When I was a kid people used to cover me in chocolate and cream and put
a cherry on my head.

Yeah, life was tough in the gateau.

Not all construction work is equally enjoyable. For example, enlarging a drilled hole is boring, but fastening pieces of metal together is riveting.

A girl locks her keys in her car in front of the abortion clinic.

 

She goes inside and asks for a coat hanger.

Some days ago, I came to know a  girl on the Internet. Beautiful...
After some chat, I felt that we had connected at a deeper level.
Yesterday, she asked me to visit her house and said, "My husband is on a business trip, and I'm alone at home."
I was very cautious and asked, "Will your husband suddenly come back?
She said, "No, but just in case he does, you just say that you are from UrbanClap and that your company sent you to clean the house. And then, clean the glass or something.
Anyway, the Deepavali festival is coming.
My husband won't suspect a thing."
Fast forward, I was at her house. And what a big coincidence - Not even minutes in the house, her husband came back!
I had to be quiet and pretend to do the cleaning, wiping windows, cleaning the kitchen and the floor. And also tidy the bedrooms and wash the bathrooms. All the while, her husband and she was next to me giving all kinds of ridiculous instructions.
When I had finished and was about to leave, her husband asked, 'How much?"
Even before I could utter a word, she said, "I have already paid the company."
On the way home, I kept thinking about the whole saga.
The more I thought about it,
the more I felt DAMN cheated ?...
Cleaners are hard to find, beware of the new scam for Deepavali.

On 1/15/2022 at 10:01 AM, ballpoint said:

Sheikh Anvak is famous for having the freshest carpets in the whole of Qatar.

Did you forget his head chef

Sheikh Enbayke

9 hours ago, Crossy said:

 

10 hours ago, Crossy said:

 

 

 

3 hours ago, Beachcomber said:

When I was a kid people used to cover me in chocolate and cream and put
a cherry on my head.

Yeah, life was tough in the gateau.

Could have been worse. People used to stuff jelly into my right ear and custard into my left ...

 

... To this day I am still a trifle deaf.

These are the wurst jokes as the german sausage maker said.

7 hours ago, overherebc said:

These are the wurst jokes as the german sausage maker said.

He never sau-sage bad jokes

2 hours ago, roo860 said:

It's pronounced Nice.

I love taking pictures of myself standing next to a boiling kettle.

The doctor says I've got selfie steam issues.

My wife hired a lesbian couple to build our new kitchen, and I'm most impressed.

Not a single screw is used, but their tongue in groove work is amazing.