More money

[Bangkok expat]

I am living with my GF 5 years with some problems more or less.

Last year she broke my heart in a bad way but still my love for her was bigger as my ego.

After this i thought all went for the better even when i always thought what is comming next,

Well the next has come up because she complain more and more i no have money and i give

her small money more now and then.

now i know she had money and just asking to squeeze me out i quess

 

Now she asked me if she can get my house (7-8 m) when i die.

I was speachless and thought how you can ask this, i take care you more than good.

Now I wonder she is with me for me or is she with me because of my house?

I never will know the answer as long i am with her as it is an vicious circle.

now i feel bad and unhappy about this but she claimes it is normal to ask for a thai lady.

Edited February 14, 2018 by Bangkok expat

[tgeezer]

  It is normal for a partner to expect to keep what they have in spite of losing their partner.  Many people get married for security,  by caring for your partner well, you are fulfilling that requirment while you live and by leaving her the house you are doing it after you die. 

Edited February 14, 2018 by tgeezer

[transam]

"You" own a house..Are you Thai...?

[colinneil]

Bangkok expat, get out now, stay out a relationship like yours is doomed.

One day you might even wake up dead.

[Justfine]

You're old

She's younger

 

Of course she's in it for the house

 

[Justfine]

3 hours ago, transam said:

"You" own a house..Are you Thai...?

Guess an apartment/townhouse type thing. House sometimes used as a generic term.

[transam]

1 minute ago, Justfine said:

Guess an apartment/townhouse type thing. House sometimes used as a generic term.

I will wait for the OP's reply....

[dotpoom]

4 hours ago, tgeezer said:

  It is normal for a partner to expect to keep what they have in spite of losing their partner.  Many people get married for security,  by caring for your partner well, you are fulfilling that requirment while you live and by leaving her the house you are doing it after you die. 

That'a about tbe size of it!

[scubascuba3]

This is so daft it must be a fake story especially as its his first post. Of course she is with you for your money, its certainly not your bald patch. But don't be hard on yourself its the same for most men here

[scorecard]

4 hours ago, colinneil said:

Bangkok expat, get out now, stay out a relationship like yours is doomed.

One day you might even wake up dead.

 

For the OP, here's an obvious and simple question:

 

- 'Will she ever change, will her attitudes and demands every change, will it suddenly become a good scenario and stay that way forever, will she suddenly make a major change in her behaviors?'.

 

Be honest with yourself; the answer is no, no and no.

 

Make a step by step plan, goals, objectives to get her out of your life, expect some bumps, expect some tears and pleas, make a date that you expect to get it all finished, say within 45 days and move step by step. The major objective should be to be totally free of this situation.

 

Don't procrastinate, go though the bumps, get into a new picture without her.

 

Good luck!

 

 

 

 

Edited February 14, 2018 by scorecard

[wwest5829]

In these area/country, without going into the culture, Security for females is important and needed. That said, you have the financial resources so it is up to you to set the conditions under which you will care for your Thai girl. If she is not happy with those conditions, she should look elsewhere. Yes, concern for her, a real need to support her...but always within what you can sustain, otherwise you are setting up for a failure over time. After 5 years, you should have enough sense of the culture and both th3 good and the bad possibilities.

[Justfine]

1 minute ago, wwest5829 said:

In these area/country, without going into the culture, Security for females is important and needed. That said, you have the financial resources so it is up to you to set the conditions under which you will care for your Thai girl. If she is not happy with those conditions, she should look elsewhere. Yes, concern for her, a real need to support her...but always within what you can sustain, otherwise you are setting up for a failure over time. After 5 years, you should have enough sense of the culture and both th3 good and the bad possibilities.

In which country do females not like free houses?

 

(or males for that matter)

 

 

Edited February 14, 2018 by Justfine

[wwest5829]

1 minute ago, Justfine said:

In which country do females not like free houses?

 

2 minutes ago, Justfine said:

In which country do females not like free houses?

Financial security in countries without old age social security increases the need....but then, you would already know this.

[Justfine]

Just now, wwest5829 said:

 

Financial security in countries without old age social security increases the need....but then, you would already know this.

A free house is a free house. People fight over wills across the western world.

[kingstonkid]

OP

 

The question is more does she make you happy?  The fact that she is looking for security does not surprise me.  Most women in any culture are looking for the same.  She is more looking at the fact that eventually, you may leave for that nicer place before she does and what will happen to her.

 

I would just roll with it.  Do you have a will.  If so show here what she can expect to get when you pass on so that she knows.  remember she is a GF and not covered under marital laws.

[alex8912]

This is wind up day don't you all get it???!!!

[Justfine]

1 minute ago, alex8912 said:

This is wind up day don't you all get it???!!!

Unlike the other 364 days?

 

 

[Emster23]

" Now she asked me if she can get my house (7-8 m) when i die."

Repeat after me: "Never make yourself worth more dead than alive".

Life (and death) are cheap here. She broke your heart big time. Get out while you can. She is playing you, and you are going along with it. It is not going to get any better. The time is now.

[Timebandit]

Once had an older man neighbour with younger Thai in a nice 4 story town home. They argued a lot. He "somehow" went down some very steep stairs backwards and went into a coma. NEXT DAY she pulled the plug. In less than a week she had a big party for all her relatives to show them her new home, car and motorcycle paid for. Much merriment and joy at the party.

Edited February 14, 2018 by Timebandit

[sammieuk1]

Being skint and renting throws up many challenges but not as big as yours no question of money love for me to worry about 

[tonray]

52 minutes ago, wwest5829 said:

In these area/country, without going into the culture, Security for females is important and needed. That said, you have the financial resources so it is up to you to set the conditions under which you will care for your Thai girl. If she is not happy with those conditions, she should look elsewhere. Yes, concern for her, a real need to support her...but always within what you can sustain, otherwise you are setting up for a failure over time. After 5 years, you should have enough sense of the culture and both th3 good and the bad possibilities.

good post.  for a Thai woman the important things are security and appearances.  Security means Gold and Property,  and appearances is the willingness of her partner to provide her with the things she knows cannot be taken from her in any event.  Most would not even be impressed by being beneficiary on life policy or pension... these are concepts foreign to most Thais. It's just part of integration with their culture,  if you try to circumvent it it usually doesn't go well. 

[seancbk]

2 hours ago, Justfine said:

You're old

She's younger

 

Of course she's in it for the house

 

 

Whilst this is possibly true, how do you know?

He may be a young guy and she may only be a year or two younger.  

You don't know that he's old and she is much younger.

 

[Justfine]

5 minutes ago, seancbk said:

 

Whilst this is possibly true, how do you know?

He may be a young guy and she may only be a year or two younger.  

You don't know that he's old and she is much younger.

 

"Now she asked me if she can get my house (7-8 m) when i die."

 

Either old or terminal illness or she is thinking 40 years ahead.

 

 

[seancbk]

Just now, Justfine said:

"Now she asked me if she can get my house (7-8 m) when i die."

 

Either old or terminal illness or she is thinking 40 years ahead.

 

 

 

He referred to her as his girlfriend, maybe she's trying to see if he intends her to be his last girlfriend (i.e she becomes the beneficiary of his will) or if after a few years he plans to break up and find another young woman to date.


 

[Justfine]

Just now, seancbk said:

 

He referred to her as his girlfriend, maybe she's trying to see if he intends her to be his last girlfriend (i.e she becomes the beneficiary of his will) or if after a few years he plans to break up and find another young woman to date.


 

Odds on he's old.

[speckio]

you said, Girlfriend correct not wife?

Why would she think she should be entitled to your house especially after breaking your heart????

I would have immediately said no without a second thought ... Anyone with a once of common sense would never consider giving their house to an ex-girlfriend!   

Absolutely Astounding that you are even thinking about giving your home to someone that will more than likely no longer be in your life within the next year!!!!

 

tell her if she wants your house you should get married see how she reacts to that.

 

 

Edited February 14, 2018 by speckio

[Justfine]

"last girlfriend"

 

you think he's 30yo and not going to have another one for 50 years?

[crazykopite]

Feel for you fella but when you take on a woman you have to take care of them . As for the house you may think you own it but you don’t as a farang is not allowed to own a property in Thailand . If you are as miserable as you sound maybe it is time to make a split with her . Whatever you decide I wish you well .

[3421abc]

Say yes and you might be dead by the end of the year. 

Get rid of this piece of scum gf you have. She is obviously not a good person.

[metisdead]

Off topic trolling/bickering posts and replies have been removed.