Do You Sometimes Find Yourself Forced into Intolerable Sycophantic Behavior Just to Placate Your Landlord?

[GammaGlobulin]

My Dear Friends,

 

The only reason I mention this is to ask if you, like I, have occasionally been compelled to resort to insincere praises and other Machiavellian wiles, just to keep your relationship with your landlord going swimmingly enough, and greased enough?

 

It’s my guess that a majority of us do not own our own homes, here away from home  And therefore, most of us must be renters while here.

 

What are the strategies you use to placate your landlords and landladies? Do you curtsy? How do you stroke their egos in order to get what you deserve, after paying your rent on time?

 

It has been said that completely-direct confrontation when something goes amiss, especially in Thai culture, is not the best way to handle most situations.  And, certainly, this is true.

 

And, if this is definitely the case, then what do you do?

 

Do you often feel tempted to assume the demeanor of Uriah Heep, and feign the demanded obsequiousness that makes you squirm?

 

Let me state this another way.  Let’s say that you rented the cheapest room at the Peninsula in Hong Kong. And let us say that the bed was not turned down properly, to your liking.  Then, in this case, would you even hesitate to raise a stink? Of course you would not. And I am not just talking about missing chocolates on your pillow at night.

 

But here, in Thailand, things are often different, and we must accept these different strokes.  If you express dissatisfaction with a service you paid for, then it is really still not acceptable to redress this, or any shortcoming, using a “direct’ approach.

 

And, since the direct approach is never acceptable, then how do you handle things?

 

Personally, I am unable to say what the best approach might be. Nothing has worked for me, so far… Maybe it’s because, after reading Dickens, I find pretended unctuousness to be ridiculous.

 

And this is the purpose of my asking if the Uriah Heep approach might be the correct approach, and the enlightened approach, just to keep everybody happy when renting from a landlady who is the top hen of her tiny guest-house roost.

 

 

Normally, we might think that insincerity and “umbleness” should be considered as negative qualities, having read David Copperfield, and other great books by Dickens.  However, when living under the thumb of a landlady, and in order to get the best service, might not a bit of eating Humble Pie, once in a while, not improve the life of any decent rent-paying tenant?

 

In my view, some landladies and landlords run their establishments without benefit of any college degree in Hospitality. This means that they have no schooled perspective on any “norm” of what is or should be considered acceptable service while running their fiefdom-like guesthouses.

 

At least, we can be thankful that we are not living in Judge Alvin’s guesthouse, I guess.

 

Having lived in Asia for most of my life, I have learned to state things more obliquely than I might, if I had lived in NYC and other nearby places longer than I did. NYC is not Thailand, I guess.  And Kansas is not New Jersey.

 

Sometimes, when I feel a bit “put upon” by my landlady, then I just compare her unfavorably to Judge Alvin, a man of great respect and true hospitality. And then, I sometimes feel relieved in the comparison.

 

I just consider her to be an honorable reeve.

A reeve of the same ilk whom I must pleasingly placate.

 

 

Being a tenant here is not easy.

And, being a rich or poor Dickens character in a real-life guesthouse, is equally not easy.

Still, maybe it is better than being an orphan in London, or sweeping chimneys, many years ago.

Too much soot.

 

Regards,

GGlobulin

 

 

 

 

 

[OneMoreFarang]

I have to admit I had to google that word. This is what I found.

No, I never applauded that idiot.

[HappyExpat57]

"Do You Sometimes Find Yourself Forced into Intolerable Sycophantic Behavior Just to Placate Your Landlord?"

 

No, never. I pay rent on time and am a good renter.  I hold up my end of the deal, I fully expect the landlord to do the same. It may make a difference as I have rental properties myself and appreciate a good renter. As well, I am fully aware of my responsibilities as a landlord to keep good renters.

 

I am polite, being an ambassador from a foreign country, but lickspittle behavior? Again - no, never.

[Lacessit]

I fulfill my obligations as a tenant. I pay on time, and look after a landlord's place as if it were my own. I have had landlords express regret when I moved out.

As to the OP's question, no. Any landlord wanting worship would not get me for a tenant.

[HappyExpat57]

12 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

I fulfill my obligations as a tenant. I pay on time, and look after a landlord's place as if it were my own. I have had landlords express regret when I moved out.

As to the OP's question, no. Any landlord wanting worship would not get me for a tenant.

I rent on again off again at the Residence@Dreams (formerly La Royale) in Na Jomtien. The staff LOVES me and are always happy to see me return. I make no problems for anyone and, when I'm there at Christmas time, bring down a few nice bottles - Tequila with all the fixin's, Baileys, Jim Beam and some flavored rum. I also do a few favors for the building manager, and as a result, we genuinely enjoy a symbiotic relationship/mutualism. No need to curry favor.

[zoza]

i think i got off on the wrong foot with my landlord, she wanted a deposit as soon as i informed her i was interested in renting one of her condo's, ok it was only 2000 baht

but this was a new one to me, i paid up as i was interested.

then when we had chosen a condo she asked for another deposit, and i was a bit miffed as i had gone past several ATM's on my way to her office, and i had not been informed before hand, so i asked why was i  not told before ? to which she said i told your wife?

instead of escalating this problem i tried to make a joke of ''after 16 years married we do not talk that much''  when i completed the deal all was ok but after six months i found that the contract only had 7k as deposit when i had paid 14k ? now my wife said no i think that is right (i find Thais are scared of any Thai who they think has big money or a uniform) 

so rather than make a big fuss i let it slide, does anyone know an honest solicitor in Pattaya i know two and one is English but it would probably cost as much or maybe more, and this landlord knows and plays knowing the Thais will back down in most cases, so it would my word against hers.

[animalmagic]

My wife is my landlord...........so the answer is, yes!

[1FinickyOne]

Me too.. wife is my landlord... and she doesn't stop there.. lord in general... 

[topt]

 

5 hours ago, HappyExpat57 said:

No need to curry favor.

Some would argue that this does -

5 hours ago, HappyExpat57 said:

when I'm there at Christmas time, bring down a few nice bottles - Tequila with all the fixin's, Baileys, Jim Beam and some flavored rum.

But not me 

[newnative]

No.  Just one of the joys of owning.

[blazes]

Hard to see what is the point of this thread.  Those of us who rent (the wise ones, incidentally!) are most likely to be renting a condo.   Having found our preferred condo via a real estate agent, we then pay a one- or two-month deposit  and pay our rent at the beginning of the month at the agent's office or via a bank deposit.

 

Where's the problem here?  We never need to meet the landlord, ever.  And if we do in fact meet the landlord at the beginning or end of our rental period, it's just a perfectly normal polite conversation and that's it. 

[spidermike007]

Absolutely not. I don't dance in circles for anyone. I pay my rent on time and take very good care of the property. If anyone should be the sycophant, it should be my landlord. Fortunately, she is a kind and decent woman. And is very responsive when something needs to be fixed or done. 

 

I would rather move than have to behave in such an insincere and silly fashion. I am not very good at groveling. Never been my forte. 

[StreetCowboy]

Back in the day, One evening, my landlord came round substantially the worse for wear to collect rent from the boys next door.  We went to assist, and pulled our landlord away while he was futilely trying to lay into one of the boys, and assisted him back to his van, and he drove off. It was some days before I felt safe to cycle again.

”don’t worry, if he hasn’t sobered up by new he’ll have wrecked the van”

”Aye, but what if he’s bought another one?”

[wombat]

A bottle of JW mixers and ice goes a long way

[Grusa]

Are you competing with @BostonBob for a Pullitzer? ????

 

[zzaa09]

Dependent on no one.

Some are like that. 

Most aren't.

[alex8912]

With all those big words the OP should be owning something in LOS by now. 

[StreetCowboy]

1 hour ago, alex8912 said:

With all those big words the OP should be owning something in LOS by now. 

To quote from a random internet post:

Sometimes I use big words for which I don’t know the meaning, so that I sound more photosynthesis.

[radiochaser]

1 hour ago, StreetCowboy said:

To quote from a random internet post:

Sometimes I use big words for which I don’t know the meaning, so that I sound more photosynthesis.

Sum time whin I reed big wurds I turn green wit invy!

[Tropposurfer]

20 hours ago, animalmagic said:

My wife is my landlord...........so the answer is, yes!

Ahh yes; 'She who must be obeyed'. A wise man indeed.

[animalmagic]

1 hour ago, Tropposurfer said:

Ahh yes; 'She who must be obeyed'. A wise man indeed.

More of a coward than a wise man, to be honest!

[Luuk Chaai]

My wife is the landlord ...  a simple 30k Baht every couple of weeks keeps everything smooth as silk

[The Hammer2021]

No

[GammaGlobulin]

On 8/13/2022 at 1:42 PM, blazes said:

Hard to see what is the point of this thread.  Those of us who rent (the wise ones, incidentally!) are most likely to be renting a condo.   Having found our preferred condo via a real estate agent, we then pay a one- or two-month deposit  and pay our rent at the beginning of the month at the agent's office or via a bank deposit.

 

Where's the problem here?  We never need to meet the landlord, ever.  And if we do in fact meet the landlord at the beginning or end of our rental period, it's just a perfectly normal polite conversation and that's it. 

Perhaps I should have qualified this topic, a bit, but also not necessarily.

 

If you are renting a condo, then you are correct in your assumption that you are less likely to encounter difficulties caused by the vagaries of tiny landlords who are renting out just one or two properties.

 

If you are renting through a larger company, a rental agency, such as with a time-share property, then you might be less likely to encounter difficulties.

 

Also, possibly, it is a totally different situation for those who are renting a house from an owner who has only one or two houses to let.

 

Why not try renting a house from a landlord who is renting out one of his houses, where he lives next-door, or in the same village.  Then, please, let us know, in the future, whether or not you will be singing the same tune.

 

Finding a great landlord and a great property is not as easy as you might think...only IMHO.

 

 

[GammaGlobulin]

On 8/13/2022 at 9:06 PM, StreetCowboy said:

To quote from a random internet post:

Sometimes I use big words for which I don’t know the meaning, so that I sound more photosynthesis.

Photosynthetical, you mean?  You write photosynthetically; you sound photosynthetical.  Obviously, you do.

 

(The word photosynthetically is a valid adverb.  However, the word photosynthetical is a new one left up to your imagination.)

 

 

[champers]

2 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Photosynthetical

That's bigger than marmalade. I'm impressed.

[GammaGlobulin]

1 hour ago, champers said:

That's bigger than marmalade. I'm impressed.

Well, actually, we can speak about chlorophyll being photosynthetically active at various ranges of radiation.  And therefore, this adverb is a valid adverb.

 

However, if one were to say that one is photosynthetical, then one would just assume one might be speaking about his love of a green plant of some sort. Although, I doubt that many people use this adjective.

 

I have never heard of anyone referring to a person as being photosynthetical, except, maybe....

 

Are you a green plant?

 

Do you convert sunlight into usable energy?

 

Or, are you the type of person having mitochondria in your cells, rather than chlorophyll?

 

By the way, I guess you might recall that.....

 

MITOCHONDRIA are the POWERHOUSES of the Cell!!!!

 

((How many times have you heard this phrase, "the powerhouse of the cell"?))

 

If I hear this phrase, powerhouse of the cell, one more time,....

 

Then....

 

 

 

[StreetCowboy]

On 8/16/2022 at 12:45 AM, GammaGlobulin said:

Photosynthetical, you mean?  You write photosynthetically; you sound photosynthetical.  Obviously, you do.

 

(The word photosynthetically is a valid adverb.  However, the word photosynthetical is a new one left up to your imagination.)

 

 

The comedian has no idea how funny is his joke.  And if he had to explain it, he has failed. I will assume you are just being obtuse.

[GammaGlobulin]

On 8/17/2022 at 10:55 PM, StreetCowboy said:

The comedian has no idea how funny is his joke.  And if he had to explain it, he has failed. I will assume you are just being obtuse.

Only as obtuse as usual.

[StreetCowboy]

14 minutes ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Only as obtuse as usual.

If you’re not a cutie you might as well be obtuse.