47 minutes ago, ExpatOilWorker said:

There are probably more airplane (wrecks) than active submarines in the ocean. 

And at least as many wrecked submarines in the sky as active airplanes in the ocean...

7 hours ago, Lenny the Loser said:

They ain't speaking Thai.

no flies on you Leonard. 

1 minute ago, roo860 said:

no flies on you Leonard. 

well spotted.

????

 

15 minutes ago, roo860 said:

no flies on you Leonard. 

well spotted.

I didn't know that flies were spotted,

I do know leopords are spotted as well as some others but not Flies!

the government today... 

 

 

 

 

Top Tip of the Day:
If all else fails, stop using all else.

I wanted to request installing a suggestion box at work,
but I had no way of doing it.

One morning a man comes into church on crutches. He stops in front of the holy water and splashes some of it on both of his legs, then throws away his crutches. An altar boy witnessed the episode and runs into the rectory to tell the priest what he'd just seen.
Without batting an eye, the priest says, 'Son, you've just witnessed a miracle. Tell me, where is this man?
'Flat on his ar5e, Father, over by the holy water."

VOTED BEST JOKE IN IRELAND

 

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me Life, between the legs of me wife!"
 
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!
 
He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night."

She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?"
 
John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."

"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!” Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street Corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary."
 
She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been in there twice in the last four years. Once I had to pull him by the ears to make him come, and the other time he fell asleep".

 
 

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