Thriving as an empath in this land

[Been there done that]

5 hours ago, Enoon said:

 

"Choosing" to "switch on/off" empathy is the mark of the sociopath.

 

In fact they choose to temporarily display the qualities of empathy for their own satisfaction/purposes.

 

Usually to convince others (but sometimes themselves) of their own "decency".

 

And nothing to do with what empathy actually is.

 

 

 

 

 

A bully always gets in defensemode mode when questioned. 

Edited December 24, 2018 by Been there done that

[BritManToo]

8 minutes ago, Been there done that said:

But how did you lose it all, hence the coldheartedness perhaps.

Feminized governments (and welfare, which is all aimed at women).

Once English women got the vote, England was finished.

Edited December 24, 2018 by BritManToo

[Spidey]

I've always had the philosophy of "Do unto others as they do unto you". Most Thais I know have been exceptionally kind and caring towards me so I try to treat them the same way. It has been a bit of a learning curve as I find Thais more empathetic than I was accustomed to in my own country.

[Hummin]

3 hours ago, unamazedloso said:

im an empathetic person and thais are just not unless there is something in it for them as far as my experience has been.

Im happy doing my own thing and trying to ignore. Its literally impossible. Need big walls mentally and physically....

Do we really do anything, if therr is nothing in it for us? Seriously? You need to wake up, because the mirror effect will slam you hard one day.

[Been there done that]

1 hour ago, Hummin said:

Do we really do anything, if therr is nothing in it for us? Seriously? You need to wake up, because the mirror effect will slam you hard one day.

Define....in it for us.

 

Thanks.

[Hummin]

5 minutes ago, Been there done that said:

Define....in it for us.

 

Thanks.

You might ask the op?

 

Have a great holiday ????

[AlexRich]

5 hours ago, KhunFred said:

If all the posters who became abusive and showed lack of compassion were booted, the forum would definitely improve. I've seen more sociopathic posts on this forum than on any other except a well-known Cambodia forum. I was amazed at how many people I have had to block because of posts and attitudes that display no knowledge of the concepts of empathy or sympathy. Strangely enough, most of them hail from GB, which has a plethora of assistance programs for those down on their luck, as well as one of the finest single-payer health schemes in the entire world. It's amazing to me that a country which is known for one of the most humane welfare states in the the world, produces so many stone-hearted individuals.

 

I think you fail to understand the black humour of people from Great Britain, it’s pretty much a tradition, to find humour in the worst of situations ... and if you are from the USA it might just go straight over your head. You may be applying a literal interpretation to something which is essentially a joke?

[Been there done that]

11 minutes ago, Hummin said:

You might ask the op?

 

Have a great holiday ????

Ohhhhh ????

[Been there done that]

Just now, AlexRich said:

 

I think you fail to understand the black humour of people from Great Britain, it’s pretty much a tradition, to find humour in the worst of situations ... and if you are from the USA it might just go straight over your head. You may be applying a literal interpretation to something which is essentially a joke?

Ohhh to present oneself as a coldhearted person is in fact ...a joke ????????

 

Interesting.

[AlexRich]

5 hours ago, BritManToo said:

We didn't conquer the world by being kind or nice.

And we’ve never been god fearing and empathetic enough to drop a nuclear bomb on a civilian population?

[sanemax]

15 hours ago, AlexRich said:

If you are a farang with a good heart and an empathetic nature you will thrive in Thailand ... right up to the point were you go home broke!

 

You need to always look after yourself first , yes, help other people , but dont give them everything that you got  

[AlexRich]

2 minutes ago, Been there done that said:

Ohhh to present oneself as a coldhearted person is in fact ...a joke ????????

 

Interesting.

Interesting, and no less true for being so. Dark humour is part of the culture. I frequently see people on here getting upset about a comment that is obviously a joke. 

[AlexRich]

Just now, sanemax said:

You need to always look after yourself first , yes, help other people , but dont give them everything that you got  

 

It was a “many a true word said in jest” comment.

[Been there done that]

23 minutes ago, AlexRich said:

Interesting, and no less true for being so. Dark humour is part of the culture. I frequently see people on here getting upset about a comment that is obviously a joke. 

There is a distinctive difference between dark humour and coldheartedness, would you not say ? 

[Been there done that]

26 minutes ago, sanemax said:

You need to always look after yourself first , yes, help other people , but dont give them everything that you got  

Like crayons ????????????????????

[sanemax]

39 minutes ago, Been there done that said:

Like crayons ????????????????????

Yes , no problem giving small things away...............just dont go giving houses away

[Katia]

There's a difference between a joke that's funny in a dark way, and a comment that's inappropriate/insensitive.  I have a pretty damn dark and dry sense of humor, but even I know when something is obliquely funny as opposed to straight-up cruel or inappropriate; and also when my audience will not in any way see the humor but instead will only be offended or hurt, vs. when they'll laugh uproariously or at least "get" that it's supposed to be humor.

 

Perhaps "empathy" is to know the difference... "coldheartedness" is to know and not care.

Edited December 24, 2018 by Katia

[Nyezhov]

12 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

I wonder just how many Americans have died violently as a result of the macho fantasies displayed in the 'Dirty Harry' movies?

 

Buster Keating would have made a better Callaghan-with  Eastwood as the chimpanzee-oops wrong American spaghetti fantasy.

That fantasy says more about you than the imaginary Americans you fantasize about. I feel pity for you.

 

See,I have empathy. ????

 

Merry Christmas to All!

Edited December 24, 2018 by Nyezhov

[rvaviator]

A cynic takes the test :
 
1. Have I’ve been labeled as “overly sensitive,” shy, or introverted?
 
   Most people would have been labelled that at one time or another 
 
2. Do I frequently get overwhelmed or anxious?
 
    Its not uncommon for anyone to feel anxious at times 
 
3. Do arguments or yelling make me ill?
 
   Not ill , but unhappy , no one likes to argue
 
5. Am I drained by crowds and need alone time to revive myself?
 
   Crowds are tiring and everyone needs sometime alone

6. Am I over stimulated by noise, odors, or non-stop talkers?
 
   Strong odors , noise and non-stop talkers do cause over stimulation
 
 
7. Do I have chemical sensitivities or can’t tolerate scratchy clothes?
 
   No one likes scratchy clothes
 
8. Do I prefer taking my own car places so I can leave early if I need to?
 
    Of course , everyone prefers independence 
9. Do I overeat to cope with stress?
Its not uncommon for people to over eat and blame their piggery on stress
 
10. Am I afraid of becoming suffocated by intimate relationships?
    We all like out own space
 
  11. Do I startle easily?
At times , everyone does 
 
12. Do I react strongly to caffeine or medications?
 
    Who doesnt ?
13. Do I have a low pain threshold?
    Everyone feels pain

14. Do I tend to socially isolate?
Some people are not crowd people
 
15. Do I absorb other people’s stress, emotions, or symptoms?
   Everyone does, to a certain degree 

16. Am I overwhelmed by multitasking and prefer doing one thing at a time?
  Yes, multi taskinbg is overwhelming and its better to do one thing at a time

17. Do I replenish myself in nature?
   Yes, its relaxing to take a walk in the park
 
18. Do I need a long time to recuperate after being with difficult people or energy vampires?
  How long is "a long time"?
 
19. Do I feel better in small cities or the country than large cities?
  Smaller cities
 
20. Do I prefer one-to-one interactions or small groups rather than large gatherings?
   How are you supposed to answer yes or no to these questions ?
You are given two choices and whatever you answer yes to , that means that you have a problem and need to buy the book to resolve your problem 
 

 

Special Xmas offer 19.99$ including postage and packing


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[timendres]

21 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

22 hours ago, PerkinsCuthbert said:

There is only one rule I follow in Thailand, courtesy of Harry Callahan:

"Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?"

I wonder just how many Americans have died violently as a result of the macho fantasies displayed in the 'Dirty Harry' movies?

4.7 Americans. Still looking for the 0.3...

 

But seriously, I doubt that anyone has died violently as the result of Dirty Harry.

Many have died violently due to poorly run police forces and failed foreign policy.

When the government asks, "Do you feel lucky?", you'll wish you had Dirty Harry.

[sanemax]

3 minutes ago, timendres said:

4.7 Americans. Still looking for the 0.3...

 

But seriously, I doubt that anyone has died violently as the result of Dirty Harry.

Many have died violently due to poorly run police forces and failed foreign policy.

When the government asks, "Do you feel lucky?", you'll wish you had Dirty Harry.

Right off-topic

[geriatrickid]

On 12/24/2018 at 2:19 AM, sanemax said:

How do you know that though ?

The best begging spots in Bangkok are controlled by organized crime. It's no secret.  In Patong, children roam Bangla sell crap. They do it in front of the cops. It is against the law for a child age 5-10 to be out of school and  working the streets at a late hour. I used to be concerned and to feel the pain of the kids when I first saw it in  Patong years ago, but then I realized that it's part of the cycle of poverty and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I think every   normal person who has seen this has felt the same thing, even the most hardened and cold amongst us.  I am not  able to mount a social revolution, nor am I in a position to enforce the Thai laws that apply to child exploitation and corruption. All I can do is try try and lead a responsible life respectful of others.

[geriatrickid]

20 hours ago, AlexRich said:

 

I think you fail to understand the black humour of people from Great Britain, it’s pretty much a tradition, to find humour in the worst of situations ... and if you are from the USA it might just go straight over your head. You may be applying a literal interpretation to something which is essentially a joke?

That British humour is what sustained a nation in its darkest hour. When they are at their best, no one is better. Jimmy Carr  at his zenith with 8 out of 10 cats, would strike some as cruel.  Richard Ayoade's acerbic brilliance goes over the head of so many and of course the fashionista Noel Fielding can devour. (I left out the old classics since I am hip, although I now understand  why my father loved watching the Benny Hill show.) Some would say Benny Hill was foul and lacked empathy  for women and the mentally challenged, but he was the opposite.