and its fr real

www.ralphbending.com

extract of a listing

Horticulturally minded three bedroom thatched cottage with hall, kitchen/breakfast room with 'boil your nuts off' aga, scullery, sitting room with open fire, bathroom, large garden for growing sprouts and parking. Available now

Growing sprouts and parking....... not usually used in the same sentence....... oh, it's Glastonbury.

Imagine an honest agent in Pattaya,

" One bedroom flat available in stylish downtown Pattaya block. Strong smell of urine from the lifts only bettered by the assault course of whores and Soi Dogs that await you, as you pass by piles of rubbish blocking the main entrance. Only one fat previous owner, a loveable 55 year old european , who recently sadly fell from the soon to be fixed balcony after a cultural exchange evening with his 17 year old Issan girlfriend and two or three ( police not quite sure of numbers ) of her previous boyfriends and or relatives.

Full ( I think, up to you to check ) title to the property and hardly any chance of previous owners family challenging the delightful girlfriends claim to this great priced, dream home

( girlfriend promises to either move out or take her busniss elsewhere.........soon ).

lol nice find, I particularly like this blurb

Wells Road - Glastonbury

Lovely two bedroom first floor apartment with hall, sitting room, kitchen/breakfast, bathroom and parking. Available now. Nice view of the new erection going up at the rear.

Way back when I was a mere slip of a lad - and even later, in the sixties - there was anestate agent around the Gloucester Road area who put honest, humorous descriptions in the Observer. It was about the only part of the paper I regulatly read - living in Eatls Court I knew most of the properties he handled.

With only 7 houses on his books for sale and 19 houses for let, i doubt he's going to make bucks out of this.