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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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49 minutes ago, Crossy said:

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Scary. Two days ago I worked out 10 gallons was now £70+  Don't want to think about next month.

2 hours ago, overherebc said:

Scary. Two days ago I worked out 10 gallons was now £70+  Don't want to think about next month.

10 gallons of diesel here in Thailand will cost me just over £27 today.

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11 minutes ago, billd766 said:

10 gallons of diesel here in Thailand will cost me just over £27 today.

 

Yeah, 60 litres which is just about a full tank on the Mu-X (65 litre tank) is 1,797 Baht at today's rate, about 41 Squid for 13 imperial UK real gallons. 

 

We shall see how long the oil-fund can keep diesel below 30 Baht as promosed by you know who.

 

Madam is again "strongly" in favour of getting an EV (and more solar to fuel it), of course Muggins here will be shelling for it. 

"I don't want to know why you can't. I want to know how you can!"

People sometimes accuse me of sexism, but one thing is absolutely certain
I'll never hate a woman as much as a fat bird hates a good looking one.

Pretend to be a skilled pharmacist by taking half an hour to put some tablets in a bag.

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Paddy says to Mick
"Have you heard the news? Three Cliff Walkers have fallen to their deaths".

"Unbelievable" Says Mick,
"I can't believe they all had the same name"

I've been prescribed anti-gloating cream...
I can't wait to rub it in.

Give a Russian soldier some firewood and he will be warm for a day,

fire a missile at his tank and he will be warm for the rest of his life!

I got a job in the candle factory - bit monotonous but good money.

We had to take a bit of string, put it in the mould and then pour in molten wax.
My mate Gary worked there too.  Sometimes he would leap out of his chair onto my bench and sit on my string.

He really got on my wick.

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