Men all around the world between 40 to 60 years, will on average have sex 2 to 3 times per week.
Whereas Japanese men, in the exact same age group will have sex once or twice a year if they are lucky.
This has come as very upsetting news to most of my friends as they had no idea they were Japanese.

Watching the world cup the other day, my wife bet me that I couldn't name 3 Qatar players.
I said George Harrison, Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix.

"All of the UK must be thankful that Prince William was born first."

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

How did you do that research?  Did you go round giving octopi test tickles?  That takes a lot of balls.

I am a sucker for all embracing research with tentacles in all sorts of interesting places!

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Breaking News!

Man with a stammer jailed.

Judge rules he's unlikely to complete his sentence.

Damm it!  I misread the above and thought that a man had been jailed with Sir K Starmer!

 

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Paddy the electrician has been sacked by the US prison service for refusing to repair the electric chair.
He said that in his opinion it was a death trap.

Shocking attitude by today's workers!

it will lead to the death of corporal punishment as we know it!

Bring back hanging is all I can say!

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

I shouted: “Push harder” when my wife was in labour.
“I hate you” she screamed,
I thought that was a bit harsh, It wasn’t my fault the car broke down on the way to the hospital.

I think leaving the hand brake on was not what the doctor meant when he said he wanted the wife to be in labour earlier rather than later!

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

 

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

I used to hate it when my mum would dress me and my twin brother in the same clothes.
We could hardly walk!

Why were you both wearing your mum's clothes?

The family a bit kinky?

 

 

Ps; Sorry about the editing problem above

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Men all around the world between 40 to 60 years, will on average have sex 2 to 3 times per week.
Whereas Japanese men, in the exact same age group will have sex once or twice a year if they are lucky.
This has come as very upsetting news to most of my friends as they had no idea they were Japanese.

I'm definitely not Japanese but it seems I should come into the above equation!

Is there something I can do about this?

4 hours ago, DezLez said:

Shocking attitude by today's workers!

it will lead to the death of corporal punishment as we know it!

Bring back hanging is all I can say!

I knew you would make a gleeful injection into this topic by taking a stand on the electric chair.  Once you bring back hanging you should find an artist who rents rooms, and get yourself drawn and quartered as well.

9 hours ago, ballpoint said:

How did you do that research?  Did you go round giving octopi test tickles?  That takes a lot of balls.

Probably cost a few squid as well ????

2 hours ago, roo860 said:

Yes i must admit,i traveled a lot when i was younger and things just happened.

A good thing there were no cameras in those days.

2 hours ago, roo860 said:

If i had one of those 'V' things i would be a millionaire also.

14 hours ago, ballpoint said:

I knew you would make a gleeful injection into this topic by taking a stand on the electric chair.  Once you bring back hanging you should find an artist who rents rooms, and get yourself drawn and quartered as well.

I did not want to sit on the fence on this one so I just thought I should execute a few puns rather than just let the subject die an unnatural death!

 

PS;  I made a mistake last week when I was told to send the 12 man Irish army firing squad round to the execution yard.  They took me literally and put the prisoner in the middle of their circle and shot 10 of their own comrades!

 

PPS;  The prisoner survived!

42 minutes ago, jvs said:

If i had one of those 'V' things i would be a millionaire also.

From what I have heard you wouldn't make that much given your looks!

????