Foreigner Questions Thai Dowry: Netizens Respond

[PingRoundTheWorld]

Doubly-stuid. First of all for marrying a 47yo - what is the point? she can't have children, there are much better (and cheaper) sex options - why get married to begin with???

 

And yes- paying a dowry is stupid. You are not Thai. You are going to provide her a much better life than she'd get otherwise - she should and would say thank you and shut up without a dowry. And if she demanded it? boot her out and find someone who isn't a gold digger.

[Thechook]

Dowry for a 47 yr old grandmother?  I don't think so 

[Thechook]

Dowry for a 47 yr old grandmother?  I don't think so 

[TroubleandGrumpy]

14 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

One thing I do know is that many judges will go beyond the law and give women things they don't deserve, and get away with it. They are usually biased towards women and a man has to fight just to get treated fair. Something which is changing slowly. More and more men are wanting a relationship than before, and the women aren't getting away with screwing men over as much anymore. My ex tried to get my house, and she did get primary custody of the kids, at least for awhile. I bought the house a week before we were married, in my name, so she didn't have a prayer.

Yes they do and in Aust it is systemic.  There is a lot of men now 'going their own way' these days - and there are many 'Passport Bros' like me that left the west and went overseas for fun and maybe to find a girl that cannot financially rape me and take all the money I have earned in my life. The growing trend now in the west is for young men to avoid long term commitment and relationships with women in the west - because of the financial downsides.  Check out MGTOW - despite what Wikipedia and other feminist organisations and people say (Men Going Their Own Way is an anti-feminist, misogynistic, etc etc etc bla bla bla), it is real and it is a growing movement - I wish I had known about it all over 30 years ago. 

[jaywalker2]

Sorry, I don't see much future for this marriage. If he gave in to her squeezing him in the beginning, she's going to keep doing it. It's inevitable.

[BangkokReady]

21 hours ago, DLock said:

I must concur with OMF - what possible benefits does getting married provide, over having a long-term girlfriend have for a man?

 

Traditionally, it was all about sex, then being able to live together and have children, but as that is no longer necessary, it does seem to be losing its attraction for men.  All that is left is a little bit of social pressure, so if men aren't bothered by that...

 

As they say, why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?  "Feminists" have really made things bad for women, ironically.

[smew]

Pay nothing, it seems whenever a Thai want money they say it’s culture and you must live up to it if you want to live here. Or this is fake made up topic to create interest. 

[NicoBKK]

Not a big deal, I know several colleagues (Thai) which did pay millions in dowries for marrying well educated (University bachelor + Doc/Post Doc abroad) GFs.

[john donson]

dowry for a grandmother age woman???

[Sig]

16 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

Living here for over 25 years and not knowing any players, abusers or worse is impossible.

You are wrong, as I believe you are also wrong in making such denigrating generalizations about all Thai men.
Like I said before, "Perhaps it shows the circles you run in?"  I am careful about who I choose to associate with. And I don't spend time in settings these sorts tend to be attracted to. You might want to do better in that area yourself. You just possibly may find life more enjoyable and see another part of society that you apparently don't even know exists. But that's up to you, of course. Personally, I'm happy to not associate with low-lifes. To each his own....

[fredwiggy]

19 minutes ago, Sig said:

You are wrong, as I believe you are also wrong in making such denigrating generalizations about all Thai men.
Like I said before, "Perhaps it shows the circles you run in?"  I am careful about who I choose to associate with. And I don't spend time in settings these sorts tend to be attracted to. You might want to do better in that area yourself. You just possibly may find life more enjoyable and see another part of society that you apparently don't even know exists. But that's up to you, of course. Personally, I'm happy to not associate with low-lifes. To each his own....

I'm not wrong, unless you don't have a TV, internet, or people you understand. All you have to do is look at any and all forums on Thailand. Talk to any and all women here. My circles are actually some farang friends, who have wives, who all agree on this. This includes quite a few men and women Thais in the states who were born here. All professionals, happy with their wives, and have lived here for years, along with my girlfriend, who works for a tesaban, who was married to a Thai who treated her badly. Who has many Thai women friends, who say the same things.

 

Some, like I said, have good decent husbands, who don't cheat or abuse (that they've said), and they have also mentioned how bad the locals are here. These are Thais talking. I have heard stories from my GF for over 3 years on the men she works with and around. Half are cheaters, the other half she thinks are somewhat okay, but she only sees from the outside.

 

People here gossip, and much of it it about their men. If you haven't heard this, you are not listening. Point is, I go by what I see, and hear, and have heard for many years. I don't denigrate all local men, as that would be wrong. Just like men from every country, where up to 70% cheat, many abuse and many more neglect their women. It's the same here, but more, as in a few other countries that look at women as inferior, African and Middle eastern come to mind, plus others. 

 

I have friends in a few different countries, and hundreds in the states. All good, decent, non prejudiced people like myself, who are realists. We aren't blind. I have friends from all walks of life, from very well off to poor, and everything in between. Women and men. I for one do not associate with people who are haters, narcissists, men who treat women bad, women who do the same to men, or those who rape the earth for profit, among other lowlifes.

 

It always pays to read a person's whole post, so as not to nitpick some of it, leaving out the gist of all of it.

Edited April 4 by fredwiggy

[jimgilly]

One word Idiot

[PingRoundTheWorld]

3 hours ago, TroubleandGrumpy said:

despite what Wikipedia and other feminist organisations and people say (Men Going Their Own Way is an anti-feminist, misogynistic, etc etc etc bla bla bla), it is real and it is a growing movement

Of course they'll say that. It interferes with them being able to control, manipulate, and financially rape men. Anything that even remotely threatens their monopoly on sex is vilified.

 

Funny though- in Thailand they reach for your pocket before marriage, back home they'll take your pants and shirt too after.

 

Don't think I'll ever remarry. What's the benefit to me? I can have all the sex I want at a fraction of the cost, and if I want emotional connection a gf will do just fine.

[Sig]

3 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I'm not wrong, unless you don't have a TV, internet, or people you understand. All you have to do is look at any and all forums on Thailand. Talk to any and all women here. My circles are actually some farang friends, who have wives, who all agree on this. This includes quite a few men and women Thais in the states who were born here. All professionals, happy with their wives, and have lived here for years, along with my girlfriend, who works for a tesaban, who was married to a Thai who treated her badly. Who has many Thai women friends, who say the same things.

 

Some, like I said, have good decent husbands, who don't cheat or abuse (that they've said), and they have also mentioned how bad the locals are here. These are Thais talking. I have heard stories from my GF for over 3 years on the men she works with and around. Half are cheaters, the other half she thinks are somewhat okay, but she only sees from the outside.

 

People here gossip, and much of it it about their men. If you haven't heard this, you are not listening. Point is, I go by what I see, and hear, and have heard for many years. I don't denigrate all local men, as that would be wrong. Just like men from every country, where up to 70% cheat, many abuse and many more neglect their women. It's the same here, but more, as in a few other countries that look at women as inferior, African and Middle eastern come to mind, plus others. 

 

I have friends in a few different countries, and hundreds in the states. All good, decent, non prejudiced people like myself, who are realists. We aren't blind. I have friends from all walks of life, from very well off to poor, and everything in between. Women and men. I for one do not associate with people who are haters, narcissists, men who treat women bad, women who do the same to men, or those who rape the earth for profit, among other lowlifes.

 

It always pays to read a person's whole post, so as not to nitpick some of it, leaving out the gist of all of it.

You are wrong, plain and simple. Assuming you can judge what goes on in another's life by personal anecdotal testimony is a severely flawed way of going about life. Apparently you think very highly of yourself to be able to make judgements about someone you don't know at all.
It is very clear that we associate with very different kinds of people.
What makes you assume I haven't heard gossip? You can believe all the gossip and partake in all the gossip you like. It normally does nothing but lead to harmful ideas and poor understanding of myriad complexities that are beyond the grasp of such idle talk.
You seem to assume that I am unaware that there are people who live unwholesome lives. I never said such a thing. I said that I don't associate with those kind of people and I have had none of those kind of people in my circle. I'm thankful for that. For you to say that is impossible is an absurdity. It is a distraction to have associations like that in one's life and I don't need it. If you think it is impossible to live life like that, you would benefit in taking a look around yourself and rethinking your lifestyle and relationships. But, if you enjoy keeping your low view of Thai men and continue in that society, be my guest. It's all yours. But you are wrong in your assessment, judging that Thai men are such lowlife creeps. That is an arrogant, not to mention ignorant, generalization that doesn't hold water. You may want to qualify such excessively broad statements when belittling half the population of a country, which I see you've now started to do, after I called you out on it. Originally you posted Thai men as generally being creeps, as you said, "Thai men don't laugh. They just don't marry a woman that's been around. Usually. They'd rather keep on using them and leaving when kids are born. We laugh at what sad "men" they are, running from responsibility." Now you say that you "don't denigrate all local men". Well, that's good. But you sure did denigrate them in your earlier post, which was my main point to begin with.

[fredwiggy]

35 minutes ago, Sig said:

You are wrong, plain and simple. Assuming you can judge what goes on in another's life by personal anecdotal testimony is a severely flawed way of going about life. Apparently you think very highly of yourself to be able to make judgements about someone you don't know at all.
It is very clear that we associate with very different kinds of people.
What makes you assume I haven't heard gossip? You can believe all the gossip and partake in all the gossip you like. It normally does nothing but lead to harmful ideas and poor understanding of myriad complexities that are beyond the grasp of such idle talk.
You seem to assume that I am unaware that there are people who live unwholesome lives. I never said such a thing. I said that I don't associate with those kind of people and I have had none of those kind of people in my circle. I'm thankful for that. For you to say that is impossible is an absurdity. It is a distraction to have associations like that in one's life and I don't need it. If you think it is impossible to live life like that, you would benefit in taking a look around yourself and rethinking your lifestyle and relationships. But, if you enjoy keeping your low view of Thai men and continue in that society, be my guest. It's all yours. But you are wrong in your assessment, judging that Thai men are such lowlife creeps. That is an arrogant, not to mention ignorant, generalization that doesn't hold water. You may want to qualify such excessively broad statements when belittling half the population of a country, which I see you've now started to do, after I called you out on it. Originally you posted Thai men as generally being creeps, as you said, "Thai men don't laugh. They just don't marry a woman that's been around. Usually. They'd rather keep on using them and leaving when kids are born. We laugh at what sad "men" they are, running from responsibility." Now you say that you "don't denigrate all local men". Well, that's good. But you sure did denigrate them in your earlier post, which was my main point to begin with.

Ok, you've never ran into or heard of any local men who abuse, cheat on or leave their women here after childbirth., besides gossip I'm guessing? I don't assume, I just watch a lot of TV, news worldwide, read a few forums, listen attentively to everyone, remember what they say, and have a lot of people,like I mentioned a few times, that have told me, for many years before I moved here, and then I found out firsthand, how it is here. Granted, some people live in a small village and don't know what goes on outside of that paradise, or don't have anyone who tells them what happened to their or others they know lives. 

 

You said you heard gossip. You do know some gossip is true and some is just complaining to be heard. That means you probably did hear that men here have been bad to someone, but I guess chose to not believe it because its hearsay.

 

Again, you assume I say this about all Thai men. I didn't. Just like men from all countries, most are bad in some ways regarding women and children. This isn't hearsay. I, and everyone I know has experienced this. And again, I don't associate with those types because toxic people bring you down.

 

This is something I've been teaching my GF here, not to listen to those that think you are no good, that men are superior to women, that people in power are good, that the rich are good. She sees I'm much different than any men she's been associated with, and tells me so. She tells me everything about her past life, how she was treated by her dad, husband and a few farangs here. Also tells me how men she works with are, and others she knows. These aren't people we associate with besides tesaban government things, because it's her work, so she has to go, and I sometimes go also.

 

I'm sorry you misunderstood me when I said anything about locals. I didn't mean all. Just as it is about all men in general. I've listened to women complain all my life what their men have done, and I don't believe all of it, because sometimes it takes two. When I said Thai men don't marry a woman that's been around, meaning married before, bar girl, had a kid or three, that's mostly true. Thai women themselves in both countries have told me the same thing. They're considered tainted. I know of only one that married another Thai, and she knew him all her life, as it's my ex's cousin (the woman).

 

I know many people denigrate the locals, as I hear it daily, both here and in person, and I've heard it for many years, and after seeing it here, and hearing others for the last 30 years say the same things, including the Thais themselves, you see there's a lot of truth in it. There are Thai men who are good family men. I've seen a few, and heard of more.Their  reputation has always been there for as long as I can remember, and with Buddhism being how it is, I don't see it changing, along with how the courts turn a blind eye to giving them responsibility after a kid is born. This is a fact and can't be disputed. Look around and see how many single moms are here, how many also leave their kids to work and leave them with grandma (over 35%, highest worldwide), because they have no other support system besides their parents . There's a reason for this.

 

I'm neither arrogant or ignorant but a realist that researches, reads daily all my life, and listens. And you don't have to associate with certain people to know they exist. Look at he worlds problems and understand most of them are from the breakdown of the family, mostly due to absent fathers.

Edited April 4 by fredwiggy

[gomangosteen]

12 hours ago, Thechook said:

Dowry for a 47 yr old grandmother?  I don't think so 

How many times ... this has been noted numerous times she was not a grandmother it was an error in translation in the first post,  and the original story has been provided on this thread, she had two nieces and one nephew.

 

Not a grandmother.

 

But apart from that, it was a fictitious / hoax Reddit post ... hardly a credible new source.

 

The poster's account was deleted and Reddit closed the thread two weeks ago.

 

Yet here it lives on.

 

And on 

[TroubleandGrumpy]

9 hours ago, PingRoundTheWorld said:

Of course they'll say that. It interferes with them being able to control, manipulate, and financially rape men. Anything that even remotely threatens their monopoly on sex is vilified.

 

Funny though- in Thailand they reach for your pocket before marriage, back home they'll take your pants and shirt too after.

 

Don't think I'll ever remarry. What's the benefit to me? I can have all the sex I want at a fraction of the cost, and if I want emotional connection a gf will do just fine.

Well said, and yes in Thailand they make it clear up front that they exect to be 'financially rewarded' and they dont think the sun shines out of their rear end (and front) and a man must reward them with most/all their wealth if they decide to leave.

 

Maybe you will find a good Thai girl and 'settle down' one day - there is many advantages to being in a good relationship for a bloke - and here in Thailand you can just walk away if it turns out later to not be so good (just dont ever get her prgnant - get a vasectomy). 

[BTB1977]

Grandmother's are getting Sin Sod now?? Now I've heard everything.  As for being stupid, that is beyond stupid. Better learn to say no real fast. And if the threatens to leave , help pack her bags. 

[Sig]

14 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

Again, you assume I say this about all Thai men. I didn't.

I did not assume that at all. You did say that. I literally quoted you in my last reply. Here again - "Thai men don't laugh. They just don't marry a woman that's been around. Usually. They'd rather keep on using them and leaving when kids are born. We laugh at what sad "men" they are, running from responsibility." As I mentioned before, it is a horrible generalization that would be better to be attended with a qualification if you didn't intend to mean all Thai men. Personally, I very highly doubt it would even apply to most Thai men.

14 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I'm sorry you misunderstood me when I said anything about locals. I didn't mean all.

Good that you have qualified that. It would have been good to do that from the beginning. As I mentioned before, that was the original point I was making, before you went to a tangent making your absurd assumption that it is impossible for me to not have had any of those sorts of people in my circle here over the past 25 years.

14 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

And you don't have to associate with certain people to know they exist.

I never said that I don't know they exist. That was never my point. That somehow became something that you read between the lines. One would have to be living in a cave with no interaction with society since one was a child to not know there are lowlife men in society.

[fredwiggy]

3 minutes ago, Sig said:

I did not assume that at all. You did say that. I literally quoted you in my last reply. Here again - "Thai men don't laugh. They just don't marry a woman that's been around. Usually. They'd rather keep on using them and leaving when kids are born. We laugh at what sad "men" they are, running from responsibility." As I mentioned before, it is a horrible generalization that would be better to be attended with a qualification if you didn't intend to mean all Thai men. Personally, I very highly doubt it would even apply to most Thai men.

Good that you have qualified that. It would have been good to do that from the beginning. As I mentioned before, that was the original point I was making, before you went to a tangent making your absurd assumption that it is impossible for me to not have had any of those sorts of people in my circle here over the past 25 years.

I never said that I don't know they exist. That was never my point. That somehow became something that you read between the lines. One would have to be living in a cave with no interaction with society since one was a child to not know there are lowlife men in society.

It actually does apply to most men, in all countries, but again, I didn't say all men. It happens more here than most other countries because of the lack of enforcement of child support here. Men who think they can make babies all over and not pay for them lets them believe they can bed as many as they want and not pay the piper. Not just here but here, like I said, more children are raised by grandparents than any other country worldwide, and there's a good reason for that that I mentioned.

 

You had said you lived here over 25 years and didn't see things like I mentioned. That to me was impossible because of course you see this happening. It's just that you don't associate with those types. neither do I, so our communication went sideways. No problem.

[tonypattaya]

Giving the wife's family is all part of the Thai culture, as it is in many parts of the world. However in India it is the reverse the bride's family has to pay a dowry to the groom, which it is why, sadly, some families kill their daughters at birth.
The amount you pay is relative to the amount that the daughter is financially worth to the family. If it was, for example, a famous actress, then the dowry would be millions of baht. 

Quite often the family will ask for a lot more than they expect to receive and will agree to give you the excess back. They need to show off to their relatives and friends that their daughter was considered to be more valuable.
You say that you never saw any of the money; well it was NOT a loan, it was a payment to the parents, for them to do whatever they like with it.

If you dislike the Thai culture, then better you find a Western wife but, be warned, it will cost you a lot more in the long run. lol.

[MangoKorat]

On 4/3/2024 at 11:19 AM, gomangosteen said:

Or a reading lesson.

As has been pointed out many times, error in first post corrected several times, she has two nieces and one nephew.

She is not a mother or grandmother.

Grandma or no grandma she's old enough to be one and that's the point so what's yours?

 

I don't always read 6 pages of posts before commenting.

[Sig]

8 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

You had said you lived here over 25 years and didn't see things like I mentioned. That to me was impossible because of course you see this happening. It's just that you don't associate with those types. neither do I, so our communication went sideways. No problem.

I agree, no problem.
But, let me refresh your memory (below). I didn't say that I "didn't see things like (you) mentioned" in my 25+ years here, I said that "I've never known" those types. You acknowledged understanding what I said at one point (below) and asserting that it was "impossible". But you seemed intent on continuing in a tangent that was disparate from my original point and insisting that it is "impossible" for me to not know these sorts of lowlifes. I don't and I haven't and that's why I kept saying you are wrong. I couldn't really care less about all of the other tangential things you brought into the mix. If you know so many of these types, up to you, to each his own. We must run in VERY different circles, and I have no desire to spend 1 minute of my social life among the types of which you apparently know so many.

 

On 4/3/2024 at 3:52 AM, fredwiggy said:

I'm guessing you don't realize that man of us "dumb" foreigners are here on this site, and I'm also guessing from your type of reply, we are all smarter than you are.Thai men won't pay a sin sod because most of the time they won't marry a woman who's had children and or has been married already. It's not about a requirement because it's always something that is negotiated. Many of us pay because we are okay with it and can afford it, and some times we will get it back anyway. Thai men don't laugh. They just don't marry a woman that's been around. Usually. They'd rather keep on using them and leaving when kids are born. We laugh at what sad "men" they are, running from responsibility. It's usually the ones who call others dumb that shirk responsibility and are hiding a warped personality.

You're right, Thai men don't necessarily laugh when they hear stories like this. Over the years I've talked with some of my friends about these kind of stories. They never laughed, nor did the women with whom I shared these kinds of stories. They shook their heads in disgust at the Thai families that behaved this way. They didn't have disdain for the farang, so they wouldn't laugh at him.

Since you show an apparent disdain for Thai men, it's understandable why you'd hold the opinion you expressed about them here. It is on the same level to be head-shaking in disgust about. Of course, I've heard those stories of irresponsible men who do as you mentioned (in my home country too), but I've never known one in over 25 years here and know many men who are very respectable and are great husbands and fathers.

Perhaps it shows the circles you run in? I don't know... but it sure is sad that you hold such a low view of Thai men and make such broad generalizations denigrating them.

On 4/3/2024 at 4:23 AM, fredwiggy said:

Living here for over 25 years and not knowing any players, abusers or worse is impossible.

[fredwiggy]

On 4/5/2024 at 5:06 PM, Sig said:

I agree, no problem.
But, let me refresh your memory (below). I didn't say that I "didn't see things like (you) mentioned" in my 25+ years here, I said that "I've never known" those types. You acknowledged understanding what I said at one point (below) and asserting that it was "impossible". But you seemed intent on continuing in a tangent that was disparate from my original point and insisting that it is "impossible" for me to not know these sorts of lowlifes. I don't and I haven't and that's why I kept saying you are wrong. I couldn't really care less about all of the other tangential things you brought into the mix. If you know so many of these types, up to you, to each his own. We must run in VERY different circles, and I have no desire to spend 1 minute of my social life among the types of which you apparently know so many.

 

You're right, Thai men don't necessarily laugh when they hear stories like this. Over the years I've talked with some of my friends about these kind of stories. They never laughed, nor did the women with whom I shared these kinds of stories. They shook their heads in disgust at the Thai families that behaved this way. They didn't have disdain for the farang, so they wouldn't laugh at him.

Since you show an apparent disdain for Thai men, it's understandable why you'd hold the opinion you expressed about them here. It is on the same level to be head-shaking in disgust about. Of course, I've heard those stories of irresponsible men who do as you mentioned (in my home country too), but I've never known one in over 25 years here and know many men who are very respectable and are great husbands and fathers.

Perhaps it shows the circles you run in? I don't know... but it sure is sad that you hold such a low view of Thai men and make such broad generalizations denigrating them.

Again, i say it's impossible for you, or anyone else alive here, to not know "about", to clarify what I meant all along, any irresponsible local men. I hang, and have always hanged out with, like I said, good people, no narcissists, people who denigrate women, treat them badly and hurt children. Basically toxic people. 

 

I've known thousands of people in my life from all over the places I've been, and I've personally seen, as has anyone else who leaves the house, men who act irresponsibly around women and children. No one I asked about this says different. Everyone I know has known men that are bad to women and children. This doesn't mean they are our friends or in our social circles. This means we see what they do, or others have told us the same. People we trust not to exaggerate greatly.

 

I know many people aren't social and many rarely leave the house, listen or watch the news, have any friends, so that would explain someone who hasn't seen or heard about men who act badly. Many years before I even thought about moving here I knew how they act. Thais have told me, others who visited or lived here told me, and still do. A man a year ahead of me in high school used to live here, and after we re connected on FB, we talked about life here, and it's exactly like I mention. After I moved here, I saw this for myself.

 

Again, I don't show a disdain for Thai men. I show disdain for bad men who act like I said. Certain nationalities are worse around children and women, and I mentioned these earlier. This is so, and not my opinion.

 

I lived next to San Antonio for 32 years, and knew (know) many Mexicans. I know personally a few that are very good to their families, and I also know quite a few that I've seen treat women and kids harsh. This I heard about before I moved there, and I saw for myself afterwards. This again doesn't mean all but a majority.

 

Most everyone knows about how certain Middle Eastern countries treat and look at their women. This again is truth. In those countries, I'm sure there are men that are good to their women but a culture raises you a certain way, and like here, where Buddhism looks at women as inferior, it is in their thinking, and will only change when other cultures are mixed for many years.

 

I ask you again, you do not know any men here that are harsh to their women and children? Only those that are good? You've only heard stories? Then okay, you aren't associated with anywhere near the amount of people I am, because in all of my life, around and in many big and smaller cities and the country, I have friends and family who aren't the greatest dads or husbands, and everyone alive can say this, unless they are anti social and never leave the house. I have run across, known, and heard about many who are as I say, and none were my friends nor in my circles.  Friends of friends, friends of family, co workers of same etc etc.  Seeing that the average person associates with around 80,000 people in their lifetime, it's hard to think you only have heard about some of these., and none personally or through close family and friends.

Edited April 7 by fredwiggy

[wealthychef]

A dowry is not paid by the groom, it is paid TO the groom by the bride's family, as a thank you for taking the burden of the woman from her family.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry 

[Sig]

 

20 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I don't show a disdain for Thai men.

Interesting claim, in light of what you said a few days ago....

On 4/5/2024 at 3:06 AM, Sig said:

Thai men don't laugh. They just don't marry a woman that's been around. Usually. They'd rather keep on using them and leaving when kids are born. We laugh at what sad "men" they are, running from responsibility.

That's quite the non-show of disdain for Thai men. I guess you said that with no disdain🤥, but with a laugh of respect?🤔🙄
If you meant to say "some Thai men" or even "many Thai men", ok fine. Say something to the effect of, "I made a poor caricature of Thai men, what I meant to say was..." Then be done. No need to write a book.
 

 

20 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I ask you again, you do not know any men here that are harsh to their women and children? Only those that are good? You've only heard stories?

 No need to ask again, as I've already spoken on this more than once. You make massive assumptions, draw erroneous conclusions from them, and don't believe me anyway. Too caught up in your own paradigm to fathom that something else can exist.

I'm done...🥴 

[fredwiggy]

28 minutes ago, Sig said:

 

Interesting claim, in light of what you said a few days ago....

That's quite the non-show of disdain for Thai men. I guess you said that with no disdain🤥, but with a laugh of respect?🤔🙄
If you meant to say "some Thai men" or even "many Thai men", ok fine. Say something to the effect of, "I made a poor caricature of Thai men, what I meant to say was..." Then be done. No need to write a book.
 

 

 No need to ask again, as I've already spoken on this more than once. You make massive assumptions, draw erroneous conclusions from them, and don't believe me anyway. Too caught up in your own paradigm to fathom that something else can exist.

I'm done...🥴 

Never said all. Majority of men aren't good to their women, and a lot of the times, children. Worldwide. Family breakdown is root cause of world problems. I don't assume, as no one knows what goes on in other's homes if you're not there 100% of the time. I've read over 65 books and countless articles from many of the main psychologists, psychiatrists and counselors, Aaron Beck, Gary Smalley, Dr. Dobson, John Gray, Dr. Laura etc etc etc, people who have interviewed hundreds of thousands of couples in their practices, then wrote books on the subjects of marriage, relationships, depression, narcissism, how men and women relate etc. This is where , along with personal experience and listening to others, that I get my information from.

 

I know how they are here and a country that allows men to get away with making babies and not paying for them much of the time is a country that's failing it's families and women. I know exactly what exists, but I think you have a blind eye to what happens around you. You think all of the men around you are good. Statistics say different. Many women hide what goes on in their homes so not to lose face. Your next door neighbor can be a serial killer, child molester or wife beater and you'd never know. They all have neighbors that think otherwise. It's true the majority of people around you might be okay, but what's okay?

 

5-6 out of 10 men cheat, maybe 3 out of 10 abuse, 5 out of 10 neglect their families in some way. That doesn't add up to what you say is around you. They don't have to be evil incarnate to be bad.Again, I have no disdain for anyone besides those that hurt women and children intentionally. You'd be surprised how many that is.

Edited April 7 by fredwiggy

[thaibeachlovers]

On 4/3/2024 at 12:02 PM, itsari said:

His wife has grandchildren and the man has paid a dowry?

I understand that there is no obligation for a dowry when a woman has a previous relationship with children.

I am sure you would not see any Thai males lining up to do the same.

There is no requirement for a dowry at all. It's traditional, not legal.

 

If farangs want to pay a dowry, up to them, but if told that he has to because it's Thai custom he should ask if they will abide by his country's custom of the wife's family paying for the wedding ceremony.

 

Too many dumb farangs have paid out and now the Thais think all farangs are dumb!

[Skipalongcassidy]

4 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

  Majority of men aren't good to their women, 

Bullpucky... Just cite one source out of all the crap that you claim to have read or retract that statement... you need help.

[fredwiggy]

3 minutes ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

Bullpucky... Just cite one source out of all the crap that you claim to have read or retract that statement... you need help.

I just did. There are hundreds. It isn't I that needs help but those that are the ones who treat women and children bad. Look around and see what's going on in the world. It starts at home. Fact. Try reading one book on relationships, marriage, cognitive thinking or any others and you'll open your eyes to how people think.