3 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

I'm not paying a "salary". And in fact giving an allowance doesn't complicate the matter much except possibly to the extent that she wants more money, but that's unlikely as she's working for 300 baht a day in a cafe now.

The only thing that complicated the matter was my talking to other girls. I am 100% sure that this in fact played the greatest role in her deciding to leave to see her mother for her birthday. A girl that loves you and wants to be with you doesn't leave for her mother's birthday. She lost interest because of me writing to other girls. So I complicated it. Not the allowance.

We are not in a loving and trusting relationship because I broke that trust by writing to other girls. Had I not done that, she would still be here. Nothing to do with age-gap.

Lol, she's 25, she's not a child. And I'm not "coercing" anyone, certainly not with money. You do talk some nonsense.

Quite a lot actually.

Everyone is out for fun, adventure and money. More platitudes and generalisations of no use to anyone.

That is all a fantasy that you have concocted in your own mind. Thos of us that haven't had sex with her, can see a different pattern entirely. Your ego refuses to accept the more likely explanation.

You have just reinforced her belief that all men are dogs. The trust, is gone. If you want her to trust you, then you have to trust her.

Stop asking questions and stop expecting her to reassure you. You don't own her. Be happy that she meets with you at all and be nice to her. If you want to act like a dad, then do that with your own daughters.

For sure she is lying and she might have many reasons for that. But the point of a relationship is to improve the lives of each other. She obviously makes you feel good and she has family to support. So instead of making both of you miserable and stressed, change tack. Be nice and be normal. Once she can relax with you again, she might confess everything. Don't keep pushing. Make it a nice relationship again.

1 minute ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

Once she can relax with you again, she might confess everything. Don't keep pushing. Make it a nice relationship again.

Yes, that's what Prubangboy said as well.

I'm trying. But it's very hard to be nice and normal when she's not being nice and normal. And there's no certainty about anything, if she's working in a cafe, if she's in Chonburi, if she's living with an aunt etc...There's a lot of unresolved things going on.

9 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

Prubangboy has indeed met with me and Phuket Girl, and he has given some excellent advice. However, you are not privy to this advice, and it is completely different to what you suggest. He has said he does not think she is working as a bar girl, and does not believe she is having sex with another guy. He said he thinks she is testing me and no other guy is involved. That I should not go to Chonburi and just wait it out.

She is WORKING. She doesn't have money to do nothing.

1 minute ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

She is WORKING. She doesn't have money to do nothing.

She had 35,000 baht in her account. If she is working, the question is if she's working in a cafe or not.

11 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

It's actually understandable she lied about being in Sisaket when she was in Chonburi. She and I agreed that she return from Sisaket after her mother's birthday. I suggested 8th January. She then came up with this voting story on 11th. She would have known that I would not be happy that she is in Chonburi, something which we had never discussed and which she decided unilaterally without ever discussing it with me. At that point it would have been credible that she had decided to break up and start a new life in Chonburi, as she would have thought mostly about me talking to other girls, seeing the screenshots of the photos of my convos she took secretly probably every night.

So there are other explanations why she lied about being in Sisaket when she was in Chonburi, that have nothing to do with antoher guy.

This is by far the issue that gives me the most trouble. However, for this too there could be other explanations, she could be in Pattaya with her two schoolfriends partying and knows I would not approve of her doing that. So again, in the total absence of real evidence that she is with another guy, a credible conclusion is not possible.

She claims she gave me the Thai name of the cafe. However, this point needs a resolution, she has to provide the full name of this place. It could be, again, that she is not in Chonburi, and not working in a cafe, but instead partying with her two schoolfriends. Whilst this also looks bad, it need not be a guy.

I am now texting with her. I demanded to see a photo of the menu of her cafe where it says the name. She agreed to send it. Let's see.

Lol, older women are way easier.

Absolutely, but we had a rupture, due to me writing to other girls, and her seeing the convos, so she may have lost interest due to what happened, not because she's banging another dude.

You see nothing. Don't claim you have any answers. You have nothing. There is no evidence to make a credible decision. Don't pretend you have the evidence, you don't.

That she lied more than twice is enough for most of us to make a decision, unless again, you are just in it for the sex. Lying isn't understandable for any reasons like this. Older women are a lot harder. Young girls are there for the picking, especially for a liar player. They don't have the life experience with men to see through the BS near as well. That's why I asked earlier how many older women have you been with, because it isn't a guessing game.

Again, I'm older, with obviously a lot more experience with women of all ages, especially normal to abnormal ones, with children involved and a few marriages. and being a psychology reader, can see more than the average person how people think and why they do things.

Read everything all of us have said, and then you'll again see it's much the same things. You are telling us a story, and we are sitting back, unbiased with decades of experience between us, and seeing what has you blinded. You have given all the evidence most here would need to leave.

You've come across as desperate to all of us here, and that's very obvious as you're still looking for her to text and hopping on them like it means anything. She is obviously keeping you on a string, maybe hoping you'll be there if things with other men don't work out, and seeing you already have a history and have been good to her, besides the dishonesty, she thinks she can always come back to that. Like we all have said, cut your losses and find another girl, as there are many. This is Thailand, where money talks a lot more than in the west. Remember, we aren't criticizing you but seeing this from the outside. You're involved and that blinds men all the time, until they see what others have already seen. Back off and you'll see more. Chasing her is what she wants, and makes you look desperate. that's solid advice in all relationships.

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

Yes, that's what Prubangboy said as well.

I'm trying. But it's very hard to be nice and normal when she's not being nice and normal.

Because you are forcing her to confess, when she is not ready for that. She's not ready to open her heart to you. Are you completely stupid?

Change tack and be nice to her. If you try to force it, she won't like you. Just...decide to do it. Knowing that she isn't telling you the full truth. Prepare for the worst, but behave the best. You are the man, show her how to do it. Otherwise she will just rely on what she knows.

2 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

She had 35,000 baht in her account. If she is working, the question is if she's working in a cafe or not.

35,000 baht is nothing. My Thai friend has millions going through hers. That's a bit more stable. 35k and not knowing where the next monies are coming from, is virtually nothing.

She needs stability, not some idiot player. Be nice and allow her to feel that you will not punish her if she eventually tells you the truth. Create an environment where the truth is normal.

34 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

This is a specific real life situation and it needs specific real evidence to determine if another man is involved here or not. Of that there is no evidence whatsoever of any concrete kind.

55 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

So it is not clear if she has been disloyal, she may have been and probably was, but there is no real evidence to prove it yet.

I wonder... (and pls forgive me if I overread or missed it somewhere — I admit I didn't catch up on all the 184 pages).

1)

Did she ever commit to an exclusive relationship with you (no matter $$$-based or not), based on monogamy and faithfulness or loyalty?

I remember the OP and there it seemed she clearly stated she wanted to remain free, and you called it shameless.

This would mean you blame her for behaving in a way she actually announced clearly.

 

2)

Given you get the evidence she has been with other guys recently... what exactly would change? The way you describe your time with her — when she gave you her full attention — sounds like good value (for $$$ or not). Why not just take it as it is, enjoy the times together and forget about the rest?

3) 

In one of your enthusiastic texts about her you’ve mentioned her “child-bearing hips” and I couldn’t help but chuckle. Another place you call her lazy and not very educated. Do you fantasize about having kids with her? Do you realize that uneducated/lazy/kids is a bad combination?

22 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

I'm not paying a "salary". And in fact giving an allowance doesn't complicate the matter much except possibly to the extent that she wants more money, but that's unlikely as she's working for 300 baht a day in a cafe now.

The only thing that complicated the matter was my talking to other girls. I am 100% sure that this in fact played the greatest role in her deciding to leave to see her mother for her birthday. A girl that loves you and wants to be with you doesn't leave for her mother's birthday. She lost interest because of me writing to other girls. So I complicated it. Not the allowance.

We are not in a loving and trusting relationship because I broke that trust by writing to other girls. Had I not done that, she would still be here. Nothing to do with age-gap.

Lol, she's 25, she's not a child. And I'm not "coercing" anyone, certainly not with money. You do talk some nonsense.

Quite a lot actually.

Everyone is out for fun, adventure and money. More platitudes and generalisations of no use to anyone.

Everyone pays a salary or provides for their women. That's how older men can be with younger ones anywhere.

Yes, you talking to other girls, no matter what this girl is doing, created jealousy, and even the worst can be jealous.

Going to her mother's birthday is why many go back home, and voting is another, just like Songkran and New Years, especially if she and her mom are close.

She's not a child, but she is still young, which means immaturity compared to older women. That means more games, more bad choices and choices based a lot on her friends lifestyles.

If you take the money out of relationships here especially, you won't have one, especially with the younger crowd who are less independent.

Just now, mangkut70 said:

Did she ever commit to an exclusive relationship with you (no matter $$$-based or not), based on monogamy and faithfulness or loyalty?

I remember the OP and there it seemed she clearly stated she wanted to remain free, and you called it shameless.

This would mean you blame her for behaving in a way she actually announced clearly.

Whilst it true, she initially said she did not want a relationship and wanted to talk to other guys after a short time it became clear that this was in fact not what she wanted. She told me she loves me. She acted extremely jealous about other girls texting me and asked me to block them and not to do it. She talked about marrying me. She talked about a future with her and I. When I looked at her phone she had blocked her ex and did not talk to any other guys, there were only older convos.

So she wanted an exclusive monogamous and faifthful and loyal relationship. And I still don't know if she's been unfaithful or not.

3 minutes ago, mangkut70 said:

Given you get the evidence she has been with other guys recently... what exactly would change? The way you describe your time with her — when she gave you her full attention — sounds like good value (for $$$ or not). Why not just take it as it is, enjoy the times together and forget about the rest?

Of course I will, but that detail obviously affect if she's suitable for a long term position or not.

4 minutes ago, mangkut70 said:

Another place you call her lazy and not very educated. Do you fantasize about having kids with her? Do you realize that uneducated/lazy/kids is a bad combination

Her lack of education is relative, she did study a semester at uni and graudated high school. That does not concern me at all. She's very intelligent, as you can see by how she played the last 10 days. She says she is lazy herself, and I can corroborate that from having seen her the last 40 days, she loves to lounge on the couch and watch Netflix and doesn't even like to go out to restaurants, as it's too much work.

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

Everyone pays a salary or provides for their women. That's how older men can be with younger ones anywhere.

No. Just no. Hasn't occurred in ANY of my relationships. Younger or older.

Even Thai girls. They got a job. Whoever has the most money can bear more of the weight, but all my relationships were based on personality and not MONEY nor PROVIDING. That is just what the people who think that will say...of course. But there are others who have normal, balanced relationships where neither depends financially on the other, but will always help and support in all ways where necessary.

15 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

You've come across as desperate to all of us here, and that's very obvious as you're still looking for her to text

It's very normal for a guy to look at texts girls send him, it's in no way desperate. Nor am I desperate. I just want to know the truth.

16 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Chasing her is what she wants, and makes you look desperate. that's solid advice in all relationships.

Everyone always says you shouldn't chase. Male rel gurus. Female rel gurus. If nobody chases, and everyone sits back, nothing happens. Not chasing only works if you're the more attractive party. If you're not, you have to chase. In this case she's 24, gorgeous and unfortunately the more attractive party. So I have to chase.

But I'm not. I'm waiting for her to text. And then I respond. I'm not really chasing.

1 minute ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

No. Just no. Hasn't occurred in ANY of my relationships. Younger or older.

I'm sure if you were married you provided. I see providing as completely different than paying cash to keep them around. Dating is different, especially with western women, who are more independent. I'm sure one can find some here that are independent enough that you haven't a reason to pay a salary. Salary, dating or providing. Edit: Yes, a team always is the best way, both doing what they can to make it work. Traditional marriages aren't bad, where one stays home while the other works, and the one staying home does more of the house work and raising of children, no matter who it is. Both working is how most relationships work these days, with the cost of living rising each year. A team has both providing.

18 minutes ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

Because you are forcing her to confess, when she is not ready for that

I'm not forcing her to do anything. I'm politely asking her to send a photo of the menu of her cafe. There is no "forcing" or "coercion" of any kind involved. She can send it or not send it. She said she would. Let's see.

She may not be ready to confess, but the time to confess is now, as it is looking increasingly like she is up to no good.

Even if she does not confess, the truth will come out, Liars have it hard. The truth eventually always comes out. She can't really lie about here whereabouts forever.

If she does come back I will check her bank account app, and I will see if payments were made in Chonburi or not.

18 minutes ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

and allow her to feel that you will not punish her if she eventually tells you the truth.

I've repeatedly assured her that if she stops lying and just tells the truth I will just accept it and it will be fine. But she persists in lying, or rather in not providing what I ask for, I'm not really sure if she's lying now. But it sure looks that way.

19 minutes ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

Create an environment where the truth is normal.

Impossible to do when you're in an environment that is all lies, due to her not telling the truth.

2 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

It's very normal for a guy to look at texts girls send him, it's in no way desperate. Nor am I desperate. I just want to know the truth.

Everyone always says you shouldn't chase. Male rel gurus. Female rel gurus. If nobody chases, and everyone sits back, nothing happens. Not chasing only works if you're the more attractive party. If you're not, you have to chase. In this case she's 24, gorgeous and unfortunately the more attractive party. So I have to chase.

But I'm not. I'm waiting for her to text. And then I respond. I'm not really chasing.

It sounds a bit pathetic to be honest. Gurus? Really? You are in your fifties and you don't know how to behave? Which one of you is the adult in the room? You. Stop acting like an idiot and shape the relationship. You lead. Get her to like and appreciate you as a person, as her better half. Stop acting like a dad or even a lovesick puppy. Become funny again.

2 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

It's very normal for a guy to look at texts girls send him, it's in no way desperate. Nor am I desperate. I just want to know the truth.

Everyone always says you shouldn't chase. Male rel gurus. Female rel gurus. If nobody chases, and everyone sits back, nothing happens. Not chasing only works if you're the more attractive party. If you're not, you have to chase. In this case she's 24, gorgeous and unfortunately the more attractive party. So I have to chase.

But I'm not. I'm waiting for her to text. And then I respond. I'm not really chasing.

A man chases a woman at first, then it should reverse, especially if you treat them well and give them space. Attraction has nothing to do with it as that's ego speaking and they might feel they are the more attractive party, and might be it. Or not.

It's how you responded "here" when she texted you, not that you responded. Look back and see. Talking through texts, videos and messenger is what everyone does in a relationship. Not responding, not giving you a location, having you doubt where she actually is, not taking a pin or picture of where she works and telling you she doesn't want you there should be enough. Her texting back is keeping you there just in case, and if that's what you want, do it. The more you do, the less she'll do.

4 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

I'm not forcing her to do anything. I'm politely asking her to send a photo of the menu of her cafe. There is no "forcing" or "coercion" of any kind involved. She can send it or not send it. She said she would. Let's see.

She may not be ready to confess, but the time to confess is now, as it is looking increasingly like she is up to no good.

Even if she does not confess, the truth will come out, Liars have it hard. The truth eventually always comes out. She can't really lie about here whereabouts forever.

If she does come back I will check her bank account app, and I will see if payments were made in Chonburi or not.

I've repeatedly assured her that if she stops lying and just tells the truth I will just accept it and it will be fine. But she persists in lying, or rather in not providing what I ask for, I'm not really sure if she's lying now. But it sure looks that way.

Impossible to do when you're in an environment that is all lies, due to her not telling the truth.

Read your last line and again you'll have the answer. Going into a person's bank app is inappropriate. You obviously don't trust her, and vice versa. What more do you need?

Just now, fredwiggy said:

then it should reverse, especially if you treat them well and give them space.

I'm giving her space, and she is the one initiating texting. I'm only responding to her texts.

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

Attraction has nothing to do with it as that's ego speaking and they might feel they are the more attractive party, and might be it.

Yes, it has a lot to do with who should do the chasing. If you're the more attractive party you don't have to do the chasing. If you are the less attractive party you have to chase. Like in football if you're winning, you can afford to sit back. If you're losing, you have to go all out.

Just now, fredwiggy said:

You obviously don't trust her,

Of course I don't trust her. She just told me not to come to Chon Buri. What girlfriend doesn't want to see her boyfriend? This is not normal.

The name of the condo she gave is not found on Google maps.

The name of the cafe she gave is not found in Chonburi anywhere on the internet.

She has not called in 10 days. Not once. She hardly texts, very sporadically.

Plus she already lied about being in Sisaket when she was in Chonburi. She unilaterally decided to go to Chonburi.

She' s not behaving in a trustworthy way whatsoever.

2 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

I'm not forcing her to do anything. I'm politely asking her to send a photo of the menu of her cafe. There is no "forcing" or "coercion" of any kind involved. She can send it or not send it. She said she would. Let's see.

She may not be ready to confess, but the time to confess is now, as it is looking increasingly like she is up to no good.

Even if she does not confess, the truth will come out, Liars have it hard. The truth eventually always comes out. She can't really lie about here whereabouts forever.

If she does come back I will check her bank account app, and I will see if payments were made in Chonburi or not.

I've repeatedly assured her that if she stops lying and just tells the truth I will just accept it and it will be fine. But she persists in lying, or rather in not providing what I ask for, I'm not really sure if she's lying now. But it sure looks that way.

Impossible to do when you're in an environment that is all lies, due to her not telling the truth.

Forget about whether she is telling the truth. Why does it matter anyway? The reality is the reality. If she's a liar, she not suddenly going to become an angel because you say so. Enjoy what she has to offer and avoid the toxic parts. Maybe she'll modify her behaviour over time if she trusts you. But stop trying to get her to send evidence.

Get back to the relationship. Create a NICE atmosphere, even if you don't believe her. If she does the same for you, then what does the 'truth' matter? She made you happy, but you do not own her. Remember that. Protect yourself by all means. Insist on a check up, because that is reasonable. But don't make a huge drama over it. Assume your girl lives in a grey area. Doing what she needs to do, but underneath is still human.

Just now, Cameroni said:

I'm giving her space, and she is the one initiating texting. I'm only responding to her texts.

Yes, it has a lot to do with who should do the chasing. If you're the more attractive party you don't have to do the chasing. If you are the less attractive party you have to chase. Like in football if you're winning, you can afford to sit back. If you're losing, you have to go all out.

I'm not sure where you got this information but it's way off. Thinking you're the more attractive party and going from there is also wrong. Relationships are not football. That's a game where both want to win. Playing games in relationships has both losing. Backing off and giving space has the other thinking, which isn't a bad thing. It's not the same as creating jealousy, which only hurts a relationship.

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

Of course I don't trust her. She just told me not to come to Chon Buri. What girlfriend doesn't want to see her boyfriend? This is not normal.

The name of the condo she gave is not found on Google maps.

The name of the cafe she gave is not found in Chonburi anywhere on the internet.

She has not called in 10 days. Not once. She hardly texts, very sporadically.

Plus she already lied about being in Sisaket when she was in Chonburi. She unilaterally decided to go to Chonburi.

She' s not behaving in a trustworthy way whatsoever.

Because she's not your girlfriend... why doesn't this sink into your skull? Girlfriend is just a fantasy of your own creation. It is what it is, rather than what you want it to be. Work with what you actually HAVE and improve on it. Improve what you have with her. Stop pushing her to tell the truth. You won't like the truth. Instead, focus on what you like about her and she will focus on what she likes about you.

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

Of course I don't trust her. She just told me not to come to Chon Buri. What girlfriend doesn't want to see her boyfriend? This is not normal.

The name of the condo she gave is not found on Google maps.

The name of the cafe she gave is not found in Chonburi anywhere on the internet.

She has not called in 10 days. Not once. She hardly texts, very sporadically.

Plus she already lied about being in Sisaket when she was in Chonburi. She unilaterally decided to go to Chonburi.

She' s not behaving in a trustworthy way whatsoever.

Then read what you just wrote and there's your answer. Decide what you really want and deal with it. Either find a decent women by being decent or the alternative is exactly this. You really don't know where or who she's been with, and guessing will make you crazy. That's not the basis for a good relationship but problems, and I'm sure everyone here can attest to that.

1 minute ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

Forget about whether she is telling the truth. Why does it matter anyway? The reality is the reality. If she's a liar, she not suddenly going to become an angel because you say so. Enjoy what she has to offer and avoid the toxic parts. Maybe she'll modify her behaviour over time if she trusts you.

This is all true of course, but I don't see the issue with asking for some evidence about things she's said and claimed. Like she worked in X cafe. If that's the case, let me see the menu to verify it.

Of course I still want to know if she's telling the truth or not. It's a rather important detail! Only on that basis can you decide if you just enjoy her company as a f-buddy or if she's suitable for a long term position.

You can't pretend it doesn't matter.

3 minutes ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

Get back to the relationship. Create a NICE atmosphere, even if you don't believe her. If she does the same for you, then what does the 'truth' matter? She made you happy, but you do not own her.

There's a lot to be said for that, but see above. The truth matters. Only on the basis of the truth can you decide if she's just f-buddy material or can be a long term gf.

So unfortunately I really need to know the truth.

I will definitely get her to do certain tests if she comes back.

2 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

You really don't know where or who she's been with, and guessing will make you crazy. That's not the basis for a good relationship but problems, and I'm sure everyone here can attest to that.

Yes, that's true. However, if she's not been with another guy she is decent, she's just making stupid decisions that can be of little consequence. If she banged another dude, obviously that's completely different. So again, the truth matters.

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

Yes, that's true. However, if she's not been with another guy she is decent, she's just making stupid decisions that can be of little consequence. If she banged another dude, obviously that's completely different. So again, the truth matters.

You aren't in a mutual committed relationship, so she's free to do whatever she wants, as do you. If it was mutual, she would not be hiding so much. She would look forward to seeing you and be open on her whereabouts.

Just now, fredwiggy said:

You aren't in a mutual committed relationship, so she's free to do whatever she wants, as do you. If it was mutual, she would not be hiding so much. She would look forward to seeing you and be open on her whereabouts.

Well, we were in a mutual committed relationship. And that was clearly what she wanted. Unfortunately, I texted other girls, stupidly, so there was a rupture, and she left and probably decided to start a new life in Chonburi without me. Now, as happens with feelings, she reconsidered, and decided that maybe it's worth trying again, especially after working hard in a cafe for 300 baht a day. But she's obviously not convinced, her interest is low, because of what happened. Me asking for a lot of evidence and essentially calling her a liar is obviously not raising her interest.

Now, she is free to do what she wants, clearly, but what she does affects what I decide. If she banged another dude already, clearly I'm out. However, if she didn't and is just acting stupid, then whilst that's annoying, it can be forgiven and sorted out.

Whether she's hiding or not is not clear. She just agreed to send the menu, and let's see if she sends it or not.

I agree that she should look forward to seeing me, but there could be that lower interest due to my texting others. And I agree she should be open about her whereabouts, but that could be a test, she could be with girlfriends in Pattaya, there could be a lot of innocent explanations for it as well. Though obviously my main suspicion is that she's with another guy,.

22 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

40 minutes ago, FrankieGoesToHolly said:

Create an environment where the truth is normal.

Impossible to do when you're in an environment that is all lies, due to her not telling the truth.

This is the woman you want to start a relationship with? Where this whole escapade has gone is literally beyond belief. To say you are being played big time is an understatement.

2 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

Well, we were in a mutual committed relationship. And that was clearly what she wanted. Unfortunately, I texted other girls, stupidly, so there was a rupture, and she left and probably decided to start a new life in Chonburi without me. Now, as happens with feelings, she reconsidered, and decided that maybe it's worth trying again, especially after working hard in a cafe for 300 baht a day. But she's obviously not convinced, her interest is low, because of what happened. Me asking for a lot of evidence and essentially calling her a liar is obviously not raising her interest.

Now, she is free to do what she wants, clearly, but what she does affects what I decide. If she banged another dude already, clearly I'm out. However, if she didn't and is just acting stupid, then whilst that's annoying, it can be forgiven and sorted out.

Whether she's hiding or not is not clear. She just agreed to send the menu, and let's see if she sends it or not.

I agree that she should look forward to seeing me, but there could be that lower interest due to my texting others. And I agree she should be open about her whereabouts, but that could be a test, she could be with girlfriends in Pattaya, there could be a lot of innocent explanations for it as well. Though obviously my main suspicion is that she's with another guy,.

What you don't know is how she thinks or what she's done. That's why members here are telling you to either leave or deal with what you think you have. Not trusting what she says is destructive. Take it or leave it. She could have gone to Sisaket, stayed in Chonburi or is in Moscow. You have no idea so trust is all you have. Or quitting.

1 minute ago, marin said:

This is the woman you want to start a relationship with? Where this whole escapade has gone is literally beyond belief. To say you are being played big time is an understatement.

Well, I suspect she's lying. Again, all the arrows point that way and it seems the most likely explanation. However, I don't actually know if that's the case, I don't know if she had sex with another guy already or is just acting stupid.

The full facts are not known. There are a lot of alternative, innocent explanations for some of the things that are raising suspicions here, and the truth of the matter is that there is no evidence of any concrete kind that she's with another guy, or even lying.

It could all be true!

She could have registered to vote in Chon Buri! She could be working in a cafe. All these things could well be true.