Karl Marx, the famous philosopher. No one ever mentions his sister Onya, who invented the starting pistol.

2 hours ago, bluesofa said:

Karl Marx, the famous philosopher. No one ever mentions his sister Onya, who invented the starting pistol.

Or his brother Skid who invented the bum gun !!

6 hours ago, bluesofa said:

Karl Marx, the famous philosopher. No one ever mentions his sister Onya, who invented the starting pistol.

Little known fact: Marx always used cheap tea bags. Because all proper tea is theft.

That Friends reunion took its toll !!

 

Meanwhile, in deepest darkest Arkansas !!

 

Coronavirus Pandemic, day 16.
 If anyone is still out there, I’m alive but struggling. Food is running low. Down to only 459 days worth. My hands are super sanitized and my butt is super clean. Down to 1599 rounds of ammo (dropped 1 round down the heat vent while doing daily inventory). Power still on, but for how long? Missing human interaction but I have my dogs. for now.. (I'm soaking their food in BBQ sauce in an attempt to marinate them from the inside in case I have to eat them) . I fear dark days ahead. News is all bad. Neighbors have attempted to leap from windows to their death, (or near death... most have single story homes so they are badly bruised). Blew through most Netflix series so may have to rewatch some again..Basic Survival is a definite challenge. I vow to persevere to the end, I am a survivor! Please, if there is life out there, communicate with me to help preserve my sanity..
 

the blowdry

 

 

 

A wife arrived home from a shopping trip and was shocked to find her husband in bed with a lovely young woman.
Just as she was about to storm out of the house, her husband called out "Perhaps you should hear how all this came about...
I was driving home when I saw this young woman looking tired and bedraggled. I brought her home and made her a meal from the roast beef you had forgotten about in the fridge.
She was bare-footed so I gave her your good sandals which you had discarded because they had gone out of style.
She was cold so I gave her the sweater which I bought for your birthday but you never wore because you reckoned the colour didn't suit you.
Her pants were torn, so I gave her a pair of your jeans, which were perfectly good, but too small for you now.
Then just as she was about to leave, she asked, 'Is there anything else your wife doesn't use anymore ?'"

The missus and kids are really <deleted> off with me. I put ginger in their curry...

They loved that cat!

Hands up all those who think the dog should sleep outside from now on ??

 

9 hours ago, ballpoint said:

I liked that joke ... not a lot, but I liked it.