Could do with some support and advice here ?

[Will B Good]

Sad to say....but get out now.......you have your own life to live.

 

It is difficult finding happiness at the best of times.....go and try to find it somewhere else and with someone else.

[J Branche]

Definitely agree once it gets to the anything you say escalates level it is time to go for a walk and talk later.  When your in that irrational state of mind you can't expect many rational thoughts.

[ignore it]

Hmm.

 

Consider this.

 

It ain't ever going to get better.

 

 

[jdlancaster]

She’s bored. 

[thesetat2013]

Wow did you pick the worst place ever to ask this. 

[SOTIRIOS]

Well, No Love, No Respect, Wouldn't You Say (?)

It Suggests Infidelity At The Very Least

(Although You Don't Reveal How Much Time You Spend Together/Apart)

Nor Do You Reveal How Much Money This Has Already Cost You

We Often Imagine/Delude Ourselves With 'A Relationship'

In Actuality, It's A Situation With 2 Incompatible People

The Other Party Biding Her Time To Get What She Wants From You 

(And It Is Not You)

Sorry Buddy, Gotta' Tell It Like It Is

You're Not The First, Won't Be The Last

[khunPer]

On 10/7/2024 at 9:00 AM, The Cobra said:

...The reasons I haven’t walked away yet are mainly because I worry about what might happen to her if I leave,...

I've had friends saying the same, but my girlfriend always tells me that they shouldn't worry, a Thai lady can always find a solution. Seems like she is correct, because a number of her friends have split with their farang husband or boyfriend, and managed well.

 

So, I think you shall not worry too much about that, you shall rather think about your own future in Thailand, and especially as you mention yourself, about when getting older.

 

On 10/7/2024 at 9:00 AM, The Cobra said:

...My biggest worry is how things will be in the future, especially as I get older or if something happens to me...

Having a younger spouse can be a benefit, as long as it works well, but...

 

An elder fellow countryman began to become demented, resulting in that his younger wife threw him out; however, kindly supported him with a one way ticket back home. Despite he had paid for building a home – hers – now, he stood with his luggage somewhere up in Isaan, and a grown up daughter in his home-country, who was pleading in forums for someone to help him, to find his way down to Bangkok Airport. Luckily someone knew a taxi-service, and they would pick him up and make sure he got checked in and entered the departure area, being assisted for help to the gate.

 

Yes, it's worth thinking about, what might happen when we become grumpy old men – or even worse – how shall we manage to live in Thailand...

[BusyB]

On 10/7/2024 at 9:00 AM, The Cobra said:

she doesn’t seem capable of considering anyone’s needs or feelings

 

You've obviously invested a lot of commitment here, and I hear where you're coming from. But it strikes me you need to focus on two questions amongst all the rest of the clutter and excuse making:

 

Is that how you want to live for the rest of your life?

 

Is that the kind of partner you wish for in old age?

 

On 10/7/2024 at 9:00 AM, The Cobra said:

I worry about what might happen to her if I leave,

 

You are not responsible for how she lives after you leave because the relationship has become untenable for you or you have outgrown it. It is her responsibility. She is a grown woman.

 

Anyway, she'll be OK. By staying past time you are preventing her from having experiences which will help her mature and perhaps be a lot happier in the long term.

 

Edited 1 hour ago by BusyB

[AustinRacing]

Based on the little information provided, the op does not mention his shortcomings and seems to attribute all issues to her shortcomings. It also seems that she is in it for the convenience/dependence. She’s waiting for something better to come along and trade up. This is a too common scenario with older farangs dating younger Thais thinking they’re doing a good thing taking care of a woman, helping out etc. But they fail to recognize their own flaws. It’s rare for a relationship with 20 year age gap to be based on genuine and mutual affection to one and other. 

[xtrnuno41]

They say women are from Venus, men from Mars.

You are not gay, as gays can handle women way more easier, at least it seems.

It doesnt matter where the woman is from, as any woman can act like this. There might be differences.

Been in relations with women of several countries. And ALL had their issues.

First I thought, it was me, but hearing other guys stories, I noticed it isnt me.

  

I recognize things, as im in a relation for 8 years now with Thai woman.

Sometimes out of the blue, she brings up things and then I better say "Wooooooosha" 

Im older now and so try to stay calm. They say, you should talk, however I think , it is one ear in other ear out.

It makes hardly no sense. 

I give you  a stupid example

Was once driving with her and she was busy doing a transaction on phone.

I had to do a manoeuvre to avoid an accident. She exploded. Screamed and angry.

I put the car on the side of the road and asked her what was more important, a good transaction or an accident.

No answer, still angry for long time. Woooosha. 

Women and longer time, can also be very short, come up with, starting fights for nothing and no matter what you talk, they go on. Wooooooooosha !

 

With another woman, my ex wife. I love longhair with a woman, the longer the nicer, I think.

SO what my wife did, went to hairdresser and changed it to a short cut. She knew, I loved longhair.

Surprise she said when I came home from work, you like the short cut? And honestly I said "NO".

DInggg, wrong answer and an angry woman for some time.

 

You want to change to another woman? Give it some time and you ll have the same.

It is a miracle to find utopia with a woman and I guess impossible, just balance, Woooooosha.