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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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34 minutes ago, oxo1947 said:

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Looks like she's trying to smuggle a chihuahua through customs.

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A paperboy is doing his monthly round of collecting money from customers. One door is opened by a fairly sexy, buxom woman, who is wearing a transparent lace negligee.

“Hi Missus I’ve come for the paper money, it’s $5 please.” says our boy, with his hand held out.

“I’m afraid I’ve no money in the house, ” the woman replies in a breathy voice, “but if you come in I’m sure I can think of something. . .”

So our lad goes in and the woman throws herself back on the fireside rug,

pulling off the negligee, moaning “You can have ME instead. . .”

The kid sighs, takes off his bag, and then produces a dick that would be more in place on a stud bull. The woman is agog. Our lad then produces a load of big rubber rings from his bag, which he proceeds to stack around his giant knob.

“What are they for?” asks the woman.

“Oh, they’re just to make sure I don’t go all the way in when I shag you.” replies the boy.

“To hell with them! implores the woman, “I’ll take all of you!”

Our lad replies. . .

“Not for five f.....g dollars you wont!”

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Man goes into a pub and says to the landlord, "Quick, give me a double whisky before the trouble starts!"
The landlord serves him up his whisky and the man downs it quickly.
"Quick, another double before the trouble starts!"
Landlord again obliges and the man drinks it. The man does it a third time. After the customer downs the third double whisky, the landlord asks,
"What's this trouble then?"
"I haven't got any money to pay for the drinks" replies the man.

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1 hour ago, Zyxel said:

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Where did you get the photo of my cat?

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