Did you know that:-

Swans are the only birds with penises.

Not correct mate - many waterfowl including ducks have a penis (well the male ones do anyway).

That's the good thing about this thread. It disproves all the <deleted> you hear in the pub, after a gallon of ale

Did you know that if you took all of the remotes in the world and placed them end to end you'd have alot of pissed off people who would have to get up to change the channel?

The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache on a standard playing card!

A car uses 1.6 ounces of gas idling for one minute. Half an ounce is used to start the average automobile!

A violin contains about 70 separate pieces of wood!

It takes glass one million years to decompose, which means it never wears out and can be recycled an infinite amount of times!

A group of geese on the ground is a gaggle, a group of geese in the air is a skein!

The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is "uncopyrightable"!

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds!

It's illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while you're sitting on a curb in St. Louis!

Does it matter what size bucket?

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds!

Unless it is at an Black Sabbath concert in which case the chicken lasted about 20 seconds before being torn to pieces. Ozzie tossed a chicken into the crowd assuming they can fly - "well itz a bird izzen it?" The crowd at the front of the stage killed it and Ozzie was charged with animal cruelty. At least he didn't have to get rabies shots unlike the time he bit the head of a bat in the US. For those interested in Ozzies criminal activities, his only police charge was for stealing ladies underwear off a clothes line. Apparently the Police in the US never noticed his drug addiction and put it down to him being English

It's illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while you're sitting on a curb in St. Louis!

Hmm that is the standard container for the Full Moon parties on KPN.

CB

Feline factoids plus a piscean one.

A cat has 32 muscles in its ear.

Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

The muzzle of a lion is like a fingerprint - no two lions have the same pattern of whiskers.

A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.

Movies.

In the movie Pulp Fiction all the clocks are stuck at 4:20.

Pulp Fiction cost $8 million to make - $5 million going to actors wages.

In Mel Brooks "Silent Movie" mime Marcel Marceau is the only person to have a speaking role.

Deborah Winger did the voice of E.T.

Places.

Los Angeles's full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula" and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size, "L.A."

When the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers play football at home, the stadium becomes the state's third largest city.

Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

I just had a vision of a nurse running after them trying to catch the blood in a bottle, whilst they are still duelling

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds!

Unless it is at an Black Sabbath concert in which case the chicken lasted about 20 seconds before being torn to pieces. Ozzie tossed a chicken into the crowd assuming they can fly - "well itz a bird izzen it?" The crowd at the front of the stage killed it and Ozzie was charged with animal cruelty. At least he didn't have to get rabies shots unlike the time he bit the head of a bat in the US. For those interested in Ozzies criminal activities, his only police charge was for stealing ladies underwear off a clothes line. Apparently the Police in the US never noticed his drug addiction and put it down to him being English

It's illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while you're sitting on a curb in St. Louis!

Hmm that is the standard container for the Full Moon parties on KPN.

CB

Ozzies first encounter with a bird of the feathered kind was when he was negotiating a record contract, his manager/ wife had given him a dove to put up his sleeve to release as a sign of peace when the deal was done.

Talks didn't go too well and Ozzie bit off its head whilst it was still alive --- edit in fact wikipedia says it better than me--

After signing his first solo career record deal he came in to meet some of the people who worked at the record company. His plan was to release doves into the air to get people to notice him, but when no one noticed, he changed his plans. He grabbed a dove, bit its head off, then spat the head out.[8][9] Then with blood still dripping from his lips a security guard came to remove him; on the way out he bit the head off another dove. Despite its controversy, this act has been parodied and alluded to several times throughout his career and is part of what made Ozzy Osbourne infamous.[10]

Also I think he is definitely a contender for potential serial killer, again from Wikipedia

Osbourne admitted that, at the height of his drug addiction, he shot his family's pets:

"I was taking drugs so much I was a wreck, The final straw came when I shot all our cats. We had about 17, and I went crazy and shot them all. My wife found me under the piano in a white suit, a shotgun in one hand and a knife in the other.".[11]

Also I think he is definitely a contender for potential serial killer, again from Wikipedia

Osbourne admitted that, at the height of his drug addiction, he shot his family's pets:

"I was taking drugs so much I was a wreck, The final straw came when I shot all our cats. We had about 17, and I went crazy and shot them all. My wife found me under the piano in a white suit, a shotgun in one hand and a knife in the other.".[11]

When Ozzie when into "reclusion" at the now demolished (not related) Marmont (aka the Riot House) Hotel he had a standing order for a bottle (26fl.oz) of Jack Daniels, two cases of Beer, and a bottle of Scotch. He also ordered bacon and eggs for breakfast but apparently never ate them in the entire time he lived there. He got daily visits from his dealers and kept them separate from eachother so that no dealer would know how much he was actually consuming. Legend has it that John Holmes was one of his suppliers of cocaine and speed.

When Ozzies management - his wife (Sharon) and her brother (under the management company owned by their father) tried to get Ozzie back onto the road and more importantly the recording studio to complete the two contractual albums they sent a number of Californian guitar slingers to audition. Ozzie never turned up or was too stoned/drunk to comprehend. One young guy who was working in his parent's music store was Randy Rhoades. He was taken to Ozzies room and started to play but Oz wasn't interested and told hime to "please leave" or something along that line Rhoades got angry and turned up a small Fender Princeton amp to full blast and let fly on the guitar for nearly an hour. Ozzie said he was hired as long as he left straight away.

Rhoades and Osborne released two albums that have become Heavy Metal legend even if Osborne did go back and remaster ie take out and redub the Bass and Drums so as to avoid paying royalties to his then band mates

Rhoades was killed in a light aircraft (those things have killed more Rock and Rollers than all the drugs and ham sandwiches in creation). Rhoades and the pilot were to catch up with the tour bus - Rhoades had been doing a guitar clinic/demo. They spotted the tour bus and decided (as one does when they are stupid) to buzz it for fun. The plane clipped power lines, crashed and Rhoades was killed. The decision was made to not say how or what he died off because dying in a stupid prank wasn't deemed Rock and Roll enough.

Some years after the accident Ozzie was at a guitar show and they put the resurrected Flying V that was Randy's guitar in Ozzies hands - big mistake because he decided it was a gift and walked off with it.

CB

Did you know that male crocodiles have two penises in case one gets bitten or torn off during mating?

CB

Did you know that male crocodiles have two penises in case one gets bitten or torn off during mating?

CB

Do they both function similtaneously or is one kept in a kind of pouch as a spare? Can a croc get 2 bj's at the same time?

Can a croc get 2 bj's at the same time?

Leave me out of it

Oh your'e talking about a different BJ

Can a croc get 2 bj's at the same time?

Leave me out of it

If I said I've had two women at the same time would that count?

Croc

Did you know that male crocodiles have two penises in case one gets bitten or torn off during mating?

CB

Do they both function similtaneously or is one kept in a kind of pouch as a spare? Can a croc get 2 bj's at the same time?

To be honest I don't know. It was something I learned from Steve Irwin at the Australia Zoo. We were surfing at the time and he was saying in between sets that one of his big bull crocs had a heavy mating session with one of the females and as is their style there is a quite a lot of biting and scratching going on as he has to dominate her first. He said he thinks it most likely that she clawed back with her hind foot and snagged his penis tearing it off.

Steve said he thought that the old bull managed with the second one but would have to wait to see if she started to lay fertile eggs. He said it is not uncommon for bull crocs to have lost both and there was one on the croc farm that they thought for ages would be a prime sire but despite him going through the motions on a regular basis never sired any offspring. They tranquilised him for a vet check when he got a bad bite from a fight and discovered he had lost his rudders.

Crocodiles are an ancient species, they were around at the time of the dinosaur and it is believed that some or most of the big dinosaurs had the same set up. In a species where commonly the female is bigger and much more aggressive it has eveolutionary advantages.

If you check out sharks they evolved at around the same time and have the same twin set. The testes are locate tucked up safe near the kidney and the penis pair are outside. It was with mammals that the arangement reversed with the testes on the outside (for cooling of the sperm) and the penis inside. More evolved mammals had both the penis and testes on the outside and that has a lot to do with the way they mount for mating.

CB

I have a mate from Mansfield. I don't think anyone in his line has ever evolved, so I'll check his tackle out after the next beer fest and report back.

I have a mate from Mansfield. I don't think anyone in his line has ever evolved, so I'll check his tackle out after the next beer fest and report back.

If he goes by the nickname "john two cocks" it may give you a hint. I have to say though that I know you are an ex rugby player and all that but do your really think it appropriate to be checking out wedding tackles in the men's toilet. Don't they have special clubs and pubs for guys like you that haven't really come out of the closet yet?

CB

" They" have a whole country for people like "that"................................Australia.

" They" have a whole country for people like "that"................................Australia.

Mate that's a bit harsh - I was following up on the "Did you know" and the last one was "Suiging checks out the tackle from other men in the toilet at beer festivals" which was a quote from your post. No one mentioned Australia or any other of the other ex-colonies of the once great British Empire - well it was great until all the ex colonies left and the only thing remaining was Britain

Geeze you closet boys get a bit mingy when you out yourselves

CB

I resemble that remark !!!!

Thanks for enlightening me .

Did you know that the Luna's (the Earth's moon) rotation period is the same as it revolution period so it always has the same side facing the earth....and that no side of the moon is any darker than any other so the "dark side of the moon" is a myth.

Did you know that scientists have figured out a way to slow light down to less than the speed limit in Thailand (less than 90km/hr)?

Did you know Bobby Leach a well known daredevil was the second man to go over Niagra Falls in a barrel ( would be Viagra Falls, but water only goes one way ) and the architect of many world famous stunts, was killed in 1911 by a small piece of orange peel ?

He slipped on it in a street in New Zealand, broke his leg so badly that during it required sugery and he died through surgical complications.

Did you know that the Luna's (the Earth's moon) rotation period is the same as it revolution period so it always has the same side facing the earth....and that no side of the moon is any darker than any other so the "dark side of the moon" is a myth.

Did you know that scientists have figured out a way to slow light down to less than the speed limit in Thailand (less than 90km/hr)?

Did you know that the moon's gravitational pull is slowing down Earth's rotation? In the time on the dinosaurs it has been estimated that the day was only 22 hours long. It certainly seems to have a disproportionate effect on Monday mornings.

Do you know the difference between light and hard?

......or do you know the difference between lightly and hardly?

What happens if I drive FASTER than the speed of light - and turn the headlights on ?

Does the light in the refrigerator REALLY go out when I close the door ?

Peter

What happens if I drive FASTER than the speed of light - and turn the headlights on ?

You'll blind yourself.

What happens if I drive FASTER than the speed of light - and turn the headlights on ?

You'll blind yourself.

No, I think if you drive faster than the speed of light and MASTURBATE you'll blind yourself.

What happens if I drive FASTER than the speed of light - and turn the headlights on ?

You'll blind yourself.

No, I think if you drive faster than the speed of light and MASTURBATE you'll blind yourself.

Probably, but I was treating the light like pissing into the wind from a moving tuk tuk. If you don't piss faster than the wind it may come back & cover you & everybody else in the cabin.

What happens if I drive FASTER than the speed of light - and turn the headlights on ?

You'll blind yourself.

No, I think if you drive faster than the speed of light and MASTURBATE you'll blind yourself.

Probably, but I was treating the light like pissing into the wind from a moving tuk tuk. If you don't piss faster than the wind it may come back & cover you & everybody else in the cabin.

Yes, but urine has an odor but light does not so your analogy does not hold.....and furthermore doesn't everyone know that when pissing from a moving tuk tuk you piss out the BACK.....so really you should be talking about what would happen when traveling faster than the speed of light and you turn on your TAIL LIGHTS!!!! (For Brits: tail lights are the (usually) red ones on the back side of a vehicle...don't know what you guys call them.)

Chownah

Did you know that searing meat before baking does not seal the juices in? Test were done by baking meat with and without searing....if a piece of meat loses juices then it will weight less....you would expect the seared meat to lose less juice so it should weight more after baking....the results......its all the same.....searing had no effect on how much juice was lost during baking...at least in that experiment....your meat may vary.

CHownah