Why young Isaan ladies marry old farangs?

[micmichd]

Many Thai ladies prefer an older farang man because he will take care of them better and provide security for the family.

Thai husbands have a very bad reputation for drunkenness and womanising.

However,the Thai lady will often have a gik to take care of their physical needs if the old farang is drooping a bit.

The old fellah nods off (literally) at 7pm and out the wife goes to "get some groceries from 7/11 or Tesco's."

I know a lot of old retired farangs that barely can look after themselves, married to a wife that does all the work to keep them alive. Not sure if that was the image they dreamed of .

Yes, but still better than to be pushed into a Farang rest home or nursing home.

[jerojero]

Many Thai ladies prefer an older farang man because he will take care of them better and provide security for the family.

Thai husbands have a very bad reputation for drunkenness and womanising.

However,the Thai lady will often have a gik to take care of their physical needs if the old farang is drooping a bit.

The old fellah nods off (literally) at 7pm and out the wife goes to "get some groceries from 7/11 or Tesco's."

I know a lot of old retired farangs that barely can look after themselves, married to a wife that does all the work to keep them alive. Not sure if that was the image they dreamed of .

a better image than living in an old farts care home, being supposedly looked after (occasionally) by a unskilled worker who doesn't give a shi* Edited July 16, 2015 by jerojero

[pinkpanther99]

1. Have absolutely nothing in common

2. Cultures are so far apart, that even a speed of light rocket would never get either one of them there

3. No common language

4. No clear communication or understanding

5. Totally different set of values and moral

6. 30 years apart energy levels

For her: Money, money and money

For Him: Sex, Nursing and kind words(lies) of what a lovely man he is

Success rate: As long as he realizes of the business arrangement, it may last for long time, plus without her, he could not even get a beer.

As long as she does not meet another one with more money to burn and gives whatever she asks for, love will flourish

This post is putting it bluntly but there is certainly an element of truth in what konying is saying here.

[slipperylobster]

Sometimes, I think, some of the older guys are trying to keep the combined ages of themselves..added to that of their wives...to below 100.

[connda]

Thankfully most of us have choices.

Some prefer the bar scene & casual, pay as you go sex.

Others prefer the domestic life

I have experienced both. Depending upon your situation in life, you make a choice.

There is no good v bad - right v wrong.

BUT, no $$$ no choices!

BUT, no $$$ no choices!

Commonly referred to in the LOS as: "No money, no honey!"

[connda]

Thankfully most of us have choices.

Some prefer the bar scene & casual, pay as you go sex.

Others prefer the domestic life

I have experienced both. Depending upon your situation in life, you make a choice.

There is no good v bad - right v wrong.

BUT, no $$$ no choices!

Even that may not be true.

I had no money at all in Thailand for 2 months, lovely Heidelberger Volksbank cancelled my bank account and returned my pensions to sender without even telling me. And it was Thais that helped me to get over the $$$ shortage, many of them Isaan ladies.

Just because you hit a rough patch now, doesn't mean that you'll not be a good prospect in the future. Gratdanu. They help you out, show jai dee, when you get things straighten out again, the potential 'Mrs' will be waiting in line at your door.

[connda]

Having read so many "for the money" & "poor education" comments ...

Wife (55) has a niece, late 20's, who want's a farang husband -- "like loong klikster".

Mother (my SIL) is Isaan, father from wealthy Supan Buri Chinese family. She is quite an attractive and personable young woman -- master's degree in computer science, works as a computer programmer for the health ministry in BKK. She has a new car and her own home.

FWIW, I'm pushing 75 and a fair bit overweight.

It ain't all about $$$$$$ every time.

Do you have the niece's phone number. Bangkok is far enough away to have a mia noi. Lol

[JLCrab]

1. Have absolutely nothing in common

2. Cultures are so far apart, that even a speed of light rocket would never get either one of them there

3. No common language

4. No clear communication or understanding

5. Totally different set of values and moral

6. 30 years apart energy levels

For her: Money, money and money

For Him: Sex, Nursing and kind words(lies) of what a lovely man he is

Success rate: As long as he realizes of the business arrangement, it may last for long time, plus without her, he could not even get a beer.

As long as she does not meet another one with more money to burn and gives whatever she asks for, love will flourish

This post is putting it bluntly but there is certainly an element of truth in what konying is saying here.

Anyone who has six dogs may already be weird.

[doggie1955]

I don't want to judge, but... there, first dash of hypocrisy of this post because what I wright will in some form or other become a judgement, its impossible not to judge or have an opinion on this topic when living in Thailand....

Old guys and young girls... I have an opinion, I wouldn't wish for my daughter (if I had one) or sister to date or marry a guy 20 / 30 / 40 years her elder. Yet, when I have entered my golden years and find myself single I wouldn't have any concerns about dating a girl 20 / 30 / 40 years younger..... There, second dash of hypocrisy...

We see this age divide in areas with far poorer 'social mobility'... many just don't have the chances of 'moving up' as they see it. So, the extra security (either real or perceived) offered by those older foreigners wishing to date a younger, fitter, healthier lady is enough to secure company.

I'm pretty sure its more a decision of finance and security than it is of love and attraction, however, relationships evolve and develop... I'm sure many are happy with this situation so long as mutual respect remains.

My situation: gerry123 pretty much nailed it... But that doesn't mean I'll judge the older guys with poorer younger girls in a negative light, I hope they are happy, respectful of each other and enjoying life... But what are these girls after? For the most part I'd say Financial Security... and beyond that some respect and companionship.

Success rates: Milage must really vary - lets face it, as we become more modern, fickle, changeable and less traditional the success rates of any relationship dwindle....

I look at it this way, if it's good enough for Hugh Hefner... then go for it. Tell me one man who would not want to live the life of Hugh Hefner, unless he is gay!

Edited July 16, 2015 by doggie1955

[jarhead50200]

Well somewhat of a no brainer, it is not rocket science, more like a business arrangement. Myself I like shiny cars and 60 inch TV's and of course they are not free so I duh, I have to pay money for these things. Of course out of 5 marriages wives 2 and 3 had money but since I got into my 60,s no women want to support me anymore, ha ha. I love these deep intellectual posts about why old man and young girl hook up in Thailand. Hoorah for you geniuses!!!!

[JLCrab]

Well somewhat of a no brainer, it is not rocket science, more like a business arrangement. Myself I like shiny cars and 60 inch TV's and of course they are not free so I duh, I have to pay money for these things. Of course out of 5 marriages wives 2 and 3 had money but since I got into my 60,s no women want to support me anymore, ha ha. I love these deep intellectual posts about why old man and young girl hook up in Thailand. Hoorah for you geniuses!!!!

Another no brainer-- marriage analysis from a guy who has had 5 wives.

[Daniel Boon]

I am 67yo - wife is 36yo. We have been together for 11 years. She has no Chinese blood.

When you was 36 did you want to bonk a 67 year old woman ? No its disgusting. When you was 25 did you want to bonk a 56 year old hag ? Disgusting

can't you read ... no he didn't, so he didn't ... he went the younger route ..

[micmichd]

Thankfully most of us have choices.

Some prefer the bar scene & casual, pay as you go sex.

Others prefer the domestic life

I have experienced both. Depending upon your situation in life, you make a choice.

There is no good v bad - right v wrong.

BUT, no $$$ no choices!

Even that may not be true.

I had no money at all in Thailand for 2 months, lovely Heidelberger Volksbank cancelled my bank account and returned my pensions to sender without even telling me. And it was Thais that helped me to get over the $$$ shortage, many of them Isaan ladies.

Just because you hit a rough patch now, doesn't mean that you'll not be a good prospect in the future. Gratdanu. They help you out, show jai dee, when you get things straighten out again, the potential 'Mrs' will be waiting in line at your door.

So, what?

The point is that they trusted me, whereas Heidelberger Volksbank called the police when I asked them for a short-time credit. And these Farang banksters knew very well about my claims (they knew my contracts), whereas Isaan ladies just had my word.

Of course I paid back, I stand to my word. And there's no Isaan ladies "standing in line" now to rip me off.

[richard_smith237]

I am 67yo - wife is 36yo. We have been together for 11 years. She has no Chinese blood.

When you was 36 did you want to bonk a 67 year old woman ? No its disgusting. When you was 25 did you want to bonk a 56 year old hag ? Disgusting

can't you read ... no he didn't, so he didn't ... he went the younger route ..

Can't you?.... brling was 'reversing' the Male vs Female situation / age gap with a hypothetical question.....

For a 25 or a 36 year old male it would seem disgusting to 'bonk' a woman 21 years your elder.... or for most it would.

So why is that not any different for women? or is it and we just think its ok?....

Would a financially independant, educated, attractive young lady really be interested in someone 20+ years her senior? or would she prefer someone closer to her own age and status?

[Singharh]

Why do you think the Thai girls prefer older western men ? In my humble opinion and from talking to many Thai ladies,which include well educated ladies...it's a question of them being better at taking care of her in the long run....ie Thai guy marries young girl his age,she gets pregnant,he is no longer interested in her and takes a gig or two. Now she is saddled with a child and he refuses to pay maintenance. Sounds familiar ? This is also a reason why so many beautiful Thai ladies prefer same sex relationships.But I'm not talking about bargirls who are only out to get a sponsor,or two.

[PeVee1st]

MONEY!!!!!!

[Singharh]

Bar girls,yes. But there are hundreds of well educated Thai ladies who prefer western men. When you frequent lady bars you will find gold diggers. If you look for a decent girl in the right place it's not just about money. Security yes,like it's exactly the same in a western country. Will you marry your daughter of to a guy who will not be able to provide for her and their children ? I don't think so.

[Mazungu]

Posted: Would a financially independent, educated, attractive young lady really be interested in someone 20+ years her senior? Or would she prefer someone closer to her own age and status?

Let’s see now….I don’t think any of these women were destitute, many of them were quite educated and all attractive young ladies when they married much older men:

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

Wendi Deng Murdoch

Julie Chen

Lauren Bacall

Catherine Zeta-Jones

Elizabeth Taylor

Sophia Loren

Celine Dion

Gloria Vanderbilt

Mia Farrow

Catherine Zeta-Jones

Kathie Lee Gifford

Paulina Porizkova

Shania Twain

Nancy Kerrigan

Milla Jovovich

Calista Flockhart

etc.

etc.

[konying]

1. Have absolutely nothing in common

2. Cultures are so far apart, that even a speed of light rocket would never get either one of them there

3. No common language

4. No clear communication or understanding

5. Totally different set of values and moral

6. 30 years apart energy levels

For her: Money, money and money

For Him: Sex, Nursing and kind words(lies) of what a lovely man he is

Success rate: As long as he realizes of the business arrangement, it may last for long time, plus without her, he could not even get a beer.

As long as she does not meet another one with more money to burn and gives whatever she asks for, love will flourish

Amazing how so many of you on here just want to generalize and have no idea what you're talking about. I'm not picking on konying, but he does have a nice list I can use.

My wife and I are 25 years apart and have a wonderful relationship.

1. No, we didn't have a lot in common initially, we do now. There's nothing wrong with not having a lot in common with someone, it's fun to make your own memories together.

2. Yes, my culture is different than hers, I like that. I personally don't care much for many of the American ladies I left behind.

3. I've learned better Thai, she's learned much better English.

4. After 10 years of being together we understand each other pretty well, better than I ever had with an older western lady.

5. Values and morals are not much different, we are both good people and that's the important part.

6. My energy levels are actually much higher than hers, I don't mind going on a long walk on hot days, she doesn't care for being outside in the heat.

Money: We share most of our money, I certainly do not spoil her. She has no gold, no fancy designer bags or clothing and she understands the value in not buying those things.

Sex, Nursing: I've had plenty of sex back in the states, I didn't need to come here for it. She does take care of me pretty well, however, no different than my mother took care of my father. We were both brought up that way and she enjoys seeing me happy, and I her.

So, next time you guys want to know why someone is with someone else, why don't you just ask them?

Thanks for sharing your side of the story, I wonder if hers is the same .

You learning some Thai and her learning some English leaves a pretty big gap, sorry to tell you, no matter what you might like to think.

You not liking your own culture and not knowing hers, despite what you like to believe is another flaw which you do not even realise . Your culture is what made you the way you are. You are now "respecting " hers while she does not know nor care about yours.

These are just facts which no doubt you will refute .

But that's the difference between understanding the reality and making one up.

As for you speaking Thai as otter pensioners like to claim , not picking on you but I find it hilarious.

I moved to Thailand when I was 26, went to school, work with Thai and after 15 years I would hardly call my Thai fluent , yet a 60 year old manages to learn fluent or good enough to have deep and meaningful conversations?

well perhaps as you stated you moved to Thailand at 26, then went to school you have some significant learning difficulties, after all most people have left school and university at that age so this may explain why you find it hard to believe older people have the mental capacity to learn other languages fluently.

I can not comment for other older people, but in your case, would appear being delusional is just one of mental capacity issues you may suffer.

Yes, possibly learning Thai outside 7-11 with cheap beer is an alternative, but i was only aware of one way, which was to attend school.

I would also like to point out, knowing 3 words in Thai does not make you fluent, even less so when you pronounce all 3 wrong.

[jarhead50200]

Victim or volunteer, too bad and too - sad some are tainted by painful experiences, (you can tell who they are) live and learn, buyer beware. I can happily say I am a satisfied customer.

[ttthailand]

who cares what other people think... As long as you are not hurting anyone else Enjoy your life ....

[richard_smith237]

Posted: Would a financially independent, educated, attractive young lady really be interested in someone 20+ years her senior? Or would she prefer someone closer to her own age and status?

Let’s see now….I don’t think any of these women were destitute, many of them were quite educated and all attractive young ladies when they married much older men:

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

Wendi Deng Murdoch

Julie Chen

Lauren Bacall

Catherine Zeta-Jones

Elizabeth Taylor

Sophia Loren

Celine Dion

Gloria Vanderbilt

Mia Farrow

Catherine Zeta-Jones

Kathie Lee Gifford

Paulina Porizkova

Shania Twain

Nancy Kerrigan

Milla Jovovich

Calista Flockhart

etc.

etc.

Good point - I'm sure there are more examples of financially independent, educated, attractive young ladies willing to marry older men...

However, if we were to run a census what percentage would we see? I'd hazard a guess and suggest much less than 1%...

Jacqui marrying Ari, and the other good examples you have provided offer an excellent counter to my argument, however, that does not change the nature of the point I was making, there will alway be exceptions to any generalisation, but as generalisations go its a fairly safe bet that the overwhelming majority of financially independent, educated, attractive young ladies are more interested in someone their own age and status....

[JLCrab]

Re the above from Wikipedia : "Calista Flockhart has been in a relationship with actor Harrison Ford since their meeting at the Golden Globe Awards on January 20, 2002 ... and were married on June 15, 2010."

The story I read is that Ms. Flockhart met Mr. Ford at the Golden Globes by deliberately spilling a glass of wine on him.

[Anon999]

Posts 4 & 5. Thank you for your input.

Are you relating your personal experience or is it bartalk?

Personal experience of 10 yrs here (mid 20's to mid-30's) 2 years of which were in Isaan as a single-man.

what they get up to when ol' fella is at home you wouldn't believe.

Many take actual pride in it, bringing over bottles of Black Label boasting that the ATM paid for it, the new scooter, car, whatever.

Just speaking the truth.

Yes there are many like that about but don't generalise. It depends on the people you you mix with. Personally I've never had that problem with my Thai wives and g/f's, since 1987, either in the UK or here. The keys are to be careful, selective and avoid jumping in with both feet! There's no hurry unless you're going to 'kick the bucket' next week! Avoiding b/g's and farm girls is a good starting point.

Edited July 17, 2015 by Anon999

[Morakot]

Re the above from Wikipedia : "Calista Flockhart has been in a relationship with actor Harrison Ford since their meeting at the Golden Globe Awards on January 20, 2002 ... and were married on June 15, 2010."

The story I read is that Ms. Flockhart met Mr. Ford at the Golden Globes by deliberately spilling a glass of wine on him.

[elliss]

Answer... Why Not???

Aside from that, Thailand is not the only place where this is the norm, I have a European friend in Cuba who has just married a 21 yo lady, he is 72. So it is certainly not just a Thai thing.

Regards TD

Wow , leally , kap.

[DILLIGAD]

Posts 4 & 5. Thank you for your input.

Are you relating your personal experience or is it bartalk?

Personal experience of 10 yrs here (mid 20's to mid-30's) 2 years of which were in Isaan as a single-man.

what they get up to when ol' fella is at home you wouldn't believe.

Many take actual pride in it, bringing over bottles of Black Label boasting that the ATM paid for it, the new scooter, car, whatever.

Just speaking the truth.

Yes there are many like that about but don't generalise. It depends on the people you you mix with. Personally I've never had that problem with my Thai wives and g/f's, since 1987, either in the UK or here. The keys are to be careful, selective and avoid jumping in with both feet! There's no hurry unless you're going to 'kick the bucket' next week! Avoiding b/g's and farm girls is a good starting point.

Re read your first and last sentence, please! LOL

[rocketboybkk]

I recognise that people marry for different reasons. Having recently relocated from Chiang Mai to Isaan, I observe this occurrence often. I do not mean a 10 year age gap - more a 40 year age gap.

Naturally, $$$ (lack thereof) is a reason.

Other reasons?

The success rate of such a relationship compared to the average?

There are no other reasons

And if anyone believes that a 20yo girls marries a 65 yo faring for any other reason then they've either done it themselves & don't want to face the reason or they're mad.

No 20 yo will marry a 65 yo other than for money & his assets when he's dead - which they hope won't be far off

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[huawei]

They marry guys older than their fathers. The newly married foreigner is older than the father in law....what sort of family dynamic is that..very odd....

[EmptyHead]

I am 67yo - wife is 36yo. We have been together for 11 years. She has no Chinese blood.

Good for you.

I doubt it about the Chinese blood thing. If there even were such a thing. Or maybe that proves your point.

Why has she married you?