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What was the outcome when your daughter found out your TGF was younger than her?


Nemises

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What age difference is ok, what is bad? For the few posters that think an age gap is deplorable?  Where is the creepy line?  What if the guy is real handsome at 70?  What if he has an overweight less attractive woman?  Does this change your mind?  I recall there was some study about this.    I think using the term hedonism is a bit drastic.  

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1 hour ago, HandsomeTallFarang said:

What exactly about it is sad, Mr. kwa? Was it the part about that he values the relationship with his own family and kids over choosing to have an embarrassing union with some much younger woman -- who doesn't actually like him in any way romantically -- in exchange for a financial pittance? I too, would choose to uphold my own relationship, perception, and standing with my real family and friends over shameless hedonism and toxic relationship arrangements, but I'm not a Boomer (who have a collective PhD in hedonism), so what do I know?

 

 

Boy, that sure is sad alright. The idea that anyone would ever want to have dignity, and choosing not to live a life dedicated entirely to themselves and their own mindless self-indulgence and hedonism 100% of the time. Truly a sad sight to behold ???? 

 

 

All that rage isn't healthy, even for tall handsome farangs. If you want to make it to old age (and young TGFs) you should mellow out a bit ????

 

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1 hour ago, Elkski said:

What age difference is ok, what is bad? For the few posters that think an age gap is deplorable?  Where is the creepy line?  What if the guy is real handsome at 70?  What if he has an overweight less attractive woman?  Does this change your mind?  I recall there was some study about this.    I think using the term hedonism is a bit drastic.  

20yo man, 75yo woman.

 

Whats your take?

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6 hours ago, Isaan sailor said:

My daughter’s cool with my younger Thai wife—although my daughter is still younger.  She knows I will leave an inheritance when I go—and she wants her piece of that pie.

Well I'd like to think my kids love me a little bit more than just what I'm gonna leave them.

 

I'd dump any woman if it meant keeping my children on side.

 

At the end of the day, you are related to your children by blood, some random gf you pick up, will drop you like a pair of dirty underwear when the money runs out

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45 minutes ago, arithai12 said:

The focus here seems to be on the age only, and people overlook the fact that a much younger girlfriend is often a lower education / no conversation girl who sees the old farang boyfriend as a means to secure life for herself and her family back in the village. I know I should not generalize, but this is often the case. A farang daughter would see the reality in the blink of an eye.

Well thats the other factor often overlooked.

That 20 something, with the 60 something is probably educated to middle school level at best.

 

They have no conversation, let alone a real adult relationship.

 

Kids see that, and know it for what it is.

 

I'm happy that my Thai wife is old enough to be my American daughters Mom, and they treat her as such.

 

If I'd have a Thai wife their age, things would be very different

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The outcome for me wasn’t good at first with my youngest daughter but great now.

When my Thai gf became pregnant, her family put pressure upon her for pregnancy outside wedlock.

So I decided to go with the flow and agreed with a ‘Thai blessing’, which they see as a marriage!

 I told my 5 children. The eldest two who are 5&6 years older than my partner were ok with it.

But my youngest, in her 30’s, appeared to disapprove, her email stating that she didn’t understand me, blah blah blah. I replied saying I understood because when I went through some emotional trauma after separation from her mother, I never shared this with her, I felt it not to be her business but dealt with it myself. She didn’t reply but as fate had it my partner had a miscarriage. So I visited them all on holiday shortly after and was able to give an account of events and partner’s background etc Partner is a Teacher. They all seemed okay.

Then on my next visit I took my partner and all was okay, they got on well, became friends on fb etc

And then the youngest one came to Thailand ( her 3rd visit) with her bf and stayed with us.

Alls well that ends well!

 I have never interfered nor disapproved of their relationships, regardless of age, race, color, sexual orientation. They have to live their own life. We all have our own karma  plus inherited Karma, according to Yogic Science which is older than modern science!

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I don’t have a daughter but my good friend has three and they were ALL delighted that their Daddy was happy with his wife. Unfortunately, he died last year and she moved back to Thailand. Her period of mourning was real and sincere.  I was always very touched by how much she cared for him. Obviously, she had no bar background.

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My Daughter came to see me this year and we hadn't seen each other for 29yrs ! no vids or photos either (long story). she is 52 my wife is 47.  it didn't faze my daughter one bit, she has had 3 kids by 3 different men :giggle:.

My wife just gave her a big hug, and asked 

''when you come back again??'' :smile:

 

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My father said to me once, just after I'd taken him to Nana plaza, that he'd come here and get a young woman when my mother died. I was shocked! However, he died before my mother. 

I have known a few old dudes whose daughters didn't speak to them, and I understand why, they basically were sex addicts and their addiction caused them to forget their kids and grandkids. 

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13 minutes ago, jak2002003 said:

Would you guys be fine with your 20 year old good looking  daughters marrying an overweight 70 year old Thai immigrant to your country, who was only there on a retirement visa and could not speak a word of your own language, and who already had grown up kids and an ex wife? 

I have a 20 year old and would not be happy with her hooking up with a 30 year old Thai guy, yet alone a 70 year old. 

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16 hours ago, kennypowers said:

I would imagine it would come as a real shock to any kid to find out their father was the stereotypical creepy guy with a young Asian GF who is only with him because he can provide financial security. It's embarrassing .

 

Young women do not find old men attractive. Your kids know this, so when they see this dynamic playing out it's hard to get used to the idea that your dad is with someone because of convenience; that is: she gets money/her kids/family taken care of, and he gets to slobber over a young woman's body every night (or day). It isn't pleasant to realize that that's who your father is. It's shallow, and hard to come to terms with. 

 

Up until that point, your kid(s) probably had this idea that, considering the values their dad taught them growing up, he would date/marry someone he could relate to, someone who grew up in the same era and likes the same music, art, hobbies. Someone on a similar intellectual level when it comes to politics, philosophy, etc. 

 

It would also be hard for your children to relate to that woman, to know she is only really there for the handouts, that she doesn't really love your father or find him remotely attractive. Moreover, she couldn't care less for his intelligence and life achievements. Try looking at it from the perspective of your children, rather than your selfish "f*** everyone" point of view. 

 

It's all well and god saying, "They have to lump it. It's my life, etc". But if one has children, one should always consider how one's actions make them feel and how they impact the father-child relationship. My relationship with my kids will always come before any woman. What my kids think of me matters. No matter what age I am, I am their role model. 

 

Great post. It's obvious who the creepy ones are here. 

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15 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

Very well said.

 

Unfortunately, there are some people, even in this very thread, who feel the need to mock and deride people who have these types of relationships.  I think what these people forget, is that if they were truly happy, if they were so far above these "poor desperate men", why are they wasting their time insulting them?  It says more about them that it does about some men who have found happiness in their very brief stay on this Earth.

Spot on. Live and let live fosters peace of mind and a sense of goodwill toward mankind. Judgment is the polar opposite of goodwill, and is usually indicative of a very, very dark heart. 

 

Let them be. By allowing themselves to live a life like that, they are unconsciously creating their own hell on earth, while we enjoy a life made of dreams. 

Edited by spidermike007
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