here with the aim of doing business in order to stay afloat,for retirement fine but not for business,there are too many things that can go wrong.

[bkk6060]

Something else I do not understand.

I see a lot of of Falang in their 50's with their families one or two kids. Especially in the north. But in Pattaya also.

They look like decent guys.

Clean, well kept, clean clothes, maybe a little belly but groomed.

They are with wives who look terrible. Maybe around age 40, messy hair, fat, t-shirt, dolphin shorts and flip flops.

Plus, absolutely no makeup! In fact, I have not seen many Thai women over 40 who wear makeup.

What is the attraction? You can come to the USA and meet a pig who actually speaks English and maybe even has a job at WalMart, if that is what you are looking for.

Just to add, I rarely see a smile from any of them.

[SoiBiker]

Something else I do not understand.

I see a lot of of Falang in their 50's with their families one or two kids. Especially in the north. But in Pattaya also.

They look like decent guys.

Clean, well kept, clean clothes, maybe a little belly but groomed.

They are with wives who look terrible. Maybe around age 40, messy hair, fat, t-shirt, dolphin shorts and flip flops.

Plus, absolutely no makeup! In fact, I have not seen many Thai women over 40 who wear makeup.

What is the attraction? You can come to the USA and meet a pig who actually speaks English and maybe even has a job at WalMart, if that is what you are looking for.

Just to add, I rarely see a smile from any of them.

But apparently Thai women are all beautiful and age well!

[ggt]

This is not a post...it is a rant demonetizing anyone who vents here on TVF about their expectations being unmet while living in Thailand...

I just love posters who set the tone of the posting by castigating those who may not agree with them...

You should be so proud...

[bazza40]

If I had been 60, wealthy and without ambition, I can see how things might have been different than being young and poor.

At 60 most of your ambition is to live another year.

If you haven't done everything else by then, you're a loser.

Let me suggest you should adjust your thinking - 60 seems to be a mental hurdle for you.

I'm 72, and still have a lot of places to go and things to do.

I certainly don't count myself as a loser - check with Gymkhana who won the Boxing Day golf.

Happy biking. Not for me, but each to his own.

Edited January 5, 2016 by bazza40

[kev78]

Also he has the choice of moving to florida. Many of the members are from the UK which is an expensive, wet, cold, boring country full of ugly fat women (I'm from the UK) It's not quite the same.....

[aronp1]

OP:

Perhaps you should take advantage of America's superior health care and consult with a mental health professional to try and identify what deep insecurities compel you to belittle and disparage others in order to feel better about yourself.

Lots of luck in your search for answers!

And yes... we still remember your Decisions made for returning to the USA thread.

Speaking about healthcare, how's that mandatory health insurance working for you? What is it costing you? $3,000 or $5,000 a month?

[puukao]

the best is telling someone about a farang in Thailand...

"met a bloke in the bar. his girlfriend worked there. he bought her a house. she has 3 kids. she divorced him. he lost it all."

then we both laugh......this is not like a divorce in some western country.

and the other person says, "how can he be so dumb?"

the laws, desperate farangs, makes for bitterness....

[off road pat]

The OP is obviously happy with the choice he has made and it seems to be working out very well for him and his family.

But we don't all want the same thing, so a little more understanding of others and a little less hubris might give space for the choices and opinions of others to be accepted.

My personal view is I have always had a fabulous life in Thailand, but I also have and I am currently enjoying a fabulous life elsewhere.

I've spent the week since Christmas studying in the library and laboratory of one of Europe's finest universities, long days from early morning to late in the evening - for me, a real privilege, absolute bliss.

For the next man, the same might be a living hell, a torture he could not endure.

Make the choices that make you happy and provide for those for whom you have a responsibility - be happy in that and don't fret over the next guy's choices.

He might just as happy, in which case who are you to deny him that, or he might be trapped with no choices available, in which case where is your humanity? If you are not going to help him, leave the man alone.

Most interesting answer so far.....!!! Respect !!!

[bazza40]

Something else I do not understand.

I see a lot of of Falang in their 50's with their families one or two kids. Especially in the north. But in Pattaya also.

They look like decent guys.

Clean, well kept, clean clothes, maybe a little belly but groomed.

They are with wives who look terrible. Maybe around age 40, messy hair, fat, t-shirt, dolphin shorts and flip flops.

Plus, absolutely no makeup! In fact, I have not seen many Thai women over 40 who wear makeup.

What is the attraction? You can come to the USA and meet a pig who actually speaks English and maybe even has a job at WalMart, if that is what you are looking for.

Just to add, I rarely see a smile from any of them.

My Thai GF is 50, looks about 30. Weighs 41 kg, gets quite distressed when the scales say 43 kg, too fat.

She doesn't use makeup except for lipstick occasionally. IMHO she doesn't need it. She smiles a lot. Location Chiang Rai, yes north.

Never going to win Miss Thailand; however, for cute she's 11 out of 10. And she can cook.

I find it quite easy to understand the difference between her and some Western women of the same age.

[SoiBiker]

It's sweet that you think that, but nobody 50 looks 30.