Anyone else getting this? It's Deja vu all over again, or the worst joke version of Groundhog Day.  Either way, we're stuck in the funny zone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edit: After I posted this it all reset itself.

 

 

A verbal-fight between  husband and wife

             *WIFE*
_I wrote your name on sand,_
_it got washed..._
_I wrote your name in air,_
_it was blown away..._
_Then, I wrote your name in my heart & got a Heart Attack!_ 🙄

          *HUSBAND*
_God saw me hungry,_
_he created pizza._
_He saw me thirsty,_
_he created Pepsi._
_He saw me in the dark,_
_he created light._
_He saw me without problems, he created YOU!_ 😏

                 *WIFE*
_Twinkle twinkle little star._
_You should know what you are._
_And once you know what you are,_
_Mental hospital is not so far!_ 🤨 

             *HUSBAND*
_The rain makes all things beautiful._
_The grass and flowers too._
_If rain makes all things beautiful,_
_Why doesn't it rain on you?_ 🙄

               *WIFE* 
_Roses are red; Violets are blue;_
_Monkeys like you should be kept in zoo._ 😠
                               
            *Husband*
_Don't feel so angry_
_you will find me there too_
_Not in a cage but laughing at you!_ 🥴

I just started a business building yachts in my attic.

Sails are through the roof!

The next person that asks me for rum, pineapple juice, cranberry juice, lemonade and a slice of orange in the same glass is going to get a punch!

I'm off to Greenwich in a bit. Need to figure out what to do in the mean time!

I just saw a man being arrested by an albino policeman.

I thought, "That's a fair cop."

I was invited to a wedding.

When I reached the hotel I found two doors.

On the doors was;

1. Bride’s relatives

2. Groom’s relatives

I entered the one for groom’s relatives and found two more doors;

1. Ladies

2. Gentlemen

I went through the one marked for gentlemen, only to find two more doors;

1. People with gifts

2. People without gifts

I went through the door for people without gifts and found myself in the alleyway behind the hotel.

Some women are gathered and the subject of conversation

turns to sex and then birth control. The first woman says

"We're Catholic so we can't use it."

The next woman says "I am too but we use the rhythm

method."

The third woman says "We use the bucket and saucer

method."

"What the heck is the bucket and saucer method?", the others

ask.

"Well, I'm five foot eleven... and my husband is five foot two. We

make love standing up with him standing on a bucket, and

when his eyes get big as saucers I kick the bucket out from

under him."

43 minutes ago, roo860 said:

Brilliant...classic Spike Milligan as "<deleted> Paddy" and Eric Sykes in happier non-woke days. 👍😆😆

2 hours ago, Zyxel said:

I can just see the 2 buns, ready for the burger! 😎

SongKran Toilet ..............