At 70 years old I’m looking for the antidote – Do you have it?

[DILLIGAD]

My Grand dad married a 3rd time at 95 and saw all 3 wives off. The wedding was on (UK) national TV. Popped his clogs at 98 but he never had the frustration of ‘Thainess’ to cope with!


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[KKr]

18 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

managed to find an antidote that at least makes you feel better

apart from Whipping a Granny ???? ?
joking aside:

 

Medical science took me past my sell-by-date twice.
After the second time, I decided not to take any bullshit from anyone any longer, and to really enjoy every day I am up and running doing more or less useful activities that I enjoy.
Cheers.

[Jimlim]

I agree about genetics, however I also believe people live longer because modern Healthcare system.  My mother is 80 y.o, Thai but been living in America with diabetes since her 50s.  She is managing her disease and could live at least 10+ more years, while all her siblings in Thailand died in their 50s because of diabetes.  Live life ..dont waste time thinking of death ????

 

[faraday]

42 minutes ago, BobBKK said:

Blimey you really are scared. None of us are that important just relax we all go the same way/ I'd rather be dead at 80 with quality life rather than crippled at 90.

Until you reach that stage, you really won't know.

 

I remember my father saying that he didn't want to be some 'old disabled man'.

 

Throughout his 80's he was just that, but he was happy.

 

 

 

 

[potless]

18 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

I am now becoming more and more aware that my time on earth is running out . Many of my friends in my age range due to medical issues have all ready sadly popped their clogs

It could be that you are grieving for the loss of your friends? Not always easy to admit to.                            Regarding marijuana, I used to find that it enhanced whatever mood I was in. Great when good, worse when not good. Anti depressants are a last resort, bear in mind that many people feel worse before they feel better. Pack a case and visit somewhere you've never been. Refresh your mind. Good luck.          

[rwill]

We all die.  No need to dwell on it.  Enjoy life and look at the beauty in nature.  Just try and have a positive attitude.

[toofarnorth]

18 hours ago, NCC1701A said:

I'm 63 and I told my girlfriend that every month I am traveling somewhere alone because she can't come with me due to her business. 

 

I still can ride my motorcycle but every year it gets heavier. :)

 

I am in very good health and I am going to keep banging away until I drop.

Went up around the mountains today on my Forza , missed the rain and had a great time . I think my Enfield in England would be gone by now as I really don't do cold. I too bang away as much as poss. but the banging is getting a bit quieter at 72 yo.

[phantomfiddler]

Frequent intelligent and constructive conversations with honest and constructive peers is a very necessary thing to do. I am way over your age and feel no highly negative thoughts such as yours. The Japanese have a very good saying "Look after the old bod and everything else will take care of itself". Above all, stay active, and think about all the other people who are in a much worse situation. Good luck ????

[stropper]

 YA, i am 73 and feel the same as you, my antidote is i lay down and remember all the good and bad things that i have done in the past, have a laugh, then i say to myself would i do it all again, the answer  is NO. so  then i just get up and get into the next adventure thats on NOW, and at 73 there is still so many ! ps it is very hard to play golf to your age at 30, but at 73 its a breeze! family genetics, dad 83. mum 97, gran1 .105, gran2, 102. granpa,1 105. granpa2 80, died a alco, so could be around for a bit yet 

Edited June 26, 2019 by stropper
ages

[xylophone]

1 hour ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Any one here who had parents that lived a long life span , do you think that because your parents survived for that long period of time , then your family genetics may in some way be a positive thing in helping you to follow the family history of longevity .

 

 

 

 

 

.

My father died at the age of 88 or 90 (I'm not sure about that as I was adopted so didn't really know him) whilst my birth mother is still alive at age 90.

 

What's more, my father played football at a good level, as did I, he liked his red wine, as do I and he liked his music and singing, as do I, so we are as alike as peas in a pod so to speak, so if I get to live to that age, then I'll be happy, if I don't, then cést la vie, or not as the case may be!

 

My friendly doctor/surgeon in NZ really believes that genetics play a major part in one's lifespan and illnesses, so I'll take his word for it!

[Mukdahanman]

Dear Whip me granny (best name on the forum)

Live every day as if it’s your last, love the people around you, celebrate each day that you wake up alive on this amazing planet, and look forward to whatever comes next ????

[KC 71]

I will be 48 in 3 months time
I have had a few car / bike accidents over the years
My sister says ‘ I’m like a cat ( 9 lives) [emoji846]
Just recently i have started to feel a-lot of body pain
I guess it catches up with us all in the end !
What with my ‘ rock and roll lifestyle ,back in the days’
I feel lucky to still be here now!
I still worry too much these days about things
And i know worrying is no
good for your health/ or wont change anything
I guess i am a silly old sod !


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[Sandy Freckle]

I'm only 63..., and fortunately for me I never stopped surfing since I was a young kid..., I still love getting out there, although can't cut the mustard on the big days anymore. The answer for me is and will remain - keep active, keep moving forward, keep following the mantras of "your never too old to play like a kid"..., and hold tight with an attitude of gratitude. Oh and I stretch for at least 20 min every morning and before I hit the sack. And most importantly, I think it's beneficial to never...., ever, make a rod for your own back.

Edited June 26, 2019 by Sandy Freckle

[Mansell]

There was a movie where the protagonist came to the end of his life.....he was an American Indian. He said, "If I had known I was going to die all those years ago I would have lived every moment in the now." I took that philosophy for life.....I live now and one day I will die....it could be next week, or it could be in twenty years time. I look at the twenty years ahead as I have a loving caring funny wife, two good boys. I am 75 and she is 43, but she cracks me up every day......I want to live for those twenty more years in this loving environment. 

You said you have a good family supporting you etc. you are blessed, enjoy the blessings of each day and be grateful. In this world there is only Love and Laughter......if you have both you are a millionaire of blessings.

[Cactus99]

Wow, I read your post and expected the worst from this forum. I was surprised to see a lot of good advice. 

 

To reiterate what others have said.

1. One needs to keep busy with something. When your mind is actively engaged it has less time to worry. A new hobby or hobbies. Volunteer work. Study something. Take a course.

2. As someone said "I think you are in a mild depression". I agree. These types of ongoing or continuous thoughts can be a symptom of depression. And don't be afraid to try an anti-depression medication. Everyones brain chemistry is different, so there nearly always is some trial and error in terms of medication and dosage. (I'm a medical doctor).

3. You are in good health and that you give you comfort & confidence. (Having said that everyone should have health insurance, ok?)

4. "70 is the new 60 or maybe even 55". We live in different times. We are doing and behaving differently at this age than our parents or grandparents did. The number is far less important than the mindset to be active and engaged. I have a friend who is 50. He runs Ultra Marathons competitively (multi-day events, covering more than a hundred miles and in crazy terrain and environments), all over the world. And there are others who are significantly older than him of course. Many! The point is, while I don't know that we are healthier now, what I do know is that people for some time now, have stopped giving too much credence or significance to any given number or age. And that is correct because it has been a false limitation we were wrongly imposing on ourselves. 

5. While I never thought "Live for Today" was particularly good advice earlier on, it DOES have a different meaning now. You SHOULD live for today and for everyday! Be grateful for the things you DO have (there are always plenty of people on earth less well off than wherever you are on any scale), and look at everyday as a new opportunity to do better. Every single day you can start afresh if need be. 

6. Make new friends. I know it may be difficult, and I don't know your personal situation. If you're not married or attached-find a person that you and he/she would benefit a like spending more time with. It Doesn't have to be a great romantic love (but it can be ???? ). Someone to eat with, talk with, share with, and spend quiet time with. And also other friends.

Good luck to you. I'm glad you created your post. I hope you have found some ideas here. You are not alone. You are not at the end of anything at all, and there is plenty to live for and look forward to! But it will take some lifestyle change & mental change. Let's get to it! Be well.

[moe666]

Whip me, stop thinking about it, when morbid thoughts arise stop, thinking about it will make you old. I am 73 I have issuess but do not dwell on them, I go to the gym, ride my motorbike, drink a few beers and go down to BKK to see a friend of mine every now and then. Think young and you will be young.

[AlexRRR]

gees...its so simple.....love your life...one day its going to end....be happy in what you do if not change it simple as that...

[Lacessit]

1 hour ago, phantomfiddler said:

Frequent intelligent and constructive conversations with honest and constructive peers is a very necessary thing to do. I am way over your age and feel no highly negative thoughts such as yours. The Japanese have a very good saying "Look after the old bod and everything else will take care of itself". Above all, stay active, and think about all the other people who are in a much worse situation. Good luck ????

The Romans said it before the Japanese, I believe. Mens sana in corpore sano. A healthy mind in a healthy body. Before them, the Greeks said Gnothi seathon. Know yourself.

[federico]

11 hours ago, BritManToo said:

At 63 I've had enough and will welcome death (but not illness).

Why keep going, I've done everything I wanted.

i can hear it coming now...

bye bye and bon voyage !

[TKDfella]

Ha, coincidentally, a friend wrote and told me he had just retired. One evening alone in his house he suddenly realised that he had entered the last quarter. He said that he hadn't done anything spectacular in life and if hadn't done it earlier he would be less likely doing it now, 'oh dear, oh hum...etc.' I just replied that he might...write a book...climb a mountain...that there were a 101 things he could do before the end comes...but whatever he did...make it unforgettable.

Who were we congratulating here just the other day? He's 'done his bit' (as they say)...now Mr. OP maybe it's your turn eh? 

[stropper]

19 hours ago, brokenbone said:

no girl is ever going to be intimate with you again

so why would you want to linger on in this nasty place ?

the only thing left is pain, cramps, digestive issues and so forth,

thank goodness youre soon outa here.

only catch is the moment you exit,

have a nice one

how wrong are you , i am 73 and still getting it up with no problems,  or pills,enclosed is a picture of my wife, why do you thing she is smiling, big as a bull!

[stropper]

Just now, stropper said:

how wrong are you , i am 73 and still getting it up with no problems,  or pills,enclosed is a picture of my wife, why do you thing she is smiling, big as a bull!

 

[Mac98]

12 hours ago, geoffbezoz said:

You are as old as you feel.  Very true saying for most people. Which is exactly why you should have a GF/wife at least 40 to 50 years younger than yourself. Then when you feel her you feel young ????????

Correct: You are only as old as who you eat.

[Mac98]

19 hours ago, brokenbone said:

no girl is ever going to be intimate with you again

so why would you want to linger on in this nasty place ?

the only thing left is pain, cramps, digestive issues and so forth,

thank goodness youre soon outa here.

only catch is the moment you exit,

have a nice one

Crazy talk. I had the best time of my life during a two-year  relationship with a beautiful young Thai lady that was consumated on my 75th birthday. But the OP is married and a different situation. If I was still married I would be suicidal.

[rumak]

3 hours ago, Dumbastheycome said:

I hope nobody is rash enough to "recommend" that suggestion but up to you.

An alternative if all warnings are heeded about not being used in conjunction with prescriptions may be St Johns Wort.

Why preoccupation with age if you are healthy? I only  piss myself off when I look in the mirror because it reminds me I am not the  40 something I feel like I am.

even in the mirror i look pretty good.   its those damn lying photos of myself that really have me confused.

who is that old guy ?

[rumak]

4 hours ago, marcusarelus said:

Of course Anti depressants work.  Doctors wrote 64.7 million prescriptions for them in 2016.  

Grand conspiracy between doctors and pharmacy.  Sure.  

Telling people that worship the medical INDUSTRY anything is like trying to get cult followers not to drink the cool aid .  Saying "maybe you should think about it....  or maybe there is another reason/answer " is like telling a zealot there is no god.   To them, doctors are the gods.  

Modern medicine saved my life once .  I am open minded ..... but not a blind follower. 

[Thomas J]

[lvr181]

12 hours ago, Lacessit said:

It is what it is, no point to stressing about it. Eat healthy, have regular sex, exercise and moderate the alcohol consumption. Keep the mind active by reading TV posts.

Agreed. Do not fear death itself (it is inevitable) but you are allowed to be concerned about how it happens. We all hope for a peaceful death (without trauma) and that is the best we can expect. Now, FORGET IT. I am many years ahead of you, fortunately in good health, still planning ahead, trying to keep healthy, (physically & mentally) keep a good sense of humour, enjoy time with family and friends. Be empathetic to those family or friends less fortunate than yourself, listen to them, be the one they can confide in, IF they wish to.

Just keep living and enjoying life the best way you can, do not think or worry about the inevitable. Carpe Diem.

HTH

[oldrunner]

Just turned 79, have more crap wrong, heart, muscles, etc. safe retirement income good wife only drawback her family great but I don't speak Thai (20+ AF. ran bar, that was fun, many good guys, lot of CIA types (I was AF spook for a bit so fit in) now almost all gone. watch Facebook,

Gmail, E-mail stay in touch with relatives all children (nieces/nephews/grand nieces/grandnephews their families growing and not terribly interesting ...think maybe I'll make 80 but no incentive. Older brother now 83 has family and they are growing up. So, in a nut shell, happy with life I've lived, no regrets, love wife and visa/versa she will be protected when I'm gone and that makes me happy, she'll have $140,000 non-taxable US to bank plus 75,000 Baht per month til she dies. She is only 62 so all is well.

[Dumbastheycome]

30 minutes ago, rumak said:

Telling people that worship the medical INDUSTRY anything is like trying to get cult followers not to drink the cool aid .  Saying "maybe you should think about it....  or maybe there is another reason/answer " is like telling a zealot there is no god.   To them, doctors are the gods.  

Modern medicine saved my life once .  I am open minded ..... but not a blind follower. 

Of course there is the need  for intervention via pharmaceuticals but! and there is  a very big  but....between the industry which promotes an automatic  dependency and the "real" need for pharmaceutical intervention in  every case has become totally out of balance. As  you say "Doctors" are held in great awe. Not sure I would  say  Gods  but  "agent angels" perhaps.

Hospitals and Doctors  are deluged  with  people who desire a magic cure  for anything ranging from imminent death  by cause of incurable disease or trivial casual issues real or imagined or even secondary to  personal  daily routine and expectations.

Almost invariably they are provided with something. All ! And that is the  focus of the  "industry". Not any magic cure necessarily. Only the provision of  product...at a price.

Dependency on such has been ingrained  into mentality.