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The baaad Christmas jokes thread - old, new, recycled we don't care, they just have to be bad!

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People often forget the important religious aspect to Christmas ...

 

582181014_Xmas5holidays.jpg.a7cde02c8fca944dfe728f26cdb43fc7.jpg

What falls at the North Pole but never gets hurt?
Snow.

 

What never eats at Christmas dinner?
The turkey – it’s stuffed.

 

Where does a stuttering Santa stay when he is on holiday?
At a Ho-ho-ho-tel.

 

What do you call Frosty the Snowman in May?
A puddle!

 

Did you know that Rudolph the Reindeer never went to school?
He was elf taught.
 

What do snowmen usually wear on their heads? 
Ice caps!

 

Where do you find chilli beans at Christmas? 
At the north pole!

 

What is a librarians favorite Christmas song? 
Silent Night

 

What do you call a frozen elf hanging from the ceiling? 
An elfcicle!

10 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

1161486166_Santa3balls.jpg.d6a0577aabc966c581c1e2b93701b329.jpg

I thought Santa's Elf and Safety claws would have covered that!

RE ABOVE VIDEO;

I don't want to blow Andrew away but "tusk tusk" you could have made the tree lighter without us pine(ing) for a needle(less) ending.

 

Merry Christmas to all and enjoy your Xmas Punning!

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RE ABOVE VIDEO;
I don't want to blow Andrew away but "tusk tusk" you could have made the tree lighter without us pine(ing) for a needle(less) ending.
 
Merry Christmas to all and enjoy your Xmas Punning!

Merry Christmas to you Scottie and all the posters on this thread ????????????

Here is my present to you, the Prince of one liners at work ( you of course are the King Scottie ).

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