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Paranoia?


StreetCowboy

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3 hours ago, StreetCowboy said:

Yerdedonthair aboot people wha invent personae, bytheway.  Ah huvnae met an imaginary friend who wisnae hangin' round wi ' a right  eejit. 

 

Raj

Ah ken fit like.

 

Love it, and understand every word. 

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41 minutes ago, AgMech Cowboy said:

Psalms 23:1 The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want. 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for Thou art with me; Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me. 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

 

I've no paranoia. Although I have sinned many times, I am prepared.

God or another one forgives you...... lol

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A nutter walks into a bar in Aberdeen, and all my mates laugh and bet he's going to talk to me! 

I often wonder, not worry, about my sanity as I do seem to relate to those with mental disorders. I worked in a mental hospital as a gardener when I was 17 and it was the best job I've had in my life(man, those cadet nurses:)) and I worked with all sorts of patients and saw many cases of insanity. One day patient came in a Ferrari and when having a cup of tea, would  think he was a dog, running around the room biting people, for example. I was taking many magic mushrooms at this time and started to understand the difference in altered consciousnesses and the thin line between sanity and insanity. I think many don't actually understand what real psychosis is, including those working in Psychology. 

When I was 25, due to alcoholism and amphetamines, I crossed that line for a couple of days and it is very scary. Real paranoia, hallucinations, a totally psychotic state. Luckily manage to quit the drink and drugs and not experienced it again, although I would say I am often paranoid, in the everyday kind of sense. I think living for most of my life in Thailand has made me slightly paranoid, often people are out to get me, as a farang.

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I worked in a State Mental Hospital for two summers.

Freaked me out.

 

This is not a joke.

 

When working with crazy people, in a hospital setting, one begins to worry that one will become crazy, too.

Perhaps, I did.

 

Fortunately for most Mental Hospital caretakers and technicians, they had us on psychotropic drugs as a prophylactic measure. 

Edited by GammaGlobulin
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1 minute ago, GammaGlobulin said:

I worked in a State Mental Hospital for two summers.

Freaked me out.

 

This is not a joke.

 

When working with crazy people, in a hospital setting, one begins to worry that one will become crazy, too.

Perhaps, I did.

I also worked for the summer in one. I used to drive a tractor with a trailer with 10 patients in it, some of whom had been sentenced to time in the hospital after serious crimes. Sometimes, they would have gardening implements that could cause serious injury. It was scary at times. 

Off topic but I remember Joey Ramone used to hang out in mental hospitals for the women. One woman I knew was often seen in the bushes with a man! 

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1 hour ago, toofarnorth said:

Yesterday upon the stair I met a man that wasn't there , he wasn't there again today , I wish that man would go away.

 

Many years ago I first heard that , I don't know where from either .

Called ‘Antigonish’ and usually referred to as ‘I met a man who wasn’t there’ is a poem written by William Hughes Mearns in 1899. One of the few I recall verbatim from learning as a child.

 

Yesterday, upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
I wish, I wish he'd go away...

When I came home last night at three
The man was waiting there for me
But when I looked around the hall
I couldn't see him there at all!
Go away, go away, don't you come back any more!
Go away, go away, and please don't slam the door... (slam!)

Last night I saw upon the stair
A little man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
Oh, how I wish he'd go away...

 

 

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Is it VERSE Ye Want?

Then, VERSE Thee Shalt have!

And, Paranoia in thy verse, aplenty.

 

Is this a dagger which I see before me,
The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? or art thou but
A dagger of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.
Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going;
And such an instrument I was to use.
Mine eyes are made the fools o' the other senses,
Or else worth all the rest; I see thee still,
And on thy blade and dudgeon gouts of blood,
Which was not so before. There's no such thing:
It is the bloody business which informs
Thus to mine eyes. Now o'er the one halfworld
Nature seems dead, and wicked dreams abuse
The curtain'd sleep; witchcraft celebrates
Pale Hecate's offerings, and wither'd murder,
Alarum'd by his sentinel, the wolf,
Whose howl's his watch, thus with his stealthy pace.
With Tarquin's ravishing strides, towards his design
Moves like a ghost. Thou sure and firm-set earth,
Hear not my steps, which way they walk, for fear
Thy very stones prate of my whereabout,
And take the present horror from the time,
Which now suits with it. Whiles I threat, he lives:
Words to the heat of deeds too cold breath gives.
                                    [DING DONG, DING DONG, a bell rings]
I go, and it is done; the bell invites me.
Hear it not, Duncan; for it is a knell
That summons thee to heaven or to heck.
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1 hour ago, toofarnorth said:

Yesterday upon the stair I met a man that wasn't there , he wasn't there again today , I wish that man would go away.

 

Many years ago I first heard that , I don't know where from either .

That William Hughes Mearns pome was used in the 2003 movie "Identity", a good thriller movie about a guy with multiple personality disorder, worth watching again.

 

 

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1 minute ago, HighPriority said:

As soon as I saw the topic I knew you were all in here talking about ME !

It took starting this topic for you to realise?
You're just as oblivious as everyone says.

 

Have you figured out what this topic is intended to distract you from?

 

Do you know where the white van that was parked outside your house has gone?
Did you even notice it was there?

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On 8/16/2021 at 2:24 AM, StreetCowboy said:

Is anyone out to get you?
Are they looking over your shoulder?
Do you sometimes think that if you just kept quiet, they might let you get on with your life?
Does your mother say "Ignore them, and they'll go away"?
Do you ever imagine a time of peaceful meadows and greener pastures?
Do you ever wish you had a longer stick?

Yes

Yes

No

Mother is dead

Not my imagination. I grew up surrounded by peaceful fields and green pastures.

Is that a reference to a dumbstick?

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 8/17/2021 at 12:53 PM, GammaGlobulin said:

Is it VERSE Ye Want?

Then, VERSE Thee Shalt have!

And, Paranoia in thy verse, aplenty.

 

Is this a dagger which I see before me,
The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? or art thou but
A dagger of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.
Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going;
And such an instrument I was to use.
Mine eyes are made the fools o' the other senses,
Or else worth all the rest; I see thee still,
And on thy blade and dudgeon gouts of blood,
Which was not so before. There's no such thing:
It is the bloody business which informs
Thus to mine eyes. Now o'er the one halfworld
Nature seems dead, and wicked dreams abuse
The curtain'd sleep; witchcraft celebrates
Pale Hecate's offerings, and wither'd murder,
Alarum'd by his sentinel, the wolf,
Whose howl's his watch, thus with his stealthy pace.
With Tarquin's ravishing strides, towards his design
Moves like a ghost. Thou sure and firm-set earth,
Hear not my steps, which way they walk, for fear
Thy very stones prate of my whereabout,
And take the present horror from the time,
Which now suits with it. Whiles I threat, he lives:
Words to the heat of deeds too cold breath gives.
                                    [DING DONG, DING DONG, a bell rings]
I go, and it is done; the bell invites me.
Hear it not, Duncan; for it is a knell
That summons thee to heaven or to heck.

We all get a bit carried away sometimes, and do things we later regret.

Blank verse, by way of soliloquy in response, is not something I've attempted yet.

The greatest criminal, the regicide, is no different from any other

Were we to see him as a victim, not an enemy, as our brother. 

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