Finance in divorce

[trigger571]

Post for anyone who has previously divorced. I was married for 12 years with one child. Now getting divorced so I am wondering if anyone knows what is considered a reasonable monthly allowance for the child - according to Thai law there is no such thing for the woman. Incidentally she works in her own business which to the day I still subsidize but that will also stop by the end of the year as she must make her own ends meet. I’m not a bank.

 

i am thinking 25,000 per month for my child plus half education and medical bills. Sound fair?

Edited January 16, 2020 by trigger571

[BritManToo]

3,000bht/month is what the court usually suggests.

Agree to pay that, then you can give more (unofficially) if she plays ball about access/visiting, etc.

Edited January 16, 2020 by BritManToo

[bkk6060]

I am sure you are aware you also will be required to split assets with her.

 

[SteveK]

25k a month is way too much in a country where the average wage is less than that.

[bkk6060]

There are several factors involved for the amount of child support.  The health and lifestyle of the child prior to divorce, ability to pay, in private schools, etc.

The goal is to not upset their current lifestyle or living conditions.

3,000 a month would be a bare minimum probably from a father/payer with very little money.

But, it sounds like you care about your kid and can pay more so do what you think is right as long as all funds are for the childs needs.

 

[HHTel]

When I divorced, my two kids stayed with me and agreed by the court.

The court did order my ex-wife to pay half of the costs of raising the children.  However, I never followed up on that.  I was quite able to finance them myself.

There is a children's court (depending on the age of the children) where they have a say in what should happen to them and what their wishes are.

 

My point is that I've found the court to be very fair in a divorce.  It doesn't matter whether you are Thai or a foreigner, the law treats both the same.  Many foreigners here believe that the court will always back the mother.  It's simply not true.

[spoon1967]

I was divorced back in 2016 after 6 years married, I have 1 child aged 7.

On the day of the divorce, we just went along to the Umphur and took a ticket, no appointment needed, same office we got married.  We were asked about finances, land house etc, all which I had no claim to anyway, then we were asked about child support, we agreed on 8k a month, that is now 6K, soon it will be 4k, then when I retire nothing, bearing in mind in Thai law, both parents are equally responsible for child support.  The reason for the drop and that I'll pay nothing when I retire is that I built a rubber plantation on my sons family land, 2600 trees, this was so they could be self sufficient, and could support my son, I want no gain from the plantation, and they already make an income off it. 

 

I visit my son every 3 months, visit his school, take him out of the village, the family are all good, and I do give them extra cash when I visit, buy all his school clothes etc, the grandparents look after him, ex is with new child and Thai husband and not at the house I built.   

 

I'm not prepared to fund my ex's new family, hence no funds when I retire in 2 years, the plantation I financed was for my son. 

 

5-10k is more than enough to take care of 1 child, don't forget whatever you pay, the mother should be paying the same, so don't let them say what you pay isn't enough.

 

PM me if you want more details on the divorce.

[maprao]

My step  son went to Tech school for 5 years. Works min 8 hours a day in Chonburi port with one day off a week. Gets 12,000 Baht (+some OT) a month. Takes care of his family with that. 25,000 is waaaaay too much????

Edited January 17, 2020 by maprao

[xtrnuno41]

IF you can and are willing to do 25000 baht, no problem then.

Considering many Thai families dont even have such an income like that.

It is a generous offer.

[rech]

No allowance if you are smart, only directly pay all the bills for the kid.

Why giving her any money that she will use to travel ?

Because of trust ? yes, this is what you did 12 years ago when you had a child with her, you trusted her...

 

 

[Jaggg88]

On 1/16/2020 at 11:07 AM, BritManToo said:

3,000bht/month is what the court usually suggests.

Agree to pay that, then you can give more (unofficially) if she plays ball about access/visiting, etc.

4500bht/month if she lives in Bangkok

[herwin1234]

Your whole situation is totally unknown but in general 25000 allowance is completely out of touch with Thai reality and very naive to be that generous to an ex wife. In general, since i dont know your wife, one can be sure 25k will not be spend on the child. In general, the ex wife will soon have another lover and might altogether leave the child in the care of the grandparents.

3 or 4k a month, like the other posters suggested, is a very good starting point. Its best to give not too much each month and only give extras if you are treated with respect and can visit your child. Giving extra money should be the expetion, not the norm.

Divorced myself, i take care of my son, the ex wife gone, cant be more happy.

[BritManToo]

2 minutes ago, herwin1234 said:

Divorced myself, i take care of my son, the ex wife gone, cant be more happy.

Me too, I've kept my son, and her daughter (her daughter had the choice me and university, or granny and the village).

[khunPer]

On 1/16/2020 at 12:02 PM, trigger571 said:

i am thinking 25,000 per month for my child plus half education and medical bills. Sound fair?

I my view very fair, to more than fair, but it's really a question of personal knowledge, which only you know, and how attached you are to your child.

 

Thai courts has begun – from what I can read – to mention child support, it's normally in the level from 3,000 baht to 5,000 baht a month.

 

But I also know a case, a next door Thai neighbor, where the ex foreign husband provides all costs for the child, including International school fees, and furthermore let the former wife, and her new husband, stay in the house he paid for and registered in the child's name. The child spend time with the father during half of school summer holidays.

 

It's in my view a question of balance between what you are, or feel, obliged to, and what you feel is fair for the child, and what you can afford.

[Ireland32]

I give my ex , 4,000 b she wanted 3,000 , I help a lil bit with School stuff, it’s private, she lives in Moobaan Nowhere

Edited January 17, 2020 by Ireland32

[Macthehat]

This post has been a wake up call for me . I was giving 25/30k and getting nothing but more problems and cries for more . 

Thank you op , I have now seen the light. ????Hallelujah!

[Bigz]

I was going to say whatever you can afford for your child. 25k + the extras you have mentioned sounds fair, it will ensure a decent life for your kid. Don't get bogged down with the comments from the losers on this site who suggest that this is too much. Never forget that the kid is your blood and Thailand is not cheap anymore.

[473geo]

Don't know how much you put into the business, but if your wife continues to run it then surely she will subsidise it from your 25K so I guess the question is how much would be left to take care of your son?

[Autonuaq]

If you not want to take care of your child and still feel resoponcible for you child pay the thing you can control

Like school, sports, transport from and to school. The Medical insurance and other insurances as well the clothes toys 

To be sure of a ride then also provide a good rental car with maintance

As well have a nice place for your child to stay.

 

Then also provide food by sending tesco to them with what you ordered.

 

It is the cheapest way and have total control over your money.

 

Alternatively

If you are like most man. Man who not take much care of a child. Then just give some monthly money to buy off and leave a half thia chold behind that needs the care and protection of his non thai parent.

 

What I did?

Changed all and took the child with me.

 

 

[1FinickyOne]

On 1/16/2020 at 6:07 PM, BritManToo said:

3,000bht/month is what the court usually suggests.

Agree to pay that, then you can give more (unofficially) if she plays ball about access/visiting, etc.

This is actually quite a good idea.. kudos Britman2-to-too... though the amount is too low... giving 10-15 would be fine and then keep the rest and mete out as needed... and you will be seen as generous. 

 

of course, a lot of your fate depends upon what has been already said... if you have mentioned 25k per month, then give anything less - - you are then reneging and it will not be taken well... nobody wants to go backwards... 

[natway09]

For what it is worth would not pay anymore than 10,000 BHt to her in cash.

I would arrange to pay the school fees directly to the school/University

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/17/2020 at 12:02 AM, trigger571 said:

i am thinking 25,000 per month for my child plus half education and medical bills. Sound fair?

No. Average wage is way lower than that. My knowledge on that is out of date, so find out and offer half of it.

However, worth subsidising education if want child to have good one and also health care.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/18/2020 at 5:34 AM, Bigz said:

I was going to say whatever you can afford for your child. 25k + the extras you have mentioned sounds fair, it will ensure a decent life for your kid. Don't get bogged down with the comments from the losers on this site who suggest that this is too much. Never forget that the kid is your blood and Thailand is not cheap anymore.

Thailand is only expensive if want to live like rich farang.

[theonetrueaussie]

On 1/17/2020 at 11:34 PM, Bigz said:

I was going to say whatever you can afford for your child. 25k + the extras you have mentioned sounds fair, it will ensure a decent life for your kid. Don't get bogged down with the comments from the losers on this site who suggest that this is too much. Never forget that the kid is your blood and Thailand is not cheap anymore.

That is fine if you are paying 25k directly for your kid, if you are just giving it to the ex then she might only spend 1k on the kid and rest for herself....

[Thongkorn]

On 1/16/2020 at 11:20 AM, SteveK said:

25k a month is way too much in a country where the average wage is less than that.

Not now 28000 is about the norm

[HashBrownHarry]

On 1/17/2020 at 8:25 PM, Ireland32 said:

I give my ex , 4,000 b she wanted 3,000 , I help a lil bit with School stuff, it’s private, she lives in Moobaan Nowhere

4,000 a month is almost nothing, do you have a break down of what that's spent on?