if you're on a long-time visa, do you have to become a doormat?

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, BananaBandit said:

I currently have a Thai wife, married by village ceremony.  Might that carry any clout?   Or do you need the official amphur marriage?

Counts for nothing.

[Berkshire]

On 10/25/2020 at 11:56 AM, donnacha said:

I noticed pretty quickly that the expats who get into those sorts of situations always have entirely reasonable explanations for why they happened, and I have no reason to doubt their sincerity ... except that it always seems to happen, again and again, to the same guys, while most of us have drifted through decades here with no such experiences.
 

So true.  It's always this small number of expats who complain the most and the loudest.  If a farang thinks that the Thais hate him, disrespects him, and is out to get him, he will probably treat all Thais accordingly.  And if people get treated in this way, they will respond in kind.  That's what I've seen when farangs get into trouble in Thailand.  It's usually self-inflicted. 

[spidermike007]

No country that I have lived in or am aware of so far, is as limiting as Thailand. No country that is considered a third world country would consider forcing retirees to have $25,000 tied up in their banks, nor have them check in every 90 days our of the paranoia of immigration such as is here. No country that I know of expects a foreigner to provide 5 or 6 times the income per month of the average citizen living in their country.

 

What is going on here in this country to me, is maybe part of an attitude reflecting how our own countries treat our immigrants, maybe we are not wanted here, maybe other nationalities are more desired, maybe only the wealthiest people are invited to live here to join the other elitist thinkers in this country. None of us really know the motivation of immigration here. 

 

Whenever a country makes decision that affects literally thousands of people who are living there in peace, who offer no threat to their society and are willing to provide money and even our support into our new found countries, seems to me these are the type of people that should be welcomed with open arms. 
 
I have never been exposed to the type of utter confusion and chaos Thailand Immigration has caused so many of the people who come here to live and contribute financially to the culture. Those of you who say we would not be missed are wrong. If you take 50% of the 250,000 pensioners living here, you removed over 125,000 people paying monthly expenses, immigration fees, transportation, food and housing costs, plus caring for their kids in private or public schools, taking care of their Thai adopted families, building homes, buying cars and trucks, etc. This would cause damage to many people which could have been avoided, if the rules were laid out to be fair for both this government and expats. 

 

We are dealing with people and their families here not just numbers in the computer. Uprooting families and their kids and relatives, destroying many relationships of love and trust.
 

[BritManToo]

27 minutes ago, Berkshire said:

If a farang thinks that the Thais hate him, disrespects him, and is out to get him, he will probably treat all Thais accordingly. 

I don't think that about all Thais, but I do think it about the Thai government and most of it's immigration officers.

As for how I treat all people, I ignore them, same as I would do in my home country.

I've always been wealthy and educated, why would I choose to mix outside my peer group (with the poor and uneducated)?

(beyond immediate family of course)

[PFMills]

So if I understand correctly. 

You are under 50 years old, in Thailand now, renting everything, considering marriage at some time. But concerned that you may be asked to leave Thailand and in doing so loose everything you have invested in here.

From other posts I see that you are considering going back to the USA to sort out your future inheritance  and have even asked BritManToo if he can find you a 'Dusky Maiden'.  Not sure if that last bit can be classed as exactly bright.

Here is a way to look at things and an option. You have youth on your side but what is available here is quite often related to what you can offer. So having cleared that up.

Go back to the USA and sort out your financial affairs. Don't sell up, if there is a house involved rent it out.

Come back, buy yourself a second hand Merc or BMW. Two million baht would get you one a couple of years old and quite presentable. Don't worry about having to leave it behind as in a few short years it will be worth <deleted> all anyway.

 

Pay just that little bit extra and rent a nice apartment. Tend to dress smart casual and in a very short time word will get around and your phone will be 'red hot'.

Then you will have the option to replace the nightly rented 'Dusky Maiden' with the 24/7/365 one.

 

But choose carefully, treat her well and you could have a great life, with luck! She will want some security for her future so you will have to consider that.

Myself and my now 'Aging Asian Babe' who I married many years ago and lived with in the UK for a some years are living out the rest of our yeas here. She is an avid golfer which for me is great.

Of course it could all turn to <deleted> for you.
 

Edited October 26, 2020 by PFMills

[Airalee]

I can’t imagine why someone would get into a “two-bit fistfight” over someone’s else’s bad driving habits or “blatantly cutting in line”.  
 

Sounds extreme.

 

I knew a guy like that once.  Avoided having anything to do with him,

Edited October 26, 2020 by Airalee

[thaibeachlovers]

3 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

No country that I have lived in or am aware of so far, is as limiting as Thailand. No country that is considered a third world country would consider forcing retirees to have $25,000 tied up in their banks, nor have them check in every 90 days our of the paranoia of immigration such as is here. No country that I know of expects a foreigner to provide 5 or 6 times the income per month of the average citizen living in their country.

 

What is going on here in this country to me, is maybe part of an attitude reflecting how our own countries treat our immigrants, maybe we are not wanted here, maybe other nationalities are more desired, maybe only the wealthiest people are invited to live here to join the other elitist thinkers in this country. None of us really know the motivation of immigration here. 

 

Whenever a country makes decision that affects literally thousands of people who are living there in peace, who offer no threat to their society and are willing to provide money and even our support into our new found countries, seems to me these are the type of people that should be welcomed with open arms. 
 
I have never been exposed to the type of utter confusion and chaos Thailand Immigration has caused so many of the people who come here to live and contribute financially to the culture. Those of you who say we would not be missed are wrong. If you take 50% of the 250,000 pensioners living here, you removed over 125,000 people paying monthly expenses, immigration fees, transportation, food and housing costs, plus caring for their kids in private or public schools, taking care of their Thai adopted families, building homes, buying cars and trucks, etc. This would cause damage to many people which could have been avoided, if the rules were laid out to be fair for both this government and expats. 

 

We are dealing with people and their families here not just numbers in the computer. Uprooting families and their kids and relatives, destroying many relationships of love and trust.
 

and yet, those that have moved to LOS this century must have known all that, BUT they chose to stay anyway.

I didn't have to retire to live in LOS, but I chose to do so despite knowing that I wasn't really welcome.

Nothing about it is a surprise for any expat, unless been walking around with eyes and ears closed to reality, IMO.

I've always known that it could end quite suddenly and had a plan.

[thaibeachlovers]

2 hours ago, PFMills said:

Pay just that little bit extra and rent a nice apartment. Tend to dress smart casual and in a very short time word will get around and your phone will be 'red hot'.

Then you will have the option to replace the nightly rented 'Dusky Maiden' with the 24/7/365 one.

555555555555555555

 

The only ones that would make a phone "red hot" will be in it for the money. Soooo, basically prostitutes, IMO.

Edited October 26, 2020 by thaibeachlovers

[BritManToo]

13 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

those that have moved to LOS this century must have known all that, BUT they chose to stay anyway.

I didn't have to retire to live in LOS,

Not really,

I moved here in 2009, and the only requirement for my retirement 1 year Non-O was I was over 50 and had 120GBP to pay the Birmingham consulate for the VISA.

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, PFMills said:

Come back, buy yourself a second hand Merc or BMW. Two million baht would get you one a couple of years old and quite presentable. Don't worry about having to leave it behind as in a few short years it will be worth <deleted> all anyway.

My 50kbht Honda CB300F gets almost as much female attention (among the female university students) as any car, except maybe a Ferrari.

Edited October 26, 2020 by BritManToo

[from the home of CC]

doormat lol - if I had to live here feeling like that i would have been gone 20 years ago. In my opinion, living hassle free (from people) is more an intelligence test, with the lack of it causing most problems..

[onebir]

3 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

No country that I have lived in or am aware of so far, is as limiting as Thailand. No country that is considered a third world country would consider forcing retirees to have $25,000 tied up in their banks, nor have them check in every 90 days our of the paranoia of immigration such as is here

China doesn't have a retirement visa. Marriage visas don't come with work permits. There's no visa free entry (for western countries). You can only apply for visas in your home country/country of residence.

 

So at least one developing country 'royally' surpasses Thailand for visa stinginess...

[BritManToo]

30 minutes ago, onebir said:

China doesn't have a retirement visa. Marriage visas don't come with work permits. There's no visa free entry (for western countries). You can only apply for visas in your home country/country of residence.

 

So at least one developing country 'royally' surpasses Thailand for visa stinginess...

Not true, I didn't have any problem applying for a Chinese VISA in Chiang Mai and at a fraction of the price.

$25 in Chiang Mai Vs $125 in the UK.

 

I applied for my Chinese tourist VISA in Chiang Mai and flew to China 5 days later. Direct flights to Changsha 2,500bht return.

[onebir]

1 minute ago, BritManToo said:

Not true, I didn't have any problem applying for a Chinese VISA in Chiang Mai and at a fraction of the price.

$25 in Chiang Mai Vs $125 in the UK.

I don't think that's possible (any more) for someone in Thailand on a tourist visa.

 

Off-topic, did you like Changsha? (I lived there for several years.)

[BritManToo]

8 minutes ago, onebir said:

I don't think that's possible (any more) for someone in Thailand on a tourist visa.

Off-topic, did you like Changsha? (I lived there for several years.)

Just passed through on my way to the train station, I went hiking in Zhangjiajie national park for 10 days (Nov 2017). I was living in Chiang Mai on a Non-O VISA. It was a little cold but well worthwhile, no other foreigners anywhere, not even on the plane. No restrictions on my travel, nobody watching or following me, essentially the authorities totally ignored me.

 

Edited October 26, 2020 by BritManToo

[onebir]

3 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Just passed through on my way to the train station, I went hiking in Zhangjiajie national park for 10 days (Nov 2017). I was living in Chiang Mai on a Non-O VISA. It was a little cold but well worthwhile, no other foreigners anywhere, not even on the plane.

Good thing, Changsha is a bit of a dump! ????

 

[worgeordie]

I think....you  think too much.

regards worgeordie

[Pilotman]

13 minutes ago, worgeordie said:

I think....you  think too much.

regards worgeordie

or not enough?

[thaibeachlovers]

11 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Not really,

I moved here in 2009, and the only requirement for my retirement 1 year Non-O was I was over 50 and had 120GBP to pay the Birmingham consulate for the VISA.

You were lucky. The Auckland consulate didn't give 1 year non O for retirement. They only give them for marriage. I happened to be married at the time, but had I not been I'd have had to go to Wellington, a fate worse than death ( sarcasm alert for the humour devoid ).

[thaibeachlovers]

10 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Just passed through on my way to the train station, I went hiking in Zhangjiajie national park for 10 days (Nov 2017). I was living in Chiang Mai on a Non-O VISA. It was a little cold but well worthwhile, no other foreigners anywhere, not even on the plane. No restrictions on my travel, nobody watching or following me, essentially the authorities totally ignored me.

 

I see the benches for people to sit on. Perhaps the Chinese should take over Pattaya, then there might be some seats on the horrid beach walkway.

[NoshowJones]

On 10/25/2020 at 12:11 AM, Kwasaki said:

Over my years I've had 2 fights 1 helping a friend who was being attacked by ya-baa nutter and one at defending myself, I'm still here.

I have had a few fights in the UK, but never in Thailand, and I have been here for nearly 15 years, anyone who gets a sore face from me would need to be very badly in the wrong.

[NoshowJones]

On 10/25/2020 at 2:55 AM, mstevens said:

I think this is a really excellent topic. There is no guarantee that any foreigner living in Thailand can remain there indefinitely unless they have acquired Thai nationality - which very few do.

 

My worry was always what would happen if I unwittingly got in to a dispute with a Thai would not back down. Let's say something simple like they backed their car in to yours, and then tried to say it was your fault and went all out to "get you". Thais know foreigners living in the country are vulnerable in this respect and given that the justice system does not work as one might expect, the risk is real. Sure, it's not likely to happen, but there IS a risk.

 

I lived in Thailand for some years before returning home. The problem I had is that I never felt entirely secure when I was living there. There was always that small voice in the back of my head telling me that if I had bad luck and someone decided they didn't like me then I could be shown the door. I just can't live that way. I know some people dismiss the idea but I prefer to be a realist. It is one of the main reasons I prefer to live in my own country and return to Thailand for a holiday every so often.

Your second paragraph is one of the reasons I only keep enough money for living expenses here in Thailand. The rest stays in my UK bank.

[NoshowJones]

On 10/25/2020 at 11:56 AM, donnacha said:

I noticed pretty quickly that the expats who get into those sorts of situations always have entirely reasonable explanations for why they happened, and I have no reason to doubt their sincerity ... except that it always seems to happen, again and again, to the same guys, while most of us have drifted through decades here with no such experiences.

Part of that is realizing that it is not our job to make other people behave a certain way. If someone behaves like a dick, you avoid them and get on with all the far more interesting things you need to do that day. If someone cuts in line, consider that you are probably looking at someone with serious problems, possibly even just waiting for the excuse to get into a fight. Do you, with your comparatively wonderful life, really want to get dragged down into their Hell? 

Unless you put yourself in situations where friction is likely to arise, the vast majority of people here are obliging and surprisingly decent. Frankly, you have to be a bit of a dick to get into a bad situation OR have a poor ability to recognize when someone else is mentally troubled, and that includes romantic partners. Crazy can be entertaining and fun but, past your twenties, you need to grow up a bit, start to think longer term, and realize that the risks simply aren't worth it.

 

I agree with everything in this post, but I will never allow anyone to jump in front of me in a queue, people have tried it many times and no one has yet succeeded.

[robblok]

Not sure why anyone would worry about a fistfight. Why would you even get into one if someone drives on the sidewalk. It happens get over it. Does not give you the right to attack someone. I just avoid confrontation, but i did so in my home country too. I am no matcho who needs to defend his honor when he sees himself slightly wronged.

 

Best is just to change your attitude, fighting is for losers. It might be unavoidable at times if your attacked. But (unless the other person is a loon) chances are you could have defused the situation by swallowing some pride.

 

I know its had for some of the lower class people who come here and had regular fights back home. But fighting is just stupid.

[VocalNeal]

On 10/24/2020 at 9:52 PM, BananaBandit said:

i fear any little dispute with someone  (a person driving recklessly on sidewalks, blatantly cutting in line, etc.) 

 

When living in Asia you have to switch off all that western stuff and simply go with the flow, Then you will be fine.

 

Grasshopper are different magnitudes of what westerners have been brought up to believe are wrong. Just teach yourself not to react the lower levels. 

[NoshowJones]

17 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Not really,

I moved here in 2009, and the only requirement for my retirement 1 year Non-O was I was over 50 and had 120GBP to pay the Birmingham consulate for the VISA.

I moved here in 2005, and all I had to do was take a pleasant drive to the border every 90 days, and that was it. Look at it now.

What did you get for your 120 GBP? You must have had to do a border run.

[BritManToo]

14 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

I moved here in 2005, and all I had to do was take a pleasant drive to the border every 90 days, and that was it. Look at it now.

What did you get for your 120 GBP? You must have had to do a border run.

ME Non-O, exit country every 90 days. Trip to Mae Sai, trip to Mae Sot, buy some duty free booze.

Was still on them until last week, actually I'm still on one now, with an 'under consideration' for a 1 year extension.

No other choice really as I don't see exit/entry to Thailand becoming easy again in the near future (2+ years).

Edited October 27, 2020 by BritManToo

[Kwasaki]

57 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

I have had a few fights in the UK, but never in Thailand, and I have been here for nearly 15 years, anyone who gets a sore face from me would need to be very badly in the wrong.

Same me, I would try to avoid confrontation at all times if possible, it depends on the circumstances.

My problem is I can't be that person who will just watch and do nothing, espesually if someone hits me or a partner or friend who doesn't know how to defend themselves.

[BritManToo]

2 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

Same me, I would try to avoid confrontation at all times if possible, it depends on the circumstances.

My problem is I can't be that person who will just watch and do nothing, espesually if someone hits me or a partner or friend who doesn't know how to defend themselves.

I'm not a fighter .......

But I have enough money to pay local people that are, to do it for me at a later time and place of my choosing.

Assuming the woman I'm with didn't already knife them.

Edited October 27, 2020 by BritManToo

[Pilotman]

To live here its best to adopt the 'Grey Man' persona.  Do nothing to draw attention to yourself, like flashing gold jewellery around or driving a flash vehicle.  Driving into Tesco in a high end  Porsche,  dripping gold chains and playing the big western hero will get you noticed and that can be a very bad thing. Thankfully most of those types either live in Bangkok,  or have left due to Corvid.