"Dad, can you tell me what an eclipse is?"

" No son"

I had a right fright just now. I was in the bath reading a ghost story, next thing I felt a tap on my shoulder.

My wife and I are finally sexually compatible.
Now we both get a headache at the same time.

While much is known about the great Diana Dors, very little is known about her sister Erin.

Except she never went out much.

I've just finished reading about the entire history of lubricant.

It's the best non friction book I've ever read

I thought that finally I was over my obsession with Tipperary,

but my doctor says I still have a way to go.

My career path over my life was to become a wit -
I'm halfway there.
 

I asked the Doctor
'Is my being overweight due to my underactive thyroid?'
He said 'No, it's due to your overactive knife and fork'

3 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said:

Who does that? Nailing the scrotum to the kitchen table I mean.

Seems a bit extreme. 

I like the thought of the back entry move while shouting 'Who's hour Daddy'.